A/N:

I haven't exactly finished the Kingdom Hearts game, so I don't know for sure what happens in the end. All I know is that Riku and Sora fight … so I improvised, playing around with my own ideas of what could've gone on between Riku and Sora during the fight. Forgive the fluffiness, unless you like fluff (like me). Please R&R! Compliment me, critique me, flame me … but please don't be too harsh! My ego has already been deflated by my non-yaoi-loving cousins, and I'm not particularly happy with this fic. Anyway … tell me what you think! Maybe it's not as bad as I think …? Oh, I hope so. Any way, enjoy!

XO'MagickMoon'OX

To Hurt The One You Love …

Sora sidestepped the blade of burning amethyst aimed at his head. He ducked another strike before thrusting his Keyblade at his opponent. His attack was blocked. Sora's mop of brown hair was matted with sweat to his head and neck, a cool bead of perspiration rolling down his temple. He looked to the porcelain skin of his enemy, skin that once had been warm and friendly, and noticed that he wasn't sweating at all. Only his ragged breathing betrayed his weariness. His enemy's mane of silver, iridescent hair flared around his face as he swung at Sora. His piercing aqua eyes held nothing but anger and hate. Sora used to love those eyes.

Riku's eyes.

Riku's mouth was fixed in a snarl, his fangs bared as he lunged again at Sora. Sora jumped back and brought his Keyblade out to knock away his opponent's blade.

"Riku!" he cried as a sharp, shooting pain tore through his body from the impact of Riku's blade against his own weapon. "Why –"

He gasped as Riku's sword came within a hair's width of his stomach. He jumped back just in time, rolling to the side to dodge another strike as it came towards his head.

"You don't know how much," Riku panted through gritted teeth, "pain you've caused me, Sora!"

He lunged at his opponent, stabbing at his shoulder. Sora blocked and then thrust his weapon at Riku's abdomen. The silver-haired boy sidestepped it, his sword coming down on Sora's Keyblade with a clang. They pushed their weapons against each other, Sora from his kneeling position, Riku with his legs braced, every muscle in his body trembling.

"What are you … nnng!" Sora pushed harder on Riku's sword. "What are you talking about!" he managed before he rolled away from their deadlock with a gasp, no longer able to match strength against Riku.

"You abandoned me!" Riku shouted as he stumbled back, catching his breath. "You disappeared, and went off with the duck and that mutant dog, being the big hero and all. You went off to search for Kairi, not me. Just her. You didn't care what happened to me! I searched all over, hopping from world to world, looking for you. And when next I found you, you'd replaced me with two new friends!" He glared at Sora as the brown-haired boy stood. His piercing eyes glittered with malice and spite.

"That's not true!" Sora cried.

"Liar!" Riku thrust his blade straight at Sora's chest. Sora swung his Keyblade down and blocked the attack. Riku's step faltered, and he fell forward, landing him on his knees at Sora's feet. His blade fell from his grasp, clattering to the ground. He felt Sora's Keyblade on his shoulder; Sora would just have to force his weapon to the side to take Riku's head clear off.

Despite himself, Riku looked up at his opponent. That was when Sora noticed that Riku's eyes weren't glittering with hate; they were glittering with tears.

Sora removed his Keyblade from Riku's shoulder, holding it down at his side. "R-Riku?"

Riku screwed his eyes shut, attempting to keep the tears back. He didn't want to cry anymore. He'd spent too much time crying … so many nights, when the darkness surrounded him and he felt so alone. Now the darkness was a part of him, but it still made him cry … for other reasons.

He knew he'd made a mistake … he knew he'd betrayed Sora and everyone else. But what hurt the most, what tore at his already shattered heart, was the knowledge that he couldn't fix his mistake. He was in too deep, and there was no going back. No one could help him … not even …

Not even Sora.

With a swift cry of rage, Riku jumped up and grabbed his blade, all before Sora could react. The battle continued.

With each clang of their weapons, with each grunt and groan, with each dodge and duck and roll, Riku felt his anger building.

It was all because of Sora that he was like this. Sora had left him. Sora had replaced him with new friends. Sora had gone off being the big hero and had forgotten all about him.

Sora had broken his heart.

Riku stabbed at Sora's chest, and then his leg, and then his stomach, and then swung at Sora's head in a flash of blind fury. Each strike was blocked, but just barely. Sora gripped his Keyblade and raised it above his head, bringing it down on Riku's blade.

Then Sora began a whirlwind of incessant strikes. Riku was awestruck at such a burst of strength and energy. He had no time to counter as the attacks came, one after the other. He found himself moving back with each clang of their weapons. Sora was backing him into the wall, he realized. He felt trapped, like he was a mouse being closed in on by a cat. Riku refused to be the mouse in this situation. Sora held his Keyblade above his head and leapt into the air. Riku rolled forward and jumped up, turning to face Sora as the boy's Keyblade struck the wall right where Riku was standing moments ago. Sora regained his balance and turned.

Now he was the one backing into the wall.

As Riku took a step forward, Sora stepped backwards, a shiver running up his spine as his back touched the cold wall, standing as a stone barrier behind him, leaving him no room to escape.

Riku raised his blade and brought it down, and Sora quickly blocked the attack. Riku's blade was inches from the blue-eyed boy's face. The only thing holding it back was the shaft of Sora's Keyblade. Sora looked up into Riku's eyes, and what he saw made him gasp.

What he saw, swimming within the depths of Riku's beautiful, aqua eyes, was pain. Unbearable, torturing pain. But what startled Sora the most was that doubled with the pain was uncertainty and … love.

As if in response to Sora's discovery, Riku leaned in and pressed his lips against Sora's, initiating a swift, chaste kiss. Seconds later – seconds that to Sora seemed more like an eternity, seconds where his heart had begun to pound faster than he had ever known it could, seconds where he felt Riku's soft, savory lips against his own, seconds he realized he didn't want to end – Riku pulled back and pushed away from their deadlock.

"Wha …?" Sora was speechless.

He ducked as Riku swung at his head. The blade grated against the wall, leaving a long slash in the brick.

"How can you do this!" Sora cried. Riku froze, watching the other curiously. Seeing that he had Riku's attention, Sora continued, "How can you … kiss me, and then try to … try to kill me!"

Riku smirked, much to Sora's annoyance. "Because I love you, and I hate you."

Sora frowned. "What!"

Riku gripped his sword with both hands, taking another step back, trying to draw his opponent away from the wall. "Sora," his clear voice rang out, resounding through the area, "I always loved you. You … and no one else. I still love you, and I will always love you. I can't change that." His tone lowered, dropping to a menacing growl. "But, at the same time, I blame you for what's happened to me."

Sora couldn't believe what he was hearing. He loved him? Wait a minute … he blamed him? "Why!" Sora cried. "What did I do?"

Riku continued to back up. "Come here, and I'll tell you."

Sora tightened his grip on his Keyblade and lunged forward. He swung at Riku, and Riku leapt out of the way. The silver-haired boy started to talk.

"Everyone has darkness in their heart, Sora. If the darkness is fed by pain and sorrow and unfulfilled desires, it grows and devours the heart, turning it to ice." Riku blocked another attack. "Nnng …" He dodged and rolled, jumping up again to bring his blade down on his opponent. This time, the blade grazed the boy's shoulder, tearing his shirt and leaving a small wound, resulting in a wince and a sharp curse from Sora. Riku continued, "When you disappeared, I spent all of my time searching for you. When I found you, you were with Donald and Goofy, and you were the wielder of the Keyblade, a big hero out to save King Mickey. You didn't need me anymore. I felt alone and abandoned. … And that was when I turned to darkness. I needed something I could depend on, I needed to feel strong. You were always the one I depended on. I depended on you for solace, for strength and happiness. You were this little ray of sunshine in a world full of evil, your bright smile, your happy-go-lucky disposition. I felt lighter when I was around you. And when you left, I had nothing … no one to make me feel that way anymore, to give me relief from the cruel, ironic reality of the world. I needed you, and you left me. So I turned to the shadows, full of empty promises and false hope … looking for that relief again. … And not only did my hope and happiness disappear with you, but my heart broke to think that you didn't need me anymore."

Tears sprang, unbidden, to Riku's eyes. He tried to suppress them, but it was no good. Sora had his Keyblade held above his head, preparing to swing again, but stopped. He watched his opponent warily. His head was swimming with everything that Riku had said, but he had still managed to carry on the fight, blocking and attacking all the while.

Riku's blade slipped from his grasp as he fell to his knees, his head in his hands. He continued through a veil of tears, "I … loved you so much … even if it was an unrequited love, I still had you around … I was still one of your best friends. I thought that, even if you didn't love me the way I loved you, you still cared about me … I was still important to you. But … But when I found you with those two characters, with that blade in your hand, smiling and having a good time while I was worried sick … it broke my heart. I was convinced that you had replaced me, convinced that I wasn't that important to you after all, convinced that you really didn't care about me. I couldn't bare it. Darkness … offered me solace from this heartbreak. I wanted the pain to go away … but I didn't want to lose my heart. I never knew that the pain wouldn't go away, but just freeze … I didn't know that darkness would numb my heart so."

Riku looked up, his eyes red and his face flushed, his cheeks glistening with tears. Sora couldn't help but think how beautiful he looked, his hair of spun moonlight tossed about his face, his eyes sparkling, his eyelashes wet and emphasizing the ethereal air of his gaze … the rare shade of pink tinting his face …

But it was all shattered as Riku's cold glare tore through his beauty, breaking the momentary spell he held over Sora. Riku slowly got to his feet, reclaiming his weapon. "You turned me into this." Riku spread his arms wide, displaying his current form, his black coat and boots, his blade … but most of all, he wanted to show Sora what wasn't obvious to the naked eye; he wanted to show Sora the block of sharp ice he had now where his heart used to be. "I'm practically a Heartless, thanks to you. Because of you," he spat through clenched teeth, "I turned to darkness. It's all your fault, Sora!" He gripped his blade with both hands, taking a step towards his opponent. "I HATE YOU!"

He raised his blade above his head and attacked Sora. Sora blocked, rolling away. "Riku!" he shouted.

Riku stopped, panting, gripping his blade tightly in his black-gloved hands. "What?" he spat.

"It's not my fault!" Sora gasped, trying to catch his breath. "You're the one that turned to darkness –"

"Quiet," Riku commanded. He took a step towards Sora, dropping his blade. It clattered to the ground. Tears rolled down his cheeks, replacing the ones from moments ago. What he did next totally caught Sora by surprise.

Riku reached out and enveloped Sora in a tight embrace, wrapping his strong arms around the smaller boy, burying his head in Sora's shoulder. Sora felt his Keyblade slip from his fingers as he stood there, frozen in shock, while Riku broke into wracking sobs.

"You idiot!" Riku cried. "I know it's not your fault."

"But you said –"

"I know what I said! I didn't mean it. I don't blame you … for anything. I can't blame you … it's not your fault." Riku found that his anger was exhausted, any idea of blaming Sora exhausted with it. His words and actions before had been driven by raw, pent-up anger, an anger that was gone now.

Sora seemed to sense this. Tentatively, he hugged Riku back, wrapping his arms around the silver-haired boy's cloaked body.

They stood there for a few moments, moments that seemed to drag on forever. But then Riku pushed Sora away. "I … Sora …" he whispered. "I still … I still made a terrible mistake. A mistake that I can't reverse. I made myself your enemy when I succumbed to darkness, and you have to finish … this battle. We have to finish this battle. You still have to … save the worlds, and I'm too ... too unreliable to leave undefeated. I may fall further into darkness if you don't stop me now, and then nothing will matter. Not you, not my friends, not my feelings … nothing. I will be a Heartless; I will permanently be your enemy."

The truth cut through Sora like a knife. His mind flashed on Donald and Goofy, both of whom were lying somewhere, unconscious. He thought of Kairi, whom he still had to find. He thought of King Mickey and the kingdom and the worlds … all of which he still had to save. He couldn't let anything stop him from finishing his quest. He was the Keybearer. He had responsibility and duty.

He couldn't let his emotions get in the way of that. Even if …

"I love you, Riku."

Riku froze, staring down at the younger boy. "No," he hissed. "No, don't … don't say that." If Sora loved him back, Riku knew it would make it all that much harder to accept his mistake, to accept that he betrayed his friend … and not just his friend, but the one he loved, the one who loved him back. It would make it all that much harder to accept the fact that he had fallen to darkness, to accept the fact that there was no going back.

"But it's true!" Sora found himself saying, the words tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop them. And he realized that it was true, he did love Riku, even though he had never really known it. But now, now more than ever, he knew it to be totally and completely true.

Quickly, he reached up and pressed his mouth against Riku's before the other boy could protest. He moved his lips against Riku's, goading him into returning the kiss. Which he did, but only for a sweet, fleeting moment before he forced himself to pull away. Riku looked down at the Sora with tear-blurred eyes.

"Finish the battle," he demanded. "You have to do it, now, before I change my mind, before I start thinking with my emotions instead of my head."

Sora drew a sharp breath. He knew he had to do it … but … he couldn't. Riku saw his hesitation.

"You have to! Now!" Riku bent and picked up the Keyblade, thrusting it at Sora. Sora caught it, but kept it held firmly at his side. Riku screwed his eyes shut. "Please," he whispered.

"I … I can't … Riku," Sora murmured.

"Rrrrgh … Sora this is a war! One side has to win, either the good or the evil. You have to face the fact that we're on opposite sides … one of us has to win … right here, right now. And," Riku stooped and took up his blade, "if you don't win, then I have to."

He swung at Sora, putting all of the force he had into the attack. Sora gasped and blocked, a deafening clang echoing through the area. "Fight back!" Riku commanded.

Sora glared at his opponent, his bright blue eyes glittering with tears. But he obeyed, and the battle continued. Riku dropped to his knees to dodge another strike, and then Sora knocked Riku's blade from his hand. It skidded across the ground, out of Riku's reach. He looked up at his opponent, his eyes meeting the other's. Sora glimpsed the fear held within the aqua depths of Riku's eyes and felt his heart ache. But Riku was right: one of them had to win.

"I'm sorry, Riku."

Sora raised his blade above his head and prepared to end the battle.

-End-