Chapter 6: Inspection
The Lord of the Western Lands had been taught from a young age never to shirk his duties.
Nevertheless, it seemed to Sesshoumaru that lately every single waking moment he had was filled with work and more work and just more damned work. If he could find time to sleep, work would haunt his dreams too. At the moment he was staying as a guest in the Imperial Palace at Kyoto, which didn't help the situation either. Sesshoumaru was busy enough; he didn't need some princess or royal concubine knocking at his door at night in sordid invitation.
Even in his rooms at the palace the paperwork was mounting. He didn't want to think about the veritable mountain of work that was no doubt accumulating in his own study back in his castle.
Letters and petitions aside, there was the Emperor's will to think about. The whole Japan was just about waiting for Sesshoumaru to accept or decline the throne. Naraku would likely try and usurp it soon, another headache on Sesshoumaru's plate, and the other lords… well, it was sad, but they were never going to stand a chance to make Emperor.
So considering that Sesshoumaru was at the moment the only obvious obstacle in Naraku's path, it was unsurprising but no less irritating when dozens of nobles clambered daily to ask his opinion on the current political climate. Of course, there was the Higurashi clan. If he got rid of the current stepmother ruling the place, and reinstated the true Higurashi heir, perhaps Naraku would stop going after him and start bothering the Higurashis with alliance talks instead.
That geisha, Kagome, who'd ran away. Sesshoumaru had bothered to find her; after all, she was a woman, and even her claim as heir to the Higurashi clan would be shaky. Although, Sesshoumaru did feel there was something fishy about the priest Inuyasha travelled with.
If he had time, he would confront the priest and go find the girl. Then he could get Naraku off his chest. Better still, make the Higurashi boy become Emperor, that would wash Sesshoumaru's hands of the entire affair.
On the matter of Naraku, the shogun was proof of how annoying hanyous could be. Sesshoumaru was experienced in hanyou matters. After all, he'd grown up with one, albeit one less irritating and dangerous than Naraku
And he didn't have time to entertain lords like Kouga or Houjou either. All their meetings were centred around arguments, strategies and then arguments about the strategies. Sometimes Sesshoumaru sent Jaken to sit in at the meetings. Most of the time Sesshoumaru sent Jaken to deliver scathing replies, something Jaken was expert at.
Most days were boring – at the crack of dawn, invitations to all sorts of meetings and balls and feasts would come pouring in. Jaken would then hasten to write malicious replies declining the invitations. A few hours later, when most of Japan's young, eligible ladies had woken, letters of admiration and declarations of love would arrive from them. Jaken took even more vindictive pleasure in replying with insults but every day the letters came anyways.
Apart from sometimes stopping Jaken from writing too-insulting letters, Sesshoumaru simply made sure his lands functioned well. He had long killed bandits and other whatnot that the other lords seemed eternally plagued with. The people didn't complain about their safety, although Sesshoumaru generally worked alone. (He didn't see the need to feed an army of greedy samurai and he was seriously considering getting rid of Jaken).
But now speaking of armies, that toad had started one. Sesshoumaru still needed to pay them a real visit. Last time he'd fled before the stench could get to him.
Slipping on his armour, he stealthily made his way out of his room so as to avoid any wandering princesses.
So what if it was midnight? Damn Jaken's army if they couldn't roll out of slumber in time.
"Damn you! You're cheating, I can smell it!" barked Inuyasha.
"Just face it, Inuyasha. I'm the better chess-player," said Miroku calmly, a smile playing on his lips.
Chess, unfortunately, was the only form of entertainment that evening, as Jaken had found out about their little teahouse escapade and banned Inuyasha and Miroku from leaving camp to go cavorting with women. They were setting a bad example, it seemed.
"Not when you win four times in a row, no," snapped Inuyasha. "I don't believe this. You can't beat me every time. Here, let's just play again…"
Outside the tent, two dark figures listened carefully.
Kaede had mentioned Inuyasha and Miroku had a wooden bathtub. Higuarshi Kei and Tanaka Kohaku were here to steal – no, borrow it.
"It's clear," whispered Sango. "They'll be too busy playing chess to notice us."
"Good," Kagome whispered back.
"You think we can risk it?"
"Right. So we sneak around the back of their tent…"
Lugging a large empty bathtub between them Sango and Kagome found themselves bumping their way towards the river. Which would make one wonder why they didn't just jump into the river themselves; but then again, keeping in mind they were both pampered young ladies…
"One thing good about the okiya…" shivered Kagome, "was that we had hot baths."
"Actually, cold baths are good for blood circulation," said Sango. "But I agree, nothing beats a hot steaming soak."
"You go first," Kagome said. "I'll keep a lookout." Just in case one of the men woke up (unlikely) and decided to take an evening piss in the river.
An hour later or so, they were shoving the tub back. Miroku and Inuyasha were still at the chess set. From what Kagome gathered from eavesdropping, Inuyasha had 'accidentally' overturned the board once, making them restart the game.
Placing the bathtub to its proper position behind the tent, Sango and Kagome crept silently back to their own tent.
They were just entering their tent when Kagome realized they were empty-handed between the two of them.
"Sango, did you bring the soap back?"
"What?" asked Sango, staring. "You didn't?"
Kagome groaned. "How stupid can we get? I'll go get it."
She crawled out and made her way back to the river. Sure enough their jar of soap stood on the grass, occasionally getting washed over by a splash of water. Making a grab for the jar, Kagome dried it off with her sleeve. Soap was a precious commodity – Kaede brought it to them every time she came, but it still was barely enough to cover their usage considering how filthy they always got. Besides, Kaede came only about once a week.
Someone landed conveniently in front of her. Kagome controlled herself before she could throw a high-pitched scream. The soap however, wasn't so lucky. It slipped from her hands, the glass shattering and pouring its precious contents out on the ground.
"Who are you?" demanded Kagome indignantly. Because of this person – she couldn't see who in the dark – she was missing a perfectly good jar of soap.
"Why do you care?" The answer was swift and crisp.
"Because you just ruined a perfectly good jar of soap! What, do you always sneak up on people?"
The person muttered something like, "Women…"
"Talking to me?" asked Kagome dangerously.
"I wouldn't dare." One could be a fool and still detect the sarcasm laced in his voice.
Kagome bit her lip. Damned if she didn't think of a good retort. "Good, and you'd better apologize for my soap!"
"Utter nonsense."
"Mister, I do live in the samurai camp not too far from here, and I won't hesitate to call on my buddies!" Kagome exclaimed bravely.
There was a short silence from the other end.
"I applaud you, Lady Higurashi," the man said at last. "You have the entire Japan searching for you, and yet you elude them by dressing as a man."
Kagome felt her throat constrict, threatening to strangle her. All of a sudden, she knew she recognized that voice.
Then again, no one had ever fooled the Lord of the Western Lands.
"Jaken-sama!" Kagome raced back to the camp, pretending to be out of breath. "Jaken-sama, Sesshoumaru-sama is here!"
The toad fell out of his tent, nightclothes flapping around him. "Higurashi! What's the meaning of this!"
Then he caught sight of his master, and all hell broke loose between Jaken screaming for the men to wake up and screaming at Inuyasha and Miroku.
"Chess? You play chess instead of staying alert and watching for intruders?" Jaken yelled.
"Like you were any better," shot back Inuyasha. "Snoring like a pig, and refusing to wake up."
"Yeah… in the future, Jaken, you do the guard duty shifts, ok?" asked Miroku, yawning.
Jaken's eyes bulged. "First, attend to the matters at hand!"
"Matters at hand?" Inuyasha repeated with false politeness
"Your brother. He doesn't like to be kept waiting!"
Yes, his brother. Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Why exactly do you think I'm taking my time?"
Miroku sighed. "Inuyasha, take pity on Jaken, the poor fellow. If Lord Sesshoumarus is kept waiting, Jaken's eyes will pop out with all their indignant bulging, and wouldn't that be a tragedy?"
"Right," said Inuyasha. To Jaken, he said, "I'm not interested in your well-being. But I don't want two yellow eyeballs on my floor, thank you very much for your offer though."
"Who saw Sesshoumaru anyways?" asked Inuyasha, torn between thanking and killing the bastard.
"One of the twigs," said Jaken.
"Twigs?" Miroku looked sceptical.
"What's his name… the one with same last name as you."
This caused Miroku to choke with laughter. "Kei? A twig?"
"Hey, poor Jaken doesn't know the difference between a twig and forest, so give him a rest," said Inuyasha.
"Save your breath, Inuyasha," advised Miroku. "It's a few hours after midnight, we've got your brother to tangle with, and the men to whip into proper formation. We don't need Jaken as another problem."
His brother looked immaculate as ever, and Inuyasha grudgingly straightened his crumpled red haori. "Someone's an early riser," he complained, casting dirty glares at Sesshoumaru.
Sesshoumaru looked contemptuous. "As you well know, I do not arrange my schedule around Jaken's silly ideas. If I come and it is before dawn, so be it," said Sesshoumaru blandly.
"Yeah… Sending word ahead would be nice," Inuyasha said.
Actually, it was amazing what Sesshoumaru let him get away with. Inuyasha couldn't think of anyone who disrespected his brother like he did. He took it as a sign of brotherly affection.
"I'll try and remember next time." Sesshoumaru took the cup of tea Jaken offered him, and discreetly emptied its contents out on the floor.
Inuyasha sighed. "You could at least act interested. Your toad did this whole recruit thing for you."
"But I am not interested. And to clarify, I don't own a toad. If you're talking about Jaken, I assure you his head will roll if he ever tries to do something for me again."
Inuyasha shifted on the spot. "Damn you, still as arrogant as ever. Tell me, does being a cold snob help diplomatic relations with other lords?"
A silver brow lifted. "Indeed, yes."
"You're insufferable," grumbled Inuyasha.
Sesshoumaru took no offence. "I hate to inform you, but so are you."
The small group watched the brothers with interest.
"Verbal sparring," sighed Miroku. "The sport I never tire of watching."
"I suppose you think you're an expert on the game," snorted Sango.
"Actually, I am," Miroku said shamelessly. "I have years of practice I can always put to good use."
"If you two don't shut up, they'll hear us and then we'll be in trouble for spying," warned Kagome. They were a distance away, but Kagome could swear Inuyasha was bright red.
"I'm hungry," Miroku was complaining.
"And your point?" asked Sango irritably.
"We should go ask Jaken to cook for us."
"He'd raise hell about 'mere recruits' asking for food, then he'd pack us off to cook for Sesshoumaru and him," reasoned Sango.
"True. Wait here, I'll go face down Jaken." With an air of one being forced to face a pack of hungry wolves, Miroku sauntered off.
Kagome noticed the somewhat dazed expression on her friend's face. "Sango!" she said in a low voice. "You're a boy now, remember?"
"I know," she said miserably.
"Hitting on the priest won't help our case at all."
"I know."
Kagome sighed. "If it makes you feel better, if we weren't in this position, I would love you as a sister-in-law."
"So I figured," smiled Sango.
Cooking, a la Jaken, a la Recruit Camp.
Jaken supervised closely, having ushered Miroku, Sango and Kagome from their eavesdrop session into the camp kitchen.
"You think Sesshoumaru's actually here to check on Jaken's progress? The whole time he's just been bickering with Inuyasha," mumbled Miroku with a wink at the girls. This would certainly get Jaken's back up.
"Oi! You done yapping? Get on with it!" ordered Jaken.
"Stop ordering me around, I'm helping you as a favour!" Miroku snapped. The knife he was using to slice vegetables with hovered in his hand, the sharp edge pointing towards Jaken.
"Oh, don't kill him. I hate burying toads," said Kagome, carefully slicing the daikon greens Jaken had handed her.
"Hey, Kago- Kei," Sango corrected, "people are going to eat these. There's no need to slice them so thinly."
"Hey, Kohaku," Kagome retorted sourly, "people are going to eat those. No need to make them choke." She eyed Sango's carrots, which were roughly chopped into carrot blocks.
"What's this anyways, vegetable water?" asked Miroku, dumping his cabbage into the pot Jaken was stirring.
"I wouldn't know," said Jaken darkly, furious at having to cook. At least he'd gotten the loafers to help.
"Where's the meat gone to?" Miroku glared at Jaken. "Are we supposed to eat this without meat?"
"Oh, but we get oat porridge every day," said Sango cynically.
"Here, you two delicate souls go and wait with Inuyasha," Kagome said, pushing Jaken and Miroku away from the hearth and out the kitchen tent. "We'll fix everything up nicely."
Dusting her hands off, she smiled mischievously at Sango.
"I was getting sick of oat porridge," grinned Sango.
"Well, we'll just have rice for a change," Kagome said, rummaging around for the rice sack.
"Sir," said Kagome, bowing cynically. "Your meal awaits you."
Sango stepped forward with decorum and placed a tray in front of Miroku.
"Thank you," he said, casting triumphant grins at Jaken. "I'm glad there are people who can make more than just vegetable soup."
Inuyasha's eyes and mouth watered. There was steaming fragrant rice and codfish grilled a nice deep brown. Even Jaken couldn't make food that good.
"Inuyasha, I know you are still a puppy, but no need to grovel," said Sesshoumaru. The hanyou sat up straight immediately.
"I didn't know you could cook," said Miroku, between mouthfuls, oblivious that everyone besides Sango and Kagome was watching him.
"Oh, our family owns a restaurant," Sango lied. "We're cousins."
Kagome tried not to go red under Sesshoumaru's penetrating stare. When she raised her eyes to meet his, he arched his eyebrow slowly, before turning and delivering a glare at Jaken.
"Stop fidgeting," he commanded. "Both of you – show me around."
Sango tugged on Kagome. "He means us," she whispered. "And stop staring at Inuyasha!"
"I wasn't," defended Kagome.
Sesshoumaru had already stepped outside, and they hurried after him. From far, far away, a crack of sunlight could be seen.
"Walk," Sesshoumaru commanded.
"You can drop that tone. I'm your equal, remember that," mumbled Kagome.
"Would you care to walk?"
"Sarcasm is not needed to make your point clear," said Kagome, brushing past him haughtily, Sango tailing in puzzlement.
"And have you located your brother?" Sesshoumaru asked, this being one of his more pressing matters at the moment.
"Yes," replied Kagome.
Sango looked confused.
"He caught me coming back from the river," explained Kagome sheepishly.
"First rule of disguise, never step out of costume," lectured Sesshoumaru. "Besides, you were making so much fuss about dropping that soap of yours it was otherwise impossible to believe you were a man."
"You dropped the soap?" exclaimed Sango. "Damn!"
"It wasn't my fault; blame him," said Kagome. "In response to you, Lord Sesshoumaru, my brother is right here. Miroku. Inuyasha's companion," Kagome told him.
He halted. Surely she had to know the future of Japan would shape according to her clan's actions. Yet she was here, disguised as a samurai recruit. "Why don't you tell your brother and clarify things for everyone? And while we're on the subject, you know women are not allowed as samurai."
"Spare me," sighed Kagome. "I know about samurai and their exclusive no-female rule."
Sesshoumaru ignored her. "Right now, the other lords consider your clan officially inactive because of your stepmother being in control. Naraku wants o form an alliance with Higurashi or Taisho, and since your clan is 'inactive', he has little choice but to ask me."
"Sounds like you want me to get Naraku off your back," said Kagome saucily. "The great Lord of the Western Lands?"
"You may be my equal, but I am older than you. A certain degree of respect is warranted," he reminded her icily.
She gulped, and tried to take things seriously. "From what I gather, Houjou, Kouga and Naraku want the throne, but both will never stand a chance without your help or my help… They'd make pitiful emperors," scoffed Kagome.
"Exactly. The main concern is to eliminate Naraku. Afterward, if you announce the Higurashi's intention to claim the throne, Houjou and Kouga will back down immediately."
"So you want my help getting rid of the shogun?" asked Kagome, grinning.
For a woman, Kagome Higurashi was decidedly arrogant. Sesshoumaru would have none of it. "I can easily bring Naraku to his knees, but as a major clan it will be in the Higurashi's interests to help out."
"And what's in this for you?"
"Stopping Naraku from being emperor is good for everyone. He'll tear down the rules and cause terror in the people."
Unbelievable. This man had no sense of humour. Kagome put on a huge sigh. "I wish I could help, I really do. But in reality, I cannot. To the court, I am no longer Higurashi Kagome. I'm some famous geisha. Everyone wants to make acquaintances with me to be seen as powerful and rich, but no one will respect me."
Sesshoumaru wasn't going to let her off the hook so easily. "That's where your brother comes in."
"I didn't even know I had a brother until I met Kagura! And then I still had to force the truth out of my old nurse!" Kagome looked at the ground. "No one will ever believe it. Because I wouldn't have…"
"If not for your Higurashi mark."
"Yes! Exactly!" Wait, how did he know about -
"So you'll live out your life a man?" challenged Sesshoumaru. "Because the moment you stop wearing your hair in a topknot and get rid of your ninja mask, someone will turn you in for a hefty sum to your okiya, where I trust you'll never see the light of day again. Unless you never want to regain your former titles, the only way to do so is to kick your stepmother out."
"And what exactly is wrong with living out my life as a man?" Kagome retorted. "I'll have more rights than I ever had before!"
"Just think it over," he said carelessly, walking away from her.
Obstinate child. Sesshoumaru knew exactly why most lords refused to listen to their wives and daughters. As though Kagome Higurashi really believed she made a convincing man. It was only by chance that the likes of Jaken and Inuyasha were too stupid to notice, but the rest of Japan was hardly blind.
"Why do we keep waiting?" demanded Juromaru.
"Because I say so!" barked Naraku.
They spied on the recruit camp from a distance, waiting to attack just as Kanna had said.
"Boring…" muttered Kagemaru. "We're here to attack helpless recruits with no experience in fighting."
"One false move, we could all be dead," hissed Naraku.
"We've been hiding out here for almost three hours!" exclaimed Juromaru.
"How dangerous could little boys be?" asked Kagemaru.
"Are you sure Kanna made the right prediction?" Juromaru wanted to know.
"She's never wrong," said Naraku calmly. "Stop jabbering. When I become emperor you two will be handsomely rewarded for helping me."
"I still don't get what attacking a tiny camp like this does…" sighed Juromaru. The last he heard it hadn't been Lord Sesshoumaru's iniative. He doubted the lord would care if they massacred his little toad servant and some human men.
"Having second thoughts?" asked Naraku dangerously.
"No, of course not, my lord, I-"
Naraku grinned harshly. "Die."
And he stabbed Juromaru in the gut, watching the blood spill onto the ground with pleasure.
"Miroku, when you're done stuffing your face," growled Inuyasha. The priest was eating like they'd haven't eating in days.
"Jealous?" asked Miroku. "I'm sure there's more in the kitchen, help yourself."
"Damned houshi," grumbled Inuyasha, making his way to the kitchen tent.
The sun was rising. Inuyasha watched the sun creep up and sighed, slowly inhaling the fresh scent daylight brought with it.
His eyes darted to the right immediately.
Was he going crazy or did he smell blood?