Go On

Messages of Love

Disclaimer: I own no one except Rhiannon!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Until the custody papers had come in, John Cena had been on the road to recovery. He had finally allowed himself to lower the barrier around his heart. He finally allowed himself to love again.

Now, he was slowly going mad.

In the dark of night, he swore he saw Randy out of the corner of his eye. In the wind, he swore he heard Randy's voice, telling him everything was going to be alright. Dark roses appeared in odd places. Roses had always been a sign of Randy's love for John.

Some days, John was fine. Other days, he knew there was no way he was seeing his dead husband and he was obviously going mad.

"Lance, if I tell you something, do you promise not to laugh and say I'm crazy?" John asked, watching Rhiannon write in her journal. She sat under a huge elm tree. His head was in Lance's lap.

"Of course," Lance said. He knew John was under a great deal of stress, and just needed to talk.

"I think I'm going crazy," he muttered. Lance glanced down at him.

"Why do you say that?" he asked, watching Rhiannon. Over the fence, he could see Chris playing with Lian. It was a surreal scene. A typical early evening in a typical neighborhood.

"At night, I see Randy. I don't get a very good look at him, and it's just out of the corner of my eye. When the wind blows, I swear I hear his voice. I'm seeing dark roses everywhere. What is wrong with me?" John asked. He truly thought he was crazy. A leave landed on the porch. Lance sighed.

"Thank you for proving my point," he murmured. John glanced up at him. Who was he talking to? Had Lance gone crazy?

"Who are you talking to?" John asked. Lance sighed. He knew this was going to be an interesting concept to explain.

"Darrin. He's always around." Lance said. John nodded. That made sense to a degree. "You and Randy had roses. Darrin and I had leaves. It was a joke. I hated raking leaves. Everytime I'd rake them, they'd just pile back up again. So, when we started dating, he asked me the chore I hate to do. I said 'raking leaves'. As a joke on our next date, he gave me a leaf. He called it a token of love. From then on, if we had a stupid argument, one of us would inevitably give a leaf to the other. The day he died was the day the trees shed their leaves. I never figured out if that was just a coincidence. All I know is I find leaves in the strangest locations. In the car when there isn't a tree in sight. On my pillow. I truly believe when the ones we love die, they try to show us they still love us,"

"Are you trying to tell me Randy's trying to tell me everything's going to be alright?"John asked. Lance nodded. It seemed odd in logic. In theory, it made sense.

John got up and ran up to his room. The letter Trish had given him a month prior remained unopened. Now was a perfect time to open it.

Sitting on the bed, he slit it open and silently began to read.

12/25/09

Dear John,

Merry Christmas, Babe. You have gone home to spend Christmas with Rhiannon, just like I wanted you to. She deserves to have one of us with her on Christmas morning. I am in the hospital, with another case of pneumonia. This sucks.

I'm trying to get all my finances and what not in order. I don't have much longer. I'm not afraid to die. Death is only a new adventure.

If you're reading this, it means I am gone and you have fallen in love again. I have asked Trish to hold this letter until that time.

Babe, I wanted you happy in life. I know you're probably miserable after my death. I never wanted to see you like this. Please allow yourself to love again.

Life will be a struggle. I know you, C. You'll be able to survive the struggle, even when things seem impossible. When things seemed impossible, you took my hand and walked me through the struggle. I will love you forever, for all you've ever done for me.

I want you happy after my passing. I want Rhiannon happy after my passing. Don't be afraid to love again. Love is a great emotion that fuels the world.

Be happy. Let your heart loose. I love you, Babe.

Love,

Randy

John shook his head. Even after death, Randy was helping him cope with the strain of the world.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Leaves from nowhere, roses everywhere. Hopefully, I didn't offend anyone by using supernatural elements, Hope you enjoyed it!

JenLea

Read, Review but most of all...ENJOY!