Chapter 5
From Death Into New Life
Hearing the telephone ring for what seemed to be the 20th time that morning, Lorelai promptly shoved her head under her pillow in an attempt to block out the incessant ringing of the device she used to glue religiously to her ear. When the machine finally picked up, Lorelai managed to grumble a distinct, "Thank God," before shrugging the pillow off with her arm and sitting up.
Wiping the back of her sleeve quickly over her face, she glanced out her window and saw that she could at least tell that it was daytime; what hour and what day, however, was an entirely different story. With a groan, she leaned back into the heavy indentation that had held her body for the past six… no, seven days since the funeral.
Soon a knock started on the door downstairs, and with a moan Lorelai protested, "What is this? National… 'Bother Lorelai' Day?" Making no move to answer the knocking, it continued for the next two minutes before the visitor finally gave up. "At last!" Lorelai said to herself with a sweeping embellish of her arms, "The person gets some sense!"
Pulling the covers over her head, Lorelai fought to return to the blissful darkness of sleep when she heard a bang at her bedroom door and something brushing across her feet. With a scream, she sat upright and tried to climb toward the light from under the covers. She found no success until a male hand burrowed a hole and pushed it toward her searching head and hands.
"Luke," Lorelai gasped, clasping her hands across her hammering heart, "You scared the crap out of me!" Brushing the hair out of her face, she ended with a heartfelt, "Geez," before slapping him across the shoulder.
"Lorelai," Luke began," you need to get up. It's been a week. You can't punish yourself like this. God, have you even eaten any of the food I've brought you?" Luke asked, noticing the lack of food scattered around her room and focusing instead on the glass of water and container of Tylenol PMs on her bedside stand.
Luke's brow furrowed, and with conviction he said, "Enough is enough."
"Leave me alone," Lorelai whined. "I'm not in the mood."
"Neither am I," Luke retorted, rising from the foot of her bed.
Lorelai grabbed the covers and pulled them back over her head, but before she was even settled, Luke grabbed her feet from the bottom of the bed, pulling her across the mattress and toward him. With a shriek, Lorelai let go of the covers as she began the descent down the bed into Luke's arms. He picked her up and threw her over his shoulder before turning around and heading down the stairs.
"Luke! Put me down!" Lorelai protested, pounding her fists against his back and kicking.
"You'd better stop that, or I just might drop you," Luke half-warned, even though he and Lorelai both knew that he would never allow her to get injured in any way. Nevertheless, Lorelai's antics soon ceased, and Luke traveled quickly into the entryway before setting her down.
As she slowly stood for the first time in days, Lorelai was forced to make a frantic grab for the pajama pants that were making their quick descent down her legs. Her cheeks flushed as she tried to tie the string around her waist even tighter before noticing that she'd lost quite a bit of weight.
Luke noticed too.
Clearing his throat, Luke took command of the situation and announced, "While I go make some breakfast, you check the answering machine. There are quite a few people worried bout you."
"Yah yah," Lorelai complained, before getting a gentle shove toward the machine as Luke moved into the kitchen. Lorelai rolled her eyes and punched the button.
She listened to the pre-recorded voice drone about how long it had been since she'd last checked her messages. Lorelai sat on the couch just as she heard, "You have 47 new messages, the first sent…" Lorelai's biggest groan of the day had been waiting for this, and it came out just as she buried her face in the couch.
"I heard that!" Luke shouted from the kitchen.
"Uggg…" Lorelai exaggerated loudly toward the kitchen.
She didn't miss the laughter that met her reply.
- - - - - - - - - -
That kick in the pants from Luke was all Lorelai needed before she had immersed herself in a whirlwind of activities to keep her body busy, and her mind off of Rory.
Much to Sookie's surprise, she received a phone call from Lorelai a scant eight days after the funeral, begging her to consider a plan of going into business for themselves and finally opening an inn.
And that was all she needed…
Lorelai was busy from 6am to 9pm every day making phone calls to contractors, interior designers, appliance companies, and looking over every other little detail that was needed to complete her dream. All this time, she and Sookie even had their own cheerleader. Luke was beyond happy to see Lorelai in his diner the day after he'd paid her a little visit, dressed in a work suit and ready to go.
Over the eight months it had taken to reconstruct portions of The Dragonfly, Lorelai had taken notice of Luke's interest in her project, and was thrilled that he was getting behind the inn full force. She didn't realize that Luke was doing it because he was behind her…
And so, like all good projects, this one came to a close nearly a year after Rory's death, and on the dawn of Lorelai's 34th birthday. Not one for celebrations, she and Sookie had a simple toast of champagne inside the foyer, sharing the mutual joy of the inn's completion and Lorelai's life.
As she walked home that night, Lorelai was bombarded by the greetings of well-wishers who never forgot the day that usually signified a party for the whole town… At least when Rory was alive it did. Lorelai met their shouts with a smile, but inside she was dying to get home and inside a bath so that she could forget that Rory wasn't there to help her celebrate.
As she walked past the diner, she noticed Luke starting to tear down for the evening. Flipping the chairs upside down and placing them on the tables, Luke's routine had purpose and direction. The squirt of the cleaner, the wiping with the cloth, and then the flipping of the chairs had an order that Lorelai was drawn to in her tired frame of mind, so she found herself pushing in the door of the diner and hearing the bell tinkle as she crossed under the doorway.
Not expecting any customers at this time of night, Luke looked up in surprise at the figure that had just walked in. Seeing that it was Lorelai, he cleared his throat and assumed an awkward stance with his hands in his pockets.
"Is everything okay?" he asked, worried.
With a wave of her hand, Lorelai replied, "Everything's fine," before taking a seat at the counter.
"Can I get you anything?" Luke prodded in an attempt to break the silence.
"Sure… Ice cream?"
"You bet."
Luke moved to the back room to take care of her request, and Lorelai was left alone with her own thoughts. Looking around the diner, she took notice of the small things she'd never thought about before. She noticed the coffee mugs that lined the back wall. She took notice of the specific color scheme. She noticed that her mind was going crazy with the inn, so she focused instead on her hands.
It didn't take too long for a habitually impatient Lorelai to wonder what was taking Luke so long to get her ice cream ready.
"Luke?" she called out toward the back room.
"Coming," was the only reply she got, so she resumed the study of her hands.
Clearing his throat was the announcement Luke gave as he walked back into the main room of the diner. Lorelai looked up as her face gave way into shock and then smile as she saw the enormous bowl of ice cream with 'Happy Birthday' written on it in fudge, marshmallow, sprinkles, and ever other form of junk food that completed ice cream.
She sat up straighter as Luke put the bowl down in front of her and placed a candle in the slowly melting mess. Lighting it, he said, "Okay, now… Oh wait, hold on a second." Luke rushed out from behind the counter in a half-run before flipping the light switch and immersing the diner in darkness, save the one candle that burned brightly.
Making his way back to Lorelai, he said, "Okay, I'm going to do something that I am never going to do again… So listen up the first time and no mocking whatsoever."
Perplexed, Lorelai folded her arms across her chest and waited for what Luke had to say.
And so he began with a low tone, "Happy birthday to you… Happy birthday to you…"
Lorelai's smile broadened and she clutched her hands across her mouth in attempt to contain the laughter that was threatening to spill forth. Luke gave her a glare when he sang, "Happy birthday to Lorelai…" And then the first snort of laughter came out, so he finished with a quick, "Happybirthdaytoyou."
The laughter that washed over him was immediate and heartfelt. Lorelai laughed and laughed, as looked stood there blushing furiously like a child. Seeing her laugh again was enough, so he began to smile at her beet red face and the tears rolling down her cheeks.
Lorelai was laughing so long, that Luke wondered if she was going to be able to catch her breath afterwards, so he warned her, "Okay… I get it, it was funny, now make a wish," but the laughter continued. Luke reached across the counter and touched the hand that covered her face and realized that she was shaking.
Her laughter was turning into sobs, and the tears of humor she'd felt moments earlier were turning into tears of pain.
"Lorelai, are you alright?" Luke asked tentatively.
She shakily removed her hands from her face and cast her glossy eyes on Luke and said with wonder, "That's the first time I've laughed since Rory died…"
Luke shook his head with a smile on his face, "It's okay to laugh," wiping her tears with the back of his shirt sleeve. "You were born to laugh…"
Lorelai nodded, wiping a few more errant tears from her face before announcing, "Enough with this blubbering, I'm ready to make my wish!"
Luke stood there and said, "Are you seriously alright?"
Lorelai cast her eyes up toward his and they locked gazes for a long moment before she whispered, "I'm going to be now."
She never tore her eyes from his as she thought for a long moment and then bent her head toward the bowl preparing to blow them into darkness…
…and Luke's loving eyes were the last sight she saw before the darkness washed over her.
- - - - - - - - - -
When the inn had been up and running smoothly for a few months, Lorelai found herself searching for another project, one that could satisfy her on a few different levels.
After much talking, she and Sookie agreed that Lorelai going on a date would be the best way to go. It would satisfy her need to get out of the house, her need for witty banter, her need for male companionship, and her need to find a boyfriend.
The idea had been percolating for a few weeks while Sookie took on her role as scheming best friend with gusto. Sookie was confident she'd finally found someone who'd fit Lorelai's specifications in all areas, so she brought her findings to work one day.
"Into the kitchen!" Sookie prodded Lorelai before being met with the response, "Please do not tell me anything else is broken, Sookie… Our pockets just can't take it!"
"No, no, nothing like that," Sookie said.
"Phew," Lorelai said, mocking her with the backward wipe of her arm across her brow and a smile.
Sookie rolled her eyes before pouring Lorelai a cup of coffee and placing a folder in front of her on the counter.
"Now, before you say anything, just listen. Joshua Lacky. 6' 4". Wealthy food critic… Any of this sounding appealing?"
Lorelai opened the folder and was faced with the picture of an apparently wealthy man… and a very handsome man at that.
Pretending to ponder for a moment, Lorelai assumed a sarcastic stance of thought before declaring, "Handsome and rich… Where do I sign up!"
Sookie clapped her hands and jumped up and down before saying, "Good, I'd hoped you'd say that. You're meeting tomorrow night at the Zinfandel Grill."
"Sookie!" Lorelai gasped as she watched the figure of her friend retreat out the door with a quick wave of her hand.
Turning back toward the counter, Lorelai thought, 'Joshua… Hmm… Nice name for a nice man,' before closing the folder and returning to her desk.
- - - - - - - - - -
The next evening, Lorelai was sitting at the table she shared with Joshua, hoping she wasn't being too rude by leaning on her hand and staring over his shoulder at the food received by the next table.
"So then I said, it's crazy to mix white wine with a pasta like this! You're just asking to be a three star restaurant! Do you know what I mean?"
"Oh, yeah… That wine," was the only response Lorelai could muster.
"It's so nice to go out with a woman who really understands where I'm coming from," Joshua began, taking Lorelai's hand, and forcing her to sit up straight, "And you are so beautiful."
"Gee… Thanks," Lorelai began, forming a plan.
"Ooo," she moaned, clutching her stomach.
"Are you alright?" Joshua asked worriedly.
"Yah, I think I might have had too much red wine and pasta combo. It's making me feel kinda sick."
"I knew that tasted funny," Joshua said angrily.
"Why don't you go tell the chef?" Lorelai suggested. "I'll wait here."
"Are you sure you're going to be alright alone for a minute?" he asked.
"I'll be fine… Trust me."
"Be right back," he said, releasing her hand and moving toward the rear of the restaurant.
"Finally! Freedom!" Lorelai said, before grabbing her purse and making a mad dash to the front door, barely hearing the inquiry of the hostess as she made way to her car.
"Thank God I had enough sense to say that I'd meet him here," she said as she unlocked the door and strapped herself in, starting the engine.
When she had reached the exit signaling that she was in Stars Hollow, Lorelai allowed some of the tension to ease out of her shoulders and off of the accelerator. Pulling over in front of the diner, she knew that dessert was in order as a treat for making it through the long evening.
She walked into the diner, still dressed in her cocktail dress and heels, plunking down at the counter.
Not seeing who the customer was, Luke shouted out from the kitchen, "What can I get you?"
With a little laugh, Lorelai answered, "The last four hours of my life back."
Luke's head came from behind the door way, and his facial expression showed his confusion and happiness at who was sitting in his diner. Wiping his hands on a rag, he inquired, "And why is that?"
"Because I just got back from one of the worst date of my life," Lorelai sighed.
Luke's face fell, and he merely grunted in response, as he suddenly became fascinated with cleaning his hands.
"I mean, all we talked about was food, of course, because he was a food critic, and I was so stupid to believe that I was ready to go through this mindless process of finding someone and then being let down again. I'm too old for this! That was the whole point of this evening, to get out again and to experience what I've been missing, but then I realized that I haven't been missing anything. I can't handle the monotony of going through men trying to find the perfect one. I want the one right now! Why can't I find him, Luke?"
Luke glanced up and moved away toward the back before announcing, "Maybe you're looking in all the wrong places. I assume you want ice cream?"
"Yah," Lorelai said, the frustration seeping out of her.
"Coming right up," Luke said, before turning toward the kitchen.
A few minutes passed before Luke came out of the kitchen, holding a large bowl of ice cream. Lorelai smiled enthusiastically, picking up a spoon in anticipation.
Luke placed the bowl carefully in front of her and rotated it a bit before stepping back from the counter and toward the kitchen again.
"See, you're the kind of man I need!" Lorelai announced, with a swoop of her spoon. "You keep me well fed and in the ice cream!"
Luke just nodded, and went into the kitchen, leaving Lorelai by herself.
"Mmm," Lorelai said, in anticipation of the treat awaiting her in the bowl. She stuck the spoon in and lifted a small helping to her mouth, savoring the vanilla and chocolate combination. She turned to gaze toward the bowl and gasped when she peered inside.
Written meticulously in chocolate syrup was a message saying, "Lorelai, will you go out with me?" With a look of confusion on her face, she dropped her spoon on the floor and picked up the bowl in further inspection.
From the kitchen, Luke could hear her tiny gasp, and the clatter of the spoon as it hit the floor. He smiled a little and went back to cleaning the stove.
Lorelai's stomach dropped after she fully thought about what Luke had just asked her. Could she date Luke? She swiveled off the seat at the counter and took small, slow steps toward the center of the room.
Luke could hear the hesitation in her steps and realized that she was leaving. He subconsciously began to scrub the grill harder as he waited for the tinkle of the bell that would seal his embarrassment. He waited, but it didn't come.
Feeling a small tap on his shoulder, he dropped his sponge in surprise and turned around. He was face to face with Lorelai's inquisitive stare. Luke blushed when he realized that they were less than a foot apart, and he cleared his throat like he always did when he was nervous.
"Are you aware that we keep experiencing really big moments through the guise of vanilla and chocolate?" Lorelai stated, as she held up the bowl to meet his gaze.
"Umm… Yes?" Luke answered.
"Good," Lorelai said with a smile. "Because you know that I can't refuse chocolate."
Luke's face pulled into a puzzled glare, and he began to ask Lorelai what exactly she meant by that, when her hand reached around the back of his neck and pulled him into their first kiss.
As soon as Luke's lips met hers, Lorelai knew that she was home, so she stopped running. Gradually she brought her other arm up around his neck, but the moment was penetrated by the sharp crack of porcelain as the ice cream bowl fell to the ground, breaking into a million pieces.
They pulled away from one another at this, Lorelai's hands still on the back of Luke's neck, and his arms around her waist.
"So is that a 'yes' to my question?" Luke inquired.
Lorelai smiled at his nervous demeanor.
"What do you think?" she countered, as she pulled him into another heated embrace…
… and on the floor, the chocolate and vanilla were mixing together among the shattered porcelain.
- - - - - - - - - -
Their first date was typical of any other they'd been on in their lifetimes. The man picked up the woman at her home, standing nervously on the porch with a bouquet of flowers and a pasted smile. The woman opened the door with gusto, the soft scent of perfume blowing across the man's face as he presented her with the flowers and took in the dress and frame of the one before him. The woman would then climb into the man's car and they'd be off to a romantic setting of candles and elegance.
The only difference was that this was Lorelai and Luke, and while they both carried the nervous air that could only be attributed to pre-date jitters, they knew each other and were comfortable in their own skin. There were no false fronts, no pretenses, only the personalities of two individuals who had waited their whole lives for this moment.
Luke, wisely, arrived ten minutes later than the original time he'd told her he'd arrive. He knew her too well already.
With a quick snap, she opened the door, hopping as she put on a high heeled shoe, before hurriedly telling Luke to come in and make himself comfortable, and that she'd be ready in two seconds.
Luke awkwardly settled himself on her couch, looking around the room anxiously. Fingering the red petals of the roses he brought her, he willed his stomach to settle down with a quick, "You can do this. You've known her for years."
"Ta-da!" was the announcement that presented Lorelai's impending arrival into the room, and Luke stood quickly.
"All ready!" she said. "Let's go!"
"Uh… Umm… These are for you," Luke said, shoving the flowers in her direction.
"Oh, Luke! They're beautiful!" she said, burying her face in the red roses.
Lorelai traipsed off to the kitchen, placing her new flowers in a vase, as Luke let out a sigh of relief that she'd liked his selection.
She came back into the room, placed a small kiss on his cheek, declared that she was famished, and headed out the door to his car.
Smiling, Luke followed the woman who changed his life.
- - - - - - - - - -
Two hours into the date, both realized that this was unusual. They'd known each other for years, had anticipated an awkward evening, and had not run out of things to discuss. From the new renovations made to the town gazebo all the way to Britney's new love affair, the conversation never lulled, leaving two wide-eyed adults in its wake.
When the night drew to a close, it was Lorelai who was feeling awkward. As she climbed from Luke's truck, she wanted to ask him in… or up, if being completely honest. Luke walked her to the door, sensing her general unease, and thinking himself to be the cause, he moved to his exit routine.
"Well, I had a really great time…" he began, shoving his hands in his pockets like a teenager.
"Oh, me too, me too," Lorelai said absently.
"Okay, goodnight," Luke said with a wave of his hand, before turning on his heel and heading toward the car.
"No, no, no," Lorelai said, stomping her foot and heading down the porch stairs after him. "No, it's not a good night yet."
Luke turned around just as Lorelai threw herself into his arms and said, "You didn't even kiss me!"
She then leaned up on her tip-toes and gave Luke a kiss that belayed all of the feelings she was keeping inside. As they melted into one another, Luke finally had to come back for some air.
"Wow… That was some goodnight," he said with a laugh.
Lorelai wound her arms around his neck and looked over his shoulder, saying, "You know, Luke, it's pretty dangerous for a helpless female to be staying by herself at night nowadays. I mean, robbers are just looking for someone like me who they can take advantage of…"
"What's your point?"
"Well, umm… wouldyouliketostaythenight?"
"What?" Luke asked, "I couldn't understand you."
Giving up her embarrassment, Lorelai lifted her head from Luke's shoulder and looked him in the eye, repeating her question.
"Yah, I think that can be arranged," Luke said with a smile, before kissing her again.
"I mean, I'll need to change those locks and stuff because you're totally right about robbers looking for your house… It's easy prey…" Luke rambled.
Lorelai laughed before taking his hand and leading him toward the house. "Forget staying the night," she said. "Would you like to stay forever?"
- - - - - - - - - -
Luke moved in three months later.
And that was just the beginning of the whirlwind romance that left Lorelai shaking and Luke asking himself why he hadn't made a move for her years before.
The town had rejoiced at the sight of their favorite bachelor and his longtime crush finally confirming what everyone had seen for years.
In the nine months that passed from their first date, to the day before yesterday, there had been so many firsts. Their first fight, their first shopping excursion, their first movie night, their first junk food day, and their first 'I love you.' Everything had been perfect, in the estimation of Lorelai and Luke, and neither could remember when they'd been happier.
But, like all good things, trouble started looming on the horizon. Luke could sense that Lorelai was getting restless of being in the same routine with him continuously, but whenever he asked if there was anything he could be doing differently, or if she was unhappy in any way, he was always met with the flippant wave of her hand.
After two weeks of this, Luke began to pull away, familiarizing himself in a cocoon of 'alone' that he'd been accustomed to for so many years. He began working longer hours at the diner, and came home later and later, and in a worse mood every time.
Lorelai knew what was going on, and simply smiled at him all of the time.
Luke knew they were over.
- - - - - - - - - -
Luke stood at the counter, wiping away the remnants of the dinner rush and beginning his habitual cleaning before closing. As he was taking the dirty plates to the kitchen, he heard the tinkle of the bell and the closing of the door.
"Make it quick!" he barked. "I'm closing in a minute."
"Alright," said Lorelai. "I'll wait."
Luke walked out from the kitchen and grumbled a quick, "What are you doing here?"
Lorelai simply smiled at him. "I'm going to make you dinner. Now scoot away from the counter and give me some room."
"Whaaaat?" Luke asked. "I don't think that this is safe. You and fire. You and cooking. It's all a bad idea."
"Nonsense," she said, kissing him on the cheek and putting on an apron.
So Luke sat at the counter and waited for whatever she had to give him. "Just make sure it's not too greasy!" he yelled into the kitchen.
He got no response.
"I mean it, Lorelai!" he warned, before crossing his arms and resuming his defensive posture.
Lorelai came out of the kitchen with a big bowl, and a spoon.
"Eat up!" was her only prompt, as she took off the apron and folded it, resuming Luke's job of cleaning the counter.
Luke took a big breath and promised himself that he'd get down at least five spoonfuls of whatever it was, if only for Lorelai's sake.
He peered inside the bowl at the creation she'd made, only to feel a familiar wash of deja-vu. He gulped and placed his spoon to the side of his bowl, reading in shock the 'Will you marry me?' written in chocolate across the ice cream that met his gaze.
Luke slowly lifted his gaze and was met with the expectant face of Lorelai. He stood up and made his way around the counter, taking her in his arms, and as the town settled down for the night, they stood in a tight embrace that could only be understood by the other.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
A year had passed since their marriage, and the feelings of regret and sadness that used to control Lorelai's life was slowly melting away into feelings of love and happiness.
Sitting with Luke on the couch one November evening, Lorelai gazed at the movie they were watching and let her thoughts wander. She wondered how she could have such a wonderful thing happen to her after so much pain, and she knew instinctively that someone had to be watching out for her. Never in her wildest dreams would she imagine Rory's death leading to a marriage to Luke, but as she turned her head to look at his sleeping figure, she knew that she was the luckiest woman alive.
Gingerly she rose from the sofa, cradling her stomach in her hands and waddling toward the ottoman to retrieve a blanket for Luke. Making her way back to the sofa, she curled up beside him, tucking her legs underneath her and wrapping the blanket around her shoulders. She reached over the back of the sofa and up to Luke's head, removing the baseball cap that was a permanent fixture and ruffling his hair into some semblance of normalcy.
When asked about her pregnancy and names for the baby, Lorelai simply smiled and told them that she would decide on a name when she felt it was necessary. When asked if she knew whether it was a boy or girl, she shrugged and smiled, explaining that she and Luke wanted it to be a surprise.
Sitting up a little more, Lorelai cradled her stomach in a semi-hug around the new life… her new life. Smiling, she started cooing a soft lullaby, fully believing that talking to the baby would give her the clear advantage over Luke. She knew it was a girl. She didn't have scientific proof from the doctor that her child was female, but she just knew.
Sighing, she picked up the blanket, eager to get some rest. She tossed an end across Luke, covering him, and she put her head on his shoulder and snuggled against his side.
Outside it started snowing. The first snow of the year… and once again, it was time for a fresh beginning…