It Only Hurts When I Breathe
All Alone In The Moonlight
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"Ow! Oh, sorry!" Mumbled apologies followed them in the dark, all the way to their seats. The loud, violent movie had already started. He knew Kuki hated to be late… But he wasn't sorry. It had been her fault, though he'd never tell her that.
Wincing at the gore on the screen, Kuki grabbed at Wally's hand.
Cuddling up to him, but still in her own seat, Kuki seemed to be begging attention and sympathy, as she let out a long series of whimpers. Girls.
Wally knew that she was looking to get her first kiss tonight, as all females, she probably couldn't wait to romance up her life.
She'd always said she thought it was gross, but that's a foolproof plan to get boys comfortable around her…
Thus allowing her to "entrance" them.
I hated that in people.
Except Kuki. I do love Kuki. It's just… She thinks I'm so stupid. She won't have decent conversations with me, she's so obvious about things she doesn't think I'll get… And I know she doesn't really want to be with me. I'd love for her to just say that she didn't want me. I wouldn't tell anyone, of course…
They'd call me crazy.
But if she told me that, I'd know that she hadn't been lying to me all this time.
Enough talking stupid, and on to pointless movie description.
I'd love to say that we were sitting in the fourth row seats for "Violence the Movie," cleverly hidden under layers of clothes, Kuki so far buried underneath too much make-up, her lips stumbling to the side in that oddly cute kiddy way, because the lipstick was on lopsided.
But, no. No, this movie is "much better. Not so much violence!"
Sometimes she made me wonder. I would want less violence if I wanted to go see "Violence the Movie," at very least, and it's been birthday/Christmas/every gift giving holiday dream to get a ticket for "Violence the Movie IV: Return of the KICK!"?
Well, I suppose, since she would much rather be in "Rainbow Monkeys 2: The Quest of the Ever-Happy Friends," settling for "The Terminator ½: The PG Movie" isn't so bad.
But what's blood and gore for Kuki, is like a… Cookie, to me.
I know that it's a dumb thing to say, but that's what it is. Sweet, mild, a touch of loose flour.
My God, how the mind wanders when your extremely bored, most likely being accused of being gay, because you don't want to kiss a girl that started to feel like your sister some time ago.
Prodding the back of my neck, Kuki was obviously moving in on me. The prodding probably hadn't been so much a warning than a stumble, a mistake.
Pointedly, I dropped my popcorn, pretending to be oblivious.
Kuki pouted, knowing the game I was playing (oddly too well for a ten-year-old to know). "Please," she whispered, not sultry or seductive, just tiny, begging. "Just once."
For the moment I looked at her eyes, so warm and hoping, I felt like she could read my mind. She knew that I was thinking that it was more than likely… Our first date would be our last. Did she just want a souvenir or was she planning on writing a memoir? The only thing I could see through the submissive barrier on the "first layer of Kuki" was that she didn't want this to be the end-all, but she'd willingly change and hide her feelings inside.
More of a sister than ever and yet, so much more renewed crush, I felt wrong all over because I didn't want to ruin this for her, but the thought of her wanting me to kiss her…
Wasn't all that bad.
One. I'd give her one, just a peck, on the cheek. That's more of a sisterly thing, anyway.
Wrapping my arms around her delicately, I leaned over her head, and decided her forehead was as good a target as any. When I was done, I let my arms rest around her, just a little longer, and put my chin on her head. Just reveling in the fact that I didn't sense any disdain or disappointment coming from her.
"This is where we are," I said to her, reassuringly, all the while, though, her oblivious to the meaning. "This is where we can stay, right here, safe and warm. If you want."
She sighed. I wasn't sure if it was from confusion, or if it was the result of her feminine fancies, the romance of whispering sweet "nothings" in her ear in a dark place. Not my idea of romance, at all. I think a movie theater isn't for kissy - kissy - happy - teenage - hormone - fantasies, but for some old fashioned ass-kicking!
Unfortunately, the time ran short for the movie, as it always seems to fly when you're holding someone you may only think of as a sister, ever.
But that would be enough, right?
Love of any kind can change.
I just have to make it up from here, just to see if I can make Kuki happy. If not, I failed, but I won't be missing anything.
I'd decided long ago. On my thirteenth birthday, I'd go calm. I didn't want to remember this. Now, I'm sure that they won't take me out without a kicking fight. It's my life, and I want to live it happily, reminiscing on days of my childhood. As a teen, I want to lurk in the shadows with Cree and Abby, who we all know will get away. It's in the family, I guess. I think we'll be the only ones, watching over the Kids Next Door, maybe old friends or new faces.
Teenagers always seem out to get us.
I remember more than on occasion of Cree helping Abby.
And I swear, with every fiber of me, every atom, that I will do anything in my power…
To be her.
And then I can live happily ever after.
Just for now, though, this is enough.
The End
(A/N: I know, I know. It's a really short story. I'd first planned it to only be five chapters long, but the plot changed and I thought I'd be writing this for a lot longer, just because I like it so much. I guess I found the perfect ending though, because I love my story, now more than ever. I hope you enjoyed and please review if you like it and want a sequel or something….
Much Luch,
Lucky Koriand'r (but that's probably EmotionalNapsack to you. :P)
Thanks for reading!)