Chapter 4: GAH! THE GOVERNMENT!
Vash stood in front of the mirror, examining his armpit.
"Hmm, it seems as though this pit has more hair than the other one..." He said, staring at both his armpits suspiciously.
"ALRIGHT LEFTY-PIT, WHERE'S THE HAIR?" He said, pulling on the hair. "OW! Why'd you do that, Lefty-Pit?" Vash said, talking to his armpit as if it were a person, and not an armpit. "VASH!" Someone called from the shower, a man's voice, right next to Vash. "Where's the Herbal Essences shampoo"
"I don't Knives!" Said Vash, sniffing his armpit.
"Geez, Righty-Pit, don't you ever bathe?" He said, smelling his right armpit with distaste.
&
In the kitchen was Meryl and Millie, watching as Legato smelled his foot to see which one smelled worse.
"George, what do you think?" Said Legato, sticking his foot in his teddy-bear's face.
"Yeah, I think so, too." He replied.
"TIME FOR TELETUBBY BYE BYE!" Sounded off from the living room television, as they heard Wolfwood screaming. "AH, THIS IS...ER...THE PLAYBOY NETWORK...NOTHING STRANGE GOING ON HERE, NOPE...NOT AT ALL... OH LOOK! THE SUN'S GOT A BABY'S FACE...AAAAAAAA- I MEAN... EW COOTIES"
Everyone but Legato in the kitchen all stared wide-eyed at that sudden outburst, becoming more suspicious by the minute.
"So, what's this going to smell like?" Vash said, standing in the shower smelling a bottle of shampoo... with Knives in there with him.
"Let me smell!" Argued Knives, fighting over the shampoo bottle childishly, ignoring the fact that they were both butt naked and in the shower at the same time.
"Gee, Vash, I didn't know you had a Vagina..." Said Knives, suddenly looking down.
"NO I DON'T!" Screeched Vash, covering his lower half as best he could with his hands.
"Don't worry Vash, some men do... transexual men!" Knives said, cracking up.
"Knives," Began Vash. "Why is it that you only have one round thingy hanging behind that sausage-looking thing"
Knives immediately stopped laughing and stared accusingly at Vash.
"Shutup! All men have one ball"
"No they don't! You must be mutated! AAAAAAAAAAH! MUTATION! GET AWAY FROM ME"
"Well at least I don't have a Vagina"
"Well, that is worse, but right now, I'm just shocked about this discovery at the moment." Said Vash, then looking at his watch. "...and now...I'm done. SO? UNI-BALL"
"SO WHAT, THAT'S BETTER THAN HAVING A VAGINA"
"WELL, IT'S BETTER THAN BEING GAY!" At this comment, Knives looked thoroughly pissed, and then started glaring at his brother.
"WhotoldyoumeandLegatoareinarelationship?" He said in an outrage.
"You think I don't hear at night when the floor creaks to the rythym of your love-making!" Vash shuddered thinking of those nights. ONE OF THOSE NIGHTS
"OH KNIVES!" Rang Legato's voice throughout the night.
"SHAKE IT!" Said Knives' voice from another bedroom.
EEH-ER! EEH-ER! EEH-ER!
Vash lay stick straight in his bed, his eyes bulging outward.
"This better not be another one of those nights"
INSIDE THE BEDROOM
WHACK! A huge pillow socked Legato in the face and he fell backward on his ass.
"HA HA"
"WAAAAH HAAAH! KNIIIIIVES!" "WHAT? HUH! YOU WANT SOME MORE?" Screeched Knives competatively. Jumping on the bed, while whacking Legato in the head repeadetly.
"I just wanted a nice play time!" Said Legato, on the ground, while Knives jumped on the bed.
EEH-ER! EEH-ER!
"Vash, that was a pillow fight." Said Knives, truthfully.
"Sure..." Said Vash in a snooty tone.
"DON'T GIVE ME THAT TONE OF VOICE!" Said Knives, domineeringly.
"IT WAS JUST A LITTLE POT"
Just then, a message flickers on the screen.
"BROTHERS: The Anti-Drug"
Wolfwood watched the TV, while stuffing cheetos into his nostrils, and seeing if the craters where holy enough to get a sufficient amount of air to his lungs.
"GAH!" Said Wolfwood, in a airless voice... and then.
and then.
and then.
and then.
hedied.
IN THE KITCHEN
Harry Potter then popped out of nowhere and sat down at the dinner table.
"Is this London?" He asked, noticing the writing on Meryl's shirt "We lick it better in London, England"
"No, this is Gunsmoke"
"Oh, well, where's the gunsmoke?" asked Harry innocently.
"GO AWAY!" Screeched Millie, frosting Harry into an Ice Cube.
They then heard sirens in the background. "AAAAAAAAAH! THE GOVERNMENT!" Said Millie urgently.
"QUICK, HIDE HIM"
"OK!" Said Meryl calmly, and, without further or do, she put a table cloth on him, and a vase full of Daisies.
"There." She said, not noticing that it was obvious that he was there.
IN THE LIVING ROOM#
DING DONG! The doorbell sounded throughout the living room, and, Wolfwood then eagerly got up, remarkably, after being dead for approximately.
looks down at watch
20 minutes. "Hello." Said the police officer. "We're here to raid your house, because it's just common police-man business, to search other people's house for no apparent reason... yeah"
"Whatever." Said Wolfwood dully, letting the officer in. Carefully, the police officer sniffed the air suspiciously.
"hmm... " He stated simply, but maliciously, running into the swinging door of the kitchen and scaring the pants off of Meryl and Millie in the process.
"GAH!" Yelled the police officer. he had found out.
"I CAN EXPLAIN...SHEMADEMEDOIT...IT'SNOTMYFAULT..." Both girls sounded off at the same time.
"You have a mustache!" Said the police officer, pointing to Meryl's handlebar.
"Good day, girls, wait a minute..." Both girls were sweating koalas as he searched the kitchen.
"AH HA!" "CHIA PETS"
"WHAT! We both sweat Koalas and such to find out we're getting let off easy"
"'Fraid so..." Said the Police Man, dashing out of the house to the beat of the 'Cops' theme song. "Well, that was enough of an adventure for me..." Said Meryl, tiredly.
Just then, Vash came down the stairs into the kitchen, and then sits at the table.
"Meryl, do men have vaginas"
FIN