To The End Chapter 5: Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough, a final fantasy viii fanfic

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or settting, just the story. I will not make any money from this experence. Just haveing fun!

To The End

Chapter Five: Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us.

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Squall's POV.

The Funeral, Two days later.

Everyone was wearing black. Of course I always wear black, but it still bothered me. I remember Seifer telling me he didn't want anyone to wear black at his funeral. Oh well not like he'll find out. Damnit, I can't take this. It was my turn to talk to him. I walked to the casket and looked down at his pale face. They put make up on him to try and make him look alive. Heh, sick. Seifer would have been pissed if he knew that he was wearing make up. I half chuckled, half sobbed. Shit I'm not crying again. Damnit. Oh well, who the fuck cares anymore? Seifer, my love, is dead. I was more than a little pissed when he betrayed me and his family for Ultimecia, but I forgot and forgiven everything the moment I saw him bleeding on the floor. To think his last thought was that I wasn't here. I was working. All I ever did since the war. I reached forward and touched his face; it was cold. I held back a sob. I had to go. I walked out as calmly as I could, heading for my room and my bottle of whiskey.

Well I hope I'm not mistaken by the news I heard from waking
and it's hard to say I'm shaken, by the choices that I make
and well I find it hard to stay, with the words you say
Oh baby let me in
Well I'll choose this life I've taken, never mind the friends I'm making
And I get a little shaken, because I live my life like this
And well I find it hard to stay, with the words you say
Oh baby let me in
And you can cry all you want to, I don't care how much

I stumbled into my room and searched for the bottle of alcohol I kept when the stress got to be too much. I drunk from the bottle deeply, some spilling from my mouth and running down my chin. I took a breath and tipped the bottle back, drinking some more. I walked, or tried to walk, to my bed taking off my leather shoes and climbing in. I took another drink before setting the whiskey on the table next to my bed. I closed my eyes, trying to sleep. Visions and pictures of Seifer on the floor, bleeding, the happy people below smiling, the sun in my eyes. Jade eyes lifeless, cold lips. My eyes snapped opened.

"Shit." I reached in to my bedside drawer, looking for the sleeping pills. I took another swig of whiskey, the alcohol affecting me already. I found the bottle of pills and struggled to get it open. When I finally did I dumped them into my mouth and drank deeply from the bottle in my hand. I fell into a blissful sleep, wondering idly if I may have just killed myself…oh well.

The amount of pills I'm taking counteracts the booze I'm drinking
and this vanity I'm breaking, lets me live my life like this
and well I find it hard to stay, with the words you say
Oh baby let me in
Well I'll choose the life I've taken, never mind the friends I'm making
and the beauty that I'm faking lets me live my life like this
And well I find it hard to stay, with the words you say
Oh baby let me in
And you can cry all you want to, I don't care how much

Irvine's POV.

When Squall walked out of the funeral I started to worry. The funeral was over not too long after that. I skipped the burial and headed for Squall's room to check on him. I don't need another friend dying from suicide. I reached the door and found it unlocked (thank god) again, and the lights were all off. I made my way through the dark room heading toward Squall's bedroom. I stubbed my toe on his couch and cursed quietly, and hopped the rest of the way to Squall's door. I sighed in relief when through the darkness I saw the sleeping form of Squall sprawled across the bed. For some reason it didn't seem right thought. I walked closer peering at Squall through the darkness. He had a ¾ empty bottle of whiskey and there was a bottle of pills empty on the tabletop.

"God damn; Shit," I said and started to shake Squall, but to no avail. Cursing again I picked him up and sprinted to the infirmary. When I got there, Dr. Tyshe, Kadowaki's assistant, was there. He stood up and ushered me to an empty room, the same one Squall was in before. I set him on the bed.

"He took a bottle of sleeping pills and ¾ a bottle of whiskey," I said, my voice shaking. I would admit it, Squall meant a lot to me. I couldn't stand to see him like this.

"Call Dr. Kadowaki!" he said to some girl, a nurse.

"We'll need to pump his stomach," Dr. Tyshe said, starting to strip Squall. "I think you'll need to wait outside, okay?" he said and continued his work.

"Yeah…" I said walking out, bumping into another nurse on the way. She scowled at me then went into the room I just came from. I kept walking, then went to the phone, dialing Selphie's number.

"Hello?" came a questioning and tired voice.

"Selph, Squall...he took pills." I said my voice cracking.

"Oh god."

"Could you tell everyone to meet at your room? It's time for a meeting," I said.

"Yeah sure Irvy." Selphie said.

"Thank You." I loved Selphie so much, especially at times like these; she was like a sister to me.

"You're such a good friend Irvy, you've done nothing but take care of Squall since his breakdown," Selphie said with a serious tone.

"Yeah, see you soon," I replied.

"Bye."

"Okay, we've got to do something," I said, watching as the gang sat at the table, sad and concerned looks adorned all their faces.

"Yeah, Squall defiantly needs a vacation," Zell said.

"What about Sir. Laguna! He said Squall could come visit him!" Selphie suggested.

"Yeah, good idea," I said, smiling at Selphie.

"I think Irvine should go with him," Quistis said, sipping at her water.

"Yeah Irvine, you're the best person to go." Selphie said, patting my shoulder.

"Yeah okay, Quistis, you call and make arrangements. Tomorrow me and Squall are going to Esthar," I said.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Selphie asked, her voice a whisper.

I patted her back, "Don't worry, he'll be okay. He was just shocked when Seifer came back…in that fashion," I suggested. Even to me it sounded suspicious.

"Speaking of that bastard, how did he get into Garden so easily? Why would Squall try to commit suicide just because he came killed himself? I thought they hated each other?" Zell asked, standing up and punching the table.

"Calm down Zell, there's more to Squall and Seifer's relationship then you know, and before you ask, no I'm not telling you what. Squall will when he feels he is ready to."

Quistis said, "Well I'm going to call President Loire, then I'm going to bed, see you guys later." She got up, gave Selphie a hug and waved bye, exiting. Zell followed her footsteps soon after. I jumped when two skinny arms wrapped around my shoulders.

"It will be okay, just like you said Irvy. It will turn out just fine," Selphie said, consoling the both of us.

"Yeah It will." I hope.

You'll invest yourself in me, we're not working out
And you can't keep my brother, and you won't fuck my friends
and we're not working out, we're not working out
This time I mean it, never mind the times I've seen it

Never again, never again
Oh baby let me in, I'm knocking let me in

To Be Continued…

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oo Lyrics are ' Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us' by My Chemical Romance.

Author's Notes: Here is another chapter for you all! Thank you to:

Gothic Angel Eyes: You guessed it! Of course Irvine and Squall are going to Laguna's! I must say though it will be a long painful process before Squall is ready for a relationship, and that means angst! But it doesn't mean no sex! . (Okay a it does a little bit, but just for awhile) Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

Virulent Enmity: Thank you so much! Yes dramatic, I've got a thing for dramatic! Of course your review made a difference every review I reciive makes a diffrence, don't tell anyone but...whispers yours are extra special:d

Ryu the Youkai: I really hope your subconcious doesn't want you to die! I like dark stuff to, but usually I have to even out with something fluffy in a different story or something! . Thanks I love that comment you made: "...Pretty" This will hopefully be vary dark throughout. I hope you enjoy it!

And special thanks to:

Lion's Strife: Thank you soooo much for betaing this stuff, your a big help! Everyone go read her stuff! AND review ! She also helped with the revision of chapter 8 (if you haven't read please read.)

Thank you everyone else who reads and likes my work! If you leave a review I would be able to properly thank you! wink If not you reading is good enough.

For I'm No Angel fans: Chapter 9 is on the way! There was a small mix up with one of my betas, It was totally my fault. I sent her the wrong chapter. So there was a delay in udateing, but everything is back in business and chapter nine should be up soon! Thank you all!

Please Read & Review.