"All day staring at the ceiling, making friends with shadows on my wall… All night hearing voices telling me that I should get some sleep because tomorrow might be good for something…"

:: Unwell:: Matchbox 20 ::

Chapter Four: This Side of Me

          

             

So, five minutes later we arrived at Miss Yukari Yvania Uchida's house of fashion. Her house, minus the exception of punk music that could be hear blaring from inside, looked similar to mine; old 1890's Victorian glory with cute gable and tea garden icing on top, a sense of fashion that all the other houses along with our street shared.

Anyways, I had just been attempting to rearrange my coiffeur back into order because I hadn't had time to brush it, when the front door burst open and a blur of safety pins, camouflage print, and pink hair promptly emerged and then tackled me.

"Hitomiiiii!! Imissedyousooooomuch!"

"Hi…Merle…" I panted; being hugged with enough force to crush all the bones in my chest, "Missed… you…"

The fifteen year old girl clad in a camouflage print mini-skirt and a clingy black tee shirt that had Cat Women's likeness on it, grinned, her smile painfully similar to that of her older brother Van's. She stepped back, looking me over from head to toe.

"You look like crap," She concluded, a playful smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

"So I hear," I looked past her to where Dilly was leaning in the doorframe. The silver haired boy simply winked at me, as Yukari's red head bobbed into view behind Dilly's muscular shoulder.

"Are you coming in?" My best friend demanded, "We've got a lot of work to do!"

I wrinkled my nose, sticking my tongue out at her, "Gee, thanks."

 "Don't touch that," Yukari snapped at Dilly as she riffled through her closet. Dilly had been looking quite curiously at the red-head's latest masterpiece; a painting who's subject look a great deal like a impressionist portrayal of Merle.

Dilly frowned, shoving his hands into the pockets of his baggy pants, a mock-pouting expression on his face as he sat down on Yukari's bed next to me, "It's not like I was going to give her a tail or anything."

Yukari just laughed, attempting, however, as discretely as possible to push her painting out of sight.

Merle emerged from Yukari's walk-in-closet, a small mountain of pastel colored fabrics in her arms, followed closely by Yukari who had another mound of sun dresses. Merle pushed her overnight bag off of Yukari's futon and they both dropped their loads unto it.

"Anything in particular 'Tomi? Or do you want to play dress-up?"  Merle asked distantly, rummaging through the pile.  

"How 'bout this one?" Yukari held up a white cotton gauze dress that had eyelet trim and spaghetti straps.

Merle squealed and grabbed it from the redhead, "I've been looking all over for this! I thought I had lost it! I wanted to wear it on my date with Chesta, but I couldn't find it anywhere!"

"Wait," my jaw dropped, "Chesta-Chesta? The pizza deliver boy? You went out on a date with Chesta!? When? Where was I? How come nobody tells me any of the good gossip!?"

Dilly groaned and rolled over, burying his head under Yukari's black pillow, "Someone kill me…"

Yukari giggled, and threw the sundress at me.

"Try it on in, we'll be waiting downstairs for the fashion show," She said, locking arms with Merle as they disappeared through the door.

I looked over at Dilly who had rolled over and was now staring at me with a lazy smile.

I cleared my throat, raising an eyebrow, "You too buddy."

"Oh," he sat up and moved towards the door, "Right."

I spun around in front of Yukari's full-length mirror after I had slipped the dress on over my head.

"You're going to be beautiful one day, Miss Hitomi, just like your mother!"

I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts and rid my self of my uncertainty, of this little, itty-bitty part of my heart that suddenly felt… bad… about running away.

 Millerna probably only wanted to have me back in NY to flaunt to all of her friends… and in Paris to impress Allen's family.

She was many things, my mother; a drop-dead gorgeous model, a horrible cook, a terrible flirt… but… she was my mother.

Aren't mothers and daughters supposed to have this deep emotional bond?

Why didn't I have one?

Wait… when did I even start to want one?

I frowned, and nervously twirled a single strand of hair between my fingers.

Maybe I should've tried talking things out with Millerna…?  

No.

I did the right thing.

Nothing short of fireworks would've gotten Millerna's attention to my unhappiness, and credit card fraud definitely qualified as that.

But… maybe I should've left a note at least on the kitchen counter… But would I've said?

Dear mommy and crazy blond man,

Taking recent events into full perspective, I have come to the conclusion that from henceforth I am going to be finically, emotionally, and grammatically independent from you. In other words, I'm running away from home and you'll never see me again.

Love,

Hitomi

PS: Please send my stuffed animals and PS2 to Daddy Dryden's house.

Running a hand through my short hair in frustration, I stood up, walking abruptly over to Yukari's memory wall.

She had started covering the wall the summer before I started visiting Dryden, and it was covered with photos and small objects from throughout her childhood and her teenage years. I stepped closer, hoping to calm myself.

One of the pictures showed me at 10 building a sand castle with my hair twisted up in pigtails. Another was of Amano sticking out his tongue out at Yukari and me as we sat on the swings at the park. There was Dilly playing with his first lighter. Merle hiding up in the branches of a tree to get away from Dilly's dog, Miss Sparkles (well, actually, it was Dilly's mom's dog but growing up Dilly was rarely seen apart from her). One taken last year at Van's house of me being swung around in circles by Van.

I reached out and touched Van's smiling face.

I didn't belong with Millerna and Allen. I belonged here.

I wonder what he was doing now…?

I followed the frenzy of war cries to the rec room in the basement of the Uchida household, unconsciously tugging on the hem of the dress. On Merle it had came down to just below her knees, but on me, thanks to the Kanzaki-Aston genes, came to a stop a few inches above my knees, showing off my long tanned legs.

Not exactly 'daddy's-little-girl' but at least it was something.

Merle and Yukari where sprawled across the floor going over the latest issue of Seventeen, while Dilly, and what sounded like someone else, where sitting out of sight on the far side of the couch playing a rather violent video game.

"Hey! You! Yeah, you! The ugly, green, and terminally unwashed thing! Come here and fight like a man!"

"Dieeeeee, boney thing! Dieeeeeeeeeee!"

Boys

"Ahem," I coughed, dropping a makeshift courtesy.

Merle and Yukari looked up, twin grins spreading across both of their faces as Dilly's silver head popped up from the other side of the couch, followed closely by the messy black one of Van Fanel.

'Game Over' flashed on the screen behind them as Dilly let out a low whistle.

"Niiiiice."

Van punched him in the arm.

I blushed, and scuffed my khaki colored flip-flop against the wood floor.

"Hey."

The raven-haired boy grinned lopsidedly at me.

"Hey."

A/N: ducks Alright, alright, before I get anything harmful thrown at me, Van's there to pick Merle up because she spent the night at Yukari's house. More Fanelage will ensue. Promise. I just need to get the fluff ball rolling, and the awkward teenage hormones will keep coming.

Stormyrose: I'm glad you like this so far, and thanks for reviewing!

Andreyla Dragon: Don't worry I won't stop now, baby dah de dadah! (Thanks for singing… Err… reviewing )

Dariel: ;; Maybe I should copyright 'Fanelage' and 'Mo LeMan' and make millions, eh? The italics at the beginning of the last chapter where part of a reoccurring nightmare/vision (hint: Remember in the series when Hitomi kept having that vision of falling into the dark scary abyss of no return, and the angel saves her…? Think along those lines… inserts scary foreboding music)

Niffer: sigh I love Dilly, so of course, Hitomi has to too… but in a platonic way because this is a VxH… yeah… thanks for reviewing!

MaboroshiTsuki: I'm glad you like this O-Great-And-Mighty-One bowbowbowbow (; Don't kill me, I couldn't resist…) … giggle Thanks for reviewing…

Onigiri Momoko: Like I said to Niffer,I love Dilly, so of course, Hitomi has to too… but in a platonic way because this is a VxH… All right, I'll get back to work… thanks for reviewing!

Dreamingofflyingaway: Grin I'm glad you like this so far, and thanks for reviewing!

dawnsama: I'm really bad at remembering to update… or even to write… I sat down this morning at the computer and was like 'Hey, I should write something' BAM! Here we are four hours and some odd minutes later with a new chapter… It's really sad. Well, Thanks for reviewing!

Kim: OO Yes ma'am goes back to writing

Burnt Ashes: wipes away fake tear Ya gotta love potato launchers. Thanks for reviewing!

Wink57CS: My brother built a potato launcher over the summer, and then he and some of his friends decided to launch potatoes and then try to catch with them needless to say, things didn't turn out how they planed.

CharlieTheOtakuNymph: ;; Glad to be of service.

hitomi-chan: Never fear! More Fanelage a la fluff is coming soon! Thanks for reviewing!

SabineballZ: The drug jokes where sort of an inside joke. I have a friend from NY and I always tease her about it because in movies based in NYC they show at least one person addicted to drugs. Well, anyways, thanks for reviewing!

jossi-31: Never fear! More Fanelage a la fluff is coming soon! Thanks for reviewing!

Grrl N: I had fun writing the conversation on the phone and the one with Dilly, and I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for reviewing!

snow blossoms: The entire confrontation is going to be a riot to write, and it should be coming up within the next two chapters… I think … thanks for reviewing!

Version 2

June 23, 2004