Hating Halloween
Summary: It's Halloween, Hiei and Kurama find out that Karasu has evidence of them being together and decides to blackmail them. Will Hiei get the guts to spill it to the gang himself? Or will there be wedding bells for Karasu and Kurama?
Genre: Humor, romance, parody (sort of),
Rated: M (rated just in case)
Warnings: yaoi, fluffy-ness, language, drug use, suggestive themes, OOC-ness (On Hiei's part), Kurama's gifts and plans O.o;
Parings: HxK (of course!), YoukoxHiei, YusukexKeiko, BotanxKuwabara, KuramaxKarasu (By force)
Spoilers: The fight between Kurama and Karasu in the Dark Tournament.
Disclaimer: I do not own YYH! So just drop it! (goes away to pout)
Chapter: 2. Interfearing with a demon's date
"I know exactly where to go." Hiei smiled, getting out from Kurama's arms. "Come on." Hiei grabbed his fox's hand and began to run excitedly toward town.
Kurama smiled at Hiei's eagerness, "Koi, where are you taking me?" he laughed.
"To the best place ever!" Hiei smirked, "You'll love it!" A moments later, they arrived at the most ritzy place in town.
"Hiei..." Kurama looked around in amazement. "You have to have a reservation..."
Hiei grinned at the reaction that he had pulled from his fox's face as he sat Kurama on a bench under a beautiful old tree. "Don't you worry your pretty little head." he said as he ran inside.
Kurama sat on the bench outside, admiring the scenes around him. When he heard two familar voices behind him.
Hiei walked into the ritzy place and ordered the waiter to prepare a giant private room. The waiter politefully explained that he had to have a reservation. Hiei smirked, thinking that the ningen might say that. "You don't understand. You see, I am one of the wealthiest people that you will ever lay your middle-class eyes upon."
Hiei smiled, and removed a few pure gold coins and placed them in the man's hands. "you may check their authenticity as you will, they're for the waiter whom will serve us. But if you need payed ahead of time-" Hiei pulled about two thousand dollars out of his pocket and shoved it in the man's hands. "There is more money in my pocket. Do you require more than two-thousand dollars?"
The man's eyes widened in surprise, he had been bribed before, by only in hundereds, not thousands and promising more. "N-no sir." If this kid had gold coins and thousands of dollars to just throw around, he didn't care if the kid was five, he was going to allow him entrance. "How many will that be for?"
"Two." Hiei smirked, his eyes glistening happily.
"Yes, sir." The man bowed. "I will prepare your places immedately."
Hiei handed the man a paper with what he wanted, "Will the accomadations that I require be met?"
The man looked them over and smiled, "With the best of our skill, sir."
"Very good. Thank you."
"No, thank you, sir."
Hiei departed, smiling triumphantly as he began to run back, eager to tell his koibito about his immediate success. "Kurama!" Hiei stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Yusuke and Kuwabara standing there. "What are you two doing here!"
Yusuke spoke first, "We wanted to appoligize, we had no idea you were asleep..."
Kuwabara nodded, "Yeah, sorry we accused you."
Kurama gave Hiei that look. Hiei nodded and sighed, "It's okay." he muttered.
Things were silent for a few uneasy moments, but Yusuke spoke up. "What are you guys doing outside this place?"
Hiei smirked, "About ready to go inside this place."
"WHAT?" Yusuke and Kuwabara yelled in usnion. "Man! Do you KNOW how EXPENSIVE that place is?" Yusuke exhaled in disbeleif.
"Yes." Hiei smiled at Kurama. Kurama smiled back, he knew that Hiei was telling him that it was all for him.
"How long have you had reservations?" Kuwabara asked.
"about 2 minutes." Hiei chuckled at their faces.
"But you CAN'T- it's UNHEARD OF to get in without at least a two week reservation!" Yusuke stammered.
"Yes, well. This is where Kurama has always wanted to go." Hiei smiled. "And I wasn't about to let 'unheard of' get in his way."
Kurama felt like his heart was going to explode! It was beating so fast! Hiei was SO romantic! He couldn't wait to get away from these two, so he could jump at Hiei's soft lips in gratitude.
"Well, are you lucky or what, Kurama?" Yusuke sighed.
Oh damn! He's laying the guilt trip! Hiei thought bitterly.
((Kurama!)) Hiei's desprate telepathic message came.
((Now, Hiei. You have to invite him, baby...))
((B-but Kurama! What about our date!))
((I'm sorry, sweetheart. They're excited. They've never been to a place like this before.))
((Neither have you or I...And I want this to be special. Can't we just take the damn kids to taco bell?))
((You already told them you were going here...))
Hiei sighed deeply. ((Okay, okay, they can come..)).
((Thank you so much, koi. I would have felt so guilty if we didn't invite them...))
((Yeah, I know...You and your damned guitly concious.)) Hiei smiled at Kurama jokingly.
They came out of their telepathic conversation, and Hiei looked at Yusuke and Kuwabara. "Would you guys like to eat with us?"
Yusuke and Kuwabara acted like they were thinking about it for a few moments, it didn't last long. "YEAH!"
Kurama smiled at Hiei. Hiei rolled his eyes and sighed, "I'm going to have to tell them four instead of two. Just BEHAVE yourselves! You remember what happened at Applebees..."
Kurama closed his eyes and shuddered at the thought of Yusuke grabbing the oar on the wall and demanding to know how they took it from Botan.
They all headed up to the entrance, Yusuke and Kuwabara running ahead of them. When they arrived at the door, the same man bowed when he layed eyes on Hiei. "Sir, is the redhead your date?"
Hiei blushed, that was on the paper. "N-no." Yusuke and Kuwabara laughed. "Actually, I have a few changes that need to be made."
The man handed Hiei a pen and the paper he had made. Hiei sighed heavily as he tore it into hundreds of shreads and looked at Kurama helplessly.
((Hiei, I'm SO sorry!))
((It's alright. We can save it for Valentines day...))
((I really am sorry.))
((Don't worry about it.))
"S-sir, I don't get it.." The man blinked. "You don't want anything that was on the paper?"
"Instead, I would like to seat four..." Hiei explained, motioning to Yusuke and Kuwabara.
The man understood completely. He realized that Hiei had run into some friends and they obviously didn't know of his relationship with the redhead. He had to get rid of anything couple-worthy. "I understand. I will remove what needs to be."
"Thank you." Hiei said as they all followed the man back to the room.
"I don't get it...what's the deal?" Kuwabara asked Yusuke.
"Don't worry about it. It's taken care of. That's all you need to know." Hiei spat bitterly, but then got a sad look from Kurama, and smiled like he was joking. He was going to have to stop being bitter! It was hurting his koibito's feelings. They walked into the room to see the waiter's quickly changing the chairs from the heart-shaped ones to the normal ones. Thank god that the two idiots were looking at the high celing. But, Kurama had noticed, and had tears welling up in his eyes.
((Don't cry!))
((Koi...))
((Yeah, I know.))
((You're so romantic...))
((Fox!))
"Hiei! Why are you BLUSHING?" Yuskue yelled at the top of his lungs.
"You ass! I'm not!" Hiei quickly covered. Kurama held back a giggle.
"Yes you are!"
"Am not, god-dammit!"
"You are too, shorty!"
"Excuse me, gentlemen, but your table is ready." The waiter from the beginning bailed Hiei out as Yusuke and Kuwabara quickly forgot about Hiei and ran to the table.
Hiei sighed in releif and smiled slightly at the guy in thanks. The guy just nodded. "Can I call you Jeffery?"
The waiter sweatdropped, "Uh...sure..."
Kurama blushed as he and Hiei headed over to the table. "Why? Everywhere we go, if you meet a ningen you like, you rename him..."
Hiei smirked, "Because that means he was named by a demon, and he's higher on every demon's list in the entire makai."
"Except yours..."
"What?"
"You like someone who was named by a human." Kurama smiled, reffering to himself.
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Hiei smiled back. But a frown crossed his face when he realized that the ningen had made no room for him and Kurama to sit next to each other. (A/N: Think of a rectangle table, with two chairs on each long side. Kuwabara and Yusuke are sitting on opposite sides. Sitting diagonal from each other.) However, Hiei didn't want to make it too obvious that he wanted to sit by Kurama. Hiei thought for a moment, but before he could say a word, Kurama spoke up.
"One of you change chairs. Me and Hiei are sitting across from each other." Kurama stated sternly, Kuwabara being scared into moving first. (A/N: so now, Kuwabara and Yusuke are sitting ACROSS from each other. As will Hiei and Kurama)
((Are you really that brave!))
((Well, they weren't going to let us sit by each other!))
((Yeah, but you could have been subtle...))
((Oops, sorry. heh.))
They finished their sitting arrangements and began to look at the menu. "You were going to take Kurama here? Alone? Just you two?" Yusuke questioned.
"Y-yes." Hiei stammered, afraid that they might be catching on.
"Not Shori? Or little Shuiichi?"
"No."
"You'd think if you two were going to eat together, it'd be at some cheap place...not a place like people go on their annevesery..."
Jeffery came and took their orders, then bowed and left.
"Speaking of which, who's paying?"
"Me." Hiei sighed.
"So, you were going to pay for his meal?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Isn't that kinda too much like a date?"
"NO!" Hiei and Kurama both yelled in panic at the same time.
"Okay, okay, jeeze. Just asking..." Yusuke stopped the twenty questions finally.
"Why's there a present on the table?" Kuwabara questioned the centerpiece.
"Oh, god..." Hiei blushed madly, "They didn't remove it..."
"What is it?"
"Something."
"What something?"
"Something..."
"What?"
"NONE OF YOUR BUSSNEISS!"
Kuwabara and Yusuke sweatdropped, "Who's it for?"
"someone..."
"Dammit Hiei!"
"It was for Kurama..." Hiei growled.
Kurama blushed, Yusuke and Kuwabara looked at each other in shock.
"FOR HIS BIRTHDAY!" Hiei quickly covered. "an early birthday present."
"But his birthday's not for another six mounths..."
"I SAID IT WAS EARLY!"
Kuwabara shurgged, "Why don't you open it, Kurama?"
"Yeah, open it!" Yusuke encourged.
"Uh..." Kurama looked at Hiei, Hiei rapidly shook his head.
"I don't think he should..." Hiei began.
"Why? Is it a bomb?" Kuwabara questioned, picking it up.
"No! idiot!" Hiei snapped.
"Is it like- underwear or something?" Yusuke asked, taking it from Kuwabara.
"N-no..." Hiei covered his face, he couldn't beleive the asses were passing around the sex toy he bought Kurama...
"Open it, Kurama!" Yusuke threw it to the fox, who caught it.
"Uh..." Kurama looked down at it...He knew that it was either something too romantic to deny, or something too sexual to deny.
"Don't, Kurama..." Hiei pleaded.
Kuwabara grabbed it from Kurama. "Well, tell us what it is, then."
"No!" Hiei snapped.
"Then we'll open it..." Kuwabara smiled.
"Don't you dare!"
"Oh, I'm thinking we should..." Yusuke nodded in agreement.
"Don't! Give it here!" Hiei reached for it in desperation, only to have it held away from him.
Yusuke began to remove the tie-bow slowly, he was prolonging it to make Hiei crack. Hiei shook in nervousness. "Could it be a vibrater?" Yusuke teased.
"NO! GIVE IT!" Hiei cried in desperation. Suddenly, Kurama stood up and swiped it away from Yusuke.
"I'm going to go open it. You and Kuwabara stay here. If Hiei doesn't want you in his bussneiss than I suggest you stay out of it." Kurama growled, his eyes flashing gold.
Kuwabara and Yusuke gulped, as the waiter sat their food down infront of them. Hiei and Kurama got up and headed toward the bathrooms.
Hiei and Kurama entered the bathrooms and let out a big sigh. "I'm sorry that happened, koi." Hiei said. "I thought they would have removed it..."
"It's okay." Kurama smiled, "Is it really an early birthday present?"
"No. Just a...um, halloween present, I guess."
"People don't really give gifts at halloween, but, okay." Kurama grinned as he unwrapped it. It was a pink sex toy lined in jewels: diamonds, rubies, emralds, crystals, and others. "mmmmmm...sexy..." Kurama licked his lips and kissed Hiei ravenously. "Thank you, koi...Maybe we can use it tomarrow night."
"Okay!" Hiei smiled, he wasn't one for waiting, but tomarrow was better than never. "I gotta take a piss before we go back out there. I sware, those assholes make me want to pull my hair out!"
"Oh, koi-" Kurama called sensually, Hiei turned around to see Kurama had rolled his sleeves up. "Can I give you aim?"
"What?" Hiei's eyes grew wide, he was so lucky no one was in here.
Kurama pushed Hiei into a stall and unbuckled his pants, letting them fall to the ground. "Now, no using your hands, you put your hands behind your back."
"B-but Kurama-"
"Shhhhh..." Kurama soothed as he dropped Hiei's boxers. "Hands behind your back..."
Hiei moaned as he put his hands behind his back, he was shaking, he needed full-fledged fuck; and he wanted it right here in the bathroom. "What are you going to do?"
"I'm going to touch your intamate parts..." Kurama smiled, wrapping his hands around Hiei's shaft, aiming Hiei towards the bowl. "You can piss now..."
"B-but...I can't!"
Kurama soothed him. Hiei blushed, he hated when Kurama watched him piss and Kurama knew it. Hiei finally pissed, and Kurama smiled at Hiei's flushed face. "Okay, okay, I'll stop touching you now..." Kurama laughed, letting Hiei go.
Hiei mumbled, "finally!" then pulled up his boxers and buckled his pants.
Yusuke and Kuwabara had watched as Jeffery had brought Hiei's food out, and decided to get him back for not letting them see the present. Yusuke thanked his mom's bad shopping skills as he pulled out Viagra for men, and ground it up in Hiei's coke.
"You realize how bad he's going to hate us, right?" Yusuke chuckled.
"Yeah." Kuwabara agreed.
"I'm curious to see what he does..." Yusuke smirked. "Think he'll masturbate?"
"Ugh. I hope not!"
"I hope he does! That'd be a hellava blackmailing sceme!"
"Yeah, I suppose." Kuwabara agreed again. Then, Hiei and Kurama came back.
Kurama sat down, "Oh, look Hiei, 'Jeffery' got our drinks mixed up. Here's your iced tea." They traded off drinks, noticing that Yusuke and Kuwawbara had completly stopped eating, and were looking at each other wide-eyed.
Owari
Kitsumi: Okay, here's the deal, you might want to tell your friends to review and read this story (Even if you have to beg them) because if I get a sufficent ammount of reviews on these two chapters, I can instantly update with one or two more chapters (Depending on how many reviews I get) Thanks!
Kurama: Kitsumi wants to hear your opinions!
1. Should I make Kurama handle himself well on Viagra?
2. Should I make Kurama turn Youko on Viagra?
3. Should I make Yusuke and Kuwabara spike Hiei's iced tea with Viagra too?
4. Should I make Hiei get some tonight? (You know what I'm talking about!)
5. Should I make Karasu kill Jeffery in the next chapter?