so GET OFF MY BACK!
Trigun: Randomity!
Chapter 2 - I'm a poet and I didn't even know it!
One day, while sitting on the couch, Vash was very bored, so he decided to think of a game to play, and while everyone around him didn't want to play, he made them play anyway!
He decided to rhyme, to rhyme all the time, so now he would never get bored. Oh lord.
"What is for dinner?
I'm hope I'm the lottery winner!" asked Vash.
"What is wrong with you Vash? Do you have a bad rash?" asked Meryl.
"I do not know, for this morning I stubbed my toe!" Replied Vash
Meryl mouthed in response, "You do not make sense,
Did you stub your toe on the neighbor's fence?"
"No, I stubbed my toe, on a hoe."
"The kind of hoe who's dirty and skanky,
Or the one that looks like… my blankie?" Said Meryl, holding up her blue blankie.
VASH: "You are a bad rhymer,
I am good,
I hope my toast does not taste like wood."
"I made it myself,
Are you saying my cooking, is not very good-looking?"
"No I am not,
Dear meryl of mine,
Could you get me a napkin?
To help me dine?"
"No,
You lazy buffoon,
I will not get you that napkin,
You crazy loon."
"You finally got the hang,
Did you know wolfwood has a fang?"
"What the hell did you say?
Look at that dog,
He's taking a 'spray.'"
"Welcome to life,
my lovely wife.
We all have to spray,
Sometimes in the oddest times of day."
"Get it through your head Vash,
Or I'll turn that brain of yours into ash
We are not husband and wife,
Don't make me get my deadly butter-knife."
"You know you love me,
Who could not?
Look at me, I'm smokin hot."
"I would not want to insult you again,
But your butt looks like a hen,
That did not make sense,
For you didn't stub your toe on the neighbor's fence."
Then all the sudden, legato comes downstairs,
Lacking a lot of his blue hairs.
"Knives has gone crazy,
Just look at my head,
He just went to bed.
He never ceases to see,
Why everything just pees on me,
It's not what it sounds,
So just be quiet,
I hope I do not start a riot."
"Did you know you have maggots all over your head?"
"May I ask why you're eating a moldy piece of bread?"
"Yes,
I know,
For surely you would,
And let me tell you it does not taste that good"
"Then why are you eating it still?"
"I don't know,
I'm starting to feel ill."
"Take a chill pill."
"No thanks,
I do not like pills,
They make me ill,
Look,
There's kuroneko on the window sill,
Eating a mouse,
He looks as big as a house."
Just then Millie comes downstairs. Hair in all directions.
"This is not that funny stupid,
It ceases my laughs,
Let's juice it up a little,
So I'll be split in halves."
"Dear dear Millie,
Don't mind me,
Please excuse me for I have to pee,
Up on the rooftop,
Poo,
Poo,
Poo,
I stink bad and so do you."
"I am hungry,
As you see,
I've eaten a hole right through me.
Let's all go to one of them booger kings,
Where the fat people go to eat chicken wings."
Then they are all magically transferred to a burger king, where Knives magically appears as the cash-register dude, and is very rude.
"How may I help you today?
And may I ask why I never get my way,
Hey,
Look at that dog,
He's taking a spray."
"Yes kind sir,
I would like meat,
Lots of meat that smells like feet,
That makes me want to barf,
It bugs me all the time,
Hey look,
Here's a dime!"
"Oh, legato please get a cup,
Before I throw my breakfast up."
Everyone stares at her because what she said didn't make sense, and Vash didn't stub his toe on the neighbor's fence.
"What?
Why are you all looking at me?
I'm not doing anything out of the ordinary."
"That was stupid,
Can't you see?
Mr. Could you please wipe my pee?"
Everyone looks at him oddly.
"It's hard to rhyme, you meany people,
I wanna go home so I can sleeple."
"Look at you,
You are a fool,
Watch me dive into my grease pool."
Knives hops into a big grease pit, and instantly dissolves into a pair of eyes.
"This is weird,
But that's okay,
At least I don't have a beard."
Knives suddenly sprouts a beard.
"Life is cruel,
Just look at my greasy swimming-pool."
Wolfwood immediately takes the place of Knives.
"Hello,
I work for minimum wage,
That's what is says in the manual,
First page."
"Howdy Wolfwood,
How do you do?
Take a whiff,
I smell like poo."
Wolfwood cracks up.
"You know what,
This sure stinks,
More than your brain thinks,
Why did the author put this on me?"
I then magically appear in the store. I do not look like… a whore?
"Why dear Wolfwood,
Can't you see?
You are merely a slave to me,
You signed this contract,
Here is your sign,
Along with the rest of you,
You are all are mine."
"That is depressing,
Just look at me,
Hey mister,
You still haven't wiped up my pee"
"Hey,
Vash, you have issues,
Can someone get me a bunch of tissues?"
Meryl just then hands Wolfwood tissues, after he said Vash had issues.
"Thank you,
You did that just for me,
You finally wiped up my puddle'o'pee."
"Shut up you ass,
Before I turn your arm to brass."
"Don't you say that bout my arm."
Just then a bunch of bees swarm.
"Hah hah,
This is so funny,
So funny it's making me hop like a bunny."
"Knives,
May I please ask?
For you to answer my one task,
Why can you jump if you are eyes?
Are you the author…. in disguise?"
"How did you know?
You smart fellow,
Come on people, let's roast Legato like a big marshmallow!"
I suddenly poke a big stick into Legato's side, sticking it into the grease pit, turning Legato into bones.
"Hah hah!
I am so evil!"
"Excuse me you genus,
Can I have a piece of his-"
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP