Buffy swaggered over to the bartender and plopped herself on top of the counter. She looked at him with the biggest eyes she could muster and gave a soft smile. Uhhhhh she thought as she said "Howdy, stranga'" to the poor bartender.

The bartender looked at her weirdly and shook his head. He hesitantly said "Maybe you need to go home." Why the hell do I do this job?, he asked himself as he watched this really drunken girl act like a lunatic.

"One moa on the house', big guy... " Buffy slurred, rolling off the counter.

The bartender ignored her and started taking the order of a middle aged british man with a popping vein and glasses. "Um, hello... you wouldn't have seen a young girl with blond hair around these... parts?" he stuttered.

"Look down." the bartender said. The man looked down and saw Buffy rolling along on the floor muttering to herself. He said "Oh, there you are, Buffy. Come along now." and with the help of a young pale man with platinum blonde hair and another young pale man with dark brown hair and a low forehead, they carried her kicking and screaming out of the restaurant with a redhaired girl following them.

Buffy sat in the back of a station wagon talking about how hot the bartender was when Giles, Spike, Angel, and Willow all sitting there rolling their eyes at her. Suddenly, Buffy's cellphone rang.

"Hullo? I am Buffy Summers... how are you?" Buffy burped loudly into the phone.
"Hello? is this the Slayer?" said an old British voice on the other line.

"Oh, hey baby, its you. Sometimes I wonder what I would do if you hadn't--." Buffy slurred.

"Pardon me?" said the voice

"Sometimes... you and me, naked, together. I just can't forget what happenned that time. Then you got all crazy on me and I was just like 'Hey, come on, man, chill'"

"I don't recall..." the voice finally said.

Meanwhile, the car had stopped at a stop sign and hadn't started again because everyone were silently listenning to Buffy horrified as she talked to this probably very important person on the phone. Angel gritted his teeth and grabbed the phone just as Buffy was saying "No, no this is so the Slayer. Why did you tell me that thing when we were there?"

He said into the phone "I'm sorry, the Slayer is apparently incapacitated at the moment. May I ask who's calling?"

"Oh, hello. My name is Albus Dumbledore and I need the Slayer to help me with a grave problem concerning Lord Voldemort."

Angel was about to say "Ohh, the evil sorcerer. He's killed like thousands and thousands of people. The shit he does is not sweet.Yeah, he's totally a bad guy. You better watch out for him." when Buffy grabbed the phone and said loudly into it "I know your mom", and then she proceeded to vomit all over the shoes of Angel and Willow.

Willow grabbed the phone and said into it "Buffy will get back to you when she is not dr-- uh, when she is herself." and then pressed End while wiping her vomit covered shoes on Buffy's leather jacket.

Albus Dumbledore looked at the phone as it started buzzing. What the fuck is going on with this fucking muggle device? Albus thought as he looked at the phone in confusion and anger. He had tried calling the Slayer and had apparently reached her while she was completely wasted. He then had talked to what sounded like a completely stoned surfer dude who had called Lord Voldemort "totally a bad guy." and had said that the "shit " that Voldemort did was not "sweet"Then, suddenly, he had been told that this Buffy Slayer girl would call her when she was not completely drunk.

Ridiculous muggles. They all should die, Albus thought. He stepped out of the London phone booth in bright purple robes. People gave him weird looks. He took out his wand and roared "Unomemorium" and suddenly everyone on the street started rubbing their eyes, and when they openned them, Albus had dissapparated.

However, what Albus did not realize when he dissapparated was that a nervous small and balding man with a silver glove on was hiding in the bushes, watching Dumbledore's every move. Stupid Dumbledore!