Title: "Under My Skin" (Sequel to "When I Look in Your Eyes")
Characters: Toby / Ginger
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: No money made here...Not unless you want the 47 cents from under my couch cushions...
Author's Notes: I picked this messy relationship because I've been there myself...I'm a virgin writer, so any constructive advice, etc. would be appreciated...So, here we go...
1 - Toby
Friday night, sometime in June
I walk into my office hoping to get some work done only to find the "Terrible Twosome" in residence.
"I see you forgot how to read again," I growl, as I stare Sam out of my chair. "This my office, not the clubhouse."
Josh is lounging on my couch, smiling at me. "We're going out tonight to make trouble. Wanna join us?"
"Why would I? We have a government to run, in case you missed that in the last club meeting minutes." I said opening up a file, hoping they would get the hint.
"It's Cathy's birthday today," Sam said, speaking of his assistant, "And I promised her that we would honor her day with alcohol, dirty jokes and cigars."
Sensing my reluctance to this night of debauchery, Josh said, "C'mon Toby. CJ made me promise her that you would be there. She hates it when you drink alone."
"I get more drinking done when I'm not distracted."
"Aw, Toby," Josh said, deliberately whining, "All the other kids don't think you like them."
"That's because I don't." I growl.
Sam smiled, "Good, we'll count you in."
"We're leaving in about an hour. We'll swing by to pick you up." Josh said, jumping off my couch.
"I never-"
"An hour, Toby!" Josh laughed, as they headed out the door.
I cursed my childish co-workers and vowed to not be there when they came back. But for some reason the thought of another night working late at the office with a nightcap at my local watering hole wasn't appealing. Lord knows I can do that any time.
I look out into the bullpen. Ginger is working at her desk, unaware of my observation. I haven't seen her, having been on Capital Hill for most of the day. She answers the phone and suddenly laughs. I enjoy watching her like this, relaxed and happy and wonder who can change her mood in an instant.
"Hey, Bonnie," she says, setting down the receiver. "That was Sam. He said tonight's the night he shows me how to smoke a cigar," and she laughs again.
"Doesn't he owe you a couple of drinks, too?" Bonnie looked up from her filing.
"Yes, that makes it even better. Tonight, the party's on Sam Seaborn!" And she stood up.
Oh my god. She's wearing THAT dress. And Sam Seaborn is plying her with drinks?
I grab my phone. "Josh, tell CJ she has nothing to worry about. I'll join you tonight." As I hung up the phone, everything that I had tried so hard to forget suddenly came back to me in an instant.
It was election night. We had just won the White House. All of the pain, sweat and tears of the campaign was suddenly lifted and tonight would be the party of a lifetime. The champagne flowed; the music played and there was much hugging and kissing all around. For once I dropped my reserve and allowed myself to be touched, something I avoided since my divorce.
I watched Ginger all night. She seemed to glow with happiness. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. She was wearing a simple black wrap dress and high heels that showed off those long legs.
Once or twice I almost found the nerve to approach her, but she was always being swept away by some guy, either for a hug or for a dance. She danced with everyone, from campaign workers to the newly elected, President Bartlet. Leo McGarry, I seemed to recall, managed to get a slow dance with her. The old dog got to hold her close. As for Sam, I think he was trying to hug, kiss and dance all at the same. I was about to break in when I saw her excuse herself and leave the ballroom. I tried following her to make sure she was okay, but the crowds were too great and I had know way of knowing where she went.
I gave up and was on my way to the men's restroom when Ginger stumbled head first out of the women's and into my arms.
"Toby! I haven't seen you all night." Ginger exclaimed, giving me a hug and a sisterly kiss on the cheek. "The champagne turned Sam into an octopus so I had to excuse myself." She looks straight at me, her blue eyes sparkling and a playful smile on her lips.
I kissed Ginger. To this day I don't know what possessed me. I kissed her and she responded. Her kisses were warm and tender. Sweet heaven, her mouth tasted like champagne and chocolate. I held her tighter as if I couldn't let go.
Somewhere, in the distance, there were voices and we quickly separated. Ginger was about to flee into the women's restroom, but I grabbed her hand and pulled her through another doorway to what I thought was a deserted room. In the shadows, we saw two figures dash out another door.
Ginger laughed. "I see we're not the only ones who want to be alone." Then I hear her say quietly, "Maybe we should go someplace a little more private."
I wasted no time. We managed to get up to my hotel room without being seen by anyone we know or thought we knew. I kissed her uncontrollably in the elevator, but when we got to my room, I froze. I didn't know what to do. I was as nervous as a schoolboy on his first date. I wait by the door.
"Ginger? Is this okay?" I ask, hoping she'll tell me to go to hell and leave.
She smiles and holds out her hand. "Toby," she said. It was the only encouragement that I needed.
I took her hand and kissed her with all my might. How long had it been since I embraced a woman with such passion? Not since the earliest days of my marriage to Andie had I felt like this.
My mouth found the tender spot on her neck that nearly made her knees buckle. My fingers slowly massaged her beautiful, soft breasts as I slowly traced kisses down her neck and along the v-neck line of her dress.
"Toby," she kept whispering my name. "Toby."
I had just found the tie of her dress and pulled it open when there was a loud banging on the door and someone shouting for me.
We both froze. It was a voice we both recognized.
There was another bang on the door. "Toby, it's Josh. The President wants to see you!"
By this point, Ginger had pulled herself away from me and straightened her dress. Without a word, she grabbed her purse and jumped into the clothes closet. She understood what was at stake if anyone found her in my room.
"Just a moment," I roared. I checked my face for lipstick and then cursed Josh and the President soundly as I opened the door. I would have to add Sam to the list for he was there too. You idiots! I wanted to rage, but I only glare at them.
"Hey what took you so long?" Josh said with a goofy grin. "You got a woman in there?"
"Yeah, I'm having hot steamy sex," I snapped as I shut the door, hoping Ginger would understand.
************
Ginger and I never spoke about that day again. In fact, to ensure that I would never lose control of my lust, I went to personnel and requested Ginger to become one of my assistants. At the time I thought it a perfectly reasonable solution to a potential emotional involvement. By working together, she would get to know my habits; I would get to know hers. We would learn how to hate each other. Problem solved.
Besides, my heart still belongs to Andie. I couldn't possibly betray our marriage like this.
Except for one small thing, I remind myself as I prepare to leave for the pub. You're still attracted to her. Otherwise, why would you be chasing after Sam to make sure he's not chasing after Ginger?
**********
2. Ginger - At the pub, later that night
The night was turning out to be what I needed. The company, the music, the alcohol and the raucous behavior were what I wanted to wipe a horrible month out of my mind.
Not that working for Toby was ever a piece of cake. He's surly and ungrateful even on his best days. But for some reason, the past month, he thoroughly lived up to his mother's assessment of being "a pain in the ass". He's been so nasty and critical that Leo said something to him about his behavior. Which only made things worse, as Toby thought one of us snitched on him. None of us has admitted it but we in his group suspect that it was one of the other senior staffers.
"Something has to be bothering him and no one, not even Leo, can figure it out," Margaret told me that night. We were sitting at the bar, away from the rest of the party.
"Do you think it has anything to do with his ex-wife?" Margaret asked, as I gulped down the rest of my Tom Collins.
"It's always about the ex," I said, "Look at Leo and Jenny. It's always an issue when the women leave first."
"It's spooky that he still wears his ring," Margaret wrinkled her nose at the thought of it. "Besides who would want a moody, temperamental man like Toby Ziegler?" And on that note, she wanders away.
I shrug my shoulders, hoping I wasn't blushing too much. But I want him, I think to myself. I want to smooth away his troubles and kiss him till whatever pain there is goes away. What am I thinking? I give my head a shake. Damn! I need to date someone. Anyone. Have a fling even. Just to get this man out of my mind!
I look around the darkened pub and at first I only see the people I work with. Sam and CJ are talking Josh and Cathy out of having a shots contest with Donna. Carol and Charlie are discussing books and other members of the staff are caught up in their drinks and conversations. It takes me only a moment to locate Toby, set a little way off from the rest of us, watching, nursing his bourbon.
I signal the bartender for another drink. As I wait, a man appears at my side. And he's not anyone that I work with either. He's a good-looking man, with smooth brown hair and warm blue eyes. He smells good. He smiles. His teeth aren't crooked. I smile back. Good start Ginger. We talk a little and I get his phone number. I wander back to my coworkers.
"I saw you talking to that guy." Cathy said, with a wink. She had a shot in one hand and a cigar in another. "Hey, everyone, Ginger got a man!"
You would think I had announced that I was going to blow up the White House by the way everyone reacted. The assistants wanted to know what he looked like. Sam wanted to know what type of job he had. CJ hit Josh on the head. "See? That's what I get for talking to you. I miss the eligible men."
Then I notice that Toby has heard this whole conversation. He's just sitting there, staring at me. There's something happening between us. I can feel it. It takes every ounce of control to tear my eyes away from his and ask Sam for a cigar and another drink. It was time to get Toby out of my life. And if it meant alcohol and Sam Seaborn, so be it.
"Here you are, my dear." Sam said, flashing one of his dazzling smiles at me. He pulls out a cigar from his shirt pocket. "Will you remember me when you leave us for this man of mystery?"
I laugh and begin to revel in the glow of the Sam Seaborn charm. "Now, how do I do this?"
"First of all," Toby's voice came from behind us. "You don't smoke that piece of crap." Toby took the cigar from me and stuck it back in Sam's shirt. "This is what the lady should have," and he pulled a cigar from his pocket. "Very mild but with good flavor." He peers at the mixed drinks in front of me. "And not with that. Bartender, two brandies." He touches me, ever so lightly on my elbow, and, as if under a spell, I get up from the bar stool and follow him to his chair. Oh my god, it's happening again. What am I doing with this man?
Toby explains the cigar to me. The leaves, the hand rolling process, how it burns. Then he lights it for me and I take it. As my mouth encircles the end, I feel the intimacy of his mouth in mine. The thought makes me cough. He chuckles and reminds me to puff, not inhale. Surprisingly, I enjoy my cigar and the brandy, although after drinking it, I don't know how I can get out of my chair, I'm so drunk.
"Ginger," Toby is speaking to me. I focus on him. I hear him chuckle, something I haven't heard in ages. "Let me drop you off at home."
"Mmmm, good idea," is all I can manage.
We made our exit quickly while everyone else make plans for another bar. As we leave, I wobble a little so I grab Toby's arm. "It must have been the cigar."
He laughs softly. "I think I'll limit your brandy next time." I smile at the words, "next time" but try not to read anything into it.
He drives me back to my apartment and escorts me up the stairs and into my apartment. "My roommate's gone," I say, dumping my purse and coat on a chair. "Would you like anything?" He just looks at me. "Toby?" I reach for his arm and he pulls me to him.
"I'm weak," he whispers and then kisses me.
I lose myself in the kiss. I forget work and the daily drudgery and the constant brow beatings I take from this man. I forget about the phone number in my purse. I forget about the ring on Toby's left hand. The only think I know is his mouth on mine, his arms around my body, crushing mine to his.
I don't remember how, but we managed to make it to the couch. My shoes and hose came off and my dress was about to be next. Toby ran his hands over my dress.
"I used to dream about this dress," he said, "You look so beautiful in it, you make me lose all reason." He toyed with the small string at my waist.
"I don't think Josh and Sam will appear if you pull it." I said with a smile.
Toby chuckled and kissed me again. "Sweet heaven," he whispered, when we came up for air. He looked at me square in the eye and I saw the subtle shift in his mood.
"Ginger, I should go." He said.
From the tone of his voice, I knew it would be fruitless to argue. "Of course," I say. I get off him and close my dress.
As Toby fixes his shirt and gathers up his suit jacket, I give it another try. "It's late. Toby, why don't you stay the night?"
"Ginger, you know I can't. We might do something we both regret."
"I don't regret anything, Toby. Not with you."
Toby shakes his head and gathers me into his arms. He holds me for a long time but makes no move to kiss me.
"Good night, my angel," I barely hear Toby whisper. I look at him with bewildered eyes. He kisses me gently and bids me good night.
I lock up after him and go to bed immediately, numb from Toby's rejection. I cry a little and curse him to try and make myself feel better. But nothing will take away how I feel about him. I hate Toby. I love Toby. I cry harder till I fall into a dreamless sleep.
To Be Continued (?)
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