A/N Hi all. First, this is a complete parody of King Arthur, so if you're not gifted with a BIG sense for humor and a lot of tolerance, rather don't read further. We have written this fanfic together, my sister Wintermage, and me, but we really don't own anything or anybody. We have written it just for fun, not for money. I doubt we would receive some anyway. Have fun, read and review.

The (k)nightmare

1. Practice

Great Britain, exercise yard of Arthur's knights

One morning, in typical summer English wetter – clouds, slowly disappearing fog, rain going to start every minute – Lancelot with Galahad were demonstrating their famous fencing skills in front of Bors and some of his children (namely number 3, 5 and 7).

The practice was going on for some time and because none of the fighters was able to get a significant advantage, the kids were getting bored. 3 and 5 started to chase their little sister 7. She ran towards her big protector, uncle Lancelot, who just made a little mistake. Unfortunately, Galahad noticed it and decided to finish the mach. He prepared for the final blow aiming the flat side of his sword on Lance's head. Lancelot tried to block, when something grabbed his feet.

The last sentence, he heard before Galahad's sword hit him with full power was: "Uncle Lance, save me!" and he fell unconscious to the ground.

The rest was first unable to move, they were exchanging horrified looks. Galahad paled.

Bors reacted as first: "You bastards, what have you done! Lancie-boy, are you O.K.?"

"Rather K.O." groaned the hited knight.

"I'm sorry, Lance, I don't wanted…" Galahad was still in shock.

"Uncle Lance, uncle Lance, are you dead?" crying little 7 tried to open the eyes of her idol with fingers.

"Daddy's fine, little one…ouch, just keep the fingers away."

Once again was Lancelot's sharp tongue quicker than his brain, so when he fully started to register the surrounding, he saw two Bors running toward him. His survival instincts raised him back to feet and carried him with uncertain steps away from the nearest presence of two furious Bors. He noticed two Arthurs coming and knew, in their near is he safe. Finally he reached his two commanders, who were looking VERY suspiciously on him and fell down on all four.

"Lancelot, are you drunken again?"

Children, after seeing the head-knight coming, knew this is the end of fun and disappeared as quickly as possible.

Pale Galahad tried to explain. "We were doing some fencing practice, when a little accident happened…" he was obviously feeling very unwell and down his perfectly shaved face were running drops of sweat.

Arthur after seeing the red spot on Lancelot's head just waved with hand to stop Galahad and said: "Prepare yourself, we're leaving, to deliver a message to Marius Honorius."

By leaving the exercise yard, Bors tilted his head to Galahad and whispered: "If I were on your place, Lancie-boy would not stand up any more."

Galahad only reddened and pretended his shoes were the most interesting things in universe.