Chapter 6: Sirius

It happened while he was flying somewhere above Manchester. The sky was engulfed by a raging green glow miles behind him. His bike spiralled out of control and he dropped several feet, only regaining control after he saw it - the Dark Mark.

Sirius Black revved his engine and flew as fast as his bike would allow, excusing the wind for the welling of tears in his eyes. Suddenly he stopped driving mid-air; James had sent him out for a reason. He was supposed to be searching for Dumbledore. It seemed days ago that Dumbledore sent them an owl explaining his need to journey to Leeds, yet it had only been a matter of hours.

Sirius sighed heavily and swung his head over his shoulder, peering into the darkened distance. He was almost there – half way between Godric's Hollow and Leeds. Should he turn back and fight with his friends, or summon Dumbledore? He should fly back and find Dumbledore and get help, for surely he couldn't do this alone. The eerie green glow encompassed him as he slowly turned his head back to meet it. He placed his head in his hands, closing his eyes and running his fingers through a few loose strands of hair. His mind was racing with possibilities; they were in danger right now as he floated there in the still night sky, their lives in his hands. If he made the wrong choice they were doomed. He jerked his head up suddenly and stared more closely at the Dark Mark. Slowly his gaze travelled behind his shoulder, piercing the inky black of the night sky.

"There is no Dark Mark in that direction," he whispered slowly to himself, fear flooding him. The Dark Mark hovered above anywhere a Death Eater attack took place. Wizards had not yet come up with a spell powerful enough to make it disappear completely, only shorten its length to a few hours. "If there was a mass muggle attack here, the Dark Mark would still be visible!" Sirius revved his engine with new vigour and set off at high speed. There was no muggle attack; it was a diversion.

'How could I have been so foolish?' Sirius thought to himself, his heart wrenched in anger. Sirius swore inwardly; he usually went with his gut feeling, something Lily often chided him for. 'Nice one Lil, the first time I actually take your advice and think things through…' His trail of thought stopped dead; he did not want to ponder on what could be. He didn't want to believe his friends were in any real danger. But all the while fear bubbled acidly in the pit of his stomach, his heartbeat slowed, hard thumps against his chest. Even though he wouldn't admit it to himself, Sirius knew there was reason to be worried. James was right – Lily had a rare gift for sensing danger. She had saved their skin on a number of times, thanks to her level-headedness and keen intellect. Quite the natural leader, she had been instantly recruited into the Order of Phoenix when she left Hogwarts and employed in the Ministry of Magic working with the darkest of magic's. She was one of the few that could withstand it without harm; hers was a rare magic, especially rare that she was born into a muggle family. 'That girl has always been indefinable, no wonder James was always so smitten with her.'

Sirius felt a pang in his heart when he thought of James. He couldn't help but be worried for him, even though James was a much better dueller than he. 'Heck, he is a much better person than I am, never mind fighter,' Sirius thought to himself, swallowing hard on the ever expanding lump in his throat. Sirius forced himself to smile and be positive, 'Think how James would react if he saw you breaking down over nothing! He's fine! Well able to hold his own!' His thoughts were stopped by an eruption that shook the world - another flash of green light exploded from the vicinity of Godric's Hollow, so bright that Sirius had to block his line of vision with his hands. He shut his eyes tightly and could still see the glowing green light burning through his eyelids. With the lights came a roar so loud it resounded in his mind long after it had gone. Silence fell and fear crept through his body as he saw the Dark Mark vanish slowly, leaving naught but a green hue on the skyline. And so he flew onwards to Godric's Hollow, praying his fears would not be recognised.

Sirius steered the bike into a nosedive, not taking any heed to the speed at which he was flying. His face was heated and a numbness not related to the cold weather was seething through his body. The bike landed unceremoniously and Sirius jumped from it before both wheels touched the ground, causing it to fall and spin on its side, sparks emitting from the screeching body. Panic coursed through him, his chest tightened as worry gripped his heart. He stood on the roadside, willing his lead-filled body to move.

His heart was pounding slowly, rhythmically and with great force against his chest. With great effort, Sirius succeeded in moving his reluctant body. Anxiety brought with it new fears and as his pace quickened Sirius felt his legs grow weak, as though his muscles had vanished. His stomach clenched and unclenched with every painful breath he took, cutting his throat like rusty razor blades.

"James?" he called out from the garden, hoping beyond hope that his friend would shuffle out from the smouldering ruins of their home, wife and child in hand.

"James!" he repeated a little more eagerly as he cautiously reached the front door, hanging from its hinge as though it had been ripped from it. The air was humid and stuck in Sirius's throat as he edged his way in through the door. The floorboards creaked and moaned beneath him; the house was growing unstable.

Sirius was growing more anxious of the lack of activity in the house – why wasn't James out of here by now with Lily and Harry? Where were they? This house is going to fall to pieces any minute now.

The silence was punctuated by the sounds of flames licking the walls, floorboards begging to release the loads and succumb to the weight of the house. Sirius placed his hand on the dining room door, took a steadying breath and vigilantly pushed it open.

Time stood still.

Sirius did what he had been threatening to do ever since he heard of the prophecy. Hot, stinging tears flowed from his eyes, drowning him in his sorrow. At his feet lay the body of his best friend, fellow marauder and virtual brother, James Harold Potter. Sirius fell to his knees, grief encapsulating his entire being. He lifted the limp form of James into his arms and buried his face in his chest.

"Prongs," he cried, "No, not this, anything but this…"

His tears flowed more furiously as angry, heartfelt sobs shook him. He touched his hand to his friends face and his tears took new life in feeling that he was still warm.

"This is all my fault," he wailed, "if I hadn't delayed in coming here you would still be alive! I could have fought to save you. If I hadn't delayed in going in the first place, I could have been back in time with help! You needn't have died."

James lay motionless in his arms, his skin growing colder to the touch. Sirius held him close to him, his heart now aching yet the realisation of these events still had not hit him. His tears were many and true, but he could not come to terms with the death of his friend.

Sirius lifted his heavy head slowly to examine James.

"Wake up, buddy, I can't do this without you," he spluttered out, his throat thick. His voice sounded distant and unfamiliar, "I've never been anything without you, James. You are my best friend. Remember all the good times we had?" Words were flowing from Sirius now as memories of their time together flooded him; Sirius and James had been inseparable since their first day on the Hogwarts Express. Despite their different looks, they were often confused for brothers, taking on each other's mannerisms while living in such close proximity for so long. He remembered how willingly he had been welcomed into their home, into their family, "You are the only true brother I have ever known, James. I have never been without you. You were always the brains of the operation, please don't leave me."

He took out his wand and pointed it at James's chest, one last gesture of hope.

"E.. Ennervate," he muttered, sending a jolt into James. His tears were obscuring his vision, and his lip trembled.

Nothing happened.

"Ennervate!" he repeated, a little more meaning behind his voice. Again, James's wilted body did not respond.

"Yeh'll not get any response, lad," a gruff voice emerged from behind him. Wand still drawn Sirius turned quickly, not loosening his grasp on his dearly departed friend. He relaxed somewhat when he recognised the face belonging to the voice and wiped his tears on the back of his hand.

"Hagrid," he murmured, not quite sure what to say to him.

"Come on, he'll not hear yeh where he's gone," Hagrid reasoned soothingly, his own face damp with tears. Sirius looked up at him from watery eyes, the tears begging for release.

"I can't leave him," Sirius whispered.

"He's already left, Sirius," said Hagrid, his voiced quavering as he bent down to pry James from Sirius's grasp, "Medi-Wizards are on the way ter deal wi' him an' Lily."

"Lily?" Sirius whispered, curiosity outweighing the dread steadily increasing within him.

"Aye," Hagrid sighed, his heart heavy at the sight of this dishevelled wreck of a man before him. He would certainly take the death the hardest and Hagrid needed to be strong for his sake.

"We cannot leave them in here!" Sirius screamed, "These are my best friends, you don't honestly expect me to leave their bodies in here. What if… What if…"

"Sirius, yeh need t'listen, an' listen good, 'cause we don' have much time. This place is goin' t'fall ter pieces. Now, Lily and James are in a bet'er place. Wha's left here is on'y their bodies. Not their souls. Where they are they can' feel any pain. They left emp'y shells behind 'em, the greater an' more importan' part is safe."

Sirius remained unmovable, his breath ragged and wet. He hoped beyond hope that he would wake up from this nightmare and James and Lily would be well and happy. He surveyed James; his hair messy, knotted slightly with a small amount of blood by his temple. His usually bright, happy eyes were shut; he looked like he was merely sleeping. His lips were dry and no breath separated them. Sirius watched his chest and prayed that it would start to rise and fall and give him life but no such thing happened.

A fresh wave of tears spilled onto Sirius's cheeks as he slowly released James's body from his grasp. He lay James gently on the ground where he found him, dug his head into his chest once more. Sirius relented to his emotions and cried as his heart hung heavy with grief. He inhaled a shuddering breath and released James's hand from the grasp he didn't know he had. Sirius looked at him one last lingering time, cupped his face in his hands and said his goodbyes.

"Why did you go without me, James? What am I going to do without you? We were never supposed to go anywhere without each other. You left me alone here and I will never forgive you for that!" he forced out a small, choked laugh and spoke slowly, "I have never been any good without you, mate. You were my partner in crime, but you were also my stronghold, my rock. You were better than me, thanks to Lily in no small part, I'm sure. You always had my back, were always on my side. I will never be the same without you, mate."

He paused, collecting his thoughts and composed himself before giving James one last hug, "This is all my fault. I can't believe I got us all into this mess. I'm sorry."

Sirius allowed Hagrid to lift him to his feet and steer him out of the door and into the garden. The house was too dangerous to stay in and they were not to move the bodies of the dead. Only when Hagrid had placed Sirius on the garden wall did he notice the bundle in his arms.

"Harry," Sirius mumbled throatily.

"Yeh, the little tyke made quite the racket when I picked 'im up!" Hagrid cooed, tickling Harry under his chin. Harry gurgled and giggled and made Sirius's heart lurch - how could he understand what happened, he was only a baby. Sirius fixed Harry with his tearful gaze and he felt a new emotion surfacing.

"What happened to him?" he whispered, his voice shaking with anger.

"Don' seem t'bother 'im very much, t'be hones'" Hagrid replied, pointing at the fresh cut slashed across Harry's forehead, "He cried at firs', bu' it isn' botherin' 'im anymore. Wha's amazin' is tha' tha's the worst of it."

Sirius bore his gaze into Hagrid, but his silence urged him to continue.

"Yeh know why 'e was 'ere tonigh', don' ya Sirius?" Hagrid questioned. There was no need to elaborate on whom they were talking about, there was only one capable of such destruction. Voldemort.

"He was 'ere t'get our Harry, bu' somehow, 'e failed, didn' 'e?"

Sirius stared directly ahead at the crumbling ruins of his former home. He was fighting internally from rushing into its fiery depths, letting it engulf him entirely to replace the grief and sorrow that gripped his chest. It took the determination of every fibre of his being to stop him from running to James and Lily and dragging them out. No one would be able to survive from the smoky vestiges of that house. A rafter from the roof of the house crashed onto the floor of the upper level, making a resounding bang echo through the neighbourhood. Sirius leapt from his place, screaming for his friends as a strong hand held him back and forced him down. Sirius fell to a crumpled pile on the hard earth, his view obscured by smoke and tears.

"Where is Lily?" Sirius asked of Hagrid, "She should be with James. Where is her body?"

"Sirius, yeh can' move 'em. Lily's body is up in 'Arry's room, an' hers isn' the on'y one."

"What do you mean?" Sirius exclaimed.

"Well, like I 'd been sayin', You-Know-Who was 'ere to get Harry. Bu' as yeh can see, Harry is alive and well, 'e survived wit' on'y a cut on 'is forehead. You-Know-Who's body is up there in Harry's room, Harry somehow done away wi' him."

This information took a long time to sink in with Sirius. He held his arms out to Hagrid and he passed Harry to him. Harry's eyes lit up instantly on seeing his beloved godfather and he beamed up at him, incoherent ramblings emitting from his tiny mouth. Sirius smiled sadly at the little boy in his arms and his heart plummeted as he glanced into his eyes - Lily's eyes. He wondered if Harry would hold her gifts, if he would have the same command of rare magic she possessed. Or would he be more like James? He certainly was cut out of his old man. Would he be courageous, loyal and smart? He contemplated that it would be his duty to raise Harry as his own son now that his parents were dead. He was his godfather, after all. 'I hope he is more like his parents than me,' he thought to himself, his heart aching on the thought of poor Harry, never really getting to know his parents. 'I wonder will he remember them at all? I suppose not, he is only a baby. I'll talk about them everyday to him, through me he will have a family.'

Medi-Wizards arrived at that moment. Sirius felt as though an eternity had passed, but it had in reality only been a matter of minutes. They charged into the relics of their home and returned moments later levitating three limp bodies. Sirius could barely support himself, let alone Harry, so he passed the child back to Hagrid and watched as two of his best friends were pronounced dead at the scene and lifted into body bags. Sirius howled as they were driven away, but paused as he looked at the third body.

Funny how death can take away your fears. Had Sirius seen this man hours earlier he would have been too terrified to speak. Looking at him now, lifeless and pale, frankly he looked a little old and weak. Harry yawned quietly in Hagrid's arms, drawing Sirius's attention back onto him.

"Hagrid, perhaps I should take Harry? I am his godfather, after all. We could go and stay with Remus for a while, until I restore the place my Uncle Alphard left me in his will," said Sirius, in an attempt to be strong for his godson. Hagrid contemplated this for a moment before answering.

"Well, I'm on special business fer Dumbledore, Sirius, 'e sent me an Owl not long ago telling' me t' come here an' bring Harry to 'im. 'No exceptions,' he said. Otherwise I would, bu' I'm sure yeh could talk ter Dumbledore yerself."
"Oh," Sirius responded, crestfallen. They sat in silence a while, the fire from the house extinguished by specialists that arrived with the Medi-Wizards. The smell of damp soot filled their nostrils and the distant sound of celebrations hit their ears.

"A momentous night, I suppose," Sirius mused quietly, "the Dark Lord defeated. By Harry Potter, no less. How is it that he survived the curse when every other fully grown Wizard perished? He is going to be famous, don't you think? 'The Boy Who Lived'."

Hagrid chuckled quietly as he rose with Harry in his arms.

"I'd best be off wit' 'The Boy Who Lived,' wouldn' wan' t' keep Dumbledore waitin'. It's goin' t' be a long walk."

Sirius watched Hagrid walk a few paces before he turned to speak.

"D'yeh know wha' I don' understand," Hagrid pondered outloud, "Is how You-Know-Who even found 'em. Dumbledore didn' tell me much, bu' who on earth would do this ter Lily and James?" Hagrid cried, whipping out a large handkerchief and blowing his nose. Hagrid had always been a close friend of the family, had always been so kind to them all in school. He never imagined in a million years that anyone would want to harm them. Comprehension dawned on Sirius, as he watched the giant of a man sob over the loss of Lily and James, he decided what needed to be done.

"Take my bike, I don't like the thought of Harry getting cold from such a long walk," he said crisply while removing his leather jacket and wrapping Harry in it, "I won't be needing it."

"Are yeh sure, Sirius, yeh love tha' bike," Hagrid asked in a surprised tone.

"I won't be needing it, Hagrid, and you have always admired it. Take it as a gesture of my thanks for taking care of Harry," Sirius said with a sigh, running his fingers gently through his godson's soft hair. Hagrid mounted the bike as Sirius muttered an incantation to make sure Harry was safely secured to Hagrid. Hagrid revved the bikes engine and kicked off from the ground, flying quickly into the night sky.

Sirius felt the numbness encompassing his body be replaced with white-hot anger. His body shook with rage and he yelled as he quickly transformed into a great black dog and pounded the pavement with his paws, running as fast as the wind.

A distinct shuffle of leaves was the only clue of his apparation. In order not to arouse suspicion he quickly transformed into the great black shabby dog 'Snuffles.' Sirius didn't know how long he had been walking, but the harsh, unforgiving glare of daylight had replaced the kind understanding of the inky darkness that best suited his mood. A plethora of emotions surged through his body, each of them fighting to expel themselves, but the most powerful feeling Sirius could muster at the moment was anger.

Peter Pettigrew sold them out. Sirius couldn't fathom why Peter would hurt Lily and James. He was responsible for their deaths and was now going to assume their fate. Peter had been their friend for so many years, and Sirius was vexed that he didn't see this coming sooner. Poor whimpering, sniveling, wimpy Pettigrew. Who would have suspected him of being capable of such a crime?

Sirius found himself in Trafalgar Square in London. Peter hadn't counted on Voldemort's failure, he was sure of it. And if Sirius learned anything from befriending that pathetic excuse for a Wizard it was that he was probably heading for their hideout. He would get the train to Hogsmeade and find Peter in the Shrieking Shack, he would get his revenge.

Unbeknownst to Sirius, he would not have to wait that long. Peter Pettigrew stuck out like a sore thumb. Ahead of him, on the packed street right here in London, Peter was to be seen scampering towards the Leaky Cauldron. Peter had his hand on the door of the pub when Sirius seized his opportunity and sent a hex right his way, blood now flowing heavily from a large gash in Peter's outstretched hand. Peter screamed loudly as he saw Sirius bounding towards him, bowling him over. Sirius sat on Peter's chest, pinning his arms to his side as he punched him repeatedly.

"You were their friend!" Sirius yelled, as his fist made contact with Peter's nose, shattering it instantly, "And you betrayed them! Why Peter? What did they do to you?"

Sirius didn't allow Peter to answer as he rose from his position and quickly drew his wand, ignoring the horrified gasps of onlookers who were transfixed at what they were seeing, flouting the rules for using magic in front of Muggles.

"Infindo!" Sirius bellowed, as a large gash ripped Peter's chest where James had cut him not all that long ago. He bled anew, as Sirius shouted "Suffodio," and more cuts formed on Peter's body. Blood was flowing heavily from him now, as he swayed on his feet. It seemed as though he was at death's door; he was losing blood at such an alarming rate that he took his only opportunity to save himself.

"How could you Sirius?" he screamed for the whole street to hear, drawing the attention of the customers of the Leaky Cauldron to pour onto the street, "Lily and James were our friends and you killed them! How could you sell them out to the Dark Lord? MURDERER! CREMABILIS FATALIS!"

Sirius stood baffled for a moment as the words hit him - what Peter didn't know was that these were his own thoughts exactly. If he hadn't had been such a coward and agreed to be secret keeper himself, none of them would be in this mess now. It was in this moment's self-pity that Peter did something to utterly bewilder Sirius. Peter lifted his wand and with his last ounce of energy shouted a spell powerful enough to cause an eruption up the street, slaughtering many innocent bystanders in its wake.

When the dust settled, Sirius scanned the crowds for Peter quickly, but all to be seen was a pile of blood stained robes. Survivors of the attack were screaming and pointing at him as Hit Wizards from the Magical Law Enforcement Squad turned up promptly at the scene. Cornelius Fudge, Junior Minister in the Department of Magical Catastrophes quickly assessed the damage - the carnage of dozens of muggle victims, the many others maimed, and there in a large crater in the middle of the street, stood Sirius Black with his wand drawn.

"Expelliarmus!" Cornelius shouted and Sirius's wand went flying into the air, "Sirius Black, you are under arrest for mass murder and for assisting He Who Must Not Be Named in his attempts to kill Harry Potter, and for killing his parents, Lily and James Potter."

Sirius sank to his knees, all hope lost. The impact of the past few days events streamed in front of him; the prophecy, the Fidelius charm, Lily's vision, James dead, Lily dead, their home in ruins, Harry with a large cut in his forehead, the glint of madness in Peter's eyes as he performed the spell - and now he was to take the blame for it all. Hit Wizards came up behind him and pushed him forcefully to the ground. Sirius's skin grazed on rubble and gritted against his teeth. He could vaguely hear their voices from far away telling him he was going straight to prison for being in league with Lord Voldemort, for being responsible for the deaths of those he loved and that his life as he knew it was over. In a matter of hours his world had fallen to pieces, and all he could do was laugh. The pressure of everything landing on his shoulders finally made him snap, and he laughed as he was hauled away by the Squad and was thrown into Azkaban prison to rot away for the remainder of his days. But there was one glimmer of happiness that Sirius could hold on to - he had achieved his aim, Peter Pettigrew was dead. He had avenged his friend's deaths and Harry would be safe from ever falling into Peter's slimy grasp. Harry would live. That was all that mattered.