Lord Cynic: "I'd best get a story in while the school holidays last. Blah… call it unhealthy, but 4 days without the Internet was horrible. But during that time, I checked out something called Angelic Layer. I think I found another obsession… and maybe some fanfic inspiration. Everyone seems fixed on Ohjiro, though. (shrugs) Oh well.

Anyways, this was written during one of my more… weirder moods. Don't judge the writer by the story, though. I am not a chikan! I'm wiggly Icchan! Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle... okay, I'll stop now."

Lord Cynic: "I don't own Chrono Crusade. Blah."

One reason to hate rain

One of the worst things about working in the rain is the dreaded combination of the earth and hydrogen oxide. Those two natural elements, when fused together by fate (or torrid weather conditions), create something so horrible, so vile, that nothing can escape its wrath. If it ensnared anything, it would drag it down and suffocate its prey mercilessly. It was a spiteful force; one that many have encountered but none have succeeded to escape from without receiving punishment. It was truly powerful, and unquestionable unstoppable while in its prime.

And it would take an eternity for Sister Rosette Christopher and her assistant Chrono to wash off that mud, after being caked in it after their latest mission. However, first another eternity would have to transpire before the demon could regain his sense of hearing, after an anguished outburst from the blonde exorcist upon their re-entry into their (miraculously unscathed) vehicle.

"Yuk!" This icky mud's all your fault, Chrono!" Rosette whined pitifully as she pulled the Ford up inside the Magdalene Order. Chrono gaped at her incredulously.

"What? You're the one who tripped, and dragged me in!" he protested. "You ruined my coat. It won't be the same for weeks!"

He tugged vainly at the violated piece of red clothing. However, the irate blonde next to him demanded immediate attention, and he gulped when he noticed her venomous glare.

"Your coat is not a living creature!" she hissed, scowling. "Unlike me, however! You could've been a gentleman and caught me before I fell! It's common sense, not to mention polite, to protect a lady at all times against anything and everything, you know."

"I saw no lady," Chrono muttered through clenched teeth and lowered eyes. "All I saw was a hideous, bad-tempered and bloodthirsty monster... and the demon... OWW!"

"What was that?" Rosette growled as she subjected Chrono to a devastating noogie attack.

"Oww! Oww! Oww! Oww!" the childlike demon yelped. Suddenly, he felt the relief from the pressure, although he kept his eyes closed. Soon, he heard the sharp slam of the driver's door and the crunch of boots on gravel, which meant that Rosette was stomping back into the convent. Sighing silently, he exited the car through his side and trudged in the opposite direction, towards the Elder's hut. "At least I can attempt to clean myself off. I'm still getting soaked in this rain, though. Apple sau... urk!"

"Where do you think you're going?" Rosette asked as she dragged her assistant by the ear, across the courtyard. "For all I know, the Elder's shower water might be poisoned."

That could explain his eccentric yet perverted mind, Chrono contemplated exasperatedly. Suddenly, the implication of Rosette's gesture struck him like one of her uppercuts. "Wait, Rosette, where are you taking me?"

Rosette glanced back at him, half-amused, half-impatient, but continued her stride.

"Inside the convent," she replied matter-of-factly. "Is that a problem?"

"Well, no," Chrono mumbled absent-mindedly. He discovered what he'd said when his contractor flashed him a malevolent smirk, and was instantly mortified. "I... I mean of course it is! What if anyone caught us?" He paled at the thought. "What if Sister Kate caught us? I may be the killer of 100 demons, but she'll be the one to kill me!"

"If I've told you once, I've told you 1000 times," Rosette chided her wimpy companion, "stop being such a wet blanket!"

Another flash of a sinister smirk, another blanch and a dive by Chrono's stomach almost literally to Hell.

"Besides, it might be fun to ride that old woman's goat," Rosette added with a malicious laugh.

She's as awful as Aion after a heavy binge session, Chrono thought with heavy dread.

Nonetheless, he allowed Rosette to guide him inside the building by force. Despite his apprehension and the risk of being skinned to the tips of his pointy ears by a furious Sister Kate, he relished Rosette's warm but assertive contact.

At least it was better than the atrocious muck coating him from head to toe.

It was the same mud smothering him, which dripped on the floor of Rosette's room as he sat on his bed. One would imagine that the mud would've dried up by now and turned him into a living sculpture by now, right? Wrong! As a result, Chrono was unconsciously making a mess that would give Sister Kate several stomach cramps. However, with Rosette occupying the showers and Chrono locked in heavy contemplation, the stomach-churning puddle of filth remained neglected.

Such was the demon's preoccupation, though, that he was unaware of the ceased running of water in Rosette's bathroom, or the slow turning of the door handle. The blonde, towel-clad girl noticed his stupor as soon as she could see the hole he was burning into the floor with his gaze, and yet another smug grin spread across her face. Time to have some fun...

Chrono was miles away in thought, so he didn't notice sudden sagging on the bed. He did, however, feel the pressure of something soft against his back. At first, he passed it off as a pillow, but for some reason it seemed more... solid than that. It's... moving, too. Wait, moving? What the heck is that? It better not be a demon, although Chrono doubted that it would be able to trespass without being blown apart by Rosette. Where was she, anyway? He couldn't hear any running water, but she usually doesn't take as long to get a towel around her. Ack, what was he thinking? Oh no, whatever it was, was pressing further into his back. Although, it was really soft, and seemed... to be like round shapes. But there was nothing like that in the room. Rosette wasn't the type to keep toys in there, no way. At least, as far as he knew. So what could it be?

"Oh, Chrono..."

Holy crap! What the hell did she think she was doing? But, maybe, for once, he wouldn't get into trouble for it. Yeah, that's right. For once, he couldn't get in trouble for seeming like a pervert. Wait, no, he wasn't a pervert, period! But... they were so soft... NO!

With a yelp, Chrono leapt off the bed and zipped inside the bathroom, leaving Rosette to fall forward in shock. However, the sneer didn't leave her face. On the contrary, it was much wider than before, with a trace or two of complacency. She propped herself up on her elbows and stared at the bathroom door. Oh, yes, that was definitely fun. But I'm not finished yet...

Chrono let the clean water wash over him, cleansing his body. He cringed slightly as the hot water occasionally brushed his broken horns, but he ignored it for the most part. If he could handle almost getting torn apart by his fellow kinsmen in battle, he could tolerate the elements. Most importantly of all, he was grateful for anything that took his mind off what just happened in Rosette's room. He still couldn't believe what she was doing...

But you don't deny you enjoy it, do you?

Even if he was alone in the shower, he tried to hide the intense blush rushing to his cheeks. He didn't know if that was his mind or the mind of his more fully developed demon form, but it was uncalled for, especially considering where he was. But for the life of him, he didn't know how or why it rose to his thoughts. Maybe he was going crazy or delirious, it could happen, especially after being in Rosette's company for so long. That girl would tire anyone out, regardless of their stamina. However, only he could tolerate it day in, day out. But of course, that was because she was his contractor.

Are you sure that's all?

Chrono had to resist the urge to punch himself for denying what was obvious. And yet, he'd never let it slip. What would happen afterwards? Sure, their contract was near unbreakable, but so would be the consequent rift. Besides, he couldn't let himself delve back into the misery that came after Magdalene's death. Even though Rosette convinced him to live for the future, he couldn't deny the past and what it brought and cost him.

But do you regret meeting Rosette?

Now this he could answer without hesitation. The water running off his body was symbolic of how Rosette cleansed his soul. She taught him how much there was in the world to live for, and how not to dwell in misery like a pathetic loser. She was nowhere near as graceful as Magdalene, and she snored like a rhinoceros. Still, she was the most energetic person he'd ever seen, although ironically so. But she refused to let him dwell on the consequences of their contract, and for the most part, he was successful in pushing those thoughts aside. For that, he was eternally grateful. If only he could find a way to repay her... except for the unforgivable fact that time cannot be returned...

Sighing deeply, he turned off the taps and draped himself in a towel. However, there was too much water in his eyes for him to open them confidently. As a result, he stumbled around aimlessly, blinking the shower water out of his eyes. Thankfully, though, he was able to avoid crashing into anything. At least his demon senses were keeping him from self-inflicted physical harm.

When Rosette crept into the bathroom, however, even Chrono's heightened senses couldn't save him from making a big mistake. Thinking that the door was still closed, he went to grasp the door handle. The only problem was, it was one of Rosette's... ahem...

"YIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!"

"WAAAAAAAAAAA!"

On the flip side, Chrono didn't have to suffer Sister Kate's wrath. On the flop side, that was only because he had to suffer Rosette's.

THE END