Chapter 5 The Baby Drinks Fairie Soda

Mr. Daae packed up the Daae family's few possessions and bought a gypsy cart from a toad named J. Thaddeus. It was a lovely, yellow cart, and it carried the Daaes comfortably. Christine had a little hammock to sleep in, and Mr. Daae had a cot and a coffee maker. In this cart, they began to travel the world.

One day, the Daaes decided to take a boat to a place called Ireland. Christine was one month old, and ready for adventure. Because of her alphabet soup influence, she could already speak, and she was happily singing in a beautiful voice an Irish song called Shan-von-Voght.

"Honey, that's a rather brutal song for an infant of your age to sing." Mr. Daae protested as his daughter loudly proclaimed the verse about 'hanging men an' women for the wearing o' the green'.

"Arra!" said a passerby, "Let the garl sing. Tis' nottin' but good Irish rebellion in that o' gig."

Christine blushed. "Thank you." She said.

"How olde are ye childer?" the Irishman asked.

"One month." Christine stated promptly.

"Arra! In me own day, the childer didn't start singin' against the bloody Brits 'till they was much older than that!"

"Yes, she's very... special." Mr. Daae said.

The Daae family continued on, and Christine finished her Shan-von-Voght and was moving on to Hi Rim Bo. After that she had decided to sing Rodney's Drum and Brian Boru. She continued with her musical pieces until something strange happened. It was a moment of her life that started a chain of strange events. It happened this way.

Mr. Daae decided to enter a pub to buy a double gin. The runes had said it was alright to leave Christine in the cart, and so he felt no danger in doing so. There Christine sat, warbling away at speedy Gaelic reels, when a fairie hopped in beside her.

"Nice tune ye got lassie!" he said, smoothing his long red hair.

"Oh, thank you." Christine replied, "Who are you?"

"I'm Toad-blood, lassie!" he answered, "Toad-blood of Briarwoods. Fairie hunter, m'dear."

"Oh! I've never met a fairie before. Are you like a goblin or an elf?" Christine asked.

"Pshaw!" Toad-blood laughed, "Them? No, m'darlin', a Fairie's a Fairie, and that's that!"

"Oh."

"Well, Parsnip -mind if I call you Parsnip?" Toad-blood asked.

"No, you can call me anything you want." Christine reassured.

"Well then, Parsnip, yer a purdy lass!" Toad-blood said, "An' I do enjoy puttin' a smile o' the faces o' beautiful women! So, what about a gift, eh?"

"Yes please!" Christine said. She loved presents.

"Here, havva swig o' this!" Toad-blood handed her a walnut shell filled with bubbly liquid.

"What is it?" Christine asked.

"Nuttin' but fairie soda!" Toad-blood said carelessly.

Christine drank it. It tasted like huckleberries and sheepsour.

"Mmm!" Christine sighed, "It's good!"

"Yeah, 'tis true!" Toad-blood agreed, "An' 'tis magic as well! Ye'll be singin' like a siren an' dreamin' o' folk ye never heard of afore the hour's up."

"What?" Christine asked.

"Ach, gotta run!" Toad-blood said, "Time to kidnap Lady MacCollery. Ta-ta, purdy lassie!"

Toad-blood flew away, humming snatches of Anachie Gordon as he left.

"Bye Toady." Christine called after him. She decided she would continue her singing, as she waited for her father to return. But, when she opened to mouth to sing, her voice seemed to have been replaced with that of an angel.

"Oh!" Christine giggled, "It's true! It's fairie soda! It's magic! Huzzah!"

However, the gift did not end there. After a few more rousing melodies ranging from Alleluia to In Trutina, she cuddle up for a nap. That was when her magic dreams began. She dreamt of a boy in a far away country called France. He was locked in a cage, and people were laughing at him and calling him mean names. Then he was forced to sing, and his voice was gorgeous! Immediately, although the boy was rather ugly, and although both he and she were still in their nappies, she fell in love. (And that was the last, though unmentioned, effect of the fairie soda.)