Note: I do not own Love Hina or any other intellectual properties. They are all copyrights of their respectful owners. The rest, however, is MINE, BEE-YOTCHES!

WARNING: These bits of fan fiction are completely strewn with random and mindless humor. Read at your own risk.

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GYRAX Presents…

Love Hina: BakaFictions to Go

Chapter 10: Mutsumi, the Yoga Instructor?

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"Sarah, can you get the door?" Naru shouted from the second floor.

"Yeah, Yeah." Sarah responded. She went to open the front door at the lobby, but not before taking out a match and incinerating the coffee table. When she opened the door, she saw Mutsumi, cheerful as usual. "Well, if it isn't our favorite anemic."

"Hi everyone!" Mutsumi said with enthusiasm. "This is Mutsumi Otohime saying 'Don't play with fire'!"

With that, Sarah lit Mutsumi's hair ablaze.

A minute later, Keitaro and the others came down, picking up a weird scent.

"I smell something." Keitaro spoke. "I smell a smelly smell that smells… smelly."

Motoko covered her nose in disgust. "UGH! Oh, Lordy-Lordy! Something reeks of burned rubber, olive oil, and something that came out of Tom Green's ass!"

"I couldn't have said that better, myself." Kitsune added.

The Hinata crew then sees Mutsumi lying on the floor, with her hair all messy and singed.

"Hi, Mutsumi." Naru said. "Are you… all right?"

Mutsumi quickly recovered. "Oh! Yes, I am. Thanks. I just came to tell you I just became a certified Yoga instructor. If you want me to, I could teach you a few poses, beginner's poses, of course."

Later, the Hinata crew sat in front of Mutsumi on the roof; everyone was sitting pretzel style with his or her legs crossed.

Mutsumi spoke. "Everyone ready?"

They all nod their heads.

"Okay." She responded. "Now take the bottom of your right foot, and place it on the small of your back."

They followed, but not without screaming in GREAT AGONY.

Mutsumi continued. "Then, you take your left leg, and throw it over your neck like a cheap scarf."

They followed again, but not without screaming in GREAT AGONY.

Mutsumi continued. "Now put your head up your ass, and relaaaaaaaaaaaaaax." She paused for a moment. "Wow. That last part was only a joke; I never thought they'd take it literally."

Sarah pulled out a match and… FWOOOOOOOOM! She lit a fart; flames shot out and burnt Naru to a nice, black crisp.

Naru looked at her. "Okay, that SO wasn't cool…"

FWOOOOOOOOM! Sarah lit another fart; flames shot out and burnt Naru to a nicer, blacker crisp.

Keitaro turned to Su. "Su? You ever heard of 'Imitatable Acts'?"

"Joe Ezterhas." Kitsune interjected.

Suddenly, Keitaro heard a pop. "CRAP! I JUST BROKE MY ASS BONES!"

"Umm," Naru replied. "You don't have any ass bones."

"Yessuh!" Keitaro snapped back. "Three months ago, I went to the hospital because I had a FRACTURED ASS!"

"Ezterhas." Kitsune interjected.

"WHAT SHAPE AM I IN IF I CAN'T EVEN RELAX?" Keitaro cried out.

"Aah!" Mutsumi got up. "That was great. I feel like a muffin basket full of rainbow kisses!" She turns to the others. "Alright everyone! Class is over for today! Stand up and stretch!"

A momentary pause fills the air.

"What is it?" Mutsumi asked in curiosity.

Keitaro looked at her funny. "I think we should have stretched BEFORE class, because… WE'RE MOTHER----ING STUCK!" Indeed, they were, for they couldn't move from their yoga poses at all. "Add to it I just broke my ass bones!"

"I know what to do!" Mutsumi chirped.

Later, in the lobby, Naru was hung by her shirt with glitter all over her, and still in her yoga pose. You'd have to admit it: she made a pretty damn fine disco ball. "This is SO not cool."

"Everybody dance!" Mutsumi said. "Wait. That's right; you cant. Sorry about that."

Sarah pulled out a match and lit Naru on fire.

End Chapter 10

Nothing like random humor to cheer someone up, eh?

Review now and I'll put up chapter 11.

Kanako, the Ancient Name of a Regular Hot Topic Shopper