Now with normal spacing… I hope…
Disclaimer: Jack Sparrow, Will Turner, Elizabeth Swann, Black Pearl, Tortuga, or any other person or thing (excluding my OC's, and the basic plot of the story itself… if there is one), do not belong to me. Now excuse me, while I go and cry in the corner.
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Chapter 1
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Three steps right … no. Left. Right. Then one hundred long strides straight … No, that's wrong. Ten. Yes, ten. See? The Plan™, was perfect! Foolproof even. Jack Sparrow was absolutely sure, that there was supposed to be a big, high (not to mention wide), door that ever-so-often opened to reveal one of Jack's most favourite… ummm… inns?... bars?... rum-giving-places?
Whatever the society called it, the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow, settled on that last one, and pondered on the curious subject of 'Where did the door go?' Five minutes of pondering later, the nice random drunk man told Jack that the Rum-Giving-Place had closed due to the increased amount of violence, rudeness, and general evilness at the place.
Which was not helpful at all, since the fate of the door remained a mystery.
"But why the door?" Jack asked in the most confused and at the same time angry voice that he could muster, but the man had very rudely passed out.
Jack considered sitting down and crying. However! A sudden thought struck his sharp and 0.1 sober brain. This was Tortuga! T-u-r-t-i-u-h-a-h! Captain Sparrow even spelled it out. Obviously the door was stolen. But by whom?
Jack did not hesitate. He voiced his opinion in the loudest, drunkest, and most furious of voices. Yet no sound came out of Jack's widely open mouth. After two more minutes of pondering why was that, Jack decided that he was too drunk to ponder anymore.
Master Sparrow yawned, and leaned against the wall that suddenly appeared somewhere on one of his sides. He decided that the mystery of the door would be decided after a nice nap.
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Meanwhile, at least seven people who would later obscure and further complicate Captain Jack Sparrow's life appeared in Tortuga at almost the same exact time, and lost themselves amongst the 'town's' vivid population.
One of these people was a small boy, not more than five years old, with a headful of black curly hair and mischievous chocolate eyes. After bravely beating off the crowd of fawning women, who gathered around the young man on daily basis, the young lad went up to the passed out form of Jack Sparrow, and shook the drunk man alive. Once Jack was awake the boy cheerfully greeted him.
"Hi daddy!" was followed by an ear-splitting, almost maniacal looking grin.
Jack Sparrow once again passed out.
The lad let out an ear-splitting screech, which was assumed by the passer-byes as a laugh, and made a run for it, into the nearest, darkest alley. Unfortunately for him, the second character that would further obscure Jack's life, appeared out of the previously mentioned dark alley.
The boy once again screeched and began to run in the opposite direction, but the hands of this new mysterious character were too fast even for him.
"Musa, you moron," muttered the person in an evil, how-could-you-be-so-stupid, tone of voice. The mysterious character turned out to be not-so-mysterious after actually stepping out of the dark ally and showing her true face to the not-so-honest population of Tortuga.
She was a girl. That was mainly noted by the male audience. Her exceptionally curly black hair looked shiny, and she did not wear any make-up, all the while looking all the more pretty.
The female audience humphed and began their new strand of gossip about how "Women who aren't painted like whores have nothing to do in this town". The male audience ignored them.
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Accidentally, our chain of events seems to further itself, for an old man with a hood on his strangely crooked back, also took note of the girl with the boy in her hands. As she walked by him, keeping a fast and steady pace, the old man looked at her re-treating form.
Sighing heavily, he stood up and became not so crooked anymore. A few drunks and one whore stared at him for a moment, each thinking their own, and then dismissing it. Making sure the hood still covered his entire stature, the man began moving after the girl, desperately trying to match her speed. Unfortunately for him, that was not meant to be.
Characters four and five made their sudden appearances by jumping onto the unsuspecting, not-so-crooked old man. The result was a loud "Umph", and three figures falling onto the ground, and ultimately hurting themselves.
The 'other' result was rather interesting, for the not-so-crooked old man turned out to be not-that-old, but ironically quite young and handsome and blonde. The characters that caused the man's disturbance turned out to be female, red-haired, in their under-dresses and in a not-so-subtle position with the not-so-old-and-crooked man.
The two females jumped back up on their feet, blew a kiss to the rather confused, now young-and-handsome man, and with a laugh and "Maybe next time, honey," they were off and running. Where? Good question. Off into the horizon.
There is also the chance of them running away from that angry, old, bald man with a face closely resembling that of a crab (due to its peculiar red colouring). After all, he was screaming various profanities and furiously shaking his hands in a scary fashion, all the while attempting to chase the two red-heads. Failing miserably too.
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On their demanding quest to run off the angry bald man, the two strange females bumped into all kinds of strange people (and not only people), one of them being a rather miffled and partly confused Will Turner. Will was not in one of his best moods, so he joined the angry bald man in screaming colourful and vivid words at the running girls.
After finishing his little speech, Will slowly made his way in direction that the man and girls were running from, all the while brooding and looking into the crowd, obviously searching for someone.
He passed a very confused blond man sitting in the middle of the street looking baffled, and who a second later with an almost comical speed ran past Will in the direction that everyone seemed to be running that day. Including the girl with the insane kid.
Shrugging it off, Will continued on his way, still looking at the crowd, hoping desperately that he would find the person he was looking for. One thing for sure, he was not looking for a wench, since they were basically falling onto him, a thing that Will found flattering but disturbing.
Who Will, - was, - looking for, was none other than the currently drunk and napping Jack Sparrow. It took Will literally three steps, - he was counting, - to find the passed out man, lying on the ground. Which wasn't very hygienic, to tell the truth.
Making note to either dump a bucket of water on Jack, or do something equally dastardly later, Will made his way through the crowd with every intention to pour all his newly married man's miseries onto the unsuspecting Captain.
When Will reached his destination, he took one look at Jack and decided that the only way to awaken his troubled friend was to slap him a couple of times. It wasn't really, but Will found joy in slapping people, so that was what he did.
When Jack using the strength of every single muscle in his body, rolled his kohl-lined eyes open, instead of Will's handsome face, he saw a floating bottle of rum.
"Come here luv," Jack muttered and gave Will (a.k.a. Floating Bottle of Rum), a nice, friendly hug.
Then he passed out, for the third time that day.
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Will was confused. After some uncertain amount of time dedicated to his confusion, Will decided that Jack was absolutely, undoubtedly drunk, and that the other man would not be a good conversant. Atleast until presented with a chance to get drunk even more than he already was.
It didn't really make sense, but everyone, - except for extremely boring people, - knew that most of the things associated with Captain Jack Sparrow didn't make sense. Same principle applied to rum: If you give it to normal people – they get drunk and extremely confused; If you give rum to Jack – he becomes undrunk and strangely coherent.
And so, the young man took one of Jack Sparrows arms, and slung it over his left shoulder. Slowly standing up and holding up the drunk man with his left arm, Will's thoughts trailed away for a second in the direction of the young Miss Swan, he had left in Port Royal.
Will, with Jack draped over his shoulder , made his way through the crowded streets of Tortuga, to the nearest inn that entertained their visitors with ungodly amounts of rum. That said inn being across the street. Will was so preoccupied with his thoughts, that he hadn't even realized that he was, in fact, person number six, to bring disturbance into Captain Sparrow's life.
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As the two men made their way through the doors of "The Three Drunk Pigs" inn, a strange figure, clad in a black cloak watched over them. The figure made her way in the same direction, and humphed to herself in obvious distaste as she did so.
The figure being character number seven was despicably furious in her nature. She pushed through the crowd, and entered through the doors of the inn, searching for one extremely foolish Will Turner. Once she found him, - busy forcing an ever-so-grateful Jack into drinking more rum, - she skulked her way over to the two unsuspecting men, with evil intentions in her vengeful mind.
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The strange line of fateful, foreshadowing events that night ended, and all the better. Will and Jack wound up extremely drunk. Jack, because it was his usual habit, and Will because a none-too-happy Mrs. Elizabeth Turner fell like a bottle of rum on his head. Painful, - yet he was strangely grateful.
How she found him in Tortuga? That would be the question of the year… In any case, she found him, slapped him, and stalked off somewhere; Jack could have sworn he had seen steam coming out of Elizabeth's ears. Maybe, she even stalked off in the same direction as all of the previously mentioned strange people seemed to be going that day.
Will was sure that he would have a red palm mark on his face for the rest of his life. A peaceful smile made its way onto Will's handsome face, right before he fell face first onto the table, happily giving in to the calming darkness of slumber.
TBC…
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Why did Will run away from Elizabeth? What role could an insane five-year-old have in a story? What could this fateful chain of events lead to? Where the hell is this story going? When will I find something productive to do with my summer break time?
All these questions and more shall be answered in the next chapter.
If I get off my lazy ass, and actually write.
'Till next time! B-Bye!