Chapter Eleven: Reactions of Rage and Tears
"What!"
You'd think it would be Sirius who was royally freaking out, but no… it was Remus.
Everyone jumped at the sound of his voice: incredulous, disbelieving… what happened to cool, calm, and collected Remus?
"What do you mean 'what'?" On the last word James mimicked Remus and his shocked expression.
Remus hissed, "What about… you know… the plan?"
James waved a hand nonchalantly, signifying he didn't care. "It never would've worked anyway. She hates me. End of story."
Remus' eyes narrowed. "Did she say that?" He whispered.
"Well…no," James admitted, "but she's out there flirting with Davies—isn't that enough?"
Meanwhile, Sirius and Peter were watching this little exchange, both confused.
"What in bloody hell is going on here?" Sirius asked loudly, causing both boys (who were in the middle of a glaring competition) to look at him.
After a few tense moments, Remus sighed, running a hand over his eyes with a weary sigh. "At the beginning of the year," he began, not seeing James glare at him, telling him to stop. "James approached me—he wanted to win Lily over once and for all—but wasn't sure how to do it. I told him that he should just wait and be her friend—you know, taking it slow. Obviously, James is tired of waiting and all of my hard work has been in vain."
Sirius whacked James upside the head. "You prat!" Sirius said. "Has it occurred to you that Lily is ten times better than that wench Hufflepuff Cheri will ever be?"
James glared at Sirius murderously. "Don't. Talk. About. My. Girlfriend. Like. That."
Sirius sighed and then said softly, "Mate, what are you doing? You've been after Lily for years—and you're going to just give up?"
"That's just it Sirius," James said, "I've been after Lily for years. Don't you think I should move on?"
"You're only screwing things up Prongs," Peter piped up.
"Yeah," Remus agreed. "Why are you leaving something that could be great?"
"Maybe because it isn't worth the effort?" James asked quietly.
Three pairs of eyes darkened as they looked at James. "I hate to say this James," Sirius began solemnly, "but it seems like your fifteen-year-old self is damn smarter than the you of today. They clearly knew the meaning of the saying 'good things will come to those who wait.'"
James scowled at him but Remus broke in before he could say anything. "Look, we're not going to stand in your way when it comes to you and Cheri—but just think about it mate: what made Lily so special that you chase after her for two bloody years? It's clear she's worth the effort—but I think we all want to know: why aren't you willing to work for her anymore?"
James didn't know.
-
"Hey guys," It was Lily, of course, and upon seeing the Marauder's fallen faces she asked, "Why you looking so glum, chums?"
Sirius and Remus seemed to smile a little at this but said, "Oh, it's nothing."
Lily grinned. "What, a prank gone awry?"
Sirius laughed—a short laugh, but a laugh, nonetheless. "No, nothing of the sort."
Lily turned to James. "Where were you? One minute I see you and the next, you're gone. I mean, honestly, I must have searched the castle for a good half hour looking for you."
James could feel Sirius and Remus giving him a few scowls but he didn't look at them. "Sorry," he said flatly, "I had to do something else."
"Oh," Lily looked a little crestfallen. "Well, you could have said so earlier."
"It's none of your business," he growled back at her.
Sirius and Remus' glares intensified.
Lily looked hurt. "Oh… I know. I mean, if you had told me, then maybe I wouldn't have kept you so long."
James said nothing.
"Are you all right James?" Lily timidly asked. And that was something—Lily Evans was not a timid girl.
"I'm fine," James said. "I just didn't think you'd care. I thought you were too busy with Davies."
"Oh," Lily said knowingly. "Is that was this is about?" She sighed. "I'm terribly sorry for ignoring you like that—Will just needs help with charms, is all. I feel just awful." She pinched the bridge of her nose, indicating she was tired and exasperated. "That and that Cheri Tingstead girl was walking with her friends, pointing and laughing at me. And I can't seem to figure out why." She glared. "I feel like shit and that didn't seem to make it better. She's horrible."
"And she's my girlfriend," James replied in that dangerous tone again.
Lily turned bright red. "Oh! Oh, damn… me and my big mouth. I'm sorry James. I'm sure she wasn't laughing at me, or anyone else for that matter." She pinched her nose again. "I'm going to go to bed before I say anything else offending." She smiled—sadly? at the boys. "Night guys," they mumbled back replies and she looked at James and swallowed. "Night James."
He didn't look up at her or reply.
She felt tears burn her eyes at being so horribly snubbed and left the Gryffindor common room quickly.
Sirius and Remus looked at James, disgusted, while Peter was shaking his head. Sirius stood up. " I'm going to bed. Tell me when James gets back from Prick Land." And with that, he stalked off to bed, Remus and Peter in tow.
James put his head in his hands.
-
"And he did what!" Estella was furious. "Once I see him I'm going to wring his neck…"
"Estella, don't." A worse-for-wear Lily put a hand on her shoulder. "Please. It will only make things worse." One night of tears didn't do her well. Her once vibrant red hair was pulled back into a sloppy ponytail and her skin was pale. She was terribly lucky she was a witch, otherwise there would have been visible bags under her eyes. Her eyes were dull, dark forest green, and they were downcast that morning.
While she laid awake at night, she cried. James hurt her with his venomous looks and words. Why did it seem like he hated her? Was this what it was like for him in their fifth and sixth years? Well… except for the pining part. He was pining for her, and she was most certainly not pining for him… was she?
Alice broke in. "Yes, Estella, James may be a prat, but I say we just ignore him. If he speaks to us we'll answer him in the coldest way possible He isn't worth us noticing." She scowled. "Although I would like to kick his arse like that."
Selene sighed, shaking her head. "I'm going to have to ask Remus what's up with him…"
Lily smiled. "Ooh, Remus," she said—perhaps not as teasingly as she might have been able to—but she was tired; ten hours of lost sleep did that to a girl.
-
She's not even looking at me, though James during potions. Of course, by some odd twist of fate, the two were paired up together.
It had been two weeks since that night and his life was miserable. Because seemingly everyone he liked in Gryffindor was mad at him, he'd had to sit with Cheri at the Hufflepuff table during meals. He found out she was still as annoying as ever, but he found himself not caring. She was the only company he had as of late.
James sighed as he glanced around the surrounding tables. To make it worse, with Selene and Estella at the table in front of him, Sirius and Remus in the back, and Frank and Alice beside them, the hate towards him was known.
How devoted the subjects are to their queen. James thought dryly.
"Pass me the bicorn horn please," Lily said in a flat, cold voice. James shivered inwardly. This wasn't Lily… this was the dementor-kissed Lily. Where was the girl he had danced with?
"Lily," James said desperately, breaking the silence, "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I was in a bad mood and… and I know that doesn't justify me being rude to you, but I hope that you can forgive me."
Lily sighed. "I was really hurt James," she said quietly. "But I supposed that it was payback perhaps… I said worse things to you when we were younger."
"But I was a git," James said, surprised.
"And you still are," Lily half-smiled, her voice still quiet. "But I like you anyway."
James' heart felt light the rest of the day and everyone noticed that Lily's eyes were back to a clear and glowing green, with a wonderful sparkle to them.
Although the Marauders still were a bit tiffed with James, they let him sit with them at the Gryffindor table.
Things may have not been completely back to normal…
But it was a start.