Haley signed her name for what seemed like the hundredth time. She had dropped by the hospital to make preparations to have her baby that was due in 11 days. It was a facility popular among Manhattan's elite where plenty of female celebrities had given birth. It was simply standard procedure for the mother to be to pre register for special accommodations such as a private room and extra security to keep overzealous fans and prying paparazzi at bay.

"Ms. James, please take this package and look over our natural childbirth options", the nursing supervisor suggested. "Perhaps you can discuss with your obstetrician or midwife about our underwater birth feature."

"Underwater birth?"

"Yes, ma'am. It's very soothing for both mother and baby. A sterile and serene environment with your choice of background music as you welcome your child into the world in an environment much what it was like inside the womb."

She smiled politely, sounding like a rehearsed infomercial as she handed the packet to Haley.

"Uh, thanks but no thanks. I'm not really into the natural childbirth thing."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Actually, I would like to schedule a C-section in advance. That way I can be totally prepared, knowing the exact time and date the baby is coming and…well, let's face it. Who am I kidding? I am terrified of childbirth, natural or not."

"Your fears are common, especially among young, first time mothers. But I assure you childbirth is a beautiful, natural thing, not to be feared. C-sections, like any surgeries, have risks and the recovery can be challenging."

Haley smiled as she signed the last document.

"Thanks but uh…I'll take my chances."

After verifying she was all set, she grabbed her bag and headed for the elevator. She nodded and smiled at the stuffy, balding man standing to her right and the teenage girl to her left as the elevator began to descend to their designated floors.

"You're Haley James", the girl grinned excitedly.

"Guilty as charged", Haley half smiled.

"God, I love you. I have all your CDs."

"Thank you."

"Can you sign this?" the girl asked hopefully, handing Haley a paper and a pen.

"Sure. Um, what's your name?"

"Make it out to Lillian, two Ls please."

"Lillian, huh?" Haley asked as she signed. "That's a pretty name."

"Thanks."

They continued their ride, the sound of a persistent and annoying drip breaking the silence. Haley stared up at the ceiling.

"Wow, it must be a leak somewhere", she observed, standing on her tiptoes looking for a water spot.

The man next to her wrinkled his nose in disgust as he scooted closer to the wall.

"It's a leak alright but it isn't coming from the ceiling."

Haley looked at him until she noticed for the first time the warm wetness between her legs. All six eyes simultaneously looked at her crotch as a trickle slid down the leg from her skirt.

"Oh my God…"

"Gross", the man muttered nervously.

"Cool!" the fan exclaimed. "Haley James' water is breaking in an elevator with me. Damn, I wish I had a camera."

Haley clutched her belly as she pushed the button for the elevator to go back up. It wasn't time. It was too soon. It was 11 days for God's sake!

"Good luck", the girl called out as Haley exited onto the floor.

She rushed over to the admin desk where a medical secretary was typing on the computer.

"Can I help you?" she didn't even look up.

"Uh, yeah…I, I think I'm in labor."

"When's your due date?"

"11 days?"

"How far apart are your contractions?"

"I don't know. I don't think I'm having any."

The woman rolled her eyes as she chomped away on a wad of gum.

"Well, what makes you think you're in labor, honey?"

Haley sheepishly pointed to the puddle forming on the floor beneath her. The woman's eyes bulged as she began calling out to various people in talk Haley had only heard on reruns of ER. Before she knew it, she was in a wheelchair headed towards the maternity ward. A nurse ushered her into a private room where she was changed into a hospital gown.

"Is all this really necessary?" Haley asked the pretty nurse named Cathy who was assisting her. "I'm not due for almost another two weeks."

"We have to prep you, Ms. James."

"Please call me Haley. And what do you mean prep?"

"Well, Haley looks like your little bundle of joy just couldn't wait."

"What? What do you mean? Am I…am in labor?"

Cathy grinned.

"Labor? More like delivery, honey. The doctor is on his way."

Haley's eyes grew wide.

"What? Are you sure? I mean, it's not time."

"You're nine centimeters dilated and I can see the head crowning. I'd say it's time."

"What?"

"Thank God you got off that elevator or else you'd be giving birth in the parking lot", Cathy said as she put on her gloves.

The physician on call joined them.

"Hello, Ms. James. I'm Dr. Mahn. Looks like we're about to have a baby", he smiled as he situated himself in front of her as Cathy put her feet up.

"Okay, okay. Wait! Everybody just stop! This is not happening. It's not supposed to be like this…is it? I mean, isn't it supposed to like, hurt or something?"

"You're one of the lucky ones", Cathy winked.

"Okay but can't you take me to the OR? I requested a C-section."

"There's no time. You'll be at a full ten centimeters in minutes and if you give me three big pushes, I guarantee this kid will be out in a flash", Dr. Mahn said.

"Anybody you want me to all, Haley?" Cathy asked.

Haley closed her eyes. This wasn't going as planned. As if anything in her life ever had…

"Yeah…"

Seconds later, Cathy was on the phone dialing the number. It rang and rang until finally a groggy female voice answered.

"Yeah?"

"Taylor James?"

Taylor opened one eye.

"If you're the IRS, FBI, NYPD, or wife of the hottie I slept with last week, then no."

"What if I'm calling from the hospital?"

"Hospital?

"Yes. My name is Cathy Denton and I am a Labor and Delivery nurse here at Columbia Medical Center. I'm here with your sister, Haley."

"Haley bub? Is she okay?"

"She's great, she's just having a baby."

"A what?"

"A baby…"

"Duh, I know that. I just thought it wouldn't be for another…"

"11 days. Yeah, Haley is still in shock over that one herself. But she asked me to give you a call. If you can, you might want to get over here as soon as possible because you're going to be a new aunt any minute."

Cathy smiled as she heard the click of the phone. She returned to the patient.

"We're at ten", the doctor announced.

"Showtime. Haley, Taylor is on her way. For now I need you to scoot your bottom down."

Haley grunted.

"Oh God, I feel like I have to push."

"Good. This won't be easy but just follow your body's signals and focus all your energy on getting this little one out. You with me?"

"Yeah…I just feel this pressure on my lower back."

"It'll be over soon. This is gonna be a quick one. I'll be your coach until your sister gets here. You remember any of your Lamaze breathing techniques?"

"I didn't go to Lamaze class."

"Okay. No problem. We'll do this together, okay? You're fine. Now, are you comfortable or do you want to lie on your side?"

"This is good."

"Okay. Tilt your pelvis, round your shoulders and put your chin to your chest when you push. When it's time, I'll count and you give it everything you have. Alright? You ready?"

"I guess…"

"On my count, push Haley. Push hard!"

It was surreal. It was all happening so fast. Haley couldn't believe it. And it wasn't near as awful as she thought it would be. The original plan was to drop by the hospital, sign some papers and get a Swiss mushroom hamburger with onions on the way home. It was simple and the soaps and talk shows would be waiting for her. Now she was about to have a baby.

Haley grunted as she pushed forcefully. It didn't hurt but it took a lot out of her. She hoped it wouldn't take too many more pushes.

"Good job, Haley."

It went on for a few more minutes. Cathy would hold her hand and shout out instructions. Haley would push hard and the doctor would do whatever doctors did when a kid was half hanging out of its mother.

"Gosh, is it out yet?" Haley panted.

"Almost."

"Almost doesn't count", she frowned.

"Push again. Hard!"

Haley did as she was told but she gasped out loud. With the exception of fear, pressure and fatigue, delivery thus far hadn't been a horror story. Haley was virtually in no pain with the exception of mild cramps every few minutes that she was told were contractions. But as she went to push again, she felt a burning sensation below.

"Ouch! Dammitt!"

"You okay?"

"Hell no! It freaking stings!"

"You're fine", Cathy nodded. "Perfectly normal. Use your abdominal and uterine muscles as a guide. Now the baby is almost out and the head is going to cause bulging of your perineum."

"What the hell is that?" Haley asked, sweaty and breathless.

"The area between your anus and vagina…"

"Oh God!"

"Now I'm gonna use a warm compress and massage the area to relax your muscles down there."

"You're gonna do what?" Haley cringed. "No! That's private and gross and just…iiieewww! I don't want you to. My pineapple will be just fine."

"Perineum", Cathy laughed. "Okay. Suit yourself. We need another push."

Haley mustered the strength but screamed out loud as she felt tremendous pressure then sharp pain as the area in question began to stretch.

"Ow! Sweet Jesus, it hurts! Okay, okay! Cathy, help! Do something to the pineapple."

"Perineum", the nurse smiled as she was already on the job.

"Whatever! Perineum, pineapple, porcupine, who gives a damn? Just make it stop! Get this goddamned thing out of me! Someone help! Please!"

"Relax your thighs, Ms. James", Dr. Mahn advised. "The head is out. Would you like a mirror to see or would you like to reach down and touch the baby's head?"

"No, thank you", she heaved sarcastically.

"Okay, Haley, no more deep breaths. I want you to pant and blow for me so we can get the shoulders out."

The doctor suctioned the mucus and fluids from the baby's nose and mouth. Haley heard the faint cry of a newborn.

"One more push, Haley. You can do it! Push! Push…"

With all her might, she gave it one last huge go. Then the cries got louder. It was over.

"Congratulations, Haley! Here's your baby! It's out! You have a gorgeous, beautiful little girl."

Haley closed her eyes as Cathy cleaned off the wrinkled, wet, squawking creature that had caused so much ruckus over the last hour. When the baby was dry and clean, she was wrapped in a blanket and placed on her mother's chest.

"Do you want to hold her?"

Haley turned her head to the side as tears spilled down her face. They were not tears of joy.

"No", she finally whispered.