Well this is my second attempt at fanfiction. My first didn't turn out so well……..so I deleted it. Yes, anyways. Please review and what not. Be honest not hurtful or I will personally chop off your fingers and feed them to Fluffy.

Um….this is in monolog form. As in just someone talking to no one. There are movement directions.

I apologize if this freaks anyone out. Or offends someone. Or conflicts with your view of Ginny Weasley. This is just how I've always thought of her.

Disclaimer: I REALLY hope that no one who reads this is stupid enough to need a reminder that I OWN NOTHING. But incase you do; everything belongs to J.K.R. and this plot/format has probably been done before. So….yeah.

Did I forget to mention that this is a one-shot?

And that the movement directions won't have proper grammar? And that the movements aren't professional, as in I am not using upstage or down stage or anything. And that I may not have perfect grammar because its someone talking.

Yes. Anyways, on to the fanfic

Well……Here it goes

(eyes down cast with hand in pockets)

No one knows how many times I've tried to do it.

(Looks up removes hands from pockets. Has a kitchen knife held loosely in right hand)

No one knows the number of nights that I've held the cold steel next to my wrist, making tiny incisions.

(Brings knife up and lays it against wrist. Looks down lovingly)

Just enough to break the skin. Only teasing, always teasing.

(makes a small cut, holds wrist up and watches blood trickle down, drops knife hand next to side, smiles)

Teasing myself with the possibilities.

(pauses)

Oh…The endless possibilities.

I could choose to end the torture now with one last, final cut and stop it all.

(drops hand to side, eyes grow cold)

Stop all of the fake smiles and false sympathy that makes me so sick.

So sick of life and living.

(eyes return to normal, shakes head)

Or I could choose to get myself help…as if.

(rolls eyes)

I would just be forced to talk with some old wind bag who doesn't know shit about anything and tell him or her all about my "tortured teenage soul".

(snorts)

What a cliché.

(takes out wand and twirls it)

I could just end it with a spell.

(pauses)

But where would be the fun it that?

(drops wand to the ground)

With a spell I would feel no pain.

Without pain how am I supposed to know of any change?

I mean, I'm already dead inside.

The pain just reminds me that my shell of a body is still breathing.

How would I know otherwise?

(looks surprised turns and spins in quick happy ballet way)

((A/N: I have no idea whet a ballet spin is called))

You know muggles were on to something with self mutilation.

(nods)

It's a mean of expressing yourself and your emotions, an art form, if you will.

(waves hand)

(pauses)

(frowns)

Though they lost me with that therapy shit.

(face gets neutral, eyes go cold)

Now that's no way of helping people. Believe me, I know. I had to endure a full summer of it after old Tommy boy possessed me.

(eyes get normal, smirks)

Now that was an experience to remember.

For once it my life I had felt free, free of responsibility, blame, obligations, restrictions.

You name it, I was free of it.

(holds up a hand)

Don't get me wrong, if I knew he was going to try and kill me I would have fought back.

(pauses, glances around)

Well, maybe not, that is if I had known that my heart would be trampled by

The-Boy-Who-Bloody-Won't-Die

(pauses)

God I can't believe I fell for that asshole

(shakes head regretfully)

But as much as it would help his ego, he is NOT the reason that I cut….No.

You see, most people cut because they care too much. They care too much about their looks, other people's opinions and about their lives. Those people never get far.

I cut because I don't seem to care enough.

So I see if I can get a reaction from myself by watching myself bleed

(Makes small cut on left wrist)

by watching as the knife digs in to my pale skin and buries itself deeper

(slices deeper)

and deeper

(slices)

in to my flesh.

So deep that I think I might just pass out from the pain. But the pain means nothing, NOTHING compared to all of the years of mental anguish I have suffered through.

(shakes head)

Nothing at all

Well that was my fan fic. You know hwat to do so please reveiw!