Chapter One:
Kagome, Shippou and Inuyasha entered Kaede's hut only to find that Miroku, Sango, and Kilala had returned from the hot springs.
"Welcome back Kagome-sama." The monk greeted her with a warm smile as she plopped down next to Sango. Sango handed her a cup of tea then continued polishing her weapon as Miroku pulled out a small shard from the layers of his robe.
"Here you go. There was a rather irksome skunk demon two villages yonder. It's too bad you weren't there then Sango wouldn't have had to waste time sorting through it's remains to find the shard." Kagome purified the jewel shard and put it with the rest of her shards bringing the number of shards they had to a whopping five.
"Inuyasha, we heard rumors of a jewel shard just north of Kaede's village. It appears there have been some demons terrorizing the countryside and destroying the villages. If he's as strong as we think it is it might contain more then one jewel shard." Sango announced from where she was playing with Kilala.
"Feh, then what are we waiting for let's get going!"
"Inuyasha, don't you think we should at least wait until tomorrow. I mean Sango and I just got back from retrieving a jewel shard and we should at least rest up so that we're stronger when we set out. The stronger we are when we set out the more jewel shards we'll be able to collect."
"And I think this would be the perfect time for me to collect some herbs with Kaede before we set out."
"Fine monk."
Kagome threw him a smile as she began cooking dinner.
"If it's all right with you Kagome-chan, I think I'm going to head to bed early I'm a little weary from fighting that demon."
"No problem Sango. You need all the rest you can get." Kagome passed the other inhabitants of the hut chopsticks and bowls filled with rice and sushi.
"Eat up everyone." Inuyasha and Shippou gobbled down their food and were arguing over the last bit of rice as Kagome and Miroku quietly conversed with each other.
"Get back here you little runt! That's mine!"
"Some things never change." Kagome sighed as Miroku offered her a small smile as he polished off his rice, yawned, and wished her goodnight.
"Kagomeeeeeeeee!" Shippou cried as Inuyasha pummeled him on the head.
"That's enough you two! It's time for you to go to bed Shippou."
"Yes Kagome," he dejectedly cried. The kitsune curled up on her sleeping bag as Kagome grabbed her bathing supplies.
"A warm bath in the hot springs will be the perfect way to start this week off."
"Feh." Inuyasha ran out the hut door and sprang from tree to tree trying to get the sight of Kagome bent in that compromising position out of his mind.
"Hmmm. Why can't he ever stay inside. Oh well." She sighed as she walked out the door silently and headed towards the hot springs. Kagome shed her clothes and slowly lowered her body into the hot spring.
"Ahhhhh." She sighed in comfort and ecstasy. She roughly scrubbed her body until she turned red and then leaned against a stone to stare at the moon.
'This should be the perfect way to start off the hunt for the shards again. This next few weeks are going to be rough and unforgiving on you Kagome, but at least you don't have to come up with anymore excuses for missing school...What a great way to spend summer vacation...stuck in the feudal era hunting down jewel shards with a hanyou that only thinks you good for finding jewel shards. And it's not like that adorable, and fluffy machoisitic slightly effeminate hanyou cares about you. Much less knows that your deeply and idiotically head over heels in love with him. 'Cause after all, your only a worthless...stupid...weak...ugly...reincarnation of his...perfect...beautiful...one...and...only...true...love Kikyou...that tried to kill that shit out of him. But nnnnnnnnnnno, that doesn't matter because she's the all-knowing Kikyou. ALL HAIL THE DEAD BITCH!' Each word was punctured with a violent scrub of her body. "Calm down Kagome...It's not like he's going to come in and start comparing her too you...Take a deep breath Kagome...That's it let it all go..." Slowly, she snuck into a state of euphoria as she moved to warmer area in the hot spring. The jets of water shooting under her providing warm massages against her back and shoulders.
"This is just like a hot tub. Only better."
Her bliss was short lived as Inuyasha, the object of her thoughts and contemplations, came crashing through the bushes.
"Bitch, hurry the hell up. You can't be out here all night. You're a sitting duck for any demon."
"Hmph sit! I brought my bow and arrow so I think if any demon comes by I think I can handle it."
"Fine, bitch, but don't count on me to protect you. 'Cause I won't, you're just my jewel shard detector. I could find the jewel on my own without you stupid humans slowing me down. If Kikyou were her we'd have already completed the jewel."
"..." The hanyou's ears twitched as he was met with silence. He turned around and timidly peeked at the young girl. Any other time he would have been sat to hell. His hidden glances at her revealed that she had been unfazed by his harsh comments, or so it appeared. Despite the rage and frustration building up inside her, Kagome sat their with her knees drawn near her chest and her shoulders hunched. Her gaze was focused to the side avoiding his and staring dully at the water in front of her.
"Kagome?" The hanyou questioned. She looked up and revealed at stony gaze, Inuyasha stepped back. He was eerily reminded of the look Kikyou had shot him before pinning him to Goshin-boku. His ears flattened and he began to sniff the air only to be confirmed that it was indeed Kagome in front of him.
"Inuyasha, I have told you before and this is the last time I tell. My name is Kagome, because I am Kagome. Meaning that while being the reincarnation of Kikyou I am nothing like her. I am sick and tired of you comparing me too her. I've had it with your stupid attitude. In case you haven't gotten it through that impossibly thick head of yours I will never be like her and I don't care about what your expectations are because I will never, do you hear me, never be able to fulfill them. I am not Kikyou and I never will be! So don't you dare compare me to her! Do you hear me Inuyasha!"
"Geez bitch lighten up."He stubbornly said, although inside he was confused and worried about the way Kagome had yelled at him. She'd never been so outright mean to him before and he sensed he'd struck a nerve this time. And he'd done it roughly too.
"Hmph. SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SITTTTTTTTTTTT!" She shrieked. She swam to the other edge of the hot spring, where he was reeling from the impact, still being slammed into the ground. Kagome grabbed her things, wrapped her body in a towel that was too short to be appropriate and hightailed it into the forest blindly shouting 'Sit' with every few steps she took to prevent Inuyasha from getting up and near her. By the time he'd been able to get up and shake of the headache and dizziness that clouded his vision she was long gone, and he didn't want to risk more bodily harm going after her. Kagome leaped over tree roots and kept running blindly having no thoughts in her head but to get away from the infuriating hanyou. She tripped and scraped her leg but the fall seemed to bring her back to life. She looked around puzzled and hid in one of the bushes to hurriedly finish pulling her clothes on and fixing the ones she tried to throw on while running. Needless to say she hadn't done it very well and her having run so far she was to exhausted to really want to turn her shirt right side out.
'Great, just what I needed. I'm running around in the middle of nowhere in the feudal era not knowing where I'm going and getting lost. On top of that the only person who knows I'm gone is Inuyasha and I doubt that he cares enough to come looking for me.'
She pulled on her shoes and lost the rest of her spirit. She was probably an hour away from the village with no idea how to get back without any light to guide her. She curled up against a tree and let her tears escape through her crossed arms. She wiped her face and only succeeded in smudging dirt on her tear-streaked cheeks.
'Is this all worth it? When did this go from being a promise to help get all the shards to something that rules my life. What's going to happen when this is all over? Do I really need to keep doing this? Does Inuyasha really need me? I mean come on like he said "if Kikyou were here he'd have already found all the shards." Is this really worth it. What about my future.' Kagome got up and began walking in what she thought was the right direction.
'I can't see anything. This is getting me nowhere. What if I use my spirit energy the way I do in battles to light up the path and that way I can get back faster. Brilliant idea Kagome! I just hope this doesn't make me too weak.' Her hand flared to life emitting a bright blueish light. Kagome stumbled across the path her face becoming paler as she expanded more and more energy. Her light dimmed and she began to stumble and trip more often. She'd been uselessly going around in circles. She shivered as her body became more susceptible to the cold. Inuyasha came crashing through the trees to catch her in time as she fell over. He'd come looking for her after his guilt at letting her fun off had eaten at him for too long. He came in time to see her losing all her strength and stopping for a rest.
He was saddened by what he overheard earlier eavesdropping on her.
"What's going to happen after we're done collecting all the jewel shards. Maybe, I shouldn't be here. I can just go home and... and I'll stay there. Grandpa can seal the well and that's it. I'll move on right? Inuyasha won't care and everyone else will get over it eventually. Right! Right! I can do that and he'll get Kikyou to help him and he'll be happy and..."Kagome trailed off and went back to thinking in her mind, her eyes frightened, unsure of herself in the dark of the night. She stood up, set her shoulders back, slapped herself.
"Come on Kagome, you made a promise. And you're gonna keep that promise. Stop being such a sniveling weak little girl. Now it's high time you get back to the village. Stop talking nonsense!" She walked blindly trying to find her way back. Inuyasha stepped forward and was hurt when he saw her only throw him an angry glance. He grabbed her and she shouted at him. "I'm fine go away! Go help Kikyou! She probably needs you more than I do!"He wouldn't loosen his grip.
"Just shut up you dumb wench and let me grab your legs!'
"Let me go you asshole! Go away you stupid pervert I can do this on my own!" She mumbled stumbling on her weak knees as he tried to coax her onto his back. Finally, when his frustration and anger had grown enough he roughly grabbed, threw her on his back and started running.
'This is all my fault. Not like she wants a dirty hanyou near her.'His ears flattened and listened to her breath even out as she fell into an exhausted sleep. She mumbled incoherent things but of the few words he was able to catch were, his name, Kikyou, lots of threats to S-I-T him and that she'd be dealing with him in the morning. He arrived at the hut and slowly carried her bridal style into her sleeping bag. He sat down next to her bag and observed her in silence his ears twitching every few minutes or so. She woke up and jumped when she saw him there
"Inuyasha...I'm sorry I was out of line today. You didn't do anything wrong, and I shouldn't have blown up at you. I was mad at myself, for not being enough like Kikyou to make you happy. You're right at times I can be a burden and you don't deserve that. Can you ever forgive me?" She tried looking into his eyes, but he avoided her gaze covering his eyes with his bangs. She cast her eyes downward and Inuyasha peeked at her. Kagome was staring at her fisted hand, as if amazed by the way the floor felt beneath it.
"Inuyasha?"Kagome glanced up. He quickly looked away.
"Feh." He shrugged her words off but she knew that was his way of saying yes. Inuyasha got up walked to the door of the hut, but hesitated as he reached the exit of the hut. He stopped and turned around gruffly telling her "Feh. Get some sleep bitch, we have a long day ahead of us tomorrow and I won't be letting you slow us down."Kagome nodded at him, slightly confused at how quickly he'd pushed their argument away. Inuyasha flashed her a small smile that she would have missed if she wasn't so busy staring at his facial features.
He then leaped out he hut and ran away into the dark night lit only by stars as he made his way to Goshin-boku. He leaped onto an even higher branch then normal and sat back to stare at the moon. Sitting higher in the tree and being closer slightly calmed his frazzled nerves giving him a sense of serenity and loneliness. His thoughts drifted to their earlier argument and he whimpered slightly.
'Kagome, I'm so sorry. I went to far, you didn't do anything wrong. Now you hate me
for being a filthy hanyou, and hurting you the way I did. This is all my fault I let you
down, the same way I let Kikyou down. How do I show you Kagome? You just don't
understand! I'm so frustrated!'
Her words drifted in his mind as he leaned against the trunk crossing his arms. "... will never be like her and I don't care about what your expectations are because I will never, do you hear me, never be able to fulfill them..." 'Does that mean that you don't care about me, Kagome? Do you hate the way Kikyou does? This is all my fault. I let you down Kagome, and I won't do it again. Maybe it's too late. Argh! How do I show yo? How do I make you understand Kagome? I let you down, and now you hate me? You're just like Kikyou...you too are the same. You'll never love a filthy hanyou like me because like you said you made a promise and you won't break it. I'm just a responsibility...You're just like Kikyou...I'll never get through to you.'
The hanyou drifted into a weary restless sleep images of Kagome and Kikyou playing over in his mind. Their expressions of hate and loathing frightening him.
If a stranger were to examine our peaceful village. They would notice all is not as it seems, the contrary emotions from these two souls calling out to him in their hurt, insecurity and confusion. And, yet he wouldn't even be able to scratch the surface at web of tangled emotions ruining the silence of the night.
Authors Notes: They're both OOC and it might seem that at first Kagome blowing at him so early is like premature ejaculation, but I guarantee it's not. This will slowly segway into a lot of deep and moving even maybe inspiring character development. Or maybe I'm just a screwup that shouldn't be writing fanfiction. ;-3 tell me what you guys think! Criticism is greatly appreciated, but don't be too mean.
OMG! My first reviewer! Thanks. Wrote this one for you! Didn't know reviewers could make me feel so inspired!
memo: So, do you guys think I should do some of Inuyasha's POV from when he wasn't looking for Kagome?