Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia
A/N: I'm not thrilled with how this turned out but, it'll have to do until I have time to upload more stuff… please R&R!
Alone
I sat on the side of my bed my elbows on my knees and my fingers threaded through my unkempt hair. I stared at one spot on the floor in font of me not blinking. Reliving the most nauseating, deplorable event of my life.
That bastard Kvar. He'd taken away the only things I'd ever held dear to me. Anna... my Anna. Lloyd... our Lloyd. I felt sick. I rolled over onto the bed and closed my eyes, wishing I could just die there. Their faces haunted my mind. My hand hung over the side of the bed. I half expected Noishe to come and lick it comfortingly but, no, even he was taken from me.
My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. I didn't care. I was mildly surprised when I heard the door creak open without me giving my consent. I didn't look to see who it was. I really didn't care, that is until I heard the voice of an old friend.
"So Kratos, this is where you guys have gotten to." His voice annoyed me slightly. I resumed my position on the edge of the bed so as I could look at him properly.
"What the hell do you want?" I snapped. The man shrugged, "I just came to check on you and everybody." That hurt. He had no idea what he was saying. He must have seen my expression change for his turned to one of puzzlement, "What's with you?"
"Yuan, don't tell me Yggdrasil hasn't told you." Yuan's expression turned to one of concern.
"Kratos, what hasn't Yggdrasil told me?" Yuan looked around, I knew he was looking for any sign of Anna or Lloyd.
"Kratos?" Yuan asked gently with concern, "Where's Anna?"
"Dead" I said quietly. I watched as Yuan's face turned to horror.
"And Lloyd?" he asked though I was certain he already knew the answer. I couldn't bring myself to repeat that wretched word. I simply nodded. Yuan brought his hand up to his forehead pushing his blue hair back.
"Oh, gods," he whispered, "Kratos... I'm so sorry... really, I didn't know."
I sighed and ignored him.
"Kratos? How long have you been here?" Yuan asked in his concerned tone. I shrugged. Truth be told I didn't know if it was a few weeks or a few months. All I new was that time had stopped for me at the moment I...
"You want to... err... go get a drink or something?" I knew he was trying to cheer me up, but I simply didn't care anymore. I shook my head. He sat down on the edge of the bed beside me. He fiddled with the ring around his left ring finger. I knew he was thinking of Martel. So this was how he had felt all those thousands of years ago. Like a black hole had ripped into his soul sucking out all joy and the happiness he'd experienced for a short time in his long life.
"Come on Kratos," Yuan implored cutting off my thoughts, "let's go for a walk or something... anything... you've got to get out of this room... I've been here before... I know what you're going through... laying around here for the rest of your life isn't going to change anything."
I glared at him. I didn't want to move from this bed. I didn't care what he said. It wasn't worth it. Not any more. Yuan looked pittingly at me.
"I'll tell Yggdrasil to leave you alone," Yuan said somberly.
"I'd appreciate that," I sighed surpressing my resurfaced anger towards Mithos. As far as I could see this was his fault. He was the one that couldn't keep control of his minions, he's the one who wanted to research Cruxis Crystals in the first place.
I vaugly acknowledged that Yuan had gotten up as I heard the door creaking close. I couldn't help thinking to myself that he was right. After a few moments of staring off into space I mustered enough energy to rise from the bed. I grabbed my cloak and trudged out the door.
As I stepped out into the streets of Triet my mind vaugly registered it was nightfall. Stars were beging to appear overhead. I sighed heavily, looking around. I had no idea where I was going to go. The thought crossed my mind to trek into the desert and see how long I could last without food or water. This seemed very appealing to me. I started towards the gates of Triet but, stopped when I heard my name.
"Kratos!" I turned to see Yuan. Damn, what does he want now? I thought bitterly. I wasn't in the mood for anymore conversation.
"I thought you might take my advice," He informed me. I bet you did.
"Damn it, Yuan, I'm not in the mood." My mind began racing once again with thoughts of my family. I wanted to escape from it. Stop the pain. I suddenly realized I was clenching and unclenching my fists, my rage, frustration and loss getting the better of me. Yuan seemed to notice as well.
"Look, I'm your friend. If it were up to me I'd leave you alone but, Mithos won't have you hanging around here in this condition. He says I am to make sure you don't do anything stupid until..."
"Until he comes to take me back to Derris-Kharlan," I finnished for him suspecting that Yuan had only left to report to Mithos. Mithos, that little snot-nosed brat. Damn him. I knew he didn't want to protect me. No, not me. He wanted to protect Origin's seal.
"So what am I supposed to do now? I hate it here on this earth. Everything reminds me of them... everything." I felt my throat contract and my eyes watering. I looked away ashamed for Yuan to see me crying. Yuan looked down sorrowfuly. The man I would've called my brother many years ago had become merely an aquaintance. Too much time had past.
"Look," he spoke gently his mind seemed to have traveled somewhat in the same direction as mine for he continued, "we were best friends all those years ago. You supported me when I lost Martel. I guess I sort of owe you."
I looked up at the night sky. More stars had appeared now. I thought of Lloyd and how we used to star gaze together. I felt my heart sink as emotions swept over me. My sadness, my greif and the frightning feeling of being alone, being lost. No family. No one to really call my friend. I was completely isolated from every other living being on any world. I shuddered as I realized just how alone I really was.