Random Events From the Shaman King Dub

Chapter 3

The Boy from the North

By: Eliv

So you've probably wondered what Horo Horo did on his perilous journey to Tokyo, how he managed to sell his goods and hitchhike, how he sold all those folk crafts, how he… well… all those will be revealed here in…….

The Boy from the North

Horo Horo: Don't worry! I'll be fine. You'll see! When I get to Tokyo, I'll start by planting lots and lots of beautiful flowers.

Pilica: Yeah, yeah. Don't forget you're laxatives.

Horo Horo: *blush* Hey, don't be telling everyone that!

Pilica: Well it's not my fault that you have pooping problems!

Horo Horo: It's just that… that… my… BUTT HOLE IS TOO SMALL!!!!!!

Pilica: Yeah… I've heard that story too. "If we had enough money, I'd go to surgery and have a bigger butt hole." *rolls eyes*

(A/N: I know Pilica is kinda OOC but… yeah… No one minds do they?)

Horo Horo: Well it's not my fault that…… you're oatmeal tastes like doggie doo!

Pilica: Are you talking about my oatmeal????

Horo Horo: ^_^ ;; I'll just go now….

Pilica: You better!!

~*Later*~

Horo Horo: Now, I'll need to take my map and follow it to Tokyo. *pulls out map* Okay here it is. *puts map on the ground* ……… HEY! IT'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE!!! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FOLLOW A DEFECTED MAP??? T_T I'm lost now….

Person Driving Down the Street: ……… *sees Horo* What is he doing?

Horo Horo: *sees person* Oh! *jumps in the middle of the road* EXCUSE MEE!!!!! CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY MAP???!!! IT'S DEFECTED AND I CAN'T FOLLOW IT!!!

Person Driving Down the Street: WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! *swerves*

Horo Horo: *keeps jumping in front of the person's truck* I REALLY NEED HELP!! CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME??!!

Person Driving Down the Street (PDDS): *still swerving* STOP JUMPING IN FRONT OF ME!!!!!!

~*Still Later*~

Horo Horo: *somehow managed to get in the person's car* Can you help me now?

PDDS: WHAT THE ---- HOW DID YOU GET IN MY CAR!!!!!!!??????

Horo Horo: You see (ignoring the person) my map is broken and I can't follow it. It's pitiful really. I can't follow a defected map. Though I do wonder how all these lines got all over it. Still, it's probably the design made by the manufacturer. Did I tell you that I can't follow a defected map? It's really hard to follow a map that won't move in the right direction you want it to. There is a big star on it that says Tokyo but I think that that's just to show that this map is supposed to take you to Tokyo. Then there's all these blue and red lines which I think are supposed to be the veins of the map to show that it would take you to the place your trying to go to which in my case would be Tokyo. But I guess that I didn't feed the map it's food or something so that's why it's being defected. I didn't know that you were supposed to feed a map or else I would of found something to feed it. Well.. Maybe not me but Pilica. That's my sister. She would of found something to for it to eat. Hey do you have food? I'm hungry. Pilica told me to follow the map but she didn't say anything about feeding it. Maybe it's because she didn't know either but I would doubt that because she's pretty smart. Even though her oatmeal tastes like doggie doo. Am I boring you? I hope I'm not. It's just that I can't follow a defected map and you asked what I was doing and so I'm telling you and did I mention that I can't follow a defected map?? Wow you have a nice truck. It's blue, I like blue. Can you tell? That's my hair color and it's natural. Why did I tell you that? Because people deny that my hair is natural and it's something I take pride in. I won first place in the "Best Hair" category! I bet you knew that. My picture was all over the newspaper! Did I mention that I can't follow a defected map?

PDDS: What did I do to deserve this??

Horo Horo: Do you know how to fix my map? It's -

PDDS: Defected I know.

Horo Horo: WOW!! HOW DID YOU KNOW!!!!!!??????

PDDS: You told me.

Horo Horo: What are you talking about? I didn't tell you anything! I just got here remember?? *to self* This guy's a nut.

PDDS: You told me lots of stuff! Like how your sister Pilica's oatmeal tastes like doggie doo…

Horo Horo: HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT??!! Are you stalking my sister??? *eyes PDDS evilly*

PDDS: No you told me!!

Horo Horo: Did not! *to self* Are Tokyo people always this nutty?

PDDS: Anyway… here's Tokyo…

Horo Horo: Already??!!

PDDS: Well you were talking for like 10 hrs straight.

Horo Horo: Was not! I didn't say a word!

PDDS: *to self* Are people from the North always this crazy?

Horo Horo: I'm not crazy.

PDDS: *severe shock* HOW DID YOU KNOW WHAT I SAID??!!

Horo Horo: Because the ghost of the Pepsi can you ran over yesterday told me.

PDDS: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Horo Horo: Can you let me out here?

PDDS: *nod nod*

Horo Horo: Thanks! It was fun riding with you! ^_^

PDDS: Yeah… *drives off really, really fast*

~*Still, Still Later*~

Horo Horo: Ah, this looks like a nice spot to sell stuff. *sits* *sees person coming to look* HI! This is genuine folk craft that I made myself!! It's to bring you good luck and ward off bad spirits and all that hullabaloo. BUT! I have some extra special ones that can ward off constipation! You want one, I can see it in your eyes! It's the toilet shaped one there. Where did I get the shape from? It was inspired by a my toilet at home. Yes sir it was! I'm a pure genius I know! Don't worry! I'll be here for a while. Why? My map is defected and I can follow it. So I have to buy a new one and then try to follow it. But until I have more money I can buy one so I have to sell some of these craft thingies. Oh hi! Do you want to buy one of my genuine folk crafts? I made them myself.

Person: Yeah… I know…

Horo Horo: You did??!!

Person: ………. So this one is for Constipation? *points to toilet charm*

Horo Horo: Hey, you're good! Yeah it is, it was inspired by --

Person: Your toilet at home.

Horo Horo: WOAH!!!!!!! YOU CAN READ MY THOUGHTS TOO???!!!

Person: Umm… you told me…

Horo Horo: I didn't tell you anything. You just got here.

Person: No I didn't. I was here for about an hour now.

Horo Horo: Wow… you're good at sneaking up then too! You've been watching me for a WHOLE hour!

Person: Anyway….

~*Still, Still, Still Later*~

Horo Horo: I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go!

Person looking at stuff: ……

Horo Horo: NO SERIOUSLY!!! I GOTTA GO!!!!!!!

Person looking at stuff: …….

Horo Horo: Can't hold it… can't hold it… can't hold it…

Person looking at stuff: Maybe one on your charm thingies will help. Do you have one that will rid having to go?

Horo Horo: Umm… I don't think that one came in yet…

Person looking at stuff: Oh…

Horo Horo: I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go! *runs and goes*

~*Still, Still, Still, Still Later*~

Horo Horo: *comes back* NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! MY STUFF IS GONE!!!!!!! T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_TT_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T_T

~*Still, Still, Still, Still, Still Later*~

Police: Okay can you repeat that?

Horo Horo: *takes breath* I was coming to Tokyo to plant flowers but I couldn't follow my map because it was defected and so I asked this guy to help me and he let me ride with him to Tokyo. And I told him that I couldn't follow a defected map and he guessed all these things about me and it was scary it was like he was stalking me. But then I got to Tokyo and I started selling my stuff and some more people seemed to know what I was going to say. I guess all people are like that. But then I had to go really, really bad and so I started singing a song that went kinda like this I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, gotta go, I gotta go, gotta go, gotta go. But then I couldn't hold it in, so I went. It was a number 2 you know! I was prairie dogging it for a while… I know that's nasty, you don't have to tell me that. So I went and I was immediately relieved but then when I got back… all my stuff was gone! T_T

Police: Yeah… *to other police man* Did you get all that?

Other Policeman: Umm… I only got that he was coming to Tokyo.

Police: *sigh* Can you repeat that again?

Horo Horo: I guess… but can you get it all this time? I'm tired of repeating it.

Other Policeman: Well so am I? How many times is this now?

Police: *looks at counter* 120 times now.

Other Policeman: *groan*

To Be Continued…

I know that this seems utterly not complete but then I guess that it would just go to where he meets Yoh and them but, if I must, I'll try to continue it in another chapter… until then, read and review okay? ^___^