OMG, no one will believe it. An angsty story, from me… the angst hater. Angst makes me cry (I'm a pathetic wuss, I actually started crying while editing the story!) But yes, It's true. And worse… about my baby Ryou being tortured. I hate myself sometimes. This story was actually inspired by a friend of mine, and a song. I'll tell you about it at the end. This is all from Ryou Bakura's point of view. I think I'll go into depth describing the meanings behind this at the end of the story.
Do not enjoy.
Lil'
--After Story--
Gawd, why do I have to be such a pussy? Sitting here writing the end of the story, I'm crying, practically bawling my eyes out. See! I can't stand angst!
Ok everyone… the truth behind the story. The influences for this story were two things, my friend Melissa, and a song by Evanescence. Not many people will have heard this song I don't think… It's called Breathe No More. It's a beautiful and heart breaking song, and when writing this story, and I used the word shatter in the first line of the second paragraph, it reminded me of the song, and it came to be my inspiration. Here are the lyrics.
Breathe No More- Evanescence
I've been looking in the mirror for so long…
That I've come to believe my souls on the other side…
All… The little pieces falling, shatter.
Shards of me,
Too sharp to put back together.
Too small, to matter
But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces,
If I try to touch them,
And I bleed,
I bleed,
And I breathe,
No more.
Take a breathe,
And I try to draw from the spirits well..
Yet again,
You refuse to drink
Like a stubborn child
Oh I…
Lie to me,
Convince me that I've been sick forever
And all of this will make sense,
When I get better.
Though I know the difference,
Between myself, and my reflection
I just can't help but to wonder,
Which of us,
Do you love?
So I bleed…
I Bleed…
And I breathe…
No…
Bleed…
I bleed…
And I breathe,
No More.
I only really used the first verse as inspiration. But now you see where the image of the broken mirror came from.
Also, notice how the story jumps around a bit? Yes, I noticed the topic jumping, and the way tense seemed to change a bit. It's actually on purpose. This story is about Ryou, he's been shattered, his heart and soul broken into thousands of pieces. Which is why I've left the story a little disjointed. It's to represent how he's been broken.
Anyways, back to the true inspiration for this story. My friend Melissa. We go to school together. Melissa is the sweetest, kindest, most beautiful girl I have ever met. Her heart is worth it's weight in gold and diamonds. She's very popular, not like the pretty girl, that sits at the popular table. I mean really popular, as in she's friends with everyone, and I mean EVERYONE. You might think that's a good think… but from what I've seen it's not. Melissa might be friends with everyone, but everyone is not friends with eachother. They all want to spend time with her, they all share their secrets with her, they all trust her. And it's not always a good thing, sometimes it's a burden. A few of our mutual friends became suicidal about a year ago. Three of Melissa's oldest and best friends were in and out of hospital for months for slitting their wrists. Melissa, being the friend she was, helped them out, was a shoulder for them to lean on. She moved in with one of those friends, and stayed with the day and night to keep them away from everything sharp so they couldn't hurt themselves. I ended up not seeing her for weeks, and so called her to find out what was happening. During our conversation, she told me everything that had happened. The burden of her friends secrets had gotten too heavy, so she shared it with me. While talking, we somehow got onto the topic of caring, and I remember she said to me
"You know, it's been ages since anyone has asked how I am, and truly meant it. It's like no one cares" She sounded like she was about to cry. Soon after that, my parents made me hang up, and I didn't see or talk to Melissa for a while. Almost a week later, she came back to school. She seemed fine, smiling, hugging people, being cheery like she always is, but there were bags under her eyes, and as soon as I got her alone, I asked her how she was. And you know what… I'll never forget the look on her face when I asked her that. It's hard to describe that look, but the closest I can come is pain, relief and happiness. I think she almost cried… but that's the inspiration for this story.
How with one simple question, I showed Melissa I cared, and it reminded her that not everything in life is dark. Which is a particularly good thing, because she actually had the day, time, and everything planned out for killing herself.
But there you go, it's like the saying goes.
Smile, it could save someone's life.
And that's a whole TWO pages on the inspiration for this story! If you read it all, you're crazy!
Anyways…
I love you all, and remember lifes not always as bad as it may seem.
(-huggs-)
Lil'