She backed into the elevator as he joined her. Their eyes never left each other but each felt it difficult to speak. There was so much tension and history between them.
"Thank you", she said so softly he barely heard her.
They ended up back on the ICU floor, mouths agape as Taylor, Chris, Karen, Lucas and Brooke watched Haley James and Nathan Scott of all people walk off the elevator together. His surprise appearance was met with hugs and relieved smiles.
"So what's the process for this?" he mumbled.
A nurse came out to explain.
"Mr. Scott, hematology will apply an anesthetic shot to your hip bone. Then a biopsy needle will be inserted in, which will draw a sample of the marrow that the lab will test to see if you're a suitable donor."
"Alright", he sighed. "Let's do it."
"You have to sign a consent form first and I have to ask you a few questions."
"Okay."
"Any known allergies to medication?"
"No."
"Tested positive for Hepatitis or HIV?"
"No."
"Currently taking any medications?"
"No."
"And are you a relation to the patient?"
Everyone held their breath, waiting for Nathan's answer to see what it would be.
"I…I'm her father", he finally replied as he signed his name to all the paperwork.
"Okay, then. Mr. Scott, take the elevator three floors down to the hematology unit and they are waiting on you."
Nathan nodded as he headed to the elevator. Lucas stopped him.
"You're a good man, Nathan Scott", he said.
He gave his older brother a knowing look before disappearing inside and following the nurse's directions. He signed in at the desk and was ushered in to a small room where he stripped down to his boxer shorts and climbed atop a cot. Blood was drawn from his arm as the assistant cleansed his hip.
"Are you ready, Mr. Scott?"
He closed his eyes.
"Go for it", he answered quietly.
As promised, a shot was administered to numb the pain. Nathan winced as he felt the discomfort and pressure of the biopsy needle sucking out the marrow of his bone. Just a small sample would determine whether or not his child might possibly live or die.
Life or death was in his hands. One daughter had already succumbed. Nathan hadn't been able to save her. If anything, he was still haunted by the fact that his actions may have contributed to her death, or at least her mother going into premature labor. This was his second chance. Redemption was calling. He hadn't been able to save one child but maybe he could save another.
"It's over, Mr. Scott. Good job."
"What now?" he asked.
"We send this to the lab and wait for results."
"How long will that take?"
"It depends. A couple of hours, usually. Could be longer."
"Okay."
"Did you provide a contact phone number for us to reach you?"
"Yeah but um, I'm gonna go upstairs and see my…the baby."
The nurse nodded as Nathan went back upstairs.
"You okay?" Haley asked as soon as she saw him.
"Yeah, just a little sore but it's cool."
"Alright."
"Uh, I'm gonna…do you mind if I see her?"
Tears filled Haley's eyes as she looked right at him.
"Of course not. I was gonna go but you go first…"
"Or we could see her together", he offered.
"Okay", she nodded hesitantly.
They signed in and changed into scrubs before entering the isolation unit. Haley held her breath as they walked to see their daughter together. She looked so tiny and helpless.
"Are those IV things hurting her?" he asked.
"No", Haley shook her head. "The doctor says she's comfortable."
The mother reached out and stroked her baby's delicate skin.
"What's up with her eyes?" Nathan stared. "Is that a birthmark?"
"Yeah."
"Pretty cool", he chuckled.
Haley smiled.
"She is so beautiful…"
"Yeah", he agreed with a nod. "She is…except for one thing."
"What?" Haley frowned.
"Her name. Lillian is okay. A little old fashioned but whatever. But Jamarah? What the hell kind of name is that? I can't believe you named my daughter, Jamarah."
They both flinched when they realized just what he had said. "My daughter". But it was the truth. The plain, obvious, bittersweet, ironic truth.
"Thank Taylor for that one."
"Taylor? I should have known."
"And Chris", Haley blurted out before she realized what she said.
Nathan's smile faded.
"That's cute, Haley."
"Nathan, I'm sorry…"
"Don't apologize. I'm sure Chris is filling in just fine as the step daddy. He always did like taking over where I left off, didn't he?"
Haley closed her eyes.
"Don't do this, please. Don't start. That's not true and you know it. Look, Nathan, I don't want to fight with you, okay? I don't have the energy or the time. Besides, this isn't about us or Chris…it's about Lillian."
"Alright", he said. "Look, I think I'm gonna go…"
"Fine. Just have your cell on so the hospital can reach you."
"It is but I'm gonna stick around. I'll probably just wait out there with Lucas and Brooke."
"Okay…"
Haley watched him leave. She couldn't believe he had shown up in the first place. She couldn't believe any of it had happened at all. It was like watching it all happen in a move it someone else. Sighing, she stroked the smooth skin of her sleeping daughter's forehead.
"I love you, Lillian", she whispered. "Mommy loves you very much."
Hours later she joined the others. The small, cramped space was horribly divided. Lucas, Brooke and Nathan sat on one side while Chris, Haley and Taylor had the other side. Karen sat in the middle of the imaginary Mason Dixon line. All were worn out emotionally, mentally and physically beyond belief.
"Mr. Scott? Ms. James?"
Hearts pounding, Nathan and Haley stood as the doctor approached them. It was the moment they had been waiting for.
"Yes?"
"I'm sorry. There was no match. However, give us a list of other family members as well as we have personnel still searching the Registry…"
The doctor kept talking but he may as well have been speaking Polish. To Nathan and Haley is language was foreign anyway. They hadn't heard anything after "I'm sorry. There was no match." They were dejected. Their little girl was dying and neither one of them could do a damned thing about it to save her.
