Lily and James Fifth Year War
Messin' With the Girls
The next morning the girls were in a great mood. Thinking that because they declared war the boys would back off a little. Anyways, if the boys did attack, the three girls were excellent at defending themselves. Having someone good at Transfigurations, Potions, and Charms did pay off.
Boy's Dorm
"What are we going to do? Lily is strong in Charms, allowing them to torture us with hexes and spells, Bella is bloody good in Transfigurations, and Soph is the top of the class in Potions!"
"Hey! I'm good at Transfigurations!"
"Not as good as Bella."
"And Snape is good at Potions!"
"But Soph is still better. Anyways, what does Snape have to do with this?"
"Moony! Do you have any ideas?"
"Let me think. What if we did something to them at breakfast? Like oh, I don't know, make them turn into pigs?"
"That is brilliant Moony! But the problem is, we don't know how to turn them into pigs."
"Ahem. Mr. Potter is very good at Transfigurations and is able to do that simple little task."
"Alright then! Pretty girls into pigs! That'll be a major embarrassment to them. They are sure to surrender to the Almighty Marauders!"
"Shut up Sirius, don't get too far ahead of yourself. After all, this is only the second day of 'the war'."
"Aw Moony! Why did you have to spoil my fun! I must admit though, I feel sorry for the girls."
Meanwhile...
Girl's Dorm
"Ok ok ok, we've declared war and we know we are better than the boys. All we have to do is stick together."
"Why?"
"Uh!
Soph! Don't you get it! You're good at potions, me in
Transfigurations, and lily in Charms!"
"Yeah! I can put hexes on them, Bella can change them into who knows what and you and you could help us make potions to embarrass them!"
"OH! I get it!"
"Hey guys! We should plan an attack on the boys today. Just to show them who is charge."
"Great idea Lil!"
"So what should we do?"
"Hmmmmm.... My best guess would be that the attack has to happen before we enter the Great Hall."
"In that case, why don't we put something on them?"
"How about...-"
"OH! I've got it! We'll put grease in their hair!"
"Huh? Lils your crazy!"
"No, you see, James and them like to make fun of Snape mostly because of the grease in their hair. Right?"
"Yeah. So?"
"So what if we made him like Snape. You know it'd be like their worst nightmare!"
"Oh. I get it!"
"Mmm hmmm."
"So girls, you up for it?"
"You bet!"
"But-"
"Yes Bella?"
"Um, where do we get the grease?"
"Easy! Snape!"
"How?"
"Just wait-I've been spying on Snape lately-"
"Excuse me, but why were you spying on Snape?"
"Because I was planning the Grease Scheme a long time ago."
"Oh."
"Hey! Why didn't we know then?"
"Anyways... in about.. fifty-two seconds, he'll be by the Gryffindor Door trying to figure out the password."
"Why?"
"He's helping Lucius."
"Uhh. He disgusts me!"
"He disgusts all of us!"
"Anyways, right about....now, he'll be in front of the Fat Lady."
"Let's go."
The girls left their room and locked it with a locking spell.
In Front of the Fat Lady
"Ahh!"
"Geez! Serverus! You scream like a girl!"
"Ah, if it isn't Evans and her little gang of friends."
"So what about it?"
"Nothing! What do you want anyways?"
"Um... if you don't mind, we'd like some grease."
"Um-Why?"
"Well, I thought since you hated Potter, and we girls want to get revenge on him, some of your grease in his hair would really scare him off." Lily grins mischievously.
"Oh. For Potter then eh?"
"Yes,"
"How much do you need?"
"Just enough to cover three heads."
"So it's not just Potter. Who else is there?"
"That would Sirius and Remus."
"Oh. OK. Wait a minute."
Accio grease!
With that ten cans came zooming through the halls.
"Thanks Sna-uh I mean Serverus."
"Whatever. Here are three cans. One is enough to cover each head."
"Ah. Thank you. Now be off with you. Our Gryffindor password is still only for us Gryffindor."
"Tut tut. Be off with you now."
"Hmph!"
With that, Snape, stomped off in failure.
"Soph, what was the password again?"
"Viennetta"
"Oh. Let's go in."
back in the Girl's dorm
"So lily, how are we supposed to put the grease on the boy's heads?"
"Watch, first, we melt the grease so it turns into liquid, then we each summon a can with the levitating spell when the boys come out of their dorms. Then we just dump the can on their heads, the melted grease will find its way around the head."
"Great! But how do we melt it?"
"Urg! Bella! You put the cans in hot water! Soph already did that!"
"OH. Ok."
Boy's Dorm
"Guys! I'm hungry! Can we go down and eat?! Please?"
"Come on Sirius! But yes let's go. Come on Moony."
The boys then grab their stuff and headed out the door.
Girl's Dorm
"Soph! How's the grease?"
"Ready!"
"Let's go troops!"
With that the girls took a can of grease and hid behind a big sofa by the Gryffindor door.
"Oh! Oh! James! Don't forget to change the girls into pig!"
Wingardium Levioso!
With that, the grease was lifted. A second later it splashed on the three heads walking out of the common room.
"Ahh! What is this stuff?"
"Ewww! It's grease!"
"Yuck, I bet the girls did this."
"You are correct Remus!" a sly voice floated around the Gryffindor Common room.
"The grease is on behalf of Snape."
"It won't come off for twenty-four hours no matter how hard you try."
"Yep! Oh and Sirius, if you don't hurry, breakfast'll be over."
"Let's go girls."
"You said it Lils."
Outside the common room
"Soph-"
"Yeahï¼
"I don't feel like going to breakfast. I mean, you heard them say that they were going to turn us into pigs."
"Yeah. I agree with Lils."
"Yeah, you've got a point. Let's go to the kitchens then."
"Ok!"
"Lead the way!"
"Why me? Lils you do it?"
"Why me? Cause you know where it is!"
"And like you don't?"
"Um...no. You were the one who followed the boys."
"OH. That's right. Oh well, come on girls."
At the Kitchen
"All you have to do is tickle the pear. Then, the pear will turn into a doorknob and you twist it to enter."
"Gotcha! I want to try!"
"Whatever Bella." Sighed Soph in an exasperated voice.
"oOo! It actually works" giggled Bella.
"What did you think? That I would lie?"
"Shut up! Let's go in."
"Hello! What can Prissy get for the three young ladies?"
"Some toasts of bread and three goblets of pumpkin juice will be fine."
"What!!!ãSoph! why did you order that little food?"
"Well, 1.) you don't want to turn into pigs without needing magic and 2.) We never did eat a lot of food."
"Oh. I'm guessing that that was the obvious."
"Mmm hmm."
"Sorry."
"No need Bella."
"Misses, your food is here."
"Thank you Prissy."
"No need miss."
"Lily,
how much time do we have until classes start?"
"Huh!?! Ah! We
better get going we have two minutes left and this is very far from
Defense of Dark Arts!"
"Whaaaaaaaaaat!!! We have DADA first?!?!?!?
"Ummm...I don't want to know, but who is it with?"
"First, we'll walk no, run and talk, or you can find out later. LET'S GO!!!!!!!"
RIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGGGG!!!!! SLAM! (door shuts)
"Whew we made it."
"AHHH!"
"What?!"
"We have DADA with the Slytherins! And-and-and- I think this is a double."
"Calm down. Just remember, Professor Shrout only reads from the textbooks and rarely looks up. Hopefully, we can play our normal rounds of Poker without some stupid Slytherin tattling on us."
"That's easy for you to say! You always use some weird charm to make your cards invisible to the other people, we are the only people who see it!"
"Weelll-I could teach you guys the spell."
"FINE!"
"Evans! Figg! (Arabella- a.k.a Bella) Schoff! (Sophie- a.k.a Soph) May I ask what is it that you three girls are talking about? Class hasn't even begun!"
"Ummm...-"
"We were talking about what you might be-uh-uh-..."
"Teaching us today!"
"Yeah, what you were going to teach us."
"Ok. Fine, have you figured out what I will be teaching you today then?"
"No, not really. We learn so much in each class, it's really hard to predict what you will be teaching next."
"Oh. Ok then. I suggest you listen to today's lesson then."
On the other side of the classroom.
"Hah! The girls are in for it now. It's never easy to escape from Pro. Shrout. He'll interrogate you until you run outta a breath!"
"Shut up Sirius. You also know that the girl's are very good at lying. Right Remus?"
Remus muttering to himself: "I still can't believe I have grease in my hair! I wash it everyday and then the grease gets stuck in my hair and it won't come out! Argh! I might as well go bald!!!!"
"Uhh.. Remus are you okay? You were-uh-talking to yourself."
"Huh?!? Oh. That. I was saying that I couldn't believe that I got grease in my hair. It really annoys me."
"Hey, don't worry, Sirius and I also have grease in our hair. We're um.. living with it."
"Huh! Living with it! Sirius is enjoying it!"
"Yeah that's true!"
"Oh well. The Pro is starting the lesson"
Slytherins Side
"Oh! Look Snapey! Some of the Gryffindor's have started to take on your grease!"
Snape laughs to himself "Those girls really know how to put grease on someone's head, look at Remus, he seems disgusted out of his wits! Ha Ha Ha!"
"Shut up Kirsten! You're just as annoying to me as they are."
"gasp Serverus! You really don't mean that do you?"
"Yes. Actually I do."
"You hurt my feelings."
"Awww. I'm sorry. The wittle waby isn't gonna cry is it?"
"Serverus Snape! You cut that out right now!!!!!"
"Why should I?"
"I am warning you." Kristen growled.
"Oh fine fine fine."
Kristen walked away just as Lucious Malfoy walked up. She was terrified of him ever since what he did to her in second year.
"So, Serverus, I see that you have done a prank on the Potter gang."
"Um...not really. I didn't really do it, I just supplied the grease. Heh heh heh."
"WHAAAT!!! You mean that you didn't pull the prank but you gave the pranksters grease?!?!?!"
"heh heh. Yes."
"Ok then, who did the prank then?"
"um...."
"OUT WITH IT!!!!!"
"uh-Evans, Schoff, and Figg." Whispered Serverus
"WHAAAAT!?!?! You let the girls do the prank? What are you? Mental or something? You know I'm starting to think that when Lupin said that you needed to go to St. Mungo's he was right!"
"Calm down! Keep it going and the class'll be staring at you!"
"Serverus! Every single move you make, you are suppose to report to me you idiot!"
Serverus who was now angry started to talk back to his so-called 'Master'
"WHY SHOULD Iï¼I HAVE A LIFE TOO YOU KNOW! I NEED TO LIVE IT WITHOUT YOU LOOKING AT MY EVERY MOVE!" that was said just loud enough to show that he was angry but quiet enough to keep the class serene (and bored).
"Watch your mouth! My dad could easily have you killed!" that word sent shivers down his (Snape's) back.
Then Narcissa walked over to her boyfriend (Malfoy) "Honey stop fighting. Please. Let Serverus be but if he messes up again, he's all yours."
"You're lucky that my girlfriend stepped in and saved your ass! Or else you'd be dead by now! I'll talk to you later, Snape." Lucious Malfoy hissed at Serverus before departing.
back to the class
"OK class. I hope you all paid attention. You will need to know all this on your O.W.L.S ok!"
"Yes professor Shrout" everyone chorused in a bored tone.
RIIIINNNGG!!!
"Ok class. That's the bell. I want all of you to read the next two chapters for homework!"
Great Halll (lunch)
"Well DADA went great." Sulked Soph
"Awww. Come on! Just because you lost three dollars in each round isn't that bad!" cried Lily.
"Think Lily. How many rounds of poker did we play?"
"Ummm. I don't know. Bella?"
"I think we played about ten rounds of poker, why?"
"BECAUSE I LOST THRITY DAMN DOLLARS TO YOU TWO AND I NEVER LOST BEFORE!!!!!!!!" now Soph was real angry. Her eyes showed it along with her skin color which slowly became red.
"Uh. But it's only thirty goddamned dollars. If you looked at Bella and me, we use to lose some hundred dollars to you!"
"Fine! You win! But I still can't believe that I lost. I'm not feeling well. I'm skipping luch."
"Sure. We'll come with you. Right Lily?"
Lily who was stuffing her face with a piece of toast didn't seem to hear until Bella shook her.
"Wha--?"
"Soph doesn't want to eat lunch so we're not eating either and following her. RIGHT?!?!?"
"Huh? OH yes! Of course!"
"Ok then its settle. We're not eating lunch. Soph, please lead the way."
Boy's Conversation During Lunch
"Uh! I still can't believe they were right as to how the grease won't come out. I wonder what they did to it."
"Shut up Remus. You're just gonna havta live with it." Sirius said in a little too happy voice.
"Aww great! Not you too! First James tells me and now YOU! My first day of war is going great!"
"Rium rimr. Ri roomd rims rummy!" cried Sirius who was stuffing his face.
"Uh. I didn't quite catch that."
"I said, the food is great."
"oh."
"I got itï¼You know how we didn't get to change the girl's into pigs,-"
"Yeah."
"-well why don't we do it now, for revenge."
"Sure. Now where are they."
"Ummm. James,-"
"Yeah. WHAT! I'm trying to look for the girls."
"Well, you won't find them."
"And why is that Remus?" James said in an annoyed voice.
"b'cause the girls just left the great hall."
"WHAT!" came the shouts from Sirius and James.
"Y-y-you what!?"
"I saw them leave." Whispered Remus cause by now the whole Gryffindor table was staring at them.
"oh. Sorry." James said sheepishly glancing around the Gryffindor table
Sirius didn't say anything. He just sulked.
"I can't believe we didn't get to changed them into pigs. Those little brats are gonna get it!"
"But we still have dinner. Just, um, don't get your hopes up."
"Why?"
"Because with our luck, they'll probably skip dinner too! Sirius! Sometimes you are just a little too dense for that head of yours!!!!'
"Your right. About the dinner part at least."
"What do you mean about the dinner part at least?"
"GEEZ JAMES!!! YOU KNOW PERFECTLY WELL WHAT I MEAN!"
"Guys, if you're gonna argue, go somewhere where people won't stare at you like your crazy!ãThis is the second time during lunch that you guys caused up a storm! I am damn tired of it!"
"Fine! James! We are going to the Common Room to end this. LET'S GO!"
"Bring it on!"
"Guys! I'm coming. But honestly! You guys are best friends! Why are you guys fighting?"
"I am damn tired of having being called having a dense mind!"
"I am damn tired that he has that dense mind that thickens by the minute!"
"You better watch your mouth you!"
"Well, the girls say 'Walk n' Talk' I say 'Walk n' STAY SILENT! NOW MOVE! BOTH OF YOU!"
Both boys grunted but obediently got up and followed Remus, each walking in total silence.