Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot and dialogue! (Unfortunately!)

A/N: So it's been a while…but here it is I hope you enjoy!

There is a crack in everything,
that's how the light gets in.
-Leonard Cohen

Once the Music Stops, Chapter 6: Lily's story

Sirius practically floated back to the castle. He wasn't sure yet what was bothering Lily but he was sure that the music box he carefully cradled in his hands, wrapped with the same silk cloth Melody had had around it in the shop, was a very magical object indeed. Not only was the box magical in the sense that it was magically made and ran on magic, but how Sirius felt in its presence revealed that it also held a more unconventional magic that could not be found easily or duplicated. Sirius knew right down to the marrow of his bones that this magic could and would soothe Lily's soul and help her lay the past behind her. He just had to give it to her. And she just had to accept it.

As soon as Sirius got back he quickly slipped up to his dormitory to tuck the box away until he could get Lily in private to give it to her. He then joined the boys for dinner in the Great Hall.

"Sorry I took a little longer then I thought mates." Sirius said as he sat down and began filling his plate heartily. "You know how it is shopping for girls. Speaking of which…where are the girls?" He asked, noticing their absence, and anxious to see how Lily was doing. He also hoped he could get her to agree to meet him somewhere later.

"I think they said they were working on that Charms essay we have due next week," Remus said as he reached for the pumpkin juice. "Can you hand that pitcher to me Peter?" He asked.

"Here," said James handing it to him instead. "No offense Peter but I'd rather not have to change my robes again. The boys laughed and Peter turned red as they all remembered last week when Peter knocked the pitcher all over James not once but twice in the same meal.

"Good call Jamey boy," chuckled Sirius. "Charms homework you say?" He asked referring back to their previous topic of conversation. That gave him an idea for getting Lily alone. They all knew she was the best at Charms; it would be totally believable for him to ask her for help. Also, he knew the other boys probably wouldn't want to start it yet and the girls were working on it now so hopefully that would decrease the chances of someone else wanting her help too.

"Yup, can you believe they started already?" Asked James in disbelief at the prospect of starting an assignment a whole week ahead of time.

"Mmm, girls and their work ethic; who needs a whole week to right a two foot essay?" added Remus sarcastically.

"Not me, that's for sure," said James cockily.

"Actually, maybe it's not such a bad idea to start it a little early….what with Lily's party and all I mean" Sirius said in order to give himself a plausible need to do work early when all the boys knew he was just as bad as the rest of them when it came to procrastinating.

"Start early!" exclaimed James. "That's all the more reason to put it off. We have party preparations to take care of! The girls are going to decorate and stuff but we need to sneak into Hogsmede and get the rest of the food and drinks."

"Well then who's going to distract Lily?" Asked Sirius, thinking quickly. "I mean if the girls are decorating and we're sneaking off to Hogsmede…" he trailed off pretending to let them think about it for a minute.

"Good point mate. Maybe you should ask Lily to help you with the homework…we all know she's the best at Charms and this way we can sneak around while you keep her busy away from Gryffindor Tower," suggested James. Sirius couldn't believe his ears. He couldn't have asked for a better chance to get Lily alone without the others thinking something strange was going on. And, because they needed a distraction they would want him to keep her busy for a while and he was sure that this was going to take a while.

"Sounds good to me mate," agreed Sirius out loud to the boys. "Ill just go find her after dinner and ask her to meet me tomorrow right after Transfiguration." The others agreed that would be the best time and began chatting excitedly as they planned out the menu for Lily's party. Halfway through their discussion Lily, Julie, and Maggie joined them and the conversation changed to homework and quidditch. Sirius noticed that Lily barely said a word and mostly kept her eyes on her plate; on which sat most of her food uneaten. He knew that approaching her past wasn't going to be easy, but he also knew it wasn't going to be impossible. He cared enough to help her make things right, he couldn't stand to see her in this state one more day.

It took some convincing, but Lily eventually agreed to meet Sirius and help him with the Charms homework the next day. She had purposely been avoiding him since she had found the pink duffle bag under her bed. She knew that the others were preoccupied enough not to notice she was upset about anything, but Sirius had been there from her discovery and had been watching her like a hawk ever since. She hoped that Sirius wanting to meet her didn't mean he was going to try and pry or make her spill her guts to him. She just didn't think she could handle that. So, it was with great reluctance that she headed up to the Library after Transfiguration class.

Sirius knew that if he tried to spring things on Lily right away she would probably just run back to the common room or her bedroom. He didn't want to be responsible for ruining her party preparations along with causing her to have a melt down, so he thought it would be best to actually have her help him with the Charms homework for a little while then casually bring the topic up afterwards on a stroll through the castle. The first part had gone fine. Lily seemed to be a little on edge at first, suspecting that he was up to something, but after they started talking about Charms and Charms alone she seemed to loosen up. Admittedly, she didn't talk about anything other then the homework, but to Sirius, just talking to him was an improvement on her demeanor compared to the silence and isolation she had been exhibiting lately. It was an added bonus that he actually got some of his assignment done early, especially considering that Lily went off on him he could just end up in the hospital wing hexed unrecognizable; in which case he would have no time to do it. He hoped that wouldn't be the case. He decided that it would be best to lure Lily to a more private place after working on their Charms in the library. So, after a few hours of working, he suggested they head back to the common room.

"Hey Lil," Sirius said as soon as they had left the Library. "I really want to show you a new room James, Remus, Peter, and I discovered." This was the most important part. Lily had to agree to his detour for him to get her alone to give her the music box.

"No thanks Sirius, I'm tired and it's getting late." Lily said, suspecting that he wanted to ask her what was wrong again. But Sirius had expected this so he decided to let a little secret slip in order to get her to come.

"Oh come on Lil I'm not really supposed to tell you but the others are working on plans for your birthday and I really don't want to be the one to spoil it. Let me just show you this room and give them a little longer to finish up." He hoped the others wouldn't be mad at him for letting anything out, but he figured this was important and he didn't really give away any details or anything.

"Oh, alright, I guess we could go check it out for a little while," Lily agreed reluctantly. Sirius actually had no idea where he was going to take Lily. He hoped that if they wandered around long enough they would find a quiet empty classroom or something they could sit and talk in. He just had to take her to a more remote part of the castle so she wouldn't think he was up to something and leave. After wandering together in silence, they took to pacing back and forth along hallways staring at the endless tapestries and paintings until they bored of the scenery and moved on to the next hallway. After absent mindedly passing a tapestry depicting Barnabas the Barmy's foolish attempt to train trolls for the ballet Lily stopped in front of it as if she had just noticed what was actually going on in the picture. Sirius watched quietly as she turned paler and paler and tears welled up in her eyes.

"Alright, that's it," Sirius said gently grabbing her arm. "Lily, we have to talk about this, now."

"Sirius…I can't." she started to protest, but Sirius wouldn't take no for an answer. He led Lily through a door that he hadn't even noticed and couldn't quite recall where it led, but it would have to do. As they stepped through the door, Lily started to tremble. "Sirius, what the hell are you trying to pull?" She asked him furiously. "How did you even now?"

"What…" Sirius trailed off. He glanced around the room for the first time and saw that it resembled a mix between a ballet studio and a comfy living room. There were barres and mirrors lining the walls at one end of the room and a huge plush couch and fireplace at the other side. "Lily, I swear to God I've never even seen this room before! How did I know what?" He asked baffled at her reaction.

"I can't…I just…can't" and with that, she began to cry.

"Lil, this has to end at some point. You're never going to heal if you don't let whatever you're holding in out. Please," he begged her. "Don't shut me out." Lily started to sob and Sirius gently guided her to the couch and rubbed her back as she allowed herself to be enveloped in his arms. When she finally calmed down enough to speak, she began her story.

"Ok, so you know I have a sister named Petunia…and you know I had a dad…" Lily began. "But…well obviously I had a mom once…" she trailed off as her eyes began to get misty again. "…and I had another sister, her name was Anne," here Lily actually smiled for a second. "I called her Anne Banana. She was the sweetest person on the face of the Earth. And her smile could stop traffic it was so beautiful. And when she danced there would be this…this…intake of breath almost that would go through the entire room as they saw her grace and poise. She was just a shining star Sirius." The sound of his name made him jump. He thought she had forgotten he was even there listening for a second. "Anyways, "she continued. "We both danced…ballet. I don't know if you remembered me leaving sometimes during first year for the weekend here and there to go to recitals and performances. We were both very into dance and…and…" she began to falter and Sirius grabbed one of her hands to show her that he was there for her and she could go on. She gave him an appreciative glance and continued on encouraged. "Well, one weekend Anne and I had auditions at around the same time. My dad was picking my sister Petunia up from college in the United States for her winter break and my mom had to drive both of us, so she was rushing to get both of us there on time and hopefully see us both perform. My sister's audition started first and was all the way in another town so my mom dropped me off early and went with her first. They were rushing to get to mine…but they never made it there. They were…they were…hit" she finished with some effort. "…By a drunk driver. He hit them head on after swerving across the road. I had finished my audition so long and I was just sitting there wondering where they were. I thought things had run behind or there was traffic or something. But…at the same time I had this dull ache inside and as the time passed I started to panic. There was a police officer…he came into the dance hall and asked the receptionist if she could please locate me. But I already knew when I saw him walk in who he was looking for. He told me they were rushed to the hospital and that that was where he was supposed to bring me. When I got there everyone was talking in hushed voices. They kept looking over at me uncomfortably. They tried to locate my dad and Petunia but they were all the way across the ocean…Eventually, they had to break the news to me. I already knew but it hit me like I had been dropped flat on my back. I lost all the air in my lungs and I…panicked. I begged the doctor to let me see them…I had to know for myself. And there was my Anne…my little Anna Banana just laying there. She had lost her glow. She was cold and pale. I begged for her shoes…she was still wearing her ballet slippers. They must have really rushed to see me…" Lily stopped here. She looked at loss for words like she was just losing her mom and sister all over again. Sirius gave her hand, which he was still holding, a squeeze and she seemed to snap out of it slightly. "Dumbledore came. He knew through some magic that I needed him…and I did badly. He brought me back to school after the…the…funeral," she seemed to choke on the word 'funeral'. "And that was that…the end of my family. My dad slipped away from us, unable to stand the thought of losing my mom and littlest sister. He seemed to forget he had two more people who still loved and needed him. And my sister Petunia turned rotten in bitterness at having to take responsibility for the household. I lost both of them too in a sense…my dad literally and my sister…well she would hate to hear me even admitting we're related. It was bad enough that I was good at dancing but when I got accepted to Hogwarts too…well…we pretty much severed ties right then. The accident only made it worse. They were coming to me so it was my fault." Lily stopped there, exhausted from telling her tale.

"But why didn't you ever tell us?" asked Sirius. "We love you Lil, we could have helped you."

"I felt so guilty, angry, sad…" tears were running down her face again and she seemed so alone in that moment Sirius had to wrap his arms around her again.

"What happened was not your fault," he said gently. "You need to realize that."

"If I hadn't wanted them to be at my audition so badly they wouldn't have been there…"

"Lily, they loved you. I'm sure they wanted to be there as badly as you wanted them to be there," he reassured her. "But…I'm curious if you don't mind me asking…what brought it all back to you the day we were in your room?" he asked.

"I found them…" was all she said.

"Found…?" Sirius prompted.

"I found her shoes…I still had them in a pink duffle bag under my bed. Along with my old toe shoes," she added almost as an after thought. "But I don't dance anymore," she said with such force Sirius drew back a bit.

"But why?" he asked bewildered.

"Sirius…once the music stops…you don't dance any more. That's what Anne and my mom were for me…my music. Without them, I don't know how to be a dancer. I barely even know how to be myself anymore. I survived this long by forgetting about dance and forgetting about that day."

"You can't just forget Lil, I'm sure they wouldn't want that," Sirius said frustrated.

"Yeah well, thanks to me and dancing, I'll never be able to ask them will I?" And with that Lily made to get up off the couch.

"No, wait," Sirius pleaded gently grabbing her hand which she had pulled away. "Let me give me your birthday present first."

"My…what?" Lily was so taken aback she sat right back down. "What does my birthday have to do with any of this? I don't deserve to get presents," she buried her face in her hands. "What have I done?" she asked desperately. "I lost them forever."

"Shh," Sirius comforted her. "It's ok, it's ok. Just look at what I have first. You haven't done anything wrong and you haven't lost them forever…because they are still a part of you and who you've become as a person. And, I think they would have wanted you to continue on with the one thing that gave the three of you a special bond…" Sirius trailed off and gently pulled out the cloth wrapped package in his book bag. He sat it gently on a coffee table in front of the couch. "Go ahead," he said. "Open it."

A/N: Alright…to be continued…dun dun dun. How will Lily react to Sirius's present? Will he be able to bring music back into her life? Stay tuned and find out I'll have the next chapter out as soon as I can…I may be busy reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince first though! PLEASE REVIEW!

p.s. how many of you guessed right away what room Lily and Sirius are in! hehe hope you liked it!