A/N: I'm alive.

Chapter Nine

"Now remember, sweetie, don't be nervous. Just be yourself, and the record execs will love you. Okay?"

"Don't worry, Molly," I had said with a grin. "I'm not nervous at all."

And now I was here, in the recording studio. I was practically rubbing my hands together in delight. This was payback, indeed. This was about to become the epitome of payback.

Soon enough, the record executives had entered the studio. I greeted them all in my best, fake-polite, sugary-sweet Annie impression, hoping they couldn't detect the evil glint in my eyes. They were all in for quite a performance, and I couldn't wait to do in Annie for good. The best part about all of this was that, besides ending her career and killing her dreams, I would be doing the entire world a favor by preventing them from ever hearing another one of Annie's horrible songs. This was probably the most charitable act I would ever accomplish in my life.

"So, Annie, what will you be singing for us today?" the most official-looking man asked me, interrupting my thoughts.

"Well, I know that Irene, my manager, originally told you that I would be singing 'To Dream About You,' an original song of mine…" I paused for dramatic effect. I noticed that a few of the men's eyes lit up in anticipation, and the official guy nodded expectantly. "…But, instead I've decided to sing a classic favorite of mine. I'm sure you'll all recognize this song and remember the impact that it had on the evolution of music history. So, without further ado…" I cleared my throat, and then began.

"AT FIRST I WAS AFRAID, I WAS PETRIFIED! KEPT THINKING I COULD NEVER LIVE WITHOUT YOU BY MY SIDE. BUT THEN I SPENT SO MANY NIGHTS THINKING HOW YOU DID ME WRONG, AND I GREW STRONG! AND I KNEW HOW TO GET ALONG! AND NOW YOU'RE BACK! FROM OUTER SPACE! I JUST WALKED IN TO FIND YOU HERE WITH THAT SAD LOOK UPON YOUR FACE! I SHOULD HAVE CHANGED THAT STUPID LOCK, I SHOULD HAVE MADE YOU LEAVE YOUR KEY, IF I'D KNOWN FOR JUST ONE SECOND YOU'D COME BACK TO BOTHER MEEEE! GO ON NOW, GO! WALK OUT THE DOOR!" I really half-expected them to take this as their actual cue to walk out the door, but they all seemed to be completely stunned, mouths slightly agape.

"JUST TURN AROUND NOW! CUZ YOU'RE NOT WELCOME ANYMORE! WEREN'T YOU THE ONE WHO TRIED TO HURT ME WITH GOODBYES, DIDJA THINK I'D CRUMBLE, DIDJA THINK I'D LAY DOWN AND DIE, OH NO NOT I! I WILL SURVIVE! OH AS LONG AS I—"

And there it was. The single hand that went up, signaling me to stop. "…know how to love I know I'll stay alive…" I continued in a slight whimper, fading out. "Are you sure you don't want to hear the rest?" I asked innocently. "There's a few more minutes left—"

"Actually, I think we've heard enough," the official guy interrupted, standing up.

"Oh, well, would you like to hear anything else?" I persisted. "There are a few other classics in my repertoire…"

"That's quite alright," he replied, smiling weakly. "I think we've heard enough 'classics' for today." By this point, the other men had begun to stand up, too.

"Okay, if you're sure…"

"Yes. We are." He looked slightly uncomfortable.

"Wicked!" I announced. Then I immediately cringed. God, I really am Annie.

"Thank you," the man said half-heartedly, as they all filed out of the studio… at a rather rapid pace, might I add.

"Anytime!" I called after them, and the door slammed shut.

Have I mentioned that I'm a genius?

Later that evening, we were eating dinner in the Phillips' kitchen… some delicious filet mignon that Molly whipped up. She's incredible, really.

"Thish ish delishish," I said between mouthfuls.

Jack suspiciously eyed my plate. "Annie, you've been eating a lot more than your usual portion, recently…"

"What are you saying? You think I'm fat?" I nearly screamed. Okay, this was a little creepy. My previously non-existent feminine side was suddenly shining through.

"No, it's just, um…" he stammered, at a loss for words.

"I'm glad you like it, Annie," Molly interrupted, flashing a beautifully brilliant smile.

Marry me?

"I'm glad that you're glad that I like it," I replied brightly. Jack gave me a weird look, which I ignored. Suddenly the phone rang.

"You should answer that," Molly told me. "It might be you-know-who!"

I hoped so. This was bound to be hilarious. "Hello?"

"Hello, this is Rob Jennings from Sunnyside Records. Is this Annie Thelen?"

"Sure is!" I replied perkily, hoping to further emphasize Annie's creepiness.

"Congratulations, Annie! We've decided to sign you on a two-year deal! Now, you'll have to come into our office to fill out the paperwork, but we really feel that this will be the beginning of a beautiful partnership—"

"WHAT?" I nearly screamed, in utter shock and awe and… disgust, mostly. What the hell?

"Yes, we know you're probably just spilling over with excitement! And who could blame you! At first, my colleagues and I were taken aback by your performance, but we really think you've got the right image for stardom! With a bit of vocal coaching, you'll be on your way in no time. And, we realized,'70s hits are 'in' again, so perhaps you'll even get to sing your favorite 'classic'…"

This can't be happening. "Thanks…" I said warily.

"Be in our office Monday at two! And thank you!" He replied, hanging up.

I remained standing, clutching the phone, in a complete daze.

"Well?" Jack and Molly asked simultaneously. I nodded and smiled half-heartedly.

"Alright!" They were nearly jumping for joy… actually, no, they were jumping for joy. And hugging me and screaming. I wanted to die.

Now what?