Chapter Seven

Willow gazed lovingly into Tara's deep, rich brown eyes. This was the woman she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. The rest of the world could go to hell for all she cared at the moment. She was with Tara. Nothing else mattered.

Her bliss was interrupted by a sudden knocking on the downstairs door. It kept persisting and only got louder with each knock. Willow's face wrinkled into a frown as she glanced at the alarm clock on the table next to Tara. "Who could be knocking at this hour?" she complained as she rolled out of the bed. Clearly Buffy was showing no interest in answering the door.

Tara shrugged at Willow as she reached for a bathrobe. "It could be an emergency," she pointed out gently.

"Better be," Willow muttered as she put a bathrobe over her nude body. "If the world's not ending, I'm pissed," she added as she crossed the carpeted floor over to the door. Her pale hands grasped the cold, metal doorknob, and she slowly twisted it open.

"I'm coming," Willow called crossly down the stairs. She looked back at Tara. "You think we should wake Buffy?" she asked.

"You don't think she's already awake?" Tara asked curiously.

Willow nodded, considering the point, as she walked down the stairs in a somewhat rushed manner. She quickly adjusted her hair to make it somewhat decent before opening the door. "Xander?" she asked in slight annoyance. Her face then instantly turned to fear. "What is it?" she asked. "Where are Anya and the kids? Are they ok?"

Xander shrugged. "Who knows?" he asked as he stepped inside.

"What do you mean who knows?" Willow questioned him as she closed the door behind her. "Xander, why are you here?"

Xander sighed heavily as he walked over to the stairs, sitting down on the second one from the bottom. By this point Tara had joined them and was now standing a few steps above where Xander was sitting. "I screwed up," he said plainly. Guilt was present on his face. All he cared about at that moment was getting the woman he loved back to him. "I screwed up real bad."

"No, no," Willow said in an attempt at encouragement. "I'm sure whatever it is, it can be fixed."

Xander shook his head. "I don't think so."

"Well what is it?" Tara asked as she moved down one step. Her concern for Xander was obvious, and she placed a gentle, comforting hand on his left shoulder.

"You know the woman who's in charge of the new library, Beverly?" he asked.

"Only by name," Willow answered plainly. "Why?"

Xander drew in a deep breath. This was his mistake; he alone would have to confess to it and atone for it at all costs. The words had to escape from his mouth. "Well, she and I kinda…we kinda…there was the one time…actually the few times…I was stupid…she was there…she was nice…and I was real stupid."

Tara's mouth dropped open as she realized the truth behind Xander's words. The construction worker did not have to come out and say it. She understood. "Xander," she said with disappointment.

"I know," Xander exclaimed. "I'm a jerk, an ass. An ass who doesn't deserve anything. I should be shot somewhere, and my remains should be scattered all over the globe."

"Does Anya know?" Tara asked finally.

Xander nodded sadly. "All too well. It was an accident. I screwed up."

"So you still love her?" Tara asked.

"Yes, with all my heart," Xander answered truthfully. "Only her."

"Then how could you let this happen?" Tara asked him back. She wanted to help Xander as best she could, but she could not bring herself to look at him.

"I was stupid," Xander said again. "That's how." Anger and disappointment with himself filled his body. "I can't loose another great woman because of something stupid with a less important woman," he said solemnly. "I just can't. I need to correct this." He looked behind him at the redheaded witch, who had remained silent since his confession. "Willow, please," he begged. "You won Oz back after something like this. What did you say to him? What did you do?"

Willow shook her head. "That was different. Oz and I were dating. You and Anya are married with two beautiful children," she reminded him. "Our thing was only a simple kiss, not a hot and sweaty affair!"

"Willow, please," Xander begged again. "At least give me something."

"What do you want me to say?" Willow asked. She sighed, knowing she had to help Xander. He was, after all, one of her oldest and dearest friends. She could not bear to see him suffering, even if he did deserve it. "Give her some space. Let her cool her anger down before trying anything."

"What's all you got?" Xander asked.

Willow nodded for confirmation. "Blankets are in the linen closet. You can sleep on the couch," she told Xander as she and Tara began heading back to their room.