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"Why must everything happen to me! WHY!" yelled Jhonen. He was handcuffed to none other than Dib.

"Because if it didn't happen to you, it would….I don't know." said Dib.

"That was a sad attempt at humor." said Jhonen.

"Want some Jalapenos?" asked Gir stuffing the peppers down Jhonen's throat.

"Where did you get those?" asked Dib.

"Mmhm…muh..muh…MUCK!" yelled Jhonen trying to swallow the peppers.

"I keep them in my head." said Gir.

"Why?" asked Dib, Gir just shrugged his shoulders.

"Hey, Dib." said Jhonen.

"What?" Jhonen pulled on the handcuffs causing Dib to trip.

"What does the floor taste like?" asked Jhonen.

"Oh wait! I know!" yelled Gir who bent down to lick the floor.

"I'm surrounded by idiots."

"No you're not, you're handcuffed to one!" said Dib getting up.

"Sad attempt Dib. Sad attempt."

"Where are you Dib?" said a familiar voice.

"NO! It's Johnny!" yelled Dib hiding behind Jhonen.

"And this just keeps getting weirder and weirder."

"Aha! I have you now!" yelled Nny finding Dib, Jhonen, and Gir. "Now Dib you have two choices. This knife! Or this Knife!"

"Can I have another choice?" asked Dib.

"No, you have to choose."

"But I don't want to."

"Fine, then I'll use both."

"NO!" yelled Dib.

"Now Dib, you have to chose what Johnny is going to destroy you with." said Jhonen.

"How do you know my name!" yelled Johnny.

"I'm not going through all that again." said Mr. Vasquez. "Let's just say I'm the ruler of everything and anything you see."

"Eh- Works for me." said Johnny. "Now to destroy Dib!" Dib panicked and then ran dragging Jhonen Vasquez behind him. Dib and Jhonen then hid behind a huge vat of bacon grease.

"Why did you drag over here? I was starting to like Johnny." said Jhonen.

"I need to get away, quickly. He was going to destroy me!"

"And I was going to watch you being destroyed by Johnny! See I even made popcorn!"

"But he couldn't have killed me anyways! This is K+ fic. They can't have any gory details, or kill me! SO ha!" yelled Dib.

"Hey the author could have just changed the rating, and if he couldn't kill you why did you run away?"

"For a reason I shall never reveal to the world!"

"Why are we talking about this?" asked Jhonen.

"Because…we have nothing better to do, but babble about things that don't make sense."

"That made sense." said Jhonen. "Hey where's Gir?"

"We left him with Johnny." said Dib, shuddering as he said the name 'Johnny'.

To Johnny and Gir we go:

"Damn it! He escaped again." said Johnny. He looked toward Gir, he was eating bacon.

"Hey." said Johnny getting Gir's attention. "Can I have some bacon?"

"Nope! My bacon!"

"You dare not complete the whishes of an angry homicidal maniac!" yelled Johnny. Gir started laughing hysterically. "What's so funny?"

"You know big words." said Gir smiling.

"Give me the bacon!" yelled Johnny.

"No." said Gir. Then he started giggling.

"Don't make me jam this knife into that tiny little head of yours, which is empty." said Johnny. Gir continued giggling. "You didn't understand a word I said, didn't you?"

"Nope."

"Give me what I desire! Give it to me!"

"JALAPENOS!" yelled Gir stuffing peppers down Johnny's throat.

"Mhm..muh..muh!" yelled Nny choking on the peppers. (Translation: I like boom stuff.)

"Aw. Don't choke Nny. Here got you some chocolate bubblegum!"

"I don't want any chocolate bubblegum!" yelled Nny, finally swallowing the peppers.

"Want this hammer?" asked Gir, pulling a hammer out of his head.

"Hey, I could use that to hit Dib. All right give it to me!" yelled Nny. Gir then hit Nny on the head with the hammer, hard. Nny fainted and fell to the ground.

"Aw. I guess he didn't want Mr. Hammer after all." said Gir. Dib and Jhonen ran to the unconscious Johnny.

"Is he dead?" asked Dib.

"He's just unconscious." said Jhonen. After much poking and staring at the fainted Johnny, Nny started to regain consciousness.

"Hey what happened?" said Johnny getting up.

"Get away! He wants to kill me!" yelled Dib hiding behind Jhonen.

"One minute, when you're not looking, I'm going to chop your arm off, so I can be free." said Jhonen looking toward the metal that kept him and Dib attached to one another.

"Chop his arm off?" started Nny. "That would be awful!" Everyone's jaw dropped except Gir's. He had no clue what was going on.

"Please tell me you said 'That would be awesome'." said Jhonen.

"What a cute doggie!" yelled Nny picking up Gir and hugging him.

"That hammer to the head must have done drain damage. Neat." said Dib.

"All of you are so kind. Why don't you come with me to my room in the white house? I need to cover all the nasty black color off the wall and paint it a happier brighter color. I'm thinking a pink. What do you think?" asked Nny.

"I think I'm going to be sick." said Jhonen. "Johnny! Remember who you are! You are a Homicidal Maniac! Come on! You are too cool to be downgraded to this!Now kill something! Anything!Preferably Dib." Jhonen said. He looked around and didn't see Johnny. "Hey, where did he go?"

"Hey! What do you think of this?" said Johnny coming back with a different look. He had dyed his hair blond and made it into an afro. He wore a bright red shirt bearing the words: Let's all be happy! Happy! His black pants had been replaced by jeans. Odd colored jeans. Yellow and orange striped jeans. He had also gotten a membership to the 'Smile insanely and help everyone club'.

"Oh my gosh!" yelled Jhonen.

"He looks like something out of the Cat and the Hat!" yelled Dib.

"Ah. Don't be jelous my friend. For you too can look like this in the end." said Johnny.

"AHH! That rhymed! Johnny stop rhyming!" yelled Jhonen, shocked.

"I can't help it. It's who I am. Do you want some ham?" Nny said.

"AHH! There's only one thing to do!" yelled Jhonen grabbing the hammer out of Gir's head.

"Aw. Jhonen you look sad. Did you do something bad?"

"Not me! You! Stop acting all goody-goody!" yelled Jhonen raising the hammer.

"No, Jhonen. Give me that!" said Johnny, taking the hammer away from Jhonen. "Now looks like someone needs to learn how to behave. I'll give you the hammer when you learn to use your indoor voice." Nny said.

"Hey! Nobody tells me to behave! I am your creator! Now listen to your master and pound yourself with that hammer!" yelled Jhonen. Suddenly you could hear a chorus of kittens coming from Johnny's pocket.

"Ah. The kittens! Do you know what that means?" asked Johnny.

"It's time to clean out your pockets?" asked Dib.

"It's time to hit yourself with the hammer, so you can back to being back to your normal self, then kill Dib for your enjoyment as I watch eating my popcorn, which is getting colder as we speak?" asked Jhonen. "Please say that's the time!"

"Uh-no. As a member of the smile insanely and Help Others Club, I need to make more people smile! So we are taking a field trip to the White house! Isn't that great!" yelled Nny. "Doesn't it make you feel all happy and warm inside?"

"No…" said Dib and Johnny in unison.

"Well, of course you're not happy. We need to sing the happy song! "yelled Nny. "Come on sing! I Love you, you love me!"

"Let's get together and kill this fake Johnny." sang Dib.

"Good job Dib! You get a lollipop!" yelled Nny giving Dib a cherry lollipop.

"We have to turn Johnny back to normal." said Jhonen.

"Why? I kinda like this new Johnny." said Dib.

"No more talking! It's time for our field trip!" yelled Nny as he loaded everyone into a huge bus that came out of nowhere.

"Every time he speaks, it makes me want to throw up." said Jhonen.

"If he takes us to the white house we can make Gir reassign his position. Thus saving earth." said Dib.

"I'm starting to not like Earth." said Jhonen.

"Come on! We need to save the Earth!" yelled Dib.

"Fine, but if he starts singing-"

"The wheels on the car go round and round." sang Johnny.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" yelled Jhonen.

Another chapter ending with Jhonen screaming. OOC Johnny is scary. He gave me nightmares. Please review and No flames.