Where Do I Turn?
Disclaimer: 7th Heaven and the characters are all property of The WB and Paramount Home Entertainment. I in no way claim to own any right to the stories or story linesdealing with or in the show. I just like writing fanficiton and 7th Heaven is one of my fave shows.
Note: This fanfiction will be jumping from scene to scene, so instead of being really complicated I'm breaking each scene up into chapters.
Dear God
Simon stopped walking when he got to the front of his dad's church. He could feel the tears on this face. They were cold. He opened up the doors and walked inside.
Inside, Simon saw the place where his dad stood every sunday morning. He missed being able to come here and watch his dad give his sermon.
"The little things I took for granted. Thinking the world was passing me by. What a joke. I can catch up with the world. I just need to give it a try!" Simon thought to himself. He realized then how much he missed being able to sit with his family sunday mornings. He realized how much he missed piling into the car when they were heading home. But most of all, he realized he missed being able to be the one the family could turn to. The one who could help raise the family up when they were down. He missed being the funny guy who always put a smile on everyone's face when they needed it. Most of all, he missed being in his loving family where he could always give, and recieve support when he need too.
"That's it, I'm gonna change my life!" Simon thought as he slipped into the nearest pew.
Simon folded his hands and looked towards the sky. "God. I know I haven't talked to You in a long while. I feel bad about that. You've been there for me so much You know. I haven't been able to give my thanks back to You. Right now I want to start. I want to go back so early as when mom and dad told me I wasn't allowed to have a dog. They told me if one wandered into the yard I could have it. So I prayed to You to just let a dog wander into the yard, and I got Happy. You know, I've been really thankful for that ever since, even though I never stopped to tell You. I'm sure You've known though because it's like my dad says, You know all about us.
Also, I just want to know if there's anyway that You can forgive me? I really need to be forgiven by someone. I know my family is always there to forgive me, but that's what a family is for. I just need to know that You, the big guy, is going to forgive me.
And about the cutting thing. I promise I'll stop that. You know, it just numbed the pain of all my problems. It may have hurt to have my wrist bleed, but my other problems fadded for a while. But I just pray to You that You'll help me stop that. I'm really looking forward to You helping me with these problems." Simon shifted in his seat. He really felt that he was getting somewhere.
"Oh, and the drugs. I'm totally done with those. I do realize that You are going to help me with these problems of mine and when You do, I won't need to use drugs to block out all my worries and cares. They made me feel so good at the time. But the after effects were so bad! God, I know that the after effects from You aren't at all like that.
And about this STD. I just pray to You that it's not true. I do understand that I slept with a girl with a STD, but I just pray that You'll intervene somewhere. That I won't have a STD and that it was just all a big misunderstanding.
Also, I want to pray for my sister Mary" a tear fell from Simon's eye. "She's been a great sister and I don't understand why this had to happen to her. I guess the saying is true, bad stuff happens to great people. If anyone knows how great Mary is, it's me.
And Lucy, and the twins. Ruthie, Matt, Martin and Kevin. All of them, they've been so great in my life and I realize that they've all tried to help me in ways I can't explain.
Lastly, I wanna pray for my mom and dad. They raised me up great. They did a wonderful job with all of us kids, I just don't understand why my life had to turn. It's not the way they raised me and I just want to get back on track. So God, that's my prayer. Help my life get back on track! I know You can do it!"
Simon sat in the pew a few minutes. He had tears running down his face. After a while Simon stood up to leave. When he turned he saw that Mary was in the doorway of the church. She had followed him here. He noticed she also had tears in her eyes.
Mary ran to Simon with her arms outstretched. She hugged him tight. "Simon, I miss the old you too. I miss the old me. I miss the old family. I miss the way everything was."
"Mary, it's all gonna change. I talked to Him and He's gonna change it. Have faith. Our lives will start to get better!" Simon smiled as Mary loosned her grip from around Simon. "C'Mon, we need to get home. Mom and dad are probably looking for us by now."
"Yeah, they'll know you're gone when dad realizes that you have his C.D on. He knows you don't listen to that kinda music" Mary giggled.
"I think it's about time I start putting a bit of inspiration in my life" Simon said. Simon and Mary walked out of the church and headed home. They now knew things were going to get better!