I loved the books, simple. I saw the category and decided to write a short one shot about my favourite character. Hope you like it.

If Only

By Jnr Cpl Scarlett

I was only eighteen when my life was cut short. It wasn't fair. My master abandoned me. He told me to kill her, she whom I'd fallen in love with, her of glittering dark eyes and ebony hair. I resisted. I'd won the battle. Then I was killed; struck in the back. I fell dead instantly. I needed to tell her how I felt. I loved her. If only she knew.

My master, the Master was like a father to me. He named me his son. He told me to marry the Johdila. Beautiful as I knew she was, I loved her servant, Kestrel. If only she had been the mysterious princess I was betrothed to.

Her brother became a close friend of mine. They were so alike, yet so different. He was intelligent, and quiet. Brooding, most people would call it. I knew he must have been planning something. Rumour had it the Johdila felt for him. I wasn't at all bothered. All that mattered was my Kestrel. If only…

Sometimes I wish I was alive again, but it wouldn't make any difference. Kestrel sacrificed herself for her people's happiness not long after I died. I see her sometimes. We acknowledge each other when we pass along the road to happiness. We drift in and out of there. We even spoke earlier. She said she missed her brother Bowman and her little sister Pinto.

Who have I got to miss me, or to miss? No-one, that's who. If only I'd done something different with my life, rather than joining the Mastery's Army. What could I have done? I used to write a bit of poetry. I composed one recently. I plan on giving it to Kestrel when I next see her.

I don't exist anymore, neither does she

The days pass by like years now

But I still hope of seeing her

When the century comes and goes.

She's as radiant as the moon

Dark, yet bright

She shines through day and night

And I feel for her.

No matter where I'm from

I still destroyed her home

She'll never forgive me

But I can dream.

If only she knew

If only I could say

How I love her

And how she'll never love me.

I wonder what she'll think of it. Or maybe I should keep it, and savour the thoughts of being with her. Yes, I won't tell her. I'll just waste into nothing. I will become non-existent.

It's a strange thing, love.

If only I understood it…