Chapter Nine- April
Well, Journal, we're back home. And you'll never guess what. No, it's not good news. In fact, it's bloody rotten. It was Scrimgeour that I saw on the way to Thurso, and he saw me for the minute that I wasn't in disguise. I could kick myself for being so stupid as to let my guard down. What would Mad-Eye say?
The git demanded an inquiry as to why I was halfway across the country with a "dangerous half breed, violent werewolf, and a known Dumbledore supporter." I thought my best chance was to play innocent and dumb. I immediately began shamming surprised and embarrassed that they had found out about my torrid, secret love affair with an outlaw, and how I know I should have known better than to trust him. My acting was superb, but it wasn't enough to fool Scrimgeour. Guess he knows Lupin would never go for me. So I got sacked. Dad will be so proud. He hasn't ever really trusted the Ministry.
I can't believe it. Me, without a job. I've held a post since I was sixteen! Now, I don't know what I'm going to do for work AND I've lost a spy for the order. With me gone, Kingsley is now our only link inside the Ministry. Well, him and Arthur, who's doing much better now.
I don't know how I'm going to pay rent. I didn't save up as much as I should have. And I don't think I want to tell my parents, they'll just worry.
They never did seem sure that I could make it as an Auror. They wanted me to pick something easier, safer, but I was so determined. I've wanted to be an Auror ever since they took Sirius away. I knew they had the wrong man, Sirius could never kill anyone. I wanted to protect the innocent, like no one had done for my cousin. I struggled for years, kept my marks up, and when I finally made it, they were so proud, they said they would never doubt me again. So much for proving myself, right?
I expect they'd want me to move back in with them so they can protect their idiot daughter from the outside world.
The Order is disappointed, but they understand. Remus, he's so sweet, he feels so responsible for the whole thing. I haven't told him that I tried getting off the hook by pretending that we were lovers, and I think I can let that little ( ok, huge) fib remain omitted. I don't know how he'd react, if he'd be insulted or what. Kingsley heard about it, and he'd better keep his mouth shut if he knows what's good for him. Ginny taught me her infamous bat-bogey hex.
I know that the only thing I've been properly trained to do it do hunt dark wizards, and that getting sacked has been a major blow, but I can only mope around for so long, and eventually I'm going to have to wash up and go job hunting. I suppose I could look to see who's hiring in Diagon Ally. I could be a bar maid at the Leaky Caldron, but I reckon I'd break more glasses than my wages could pay for. We'll see, we'll see. I'm a big girl. I can stand on my own two feet, and I'll make it somehow.
N.Tonks