Author's Note: Just a little warning...this story, if you haven't figured it out by now, is kind of long...and dramatic...and twisty...and angsty. And it's nowhere near done so for those that deem it too long or too sad, I now am taking the gun away from your head that I was using to force you to read this. Okay? Not to be a bitch and I am soooo grateful for breaking 1,000 reviews but I have all kinds of crap going on with work and everything else and I try my best to bust out these chapters DAILY for you guys so cut me a little slack and stop the bitching. I'd rather you not read and review than just needlessly complain. And I take in to consideration that you guys are really into this and that makes me feel good, like I'm doing something right but remember...this is only fiction! And fan fiction at that! Give me a break. I'm just a writer and they're just characters. It's not like I'm going home and having dinner with Nathan, Megan, and Haley, lol...

He watched her in the field of purple and pink and yellow colors. Flowers were everywhere. God, it was so beautiful. So perfect. Like a little piece of Heaven on earth. He couldn't help but smile. She was dressed in all white. Her tanned skin seemed to glow and her long, auburn hair fluttered in the passing breeze.

He came closer. He could see the tiny bundle in her arms. He could see the beautiful sleeping face and a huge grin crept to his lips. She looked up at him and smiled as well before looking down at the precious package she was holding. She beckoned him to come join them. He increased the pace of his steps so that he could be with his family.

Soon he was in front of them. Instinctively his arms reached out but she didn't accept his hand. The smile was still on her face but she seemed to be looking past him, through him almost. He turned and followed her eyes. Then he saw the other man come up behind them with arms outstretched. The tall, skinny, other man with the spiky brown hair, wide blue eyes and baby face. He went to them, wrapping his arms around the two. They looked like a beautiful, picture perfect, happy family…

"No!" Nathan awoke with a start.

His breathing was coming in radical spurts and his entire body was covered in a cold sweat.

"Baby? What's wrong?" Meg asked as she sat up.

Nathan could hardly speak.

"I…I…"

"Honey, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. It…it was just a bad dream", he managed.

"You sure? You're soaking wet and you're shaking."

"I'm okay."

"You want to talk about it?"

He shook his head.

"No. I'm just gonna get a drink of water."

He kissed her cheek before climbing out of bed.

"Nathan…"

"I'm fine. Really Megan. Go back to sleep, babe."

She nodded uneasily as he made his way through the darkness. He cut on one of the dimmer hallway lights that led the way downstairs. He grabbed a glass from the cupboard and filled it with ice water, before splashing some from the tap on his face.

There was no way he would be able to sleep after that dream. He was afraid to even shut his eyes. It had affected him like nothing else. So real. So vivid. Just the thought made him shudder.

He peered upstairs to make sure all was quiet and his wife was safely tucked in bed. When he was certain she was sleeping, he carefully opened the downstairs closet, the one that proudly housed his "pack rat junk" as Megan liked to refer to it. It was mostly sports memorabilia from his high school and college days. But buried underneath the debris, was a safe deposit box. Nathan lifted it and carried it with him to the large, downstairs bathroom. He locked the door and turned on the faucet before taking a seat on the edge of the tub.

Nathan knew the combination by heart. It was the same code for his locker at Tree Hill High. He put in the numbers and like magic, the box opened. He rummaged through the old pictures. He and Dan fishing in South Carolina. On the golf course with Royal. At the beach with Tim. At a kegger with Lucas.

Then there were the other photos. The ones pushed to the rear. Nathan retrieved them. There was the one on the beach at their wedding day. He looking handsome in his dark suit and Haley looking beautiful in that white dress. The other one that Lydia had taken as the newly married couple stared deeply in each other's eyes. Polaroids from the reception. Snapshots of them goofing around in the apartment. At the River Court, at the café…pictures, memories everywhere.

Nathan dug a little deeper to find the photo he was looking for. The newest one to the collection. The one past the collection of her CDs. The one he had cut from a magazine and hastily stuffed in the box before Meg could find out what was going on. The picture that had been printed in probably every magazine in the world. The one of Haley, shirt exposing her stomach, hand in hand with Chris Keller on the streets of New York.

She was pregnant…that was a given. It was no denying that it was a baby and not the result of one too many carbs. The bump was round and protruded enough from her body to be noticeable. The articles had said that she was about three months along and judging from the visual, they were right. Three months. Three months prior, they had been in the Dominican Republic. Nathan looked up at the calendar on the walls. The pink one with the picture of the cute little puppies that Megan had insisted on hanging up.

He was right. Three months prior had been the divorce. He could close his eyes and see the lavish penthouse suite. He remembered the taxi ride to the judiciary office. He remembered her coming in, late and breathless but at the same time breathtaking in that little sundress. The signing of the papers, the cheap shots at each other, her getting him bombarded by teenage fans to get back at him for not sharing a cab earlier. Then the night had come and with it brought unspeakable, unthinkable destruction and terror. The sights, the horrified people, the crashing wave, the screams, the fear, water everywhere, mosquitoes, clinging to the tree, trying to save Haley, swimming for a hut that seemed to move further in the distance when he knew it was their only chance at survival! God, his legs had ached so bad. He didn't know he had made it. Probably adrenaline and will alone. The sights, the sounds, the smells, the pain! God, he could still feel it! Nathan let out a huge gasp. Sometimes, it was like he was there and it was happening all over again.

He laughed in spite of himself. In the midst of turmoil, had been their only time together in years. He wished it had gone differently. He wished he had told her what he wanted to tell her all those years ago. All those lonely nights in the apartment spent staring at a cold, empty space. Dammitt! He should have told her that he loved her. But he didn't. Instead, he showed her. And what had been the outcome of that lost and forbidden final act of love?

She had always been good with kids. She loved kids. In addition to school, tutoring, being a wife, working at the café, and practicing music, somehow she found the time to volunteer at an orphanage. He had watched her with the kids a few times. They really loved and he knew someday she would make an excellent mother. They had talked about it a few times. Lying side by side in bed in the darkness, happily discussing dreams for their future. He wanted two kids, a girl and a boy. Haley wanted seven! They agreed to disagree or at least negotiate but sadly it had never come to that. There had been no time. No time for babies or even more dreams of them before the marriage had gone sour.

He stared at her bare belly. Could it be? Could it really be? Did God dare play a cruel and ironic joke by recreating in a way the Dan/Karen/Deb scenario. Nathan thought hard. They hadn't used a condom but then again how could they have? It's not like they were readily available and even if they had been, who would have guessed what would have happened after a day and a half in the hut?

What if it wasn't his? What if it was Chris'? But she had said she hadn't slept with him. Never. Not once in seven years. And he had been expected to believe that. But she wouldn't lie…or would she? Why not? She had lied in the past. She had looked right in his face and blamed Taylor for making up stories about an alleged kiss between her and Chris. But it hadn't been Taylor. It was Haley who was lying. She had looked in his face and lied once before, why wouldn't she do it again?

She knew how important family was. She knew what he had gone through with his own parents. What Lucas' life had been like without a father. If it were true, if her child was his, she would have told him. She wouldn't put him through that. Or an innocent baby. It was Chris'. It had to be.

Then why did that make him so goddamn angry? Nathan had his own life and his own kid on the way. He was married to Megan. Why was Haley's life and choices bothering him so? She could do what she want. If she wanted Chris, if she wanted a family with him, then that was her prerogative. She had her life in New York and his was in North Carolina. What had happened briefly between them had been nothing more than a mistake filled epilogue for closure.

Putting the contents back, he locked the box and placed it back in its secure closet hiding place. Then he headed to the kitchen to rinse out his glass. He closed his eyes and he could see her. Her gorgeous naked body in bed. He could hear her moaning out in pleasure. But he wasn't her lover. No. Instead it was that weasel, Chris. On top of her, hands and mouth all over her, pumping in and out of her with a shit eating grin on his face desired just to get at Nathan

It was too much! In a daze induced rage, he screamed and threw the glass on the kitchen floor, causing it to shatter everywhere.

"Nathan…"

He looked up. In the darkness, he could make out Meg, in her robe.

"It's glass everywhere", he mumbled. "I dropped it. Sorry."

"It's okay. I…"

"Don't come in here. I don't want you to cut your foot. I'll clean it up, okay?" he said, getting the broom and dustpan.

She watched as he swept it up. He was still shaky. Still sweaty.

"Honey, is everything okay? Maybe you should come lie down."

"Yeah. Um, I'll be up in a minute."

Running his hands through his damp, dark hair he stumbled over to the bar. He grabbed the first bottle available and poured a few shots into a smaller glass before downing it all in one gulp. He knew she was watching his every move. He knew she was disappointed.

"Nathan…"

"It's okay. It's just for sleep, okay?"

She simply nodded. What else could she do or say? He managed a smile and put an arm around her as they walked back upstairs together. He helped her into bed and climbed in beside her.

"I love you", she said softly.

"I know", he sighed. "I know. I love you, too."