Martha had just finished doing the morning chores when there was a knock on the front door, she sighed I swear she thought to herself as she weaved her way in and out of the furniture if that's another banker trying to get hold of the farm, I am going to scream. She promised herself, but then she saw the shadow of the man at the door. Bill Ross was leaning up against the door post.
"Bill!" Martha smiled involuntarily; it was nice to see a friendly face during this hard time. "Come on in"
"Hello Martha," Bill opened the screen door, "I was wondering if you needed any help doing the heavy chores."
"I have everything under control right now, but thanks for the offer Bill," Martha walked back into the living room, Bill close on her heels, and sat down. Bill sat down also
"I thought you might need some help, what with Jonathan in the hospital, how is he by the way?"
"Still unconscious." Martha said, trying to keep her voice from shaking, "I visit him every day, sometimes I feel he's close, close enough to reach out and touch, then a second later he's far away and I can't even see him, much less touch him."
"I'm sorry," Bill rubbed her shoulder gently.
Martha laughed bitterly, "You and the rest of the world Bill."
"Well the rest of the world doesn't know your family like ours does Martha," he told her.
If only you knew us Bill, if only you knew what our family was really like. She thought.
"Have you heard from Clark?" Bill asked after minute's silence.
"No I haven't, but I know I'll hear from him soon," Martha rattled off the answer she'd given everyone else whenever they asked the same question.
"Do you really believe that?" Bill asked lifting an eyebrow.
Martha glared at him, her hands tightening in her lap "Yes Bill" her voice was even and clear as she spoke, "I do believe it, and if you don't then I don't think you know Clark as well as you boast you do."
Bill gulped as he saw the glare on Martha's face, it was like a volcano ready to erupt, and Bill figured he should get to higher ground. "Has your father offered any help?"
At this Martha sighed again, "No, and I'm not going to go groveling back to him, it's what he wants."
Bill took in a deep breath, as if preparing to dive under water, "Well, maybe you should ask him for help," the glare again, "I don't mean begging him," he quickly tried to make amends. "I just mean asking him for help with some of the farm expenses which would then free up some money for Jonathan's hospital…."
"Insurance is covering most of the hospital bills," Martha interrupted, she quickly sighed then stood up, "Thanks for coming by Bill, I appreciate your offer to help, right now I really have to get to the hospital to see Jonathan"
Bill got up also, "If you ever need help, don't hesitate…"
"I appreciate your willingness to help out," Martha interrupted again as she made her way to the front door and opened it, Bill walked outside, blinking in the bright light, "Bye Martha remember…"
"Bye" Martha cut him short for a third time and shut the door in his face, a few seconds later she saw Bill's shadow move away from the door and to his car.
Martha sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day and leaned up against the door frame, letting tears flood her eyes. Then she sighed again, but this time she was determined not to cry. Crying meant you had lost hope and that hadn't happened yet, it never would. She straightened, determined to get to the hospital and check up on her husband.
Then she staggered, she knew she couldn't go to the hospital, she'd probably get a room of her own to sleep in and even more hospital bills then there already are she thought bitterly as she made her way to the stairs intent on getting some sleep. She was nearly to the top of the stairs when memories washed over her.
"Jonathan!" Martha laughed as he led her blindfolded up the stairs "What are you doing?"
"You'll see Martha" Jonathan was also laughing, but more at her reaction to the situation then at her directly.
"I don't like being in the dark Jonathan" Martha was nearly wheezing at this point, one second she had been doing laundry, the next she was blindfolded and the 'threat' of "stay quiet and you'll get a wonderful surprise" was being breathed into her ear.
"It's only for another couple of second's honey" they had finally reached the top of the stairs and were walking down the hallway.
"Turn" Jonathan directed while opening a door and guiding her through it.
"Could you take this infernal blindfold off?" Martha asked as he stopped her and stepped away "It's messing up my hair!"
"Oh dear! If one hair is out of place I'll simply die!" Jonathan's voice went into a high falsetto as he wrapped his arms around her and finally took the blindfold off.
'Thank you" Martha pretended to grump.
"You're not really angry," he teased nuzzling her neck and ticking her ribs, she squealed and tried to back away but he kept his arms firmly around her. "You're not going anywhere missy." He laughed right along with her.
Then he backed away and let her see the bedroom, there where tulips everywhere, on the dresser, on her pillow, one was even on the window sill.
"Oh Jonathan" Martha breathed taking it all in, breathing in the sweet fragrance "It's beautiful."
"Happy anniversary," Jonathan wrapped his arms around her from behind and rocked from heel to heel.
Martha was confused, "It's not December," she said, "It's August."
"I know, but in late August a certain gorgeous red-head walked up to a certain blonde and asked if she could borrow his notes."
Martha breathed in a soft sigh as she looked up at her husband, love and wonder dancing in her blue eyes.
"The anniversary of the day we met," he finished looking into her eyes, as if memorizing every detail.
"Happy anniversary baby." He whispered leaning down to kiss her.
A bird cawing outside the window snapped Martha out of her reverie she stepped up the last couple of stairs and went into her bedroom. She immediately flopped down on the bed, spread eagle and was asleep even before her head touched the pillows.
"Martha, Martha wake up," she heard a voice whisper, she cracked one eye open.
"Jonathan?" she whispered, breathless with relief.
"I'm back baby," he whispered brushing a strand of hair behind her shoulder and cupping her chin in his hand.
"You're even more beautiful then when I last saw you," he whispered leaning down to kiss her, their lips met and Martha put her arms around Jonathan's neck.
"I've missed you so much," she whispered burying her head in his shoulder as she finally let 2 months worth of hidden tears fall freely.
"You can cry onto my shoulder for just a minute sweetie, I've got to get back to Clark" he said.
Martha looked up shocked, now her tears weren't only from relief they were tears of pain, "Jonathan," she whispered desperately, as if just saying his name would make him stay.
Tears filled his own blue eyes as he looked down at her swallowing hard to keep his voice steady "I can't come back to you baby" he answered her un-asked wish "Not yet, Clark is so close to coming home, I can't stop trying to get him to come back. I'll be here soon, Clark too, I promise. I hate being away from you Martha, its torture," he pressed a firm kiss to her lips and disappeared.
She woke slowly, blinking her eyes to clear the fog in her mind. Trying to hold onto the memory of the dream and trying to forget it at the same time. It took her a minute to realize she was crying her cheeks were wet as was the pillow beneath her. She got up and went to the bathroom, the instant she caught a glance of herself in the mirror she shuddered and turned away, she looked terrible.
There were mascara streaks all along her face, her other makeup was either smudged or trying to blend in with the mascara lines. She sighed and turned the shower on; she had to clean up before going to the hospital to visit Jonathan. As she was getting a new set of clothes her eyes caught sight of the clock, 9:30 PM too late to visit him today. She still got a new set of clothes out, wanting to take a shower and clean up.
She lifted an oversized plaid shirt of Jonathan's out of the dresser, held it up to her nose and breathed in. The scent came pouring into her nose like water from a faucet, hay, the cologne he used, tractor grease, fresh air and a scent that she couldn't place, one that was simply Jonathan she sighed and took a pair of pajama bottoms from her drawer and went into the bathroom.
Finally she climbed into bed again, this time however she was unable to sleep. After a couple of hours and no luck she got out of bed and went downstairs to the living room. Her eyes spotted the album she had been making before this nightmare had started.
She picked it up and opened it. She had forgotten where she had left off. She looked through years of old cards; finally she came to a card Jonathan had given her for their tenth anniversary she fingered the front, a simple picture of a single white tulip. Finally she opened it and re-read what Jonathan had written. Martha, I love you so much, and every day I fall in love with you all over again. Thank you for not giving up on me or the farm-Jonathan
The flood gates spilled over as Martha remembered what he had done that year, Clark had gone to Pete's house for a sleepover and they had had a night of dinner and dancing in the living room.
Martha whispered to the empty room, "Oh Jonathan, I don't know how much more of this I can take." The answer came almost immediately…you can Tulips, please don't give up on me.
Tulips, Jonathan's special nickname for her. "I won't give up on you Jonathan," she vowed out loud. No matter what I'm not going to give up on you, no matter how long it takes for you to regain consciousness.
She yawned, realizing how tired she was, she went back to bed and this time sleep claimed her.