Go On
Memories, and Conversation
Disclaimer: I own no one!
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Rhiannon slowly walked through the cemetery. John and Lance kept their distance behind her. They knew this was her time to be with Papa.
"What do you think?" John asked, watching her sit beside Randy's grave. Lance sighed.
"I think she realizes this will be the last time she can see Papa's grave before we head back," Lance replied. He slipped his arm around John's waist and lovingly laid his head on his shoulder.
Watching her parents, Rhiannon shook her head. She loved watching them together. Yet, like any normal ten-year-old, she was mildly disgusted by the thought of sex and romance.
"Papa, it's Rhia." she said, speaking to the grave. "You've been gone five years. Two weeks ago, you would have turned thirty-five. I turned ten." She sighed. Talking to a gravestone wasn't as good as talking to the real person.
"We're more alike than we realize," John murmured, realizing she was talking to the stone. "I do the same thing."
Rhiannon never believed in psychics. If they could contact the dead, why did they only do it for people they knew?
"I wish I remembered more of you," she murmured, slowly tracing the engraved letters with her index finger. A cold wind blew through the cemetery. Rhiannon closed her eyes, to shield the onset of dirt. Then, she began to remember.
Papa!
What did you say, Rhiannon?
Papa!
How could she be remembering this? She had only been thirteen months old!
Randy, she's two years old. That dog's bigger than her!
Come on, John. She's a purebred St. Bernard. Rhiannon will love her.
I don't know.
Come on! The St. Bernard is the most gentle breed of dog.
What's her name?
Bernie!
Retreating deep into her memory, she found the vaguest shadow of
having a large dog when she was younger. She was still stunned that she was remembering this.
Daddy, where's Papa?
He's in Heaven, Princess. Remember?
Where's Heaven? Can we go visit him? I'm sure he misses us!
No, Baby. We can't visit Heaven.
Rhiannon recalled the feelings of abandonment. For the first few weeks after Randy's death, she had been angry, unable to understand why Papa had gone away.
"Papa, since Daddy started seeing Uncle Lance, I've been keeping a journal. I've been writing letters to you, to discuss what's been going on in my life," she said, opening her eyes. Turning to her latest letter, she began to read out loud.
4/10/15
Dear Papa,
You have been gone five years, three months and twenty-five days. It seems like so long ago that you would pick me, and tell how you would never leave me.
The past month and a half have been pure hell. Your father tried to take me from Daddy and Uncle Lance. He tried to make me hate them. I can never forgive him for what he did to you. Don't be upset.
I miss you. I miss how carefree you made life.
Daddy and Uncle Lance are falling in love. I find it kind of disgusting, but that's only because they're always holding hands and being mushy. Yuck!
I'm not going to lie. Sometimes, I wonder what life would be like if you had never died. Would we still live in Massachusetts? Would we have moved back to New York?
I love you, Papa. I know one day we'll meet again. Thank you for being my guardian angel.
Love always,
Rhiannon
Writing letters to Randy was her way of coping with the world around
her. He was always there. He made the perfect penpal, despite the fact he couldn't write back.
"Daddy, do you think Papa can see us?" Rhiannon asked, squeezing between John and Lance. John glanced over to Lance. Rhiannon always seemed to ask the questions with no real answer.
"Of course, Sweetie. Papa is everywhere you can think of. The sun, the sky," John replied.
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Okay, just to fill you in. The next chapter will be the final one. I have chapter 1 of Close to You finished. Hope you enjoyed it!
-JenLea
Read, Review but most of all...ENJOY!