I entered the Gryffindor common room. Ahh, home at last. The room as usual was warm with bright red and gold colors. It was my true home. The room welcomed me with all its decorations and sorts.

"Hey lily! Wait up will you." yelled out Sybil.

I stopped in my tracks and waited what seem like forever. Finally my three friends came and we walked together upstairs to our dormitory.

"Lily why are you ever so quiet? You're usually so lively when we get back to Hogwarts." Danica asked.

"Well I don't know, I guess I'm just tired." I hopelessly answered.

"Ok, go get some sleep and we'll have a better day tomorrow ok?"

I nodded and left for bed. My friend is so motherly, yet so ditzy and blonde. Even though she had natural black hair. I laugh at my thought. Lily, you are so weird that voice said again.

Next morning came and it was a fine morning. I got up and got dressed. Aw man, I have classes today I thought as I looked out the window. I saw a familiar figure flying around on a broomstick. Ok…I thought. It's either really early in the morning, or he's ditching class. Sucks for him. I gave a little smile until something interrupted me.

"Who're you smiling about? I want to see." Danica asked.

"It's a great morning, duh." I said hoping she doesn't realize.

"Huh. You smiling at the sun? Yeah…. Are you feeling ok Lily?"

"Sure I am." I replied as I look back outside. Nothing was there. He's gone I thought. I'll see him later.

"Let's go get some breakfast yeah?"

"Yeah ok."

I thought to myself that I have to pretend to be in a good mood. I don't want my friends to worry about my sadness. Even though nothing is causing it.

I put on a great big fake smile as we walked towards the great hall. I sat between Sybil and Danica, and across from the Marauders.

"Good morning everyone." I greeted.

"Good morning." Everyone said in unison.

"Lovely day hmm?" I asked when I started to put jam on my toast. But then something happened that I wished I

didn't put jam on my toast.

I look up to see James and Sirius muttering under their breath.

Great…they're going to do something to me, to humiliate me. Again.

I blinked then the next thing I know, I felt a thud and sticky jam against my face. My toast that I was going to eat was on my face.

I sat there still with a smile…along with toast stuck against my face. With my smile I said menacingly "Thanks guys." I know that the only reason they're doing that is because they want to see the perfect girl blow up. The happiest, preppiest girl to blow up. No i'm not gonna give them the satisfaction. Then I felt a pull and the toast was off, and hands furiously trying to get the jam off.

"James! Sirius! Why on earth would you do that?" yelled Danica.

"You know fun…I mean we love our Lily Evans." Sirius said.

I look at the pair of them as they're laughing. I still smile at them with so much dislike. I guess the look on my face scared them to stop.

"Hahhaha…whoa."

I got up and went for the bathroom to wash the sticky jam off my face.

As I went in the bathroom, I checked to see if I'm alone. It was empty.

"AHHHH. I can't stand them! I hate them I hate them!"

No you can't crack now Lily. You're a happy person. Everyone loves you. Don't let others think that you're an angry person. What if I am? I asked my self. My smiles are secretly hurting me and I can't stand it. "I'm not PERFECT!" I yelled. My voice echoed through the bathroom. I stood against the wall and slid down. I'm not a depressed girl. I'm just not in a good mood. I mean I just had a piece of toast stuck to my face. I'll feel better later. Haha…no you wont. A menacing voice said in my head. You're nothing. You think everyone loves you but they really hate you. They think you're perfect. They want to be you. Why cant you become you're real self so everyone can see that you're a real human being. I don't know…I answered that voice. I can't let these feelings bottle up inside me. I need someone. To hold me. And I don't want my friends to do that. They got their own problems.

I walk back to the great hall and see that everyone was scurrying around. Oh great class is starting. I quickly walk to my first class, Charms. Not knowing that I would have to be partnered up with…James.

"Hey Lily! Did you get that jam off your face? It was Sirius's idea…not mine. I swear." James asked.

I slowly turn around in my seat to face him.

"Oh yeah, that jam, I bet it's good for my face cause you know the fruit is good for the skin. Thanks." I smiled sweetly. What an idiot.

"Why do I have to be partnered with you James? You're just gonna joke around!" I asked.

"I don't know. Maybe we're meant to be together." James smirked.

"Ha. Ha. Ha. That's so funny I forgot to laugh." I said. It weird how cute he said that. I do wish we were together, really. But I don't think he has the same feelings for me. He just loves tormenting me. Just play along Lily.

As the lesson dragged on, I turn around to look at James, just to see that he's fast asleep. Oh my gosh. He's sleeping. Doesn't he know that this affects my grade? But look how cute he looks. Quit it Lily, before other people see you gawking at him.

Quickly at it seems, Charms was over and lunch came. Somehow, again we ended up sitting next to Marauders.

"Can't you guys ever pick seats that aren't near them?" I asked my friends.

"No, it seems that they follow us." Replied Sybil. I shuddered. I cant stand them. Argghh. As we all sat down we all actually talked. I mean James and Sirius were actually talking to us without acting like jerks. They're nice guys but come on, they're Sirius and James. The school's playboys. Always seen with different girls almost everyday. Its hard not to see them kissing a different girl 24/7. Gross. I looked at Remus and noticed he's reading. How funny, its so weird how he's so different from Sirius and James, yet they're best friends. Then peter, now that's just weird.

"…and then the broomstick broke right into two! In MIDAIR!" Sirius said as I snapped out of my trance. I didn't know I looked bored until someone said my name.

"Hey Lily." James said.

"What?" I said ignorantly.

"So…it seems that you don't want to join in with the convo."

"Nope. Talking about breaking broomsticks don't interest me."

"Then what DO interest you, Evans? Let's talk."

"What if I don't want to talk to you? You're probably just gotta mock me like you usually do."

"I promise I wont. Want do you want to talk about?"

I wondered for awhile. Then I quickly remembered that girl I saw on the train before we arrived at Hogwarts. But then before I could ask, the bell rang. Classes are to start again. Blasted bell. I shall curse it…

It seemed like forever before dinner started. I didn't feel like sitting there and listening to nonsense. So I told my friends that I was just gonna grab some food and eat in the common room.

"Aw come on Lily…eat with us!" begged Danica.

"Naw. I don't feel like it. I'll be upstairs don't worry."

I carried my food and walked, not to the common room, but a room near the owlery. I walked through the door and the room became an outside patio. Awesome I thought. I could sit here and look at the stars. Just by myself. My thoughts and me. But before I could eat I see a tall dark shadow by the door way.

"What the bloody hell do you want Potter?" I asked.

"Well I noticed that you weren't eating in the hall and I went to look for you."

"You've found me now you can leave. Thanks very much."

"It's a long walk back…is it ok if I sit here with you?"

Ok…freeze. James Potter, the one person that mocks me and jokes around like there's no tomorrow is asking me to sit with me. This is too much to take in! take a deep breath Lily.

"Um, sure I guess." I smile. Don't give in to him Lily. this could be a set-up.

"So, why are you out here?" he asked.

"I don't know…just to think for a bit that's all." I answered not looking at him.

"You know, you've been quiet so far. Is anything wrong?"

"You're asking ME whats wrong? Whats wrong with you James? I've never seen you so…helpful."

"Ouch, that hurt" James said as he put a hand on his heart.

"Ha.Ha. I don't know why ive been quiet." I lied. Then quickly there were flashes of my broken up family. My sisters and brothers fighting. My parents not there giving a care in the world. I looked down at my food. Maybe I shouldn't eat it, in case he is going to do something to it.

"Well you know, I've gotta tell someone this before it eats me alive inside." James said after a small silence.

"What are you talking about? Tell me what?" I asked.

"Well Lily, I don't know how to say this…but I guess you're the only other person I could trust…"

"Does Sirius know?" I asked.

"Uh…yeah of course."

He's up to something. I know it.

"This is serious Lily, I think im…"

"You're what?"

"I think im…queer." He said with his head down.

"WHAT! What? What? Huh?" I said bewildered.

My face was in a surprise way. My mouth was open so big that I could feel the stone floor. James Potter is WHAT?