I am Jhonen Vasquez and I created Invader Zim. I am also Pythagoras and I created the Pythagorean theorem.

Chapter Four: Ms. Bitters

I'm happy to tell you, class, recess is over. I kept telling you it would be and now it is.

Now look up here, you doomed children. Look up I said. If you don't all look up right now you are all doomed to eternal detention...

That's better.

Doom it. I wanted to give the whole class detention and set a new record.

Pay attention... not that it matters much because you're all doomed to just be entry level MacMeaties telephone sales clerks anyway...

Open your Geometry books to the same doomed thing we did yesterday. You are doomed to review it for the rest of the skool year.

Now Pythagoras' Doomed Theorem is doomed to claim that the doomed sum of the doomed areas of two small and equally doomed squares equals the doomed area of the large doomed one. In doomed algebraic terms, A squared plus B squared is doomed to always equal C squared. C is doomed to always be the doomed hypotenuse and A and B are the equally doomed sides of this whole doomed triangle. This doomed theorem is doomed to be of fundamental importance in the Euclidean Geometry where it is doomed to serves as a doomed basis for the doomed definition of doomed distance between two doomed points. It is doomed to be so basic that any doomed one who took doomed geometry classes in doomed hi skool is DOOMED to remember it long after other doomed math principles are doomed to have been doomed and forgotten.

Any questions? No questions?

GOOD.

Doom, if we take this doom problem, and doom doom the doom doom doom, we doom doom...

Zim! Stop throwing sharp pointy things at Dib. If you continue to disrupt the rest of the class, you will be doomed to be even more doomed than you already are. And Dib, you stop throwing dirty looks at Zim! He can't help it if he is doomed to have a skin condition.

... doom doom, doom doom doom. Doom! Doom, you are doomed to do that problem at the board. Even if you ARE doomed to get it wrong.

WRONG. I knew it. You're doomed. And YOU'RE doomed, and you're doomed, and you're also doomed, and YOU'RE especially doomed, and you're likewise doomed, and you're doomed too, and...

... and you're doomed as well, Dib. Here's what you are all doomed to...

You are doomed to do the Calculus Exercises on pages 100 to 106, inclusive. And by "inclusive," that means it includes both sides of the paper, so you are also doomed to do pages 99 and 107 as well. And read Chapters 10 through 20 of World Geography: An Outside Perspective. You are doomed to be tested on these chapters tomorrow. Those of you who aren't doomed to get run over on the way home, that is.

Class! Stop packing your books. It isn't three o'clock yet.

The universe is just doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed... doomed. NOW it's three o'clock. Get out of here.

DOOM makes the world go around.

(A/N) This took at the most an hour. Very unusual for me.