Disclaimer : see chapter 1
Author's Note: Finally, I'm back !!! These passed months have been really hectic (exams – I passed, by the way -, internship in France – with some really nice weather-, and then parents who expect that now you are on holiday, you can do a lot of little, boring jobs – a situation you may recognize )
But here I am!
This chapter has been a real pain in the ass, and I must confess I'm still not totally convinced it works … So let me know what you think, you have no idea how much your reviews mean to me !
Chapter 4
9 ABY
Without the slightest movement, hidden in the shadow, Han Solo calmly observed the scene before him. A dozen, blindfolded, future Jedi Knights were trying to avoid the electric charges, fired by several training remotes, with their lightsabers. Some of them succeeded well, en Han had to admit that it all looked pretty impressive.
Once, a long time ago, he had witnessed this practice before: the late Obi-Wan Kenobi had given a young Luke his first experience with the Force. At that time, Han hadn't given much credit to all this mambo jambo about this so-called Force who would reside in all living things.
But now, so many years later and after all he had been through with Luke and Leia, even he, the most cynical and sceptical person in the whole Galaxy, had to admit that there was 'something'. Maybe this old-fashioned belief of ancient times might not be all quackery.
He regarded deeply all those who came to study Her ways in this newly-build Jedi Temple. Sometimes, he caught himself wishing he could receive a similar training. Live for a Jedi looked so much easier – they could always rely on the Force if things got a little tough. But immediately, he realised that this was a wrong attitude to begin with. And he didn't have the slightest talent for it anyway …
After all, he was quite happy the way he lived his life. He had close friends, a great position in the New Republic which allowed him to roam the Galaxy every now and again with Chewbacca and most importantly, he had a wonderful wife. From the moment he set eyes on her, almost ten years ago, he was mesmerized. She wasn't just an astounding beauty, but on top of that she was one of the must courageous and strongest personalities he ever met. Han was absolutely convinced that without her intervention, the Emperor would still hold sway. She was everything he could dream of.
And still … it was because of her that Han had come to the Jedi Temple. They've been together for many happy years, but he felt something was wrong. She was hiding something from him, and he didn't know what worried him more: that she kept something secret for him or the fact that she kept a secret for him. Didn't she trust him anymore ? Perhaps Luke knew more about it, through their connection with the Force …
Despite everything, Han had to smile when he thought back to the their silly rivalry. Luke too was smitten by the beautiful princess (of course before he knew she was his sister) and Han still couldn't believe his luck – his biggest competitor was her brother!! But of course he always knew that from Leia's part it never was a difficult choice. Even if Luke wasn't her brother, she would have chosen Han anyway.
"Han?"
Startled, he looked up. Luke watched him with a worried expression on his face. Han noticed they were the only two left. In all his reflections, he hadn't realised that all the Padawans had gone.
"To what do I owe your visit?" asked Luke when Han kept silent. " You don't come here very often." And then he continued more lightly, "And I've rarely seen you this deep in thought."
"That's true," said Han laughing," it must be this place, all the wisdom surrounding it. It provokes reflection, even for someone like me!"
Luke laughed, relieved that despite whatever was haunting Han, his friend hadn't lost his sense of humour. Nevertheless, he became serious again, sensing that the once so carefree and superficial smuggler clearly had something on his mind.
"Can I help ? I doubt you just passed by…"
Han nodded and only after some time, he said: "There's something I'd like to discuss with you. It feels strange to ask help like I'm some little kid. You know how I like to solve everything myself but I think I could use your advise on this, because it has to do with …"
"Leia," Luke filled in softly.
Han looked at him surprised.
"How … ? Did she tell you …"? He felt a stab of jealousy
"No no," Luke assured him, "she didn't tell me anything. I felt it."
Han smiled weakly. "She will be so disappointed. You know her. She's really doing everything to hide it and still we both saw through it. Now you, I can understand, with the Force and everything," Luke grinned, noticing the irony in his friends words," but that even me, the most blindfolded man alive, at least where emotions are concerned, picked up on it, that must be quite a shocker."
He fell silent for a while and then proceeded. All traces of irony had left his tone. "I see it in small things. When I tell her something, her mind is clearly elsewhere. Or when I ask her something, I have to repeat the question several times before she answers. And then at night, she tosses and turns in her sleep, if she sleeps at all. Lately she just lies wide awake. Something is bothering her and I haven't the slightest idea what it could be."
Suddenly he looked at Luke with mistrust. "But you do …"
It was a conclusion, but Luke heard an undertone of frustration.
"I have a suspicion," he said calmly. "Nothing more."
"Well, what ?" Han asked impatiently.
"Maybe you should just ask her. She might answer, you know…"
Han didn't find it amusing.
"Oh, I see," he said angrily, "it's something between brother and sister again, and me, her husband for your information, is kept in the dark. Well, I've had it! I love her, damn it, and I have a right to know."
Luke, who was familiar with his friends temper, had expected such an outburst and calmly placed a hand on his Hans shoulder.
"Han, I only said I had a suspicion. I can tell you what I think that's bothering her, but you'll never know for certain until you ask her. Talk to her. She's the only one who can tell you what's going on. And she will tell you, when she's ready. You know that."
Han nodded. Luke radiated such tranquillity that it calmed him down.
"You're right. I'm sorry."
But suddenly his eyes twinkled.
"This doesn't mean you can't tell me what you THINK is bothering her …"
Luke sighed and shook his head smiling. "You are right. But promise me you will go talk to her. There's a chance I might be mistaken." Han gave a short nod an Luke continued, "Well, think logically. If you were her, what would occupy you so much that you would forget everything else?"
Han shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know, there are so many things …"
"I'll express myself more clearly. If you were in OUR position, what's the one thing you really would want to know ?"
"In your and Leia's position?" Han thought for a moment. "Maybe how come Vader never knew anything about your existence, or maybe … what woman could love this monster so much to bare him two children … Oh sorry, I didn't want to …"
Luke brushed the apology aside. "Exactly. I would phrase it a little differently … But I saw him, Han, Vader, mine and Leia's father, just before he died. For a second, I saw Anakin Skywalker, the real Anakin Skywalker, who could love an was loved by a woman, my mother. And you have now idea how much I would loved to get to know that man …"
His voice died away. He cleared his throat.
"I constantly try to imagine his life before Darth Vader. How he met my mother, what gave him such a strong hate to choose the Dark Side. He has made mistakes, with terrible consequences, but something drove him to them … Was it my mother. I don't know anything about her. There are so many questions …."
The men didn't see how they were being watched by two figures, surrounded with a soft, unnatural glow. The first, a tall, bearded man, looked up at the second, even taller person, and said softly:
"Anakin, it is time …"
Roeltje: dank je wel dat je het gelezen hebt, en een review geplaatst hebt, das altijd tof !
Cinnamon: hey, I'm sorry for the delay … damn writers block. But your review helped to get rid of it, so thank you. I passed my exams without much difficulties and now I still have to do one year … finally !
Sue: thank you for your kind review, I hope you liked this chapter too !
Albus: thank you for your kind words, I promise I'll post the next chapter faster than this one !
KiTsTer-and-Annie: Thank you !!!
Kitster : Thanks !
Leeuwke: merci, hopelijk vind je dit hoofdstuk ook wat deftig, het heft echt bloed, zweet en tranen gekost …
JarJar: thank you! I promise I'll post the next chapter sooner than this one ;-), I just need to translate it and it's finished …
Harlequin: thank you, I hope you liked this chapter also … it was a difficult part for me to write…
Sheree: thank you for your kind review, I'll do my best to post the next chapter sooner.
Amidala: I hope everything is all right there in far-away China … Thank you for your reviews, they mean a lot to me !! Hope hearing from you soon !
Princess-Kinky: thank you for your kind review !! I must confess I'm not that familiar with the book-series … It just my vision on how things should evolve after the events in ROTJ. Glad you like it !
Elda Aranel: thank you ! I also adore the Arthurian Legends and here is a writer you might like : Jack Whyte, he creates a very realistic base for the myths !! It's one of my favourite "Arthurian" writers … (and you're name sounds a bit Elvish … influence of LOTR ?)
Ann: merci, ge weet dat uw reviews veel voor mij betekenen hé. Ik ben eens benieuwd wat je van dees hoofdstuk vindt….
Spike_Sgal: Thank you for your very interesting review. Perhaps you know now, from this chapter, that Leia isn't about to tell anything to Luke (yet) – I have made the situation a little more complicated (I like complicated stuff ;-) ) by introducing Darth Vader himself … but I can't tell anything more or I will spoil everything….
HermOIne Granger: thank you !!! I hope the force stays with me just a little longer ;-) !