I'm here again with another slashy Luke/Wedge fic. This time, I'm delivering the promised ridicule for a reviewer of one of my other stories. As I've said, flames must be at least semi-informative, and, as to slash (because of my pairing choice), my policy has always been the following: don't like, don't read, don't share. Or be subject to extreme ridicule. Someone by the title of "usuck" (lovely name, by the way) didn't believe me and posted the following:

ur luke/wench storys suck! (i luv flaming people!) wtf? luke likes mara
jade! not som screwed up wench guy. toodles 4 now.

Hmmm…what an interesting review. And extremely unnecessary. I erased it because of my policy and because I have a tendency to laugh at stupid people. Besides, why should I listen to a person who apparently doesn't have the ability to spell? thinks I mean, for that matter, why should he/she complain about my pairing when the person obviously doesn't know who I'm pairing...who is this "wench" person anyway?

Does anyone have any idea how pointless stupid flames are?

So be nice. You can flame me, but I expect all flames to at least be slightly intelligent. Please keep that in mind as you read the following Luke/Wedge slash story.

Disclaimer: N-O-T—M-I-N-E.

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Some Guts

By BreathingFlames

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Wedge Antilles, thoroughly vexed after a day of malfunctioning snow speeders, stubborn, half-witted Taun-tauns, and bone-biting cold, slammed his palm against the door panel with unnecessary strength and stomped into the room. Eyes narrowed in general annoyance, he closed the door to his shared quarters and began to stomp about, preparing himself for sleep. He was plain frustrated, and therefore determined to make the most noise possible by abusing inanimate objects, chiefly his boots (he kicked them across the room and they slammed against the wall with a satisfactory 'bang!') and a very offensive tube of toothpaste which refused to be opened (it was chucked down the garbage chute with such force that it echoed).

Freezing and generally pissed off, the pilot was about to throw himself down on his cot when he noticed for the first time that his roommate's bed across from his own was occupied. Abruptly, his angry blunderings ceased and he stood there awkwardly, ashamed of his previous behavior.

Aware that he'd probably woken his friend, Wedge padded carefully to the cot and asked quietly, "Luke?"

No reply.

"Luke? Are you awake?" he questioned again, not sure what to think of the silence. It was interrupted only by the heavy breathing of Luke Skywalker, who was curled up in his blankets, sandy hair tousled and falling into his youthful face…

Wedge's stomach did an odd kind of flutter and he just took a moment to stare, taking in his beautiful companion.

"Luke?" He tried one last time, reaching down and softly touching the fair-haired man's shoulder. This time, when no answer came, the Corellian simply sighed and sat down on the edge of his friend's bed, supporting his head in his hands.

"You had some guts coming into my life, Luke." He hadn't really meant to say anything, but his thoughts just kinda flowed through his mouth. He suddenly realized just how much he had needed to say something…anything. It didn't matter that Luke was asleep (in fact, that was probably for the best). He just had to let it all out.

Like a flow from a broken dam, his thoughts and feelings suddenly came rushing out, morphing themselves into words…

"Life was so simple before I met you, Luke. Everything was Black and White, Darkness and Light, Rebellion and Empire. My goal was to help bring freedom back to the galaxy, and that alone," he paused, thinking.

"Then I met you."

"You annoyed and confused me at first. A mop-headed farmboy with wide, naïve blue eyes, dressed in worn-out desert clothing who was supposedly a Jedi-in-training who had saved the princess and was going to fly an X-Wing by my side. I'll admit, I was mad at first, and once or twice I made fun of you (in front of you or behind your back, it made no difference).

"But then we flew," another pause.

"We were dying out there, and we knew it, too. X-Wing after X-Wing exploded into a fireball while hurdling through space. Finally, me, you, 'n' Biggs were some of the last fighters left alive…and you took charge.

"I was pretty indignant at first, almost angry, but you handled us like a born leader (who would have guessed that it was your first time flying an X-Wing!), and I followed you as I would any general. If we could pull it off, we'd save everyone!

"And then Biggs got hit." The talking stopped as Wedge envisioned the moment clearly in his mind, attempting to collect himself.

"I thought then that we were done for. You were a farmboy from a backwater planet and your best friend had just been killed. I prepared myself for the end…"

"I'll spare you the details…let's just say that you did it. You saved us all, and you were even more the hero than before. What more, you became my friend. We were best pals and untouchable to the galaxy." Gazing into space, he began to stroke the downy locks of that golden hair, caught up in his memories.

"It wasn't until later that it started to happened…my insides began performing acrobatics whenever you smiled. I began to tease you just to hear you laugh. I would stare at you during meals just to see your eyes change their shade of blue while you talked…"

"At first I was only puzzled about my behavior. Dismissed it for deep friendship. After a while, thought, I admitted that it was something more, and decided that it was simply an 'infatuation' that would disappear in time"

"I was wrong. For two years now, it's been like this. I live for your grins and our brotherly hugs. I a flurry of butterflies within me every time your name is mentioned…" The longest pause of all came after this, the silence stretching on and on…

Finally, in a shallow whisper, "Do you want to know why, Luke?" a gentle break, "Because…because I love you."

With this confession released, the dark-haired pilot sighed heavily and caressed his friend's cheek softly before standing and crossing the room to turn out the lights. Lying down, he threw the covers over himself.

Silence in the room prevailed for several minutes, then, finally, a soft snore came from the direction of Wedge's cot…

Sapphire eyes opened as Luke Skywalker turned over onto his back and smiled triumphantly into the darkness.

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Teehee. Should I continue? Yes, I think I should…I won't update until I get three reviews!

Teehee.