Spyro meets Nazza
N.B. Spyro the Dragon and associated characters belong to *Sony*, Universal Studios in particular/
Nazza is a creation from the mind of Nazza/
Moby and Guy are other creations from the mind of Nazza, do not use them without my permission/
[CHAPTER 6: HURRICOS]
'Yeah.'
'Nah.'
'Yeah.'
'Okay.'
Spyro and Nazza left through the portal, and arrived back at Summer Forest.
'Of to Hurricos?' asked Nazza.
'Yep,' said Spyro.
They ran to the Hurricos portal and entered.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
They appeared in Hurricos. It was pouring rain.
'Great weather,' said Nazza.
'It's usually raining,' said Spyro, 'but not this heavily!'
'Did you bring an umbrella?'
'Does it *look* like I'm carrying an umbrella?' said Spyro.
One of the little nerdy people with glasses walked up. 'Quick, follow me! You need to get out of the rain!'
'Why should we?' shouted Nazza.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
They reached the house of the little...thing. 'Why did we have to get out of the rain?' Spyro asked.
'Because,' said the little guy, 'the rain has gone weird lately.'
'Really?' said Nazza.
'Yeah. Somehow it was poisoned,' said the little guy.
'Poisoned?'
'Well sort of,' said the little guy, whose name turned out to be Guy.
'What do you mean, sort of?' said Spyro.
'Somehow it was infected,' said Guy. 'Whenever you're in the rain, you get angry for no reason.'
'Doesn't it always rain here?' said Nazza.
'Exactly,' said Guy. 'That's why we need your help, Spyro.'
'What about me?'
'I don't know you.'
'Oh yeah?' Nazza ran up to him and kicked him in the balls. He flew through the air and hit the wall.
'Ow,' said Guy.
'Nazza doesn't like it when people don't recognise him,' said Spyro. 'After all, he's as good an adventurer as me.'
'But he kicked me in the balls!'
'That doesn't matter,' said Spyro.
'So, how can we help you?' said Nazza.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'There are five cogs scattered over Hurricos,' said Guy. 'You must find them and bring them to me.'
'What's our reward?' asked Nazza.
'A strange key I found,' said Guy.
'Okay,' said Spyro.
'Where are these cogs?' asked Nazza.
'I don't know,' said Guy. 'You can have this strange gadget. It keeps track of the cogs.'
'Okay,' said Spyro, taking the device. 'Come on, Nazza, let's get going!'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The two walked out into the rain.
'Where should we go now?' asked Nazza.
'Yeah,' said Spyro agitatedly. 'Just ask me. Rely on me for *everything*.'
'Well, *Spyro,*' said Nazza even more agitatedly, 'you're the one who has the thingy that finds the cogs!'
'You can find them *yourself* then,' said Spyro.
'Uh, I forgot this,' said Guy.
'What did you forget *this* time?' said Nazza.
'Have this umbrella,' said Guy. 'And if you don't like it you can pi-'
'Go away,' said Spyro.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Look!' said Nazza. 'There's one of the cogs!'
'Good work,' said Spyro. Nazza picked up the cog, and Spyro opened their journal. Nazza dropped the cog in, and it magically disappeared.
'Wow, that was cool,' said Nazza.
'Yeah, fortunately the PlayStation can handle good special effects, unlike *some* un-named consoles,' said Spyro.
Spyro coughed, and the flames formed the word 'Nintendo'.
Meanwhile, in the land of Nintendo, a dragon coughed, and his flames formed the word 'Mymtendoc'.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Okay, where's the next cog?' Nazza asked.
'It's a little walk from here,' said Spyro.
'That's good,' said Nazza. 'For once we're doing something easy.'
They walked to where the cog was, to find Luigi holding the cog. 'Doh!' said Nazza.
'You can't have this-a cog,'said Luigi.
'How did you know we were looking for cogs?' asked Spyro.
'I didn't-a,' said Luigi. 'It was-a in my programming.'
'Hang on a minute,' said Nazza. 'Aren't you a Nintendo character?'
Suddenly Luigi fell down a plothole.
'Another easy cog,' said Spyro.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'The next cog is a bit further on in the level,' said Spyro.
They walked a bit further, and found a group of weird things throwing the cog around.
'Uh, excuse me, weird things,' said Nazza, 'but can we have that cog?'
The "weird things" stared at the two for a while. They seemed angry.
'Yeah, sure, here you go.'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Two more,' said Spyro.
'Excuse me!' said Nazza. 'But so far *I'VE* got all the cogs and -'
'Get back under the umbrella.'
They stopped walking for a second. 'Where's the next cog?'
'I...don't know,' said Spyro.
Suddenly Guy appeared out of nowhere. 'Here's the last two cogs!'
'Good,' said Spyro. 'Give them to us.'
'NO!' said Guy. 'Why should *YOU* get them?'
'Because you're the one who wants the five cogs,' said Spyro.
'That makes no sense,' said Nazza.
'Says *YOU*,' said Guy.
Guy handed Spyro the two cogs, then handed the five cogs back to Guy. 'And here's your key for your reward,' said Guy.
=============================1 Key(s) Found==============================
'Follow me back to my house,' said Guy.
They followed him back to his house.
'Do those five cogs activate a machine that turns the rain back to normal?' asked Spyro.
'No,' said Guy. 'They are parts for my heater.'
0_____0
'Wow,' said Nazza. 'That's the first time one of those funny faces has been used in this story!'
'The first time its been used ever,' said Spyro. 'Minus the people that use them.'
'So, how do we get the other two keys?' asked Nazza.
'How would I know?' said Guy. 'I just wanted my heater to work again.
0_____0
'Heehee, that's funny,' said Nazza.
'Hang on,' said Guy. 'I might know how you could get a key...'
'How?' asked Spyro.
'Steal it off someone while they're out of their house!' said Guy.
'Uh, I think we'll be leaving now...' said Spyro.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'We should've brought an umbrella,' said Nazza.
'*YOU* should've brought an umbrella!' said Spyro angrily.
'You know I could kick your -'
'Hey guys, what are you doing?'
Spyro and Nazza stared at him for a few seconds.
'Who are you?' asked Nazza.
'I am Moby, the happy man!' said the person.
Spyro and Nazza slowly backed away.
'I had too much antidepressants, now I'm Super-Happy!'
Spyro and Nazza turned and ran away.
'Wait! I can help you get a key!'
The two stopped, and slowly turned back around.
'How?' shouted Spyro.
'I can help you stop this rain of depressing-ness!'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Well, "Moby", how can we help?' said Spyro, looking around his house.
'I know how the rain of depressing-ness was caused,' said Moby.
'*Yawn*, we don't want to hear your life story,' said Nazza.
'Continue,' said Spyro.
'There are these funny monster things that I have nicknamed "Joes".'
'Why did you do that?' asked Nazza.
'At first they seem cool, but after a while they get really annoying,' said Moby.
'I think a more appropriate name would be "Amy Roses",' said Nazza.
'Okay, here's what you have to do,' said Moby. 'One of my men has been captured by these "Joes".'
'You're an army general?' said Nazza.
'What makes you think that? Anyway, if you can invade the base and get to the inner courtyard of their fortress, I will give you a key. This key can be used to open all the doors. Or you can just charge at the doors and break them.'
'I think that's the better option,' said Spyro.
'What do we do once we're inside the inner courtyard?'
'You invade the fortress further,' said Moby. 'And when you get to the inner most room, you'll find someone tied up to a machine of some sort. Free him and he will give you another key.'
'Goodie,' said Spyro.
'Let's go then,' said Nazza. The two walked out. 'Hang on, shouldn't we have asked where this big fortress is?'
'No need,' said Spyro. He nodded his head in the direction of a gigantic (and I mean gigantic) fortress, surrounded by at least five barbed-wire fences and beyond them three stone walls enclosing off the fortress.
'Wow, I'll bet someone real rich lives there.'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Spyro and Nazza walked up to the barbed-wire fences. 'Great,' said Spyro. 'We have to get through these five fences, then three more walls.'
'It's all *YOUR* fault,' said Nazza.
Moby ran up to them. 'Here, take these watches, they make you immune to the rain.'
'They're probably poisoned watches,' muttered Nazza as he and Spyro put them on. 'Hey, this does work.'
'Hey, look! I found a way to get past the barbed-wire fences!' said Spyro. He pointed to a hole dug underneath each fence. 'Looks like someone's been here before.'
'Who was it?'
'How would I know?'
'I don't know!'
They crawled under the holes to come to the stone walls. 'How do we get past *these*?' said Nazza.
'They have doors,' said Spyro.
Nazza sighed. 'We'd better get some harder challenges later on.'
They walked into the fortress, to find a whole lot of annoying creatures. 'I can see why they're called "Joes".'
'Because they're annoying?'
'No, because they're ducks.'
The ducks advanced on them. Nazza and Spyro looked at each other, nodded, then leapt into karate mode.
Several minutes later, the ducks were all lying on the ground, defeated. 'That was easy,' said Nazza.
'Yeah, because all you did was constantly karate-chop one in the head until he passed away!'
'But he looked so evil! I just had to do it!'
Spyro shook his head. 'Let's go into the next room.'
They walked into the next room to find more ducks. 'Aw, crap,' said Spyro.
'Yeah, more of the evil little buggers.'
'No, the floor's covered in duck crap.'
'Eww! I'm not wearing any shoes!'
'Me either.'
'That's it, I'm going to have to take a stand!'
'I don't see any around - oh, I see. You meant it metaphorically, not literally.'
'What the hell are you talking about?'
Nazza picked up a pile of the crap, and threw it at the nearest clan of ducks. They all started quacking frantically, running around and slamming into each other with the force of a steam roller.
'Cool! They don't like this crap!' said Spyro.
They started picking it up and throwing it. Pretty soon the ducks had all wiped themselves out.
'Aw, great, now I have shit on my hands!' said Nazza.
'I don't recall shit being fluoro green,' said Spyro.
'No, that's not the shit. I'm talking about the brown bits.'
'I thought they were just chocolate stains.'
'No, it's shit alright,' said Nazza. 'But do you want to lick it just in case?'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
After several rooms of insane duck attacks, they finally got to the inner courtyard.
'*Phew*,' said Nazza. 'Now where's our key?'
Suddenly Moby ran up behind them. 'Here is your key,' he said.
==============================2 Keys Found==============================
'Hang on a sec,' said Spyro as Nazza put the key in the magic journal. 'How come you made us come in here, when you're already half way?'
'Because I'm too happy to go on and rescue my friend! That's up to you!' Then Moby turned and ran away as fast as he could.
'Well, there's a big wooden door into the inner-part of the fortress,' said Nazza. 'You know what that means.'
'Yep,' said Spyro. 'I'll have to charge.'
Spyro charged at the door and broke it down. 'Oh no, not more Joes!'
'How are we going to get rid of them?' asked Nazza as they slowly advanced on the pair.
'Flame them!' shouted Spyro.
Spyro shot out flame and destroyed a few of the ducks, but Nazza was standing still. 'Oh yeah,' said Spyro. 'I forgot you can't shoot flame out of your nose.'
'That's what you think,' said Nazza. He pulled out a tablet and swallowed it.
'Nazza! Now isn't the time to get high!'
'I'm not getting high,' said Nazza. 'This is a special tablet that gives me special powers.'
'What would those powers be?'
'It makes me sneeze a lot,' said Nazza. 'And each sneeze shoots out fire.'
Suddenly Nazza began sneezing uncontrollably, and set alight all of the ducks. Unfortunately, he couldn't stop sneezing, and set fire to the whole place.
When he had finally finished sneezing, he said, 'Okay, I think we should go into the next room now.'
Spyro charged down the door, and to their surprise, they didn't come across an empty room full of annoying little ducks.
They came across a room with a box-shaped machine with someone tied up to it, and several annoying little ducks.
'I'll take care of the ducks,' said Spyro, 'you take care of the guy tied up to that machine.'
'Hurry up!' said the guy tied up to the machine. 'This box-shaped machine is a bomb!'
Nazza untied him, and Spyro destroyed all the ducks. 'Quick, run!' shouted the guy whose name was Steve.
They ran, and in slow-mo, the fortress exploded. Which was weird, as everything else wasn't slow-mo.
They finally made it to the barbed-wire fences, and just jumped over them (gravity seemed to be playing up). They escaped before the whole thing collapsed and was destroyed.
'That was cool,' said Nazza.
'I believe you have a key for us,' said Spyro.
'Me?' said Steve. 'Okay, here you go.'
==============================3 Keys Found==============================
'Now we just need to find the gems,' said Nazza.
'I'll help,' said Steve.
'And me!' said Moby.
'Where'd you come from?' asked Spyro.
'Who are you?' asked Steve.
'It's-a me, Mario!' said Moby. 'I mean, uh, um, uh-oh...'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'So it was Mario all along,' said Moby.
'How come Moby's here, but there's also Mario?' asked Spyro.
'I'm confused...' said Nazza.
'He posed as me,' said Moby. 'I went on a holiday, and just came back. It seems Mario was posing as me, so that he could get rid of Spyro and Nazza and Steve.'
'But why are you getting revenge on us?' said Spyro.
'Because your games are considered a clone of Mario 64,' said Mario. 'And Spyro is better than Mario 64.'
'Super Mario 64,' Steve corrected.
'So I decided to kill my arch-nemesis,' said Mario.
'But isn't your arch-nemesis Bowser or something?' said Nazza.
'How the hell would I know?' said Mario.
'Well,' said Moby, 'now you must die.' He pulled out a ripper (from Unreal Tournament, the gun with the sharp disc-like blades). He fired at Mario several times, and the dust hid his body for a few seconds.
When the dust had disappeared, they found...nothing.
'How is that possible?' said Moby. 'Mario should be ripped to shreds!'
'Hmm, seems to me like he fell down a plothole just in time,' said Nazza.
'Well,' said Steve, 'let's help these guys find the gems!'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The rain had disappeared with the destruction of the fortress, and Nazza and Spyro were on their way, having collected all 400 gems.
'See you later!' said Nazza.
'You too,' said Moby and Steve.
They walked through the portal...
===Spyro and Nazza's Journal===
[PAGE 6]
=Hurricos=
Gems: 400
Keys: 4/4
(1) Heater Cogs
(2) Fortress Infiltration
(3) Steve Rescue
(4) 400 Gems
=======================================================================
Next Chapter: Who feels like a trip to the beach?
Did you Know? There are 3 worlds in Spyro 2: Gateway to Glimmer, and each one is named after a season.
N.B. Spyro the Dragon and associated characters belong to *Sony*, Universal Studios in particular/
Nazza is a creation from the mind of Nazza/
Moby and Guy are other creations from the mind of Nazza, do not use them without my permission/
[CHAPTER 6: HURRICOS]
'Yeah.'
'Nah.'
'Yeah.'
'Okay.'
Spyro and Nazza left through the portal, and arrived back at Summer Forest.
'Of to Hurricos?' asked Nazza.
'Yep,' said Spyro.
They ran to the Hurricos portal and entered.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
They appeared in Hurricos. It was pouring rain.
'Great weather,' said Nazza.
'It's usually raining,' said Spyro, 'but not this heavily!'
'Did you bring an umbrella?'
'Does it *look* like I'm carrying an umbrella?' said Spyro.
One of the little nerdy people with glasses walked up. 'Quick, follow me! You need to get out of the rain!'
'Why should we?' shouted Nazza.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
They reached the house of the little...thing. 'Why did we have to get out of the rain?' Spyro asked.
'Because,' said the little guy, 'the rain has gone weird lately.'
'Really?' said Nazza.
'Yeah. Somehow it was poisoned,' said the little guy.
'Poisoned?'
'Well sort of,' said the little guy, whose name turned out to be Guy.
'What do you mean, sort of?' said Spyro.
'Somehow it was infected,' said Guy. 'Whenever you're in the rain, you get angry for no reason.'
'Doesn't it always rain here?' said Nazza.
'Exactly,' said Guy. 'That's why we need your help, Spyro.'
'What about me?'
'I don't know you.'
'Oh yeah?' Nazza ran up to him and kicked him in the balls. He flew through the air and hit the wall.
'Ow,' said Guy.
'Nazza doesn't like it when people don't recognise him,' said Spyro. 'After all, he's as good an adventurer as me.'
'But he kicked me in the balls!'
'That doesn't matter,' said Spyro.
'So, how can we help you?' said Nazza.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'There are five cogs scattered over Hurricos,' said Guy. 'You must find them and bring them to me.'
'What's our reward?' asked Nazza.
'A strange key I found,' said Guy.
'Okay,' said Spyro.
'Where are these cogs?' asked Nazza.
'I don't know,' said Guy. 'You can have this strange gadget. It keeps track of the cogs.'
'Okay,' said Spyro, taking the device. 'Come on, Nazza, let's get going!'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The two walked out into the rain.
'Where should we go now?' asked Nazza.
'Yeah,' said Spyro agitatedly. 'Just ask me. Rely on me for *everything*.'
'Well, *Spyro,*' said Nazza even more agitatedly, 'you're the one who has the thingy that finds the cogs!'
'You can find them *yourself* then,' said Spyro.
'Uh, I forgot this,' said Guy.
'What did you forget *this* time?' said Nazza.
'Have this umbrella,' said Guy. 'And if you don't like it you can pi-'
'Go away,' said Spyro.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Look!' said Nazza. 'There's one of the cogs!'
'Good work,' said Spyro. Nazza picked up the cog, and Spyro opened their journal. Nazza dropped the cog in, and it magically disappeared.
'Wow, that was cool,' said Nazza.
'Yeah, fortunately the PlayStation can handle good special effects, unlike *some* un-named consoles,' said Spyro.
Spyro coughed, and the flames formed the word 'Nintendo'.
Meanwhile, in the land of Nintendo, a dragon coughed, and his flames formed the word 'Mymtendoc'.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Okay, where's the next cog?' Nazza asked.
'It's a little walk from here,' said Spyro.
'That's good,' said Nazza. 'For once we're doing something easy.'
They walked to where the cog was, to find Luigi holding the cog. 'Doh!' said Nazza.
'You can't have this-a cog,'said Luigi.
'How did you know we were looking for cogs?' asked Spyro.
'I didn't-a,' said Luigi. 'It was-a in my programming.'
'Hang on a minute,' said Nazza. 'Aren't you a Nintendo character?'
Suddenly Luigi fell down a plothole.
'Another easy cog,' said Spyro.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'The next cog is a bit further on in the level,' said Spyro.
They walked a bit further, and found a group of weird things throwing the cog around.
'Uh, excuse me, weird things,' said Nazza, 'but can we have that cog?'
The "weird things" stared at the two for a while. They seemed angry.
'Yeah, sure, here you go.'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Two more,' said Spyro.
'Excuse me!' said Nazza. 'But so far *I'VE* got all the cogs and -'
'Get back under the umbrella.'
They stopped walking for a second. 'Where's the next cog?'
'I...don't know,' said Spyro.
Suddenly Guy appeared out of nowhere. 'Here's the last two cogs!'
'Good,' said Spyro. 'Give them to us.'
'NO!' said Guy. 'Why should *YOU* get them?'
'Because you're the one who wants the five cogs,' said Spyro.
'That makes no sense,' said Nazza.
'Says *YOU*,' said Guy.
Guy handed Spyro the two cogs, then handed the five cogs back to Guy. 'And here's your key for your reward,' said Guy.
=============================1 Key(s) Found==============================
'Follow me back to my house,' said Guy.
They followed him back to his house.
'Do those five cogs activate a machine that turns the rain back to normal?' asked Spyro.
'No,' said Guy. 'They are parts for my heater.'
0_____0
'Wow,' said Nazza. 'That's the first time one of those funny faces has been used in this story!'
'The first time its been used ever,' said Spyro. 'Minus the people that use them.'
'So, how do we get the other two keys?' asked Nazza.
'How would I know?' said Guy. 'I just wanted my heater to work again.
0_____0
'Heehee, that's funny,' said Nazza.
'Hang on,' said Guy. 'I might know how you could get a key...'
'How?' asked Spyro.
'Steal it off someone while they're out of their house!' said Guy.
'Uh, I think we'll be leaving now...' said Spyro.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'We should've brought an umbrella,' said Nazza.
'*YOU* should've brought an umbrella!' said Spyro angrily.
'You know I could kick your -'
'Hey guys, what are you doing?'
Spyro and Nazza stared at him for a few seconds.
'Who are you?' asked Nazza.
'I am Moby, the happy man!' said the person.
Spyro and Nazza slowly backed away.
'I had too much antidepressants, now I'm Super-Happy!'
Spyro and Nazza turned and ran away.
'Wait! I can help you get a key!'
The two stopped, and slowly turned back around.
'How?' shouted Spyro.
'I can help you stop this rain of depressing-ness!'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'Well, "Moby", how can we help?' said Spyro, looking around his house.
'I know how the rain of depressing-ness was caused,' said Moby.
'*Yawn*, we don't want to hear your life story,' said Nazza.
'Continue,' said Spyro.
'There are these funny monster things that I have nicknamed "Joes".'
'Why did you do that?' asked Nazza.
'At first they seem cool, but after a while they get really annoying,' said Moby.
'I think a more appropriate name would be "Amy Roses",' said Nazza.
'Okay, here's what you have to do,' said Moby. 'One of my men has been captured by these "Joes".'
'You're an army general?' said Nazza.
'What makes you think that? Anyway, if you can invade the base and get to the inner courtyard of their fortress, I will give you a key. This key can be used to open all the doors. Or you can just charge at the doors and break them.'
'I think that's the better option,' said Spyro.
'What do we do once we're inside the inner courtyard?'
'You invade the fortress further,' said Moby. 'And when you get to the inner most room, you'll find someone tied up to a machine of some sort. Free him and he will give you another key.'
'Goodie,' said Spyro.
'Let's go then,' said Nazza. The two walked out. 'Hang on, shouldn't we have asked where this big fortress is?'
'No need,' said Spyro. He nodded his head in the direction of a gigantic (and I mean gigantic) fortress, surrounded by at least five barbed-wire fences and beyond them three stone walls enclosing off the fortress.
'Wow, I'll bet someone real rich lives there.'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Spyro and Nazza walked up to the barbed-wire fences. 'Great,' said Spyro. 'We have to get through these five fences, then three more walls.'
'It's all *YOUR* fault,' said Nazza.
Moby ran up to them. 'Here, take these watches, they make you immune to the rain.'
'They're probably poisoned watches,' muttered Nazza as he and Spyro put them on. 'Hey, this does work.'
'Hey, look! I found a way to get past the barbed-wire fences!' said Spyro. He pointed to a hole dug underneath each fence. 'Looks like someone's been here before.'
'Who was it?'
'How would I know?'
'I don't know!'
They crawled under the holes to come to the stone walls. 'How do we get past *these*?' said Nazza.
'They have doors,' said Spyro.
Nazza sighed. 'We'd better get some harder challenges later on.'
They walked into the fortress, to find a whole lot of annoying creatures. 'I can see why they're called "Joes".'
'Because they're annoying?'
'No, because they're ducks.'
The ducks advanced on them. Nazza and Spyro looked at each other, nodded, then leapt into karate mode.
Several minutes later, the ducks were all lying on the ground, defeated. 'That was easy,' said Nazza.
'Yeah, because all you did was constantly karate-chop one in the head until he passed away!'
'But he looked so evil! I just had to do it!'
Spyro shook his head. 'Let's go into the next room.'
They walked into the next room to find more ducks. 'Aw, crap,' said Spyro.
'Yeah, more of the evil little buggers.'
'No, the floor's covered in duck crap.'
'Eww! I'm not wearing any shoes!'
'Me either.'
'That's it, I'm going to have to take a stand!'
'I don't see any around - oh, I see. You meant it metaphorically, not literally.'
'What the hell are you talking about?'
Nazza picked up a pile of the crap, and threw it at the nearest clan of ducks. They all started quacking frantically, running around and slamming into each other with the force of a steam roller.
'Cool! They don't like this crap!' said Spyro.
They started picking it up and throwing it. Pretty soon the ducks had all wiped themselves out.
'Aw, great, now I have shit on my hands!' said Nazza.
'I don't recall shit being fluoro green,' said Spyro.
'No, that's not the shit. I'm talking about the brown bits.'
'I thought they were just chocolate stains.'
'No, it's shit alright,' said Nazza. 'But do you want to lick it just in case?'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
After several rooms of insane duck attacks, they finally got to the inner courtyard.
'*Phew*,' said Nazza. 'Now where's our key?'
Suddenly Moby ran up behind them. 'Here is your key,' he said.
==============================2 Keys Found==============================
'Hang on a sec,' said Spyro as Nazza put the key in the magic journal. 'How come you made us come in here, when you're already half way?'
'Because I'm too happy to go on and rescue my friend! That's up to you!' Then Moby turned and ran away as fast as he could.
'Well, there's a big wooden door into the inner-part of the fortress,' said Nazza. 'You know what that means.'
'Yep,' said Spyro. 'I'll have to charge.'
Spyro charged at the door and broke it down. 'Oh no, not more Joes!'
'How are we going to get rid of them?' asked Nazza as they slowly advanced on the pair.
'Flame them!' shouted Spyro.
Spyro shot out flame and destroyed a few of the ducks, but Nazza was standing still. 'Oh yeah,' said Spyro. 'I forgot you can't shoot flame out of your nose.'
'That's what you think,' said Nazza. He pulled out a tablet and swallowed it.
'Nazza! Now isn't the time to get high!'
'I'm not getting high,' said Nazza. 'This is a special tablet that gives me special powers.'
'What would those powers be?'
'It makes me sneeze a lot,' said Nazza. 'And each sneeze shoots out fire.'
Suddenly Nazza began sneezing uncontrollably, and set alight all of the ducks. Unfortunately, he couldn't stop sneezing, and set fire to the whole place.
When he had finally finished sneezing, he said, 'Okay, I think we should go into the next room now.'
Spyro charged down the door, and to their surprise, they didn't come across an empty room full of annoying little ducks.
They came across a room with a box-shaped machine with someone tied up to it, and several annoying little ducks.
'I'll take care of the ducks,' said Spyro, 'you take care of the guy tied up to that machine.'
'Hurry up!' said the guy tied up to the machine. 'This box-shaped machine is a bomb!'
Nazza untied him, and Spyro destroyed all the ducks. 'Quick, run!' shouted the guy whose name was Steve.
They ran, and in slow-mo, the fortress exploded. Which was weird, as everything else wasn't slow-mo.
They finally made it to the barbed-wire fences, and just jumped over them (gravity seemed to be playing up). They escaped before the whole thing collapsed and was destroyed.
'That was cool,' said Nazza.
'I believe you have a key for us,' said Spyro.
'Me?' said Steve. 'Okay, here you go.'
==============================3 Keys Found==============================
'Now we just need to find the gems,' said Nazza.
'I'll help,' said Steve.
'And me!' said Moby.
'Where'd you come from?' asked Spyro.
'Who are you?' asked Steve.
'It's-a me, Mario!' said Moby. 'I mean, uh, um, uh-oh...'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
'So it was Mario all along,' said Moby.
'How come Moby's here, but there's also Mario?' asked Spyro.
'I'm confused...' said Nazza.
'He posed as me,' said Moby. 'I went on a holiday, and just came back. It seems Mario was posing as me, so that he could get rid of Spyro and Nazza and Steve.'
'But why are you getting revenge on us?' said Spyro.
'Because your games are considered a clone of Mario 64,' said Mario. 'And Spyro is better than Mario 64.'
'Super Mario 64,' Steve corrected.
'So I decided to kill my arch-nemesis,' said Mario.
'But isn't your arch-nemesis Bowser or something?' said Nazza.
'How the hell would I know?' said Mario.
'Well,' said Moby, 'now you must die.' He pulled out a ripper (from Unreal Tournament, the gun with the sharp disc-like blades). He fired at Mario several times, and the dust hid his body for a few seconds.
When the dust had disappeared, they found...nothing.
'How is that possible?' said Moby. 'Mario should be ripped to shreds!'
'Hmm, seems to me like he fell down a plothole just in time,' said Nazza.
'Well,' said Steve, 'let's help these guys find the gems!'
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The rain had disappeared with the destruction of the fortress, and Nazza and Spyro were on their way, having collected all 400 gems.
'See you later!' said Nazza.
'You too,' said Moby and Steve.
They walked through the portal...
===Spyro and Nazza's Journal===
[PAGE 6]
=Hurricos=
Gems: 400
Keys: 4/4
(1) Heater Cogs
(2) Fortress Infiltration
(3) Steve Rescue
(4) 400 Gems
=======================================================================
Next Chapter: Who feels like a trip to the beach?
Did you Know? There are 3 worlds in Spyro 2: Gateway to Glimmer, and each one is named after a season.