A/N: I'm glad that you guys are enjoying this silly fic. Thank you thank you thank you guys all so much. I just have to say I love my readers. You guys always make my day. I guess that what keeps me from actually working at work, andinstead I'm writing fics. :P

Anyways since this installation is for "38Minutes", I'm going to shameless promote an older fic I wrote about what Sheppard might have wanted to say to Weir in the episode. And of course being me it is Sheppard and Weir.And since won't let me post the link up here. You can access it through my profile titled "An Honor to Serve". Thanks again!

38 Minutes

Aiden Ford

Entry 9
Finally! An episode where I have more lines! Oh forgot, Major Sheppard's screwed; he has a vampire bug sucking the life out of him. Now I'm definitely the prettiest. That bug is butt ugly!

Entry 10
Crap, they should have left me dematerialized in the event horizon. Now we are all screwed.

Entry 11
Did Teyla say that's a wraith bug? Gross! I am definitely prettier than that bug. I should stop throwing stuff at Teyla, she looks like she's going eat me.

Entry 12
Everyone has something important to do. Rodney is figuring out…stuff. Teyla's staring longingly at the Major. The Major is…suffering. I'll just stand here and look worried and pretty.

Entry 13
Wow, never realized we had so much crap in your vests. It's like a Mary Poppins vest. All we're missing is a can of Raid. Ooo chocolate…

Entry 14
Iodine, alcohol, salt, water…Aside from the Major screaming in pain and throwing me across the backcompartment. I feel like I'm cooking. Now I'm hungry and McKay just took my chocolate bar. Bastard. And I think I bumped my head on one of the chairs.

Entry 15
Crap, I killed the Major…I'm screwed.

Entry 16
Gross! The wraith bug is wrapped in my jacket and its guts are all over the jumper chairs. Ick! Wonder who's job is it to clean that up?

Entry 17
Ow…I was running for the event horizon and hit the bulkhead doors instead. Crap, now I have to open the rear hatch.

Entry 18
We're alive, obviously. I'm glad my jacket got blown out of the ship. Now I can have a new pretty one. :grins:

Rodney McKay

Entry 14
As mean as this sounds…Sheppard is getting hickey from a bug! Hahahaha.

Entry 15
Ouch! The next time we decide to get stuck in a stargate I want to be sitting down with my seat belt fastened. What a minute…that's the event horizon…We are stuck in the stargate…Crap, I'm a dead man.

Entry 16
35 minutes…I will not overreact. I will not overreact. I will…for crying out loud! Ford needs to get to the point already. Just tell Elizabeth, wraith base gone. Wraith attack. Sheppard injured. We stuck. We have problem. Oh dear 34 minutes…I'm a dead man.

Entry 17
27 minutes…Closed bulkhead doors with minute hope of surviving after the gate shuts down and we slowly drift off and become space junk…no thanks to the Atlantis staff:shakes fist: I'm a dead man.

Entry 18
25 minutes…the wraith evolved from giant bugs…yeah…We'll worry about that if we survive. I think I'm getting cross-eyed from looking at these glowing glass panels. :crosses eyes: I can see my nose!

Entry 19
19 minutes…I'm hungry…I'm a dead man, and my last meal is a chocolate bar. My dreams have indeed been fulfilled.

Entry 20
15 minutes…we've slid in further…Did I mention I'm a dead man?

Entry 21
7 minutes…Sheppard decided to die first…no pressure…I'm so dead.

Entry 22
The drive pods retracted! We aren't moving…2 minutes…I'm a dead man.

Entry 23
We're on the other side! We're alive! Well except for Sheppard...oh wait never mind, Beckett revived him. We're alive!

John Sheppard

Entry 18
I have a giant bug around my neck giving me a hickey. I am NOT a happy camper. Where is the can of Raid when you need it?

Entry 19
I have a giant bug around my neck and just hit my head on the jumper ramp again…What happen to 'Fragile: handle with care!' Are they trying to kill me? Ow…I'm going to pass out now.

Entry 20
Why are we not in Atlantis yet? I see the event horizon…I'm beyond screwed. :headwall:

Entry 21

If I weren't incapacitated, I would kick the crap out of McKay so he would shut up. My head and neck still hurt.

Entry 22
Now Teyla tells me it's a wraith bug. How much more screwed can a man get? We're only 19 minutes into the episode…crap. I'm SO beyond screwed.

Entry 23
Still screwed and still in pain. :headwall repeatedly:

Entry 24
The damn bug is finally off me…but one problem…I'm DEAD!

Entry 25
I lied. I'm still alive, but starving. Doctor Weir refuses to give me food until I tell her what I was going to say. The woman is evil!

Teyla Emmagan

Entry 10
Oh no! Major Sheppard is injured now is my chance to nurse him back to…OUCH! Who is driving? Things are falling on my head. OUCH! If Lieutenant Ford throws another gauze strip at me I'm going to kick his ass.

Entry 11
If this wraith bug doesn't let go of Major Sheppard soon, I'm going to kick its ass too!

Entry 12
Did Lieutenant Ford say 'cut his shirt off'?' I thought he'd never ask. :grins:

Entry 13
Major Sheppard can't die! I love him:sobs: Oh yeah, I have to drag the Major through the event horizon.

Entry 14
We are all still alive! I will wear my rainbow disco outfit to visit Major Sheppard in the infirmary.

Elizabeth Weir

Entry 16
This is the first episode I don't have to wear our Galaxy Quest uniforms! Yay! Instead, I look like I stepped out of the starship Enterprise…I really need to find the Atlantis Laundromat.

Entry 17
How the hell they Sheppard get a bug attached to him? He couldn't have been stupid and just walk into it…wait that is exactly what he did. :facepalm:

Entry 18
The puddlejumper is stuck in the Stargate! And now Rodney tells me there is a 38-minute time limit? Where was that vital information when I was being briefed to run the Stargate program? That's right the SGC didn't have problems of spaceships getting stuck in a Stargate, they didn't have any puddlejumpers to get stuck with:headdesk:

Entry 19
What is it with the Athosians and wanting to prepare for death? Damn! Just wasted a minute arguing with mountain man. Must find a place to keep dirty little people from bothering me. I think I need coffee…Damn! No time. Arrggh!

Entry 20
I should have kicked Kavanaugh in the balls and push him off the balcony. I can still do it. I am the Governor of the Colony. Kavanaugh is SO on the List. :evil grin:

Entry 21
I am going to kick Lieutenant Ford for interrupting John. I want to know what he was going to say! Now I'll never know:headdesk:

Entry 22
I work with lunatics! Tell me, how is killing oneself to remove a bug a good idea?

Entry 23
I'm going to have to kick John's ass for making me worry again. Unless he tells me what he was going to say…maybe then I'll be nice. I have to kick a lot of asses today…better get started. :devil grin:

Entry 24
Sheppard still wont' tell me what he was going to say. He is SO going to get it.

Carson Beckett

Entry 9
Crap, how do you diagnose something you're never seen or heard of? On the bright side, I don't have to be near the bug. Poor Major Sheppard, he will be sorely missed. OUCH! Doctor Weir just pinched me for being negative.

Kavanaugh

Entry 1
Weir just cut my nuts off! I mean…metaphorically…don't let the long hair and bitchy attitude throw you off. Weir just threaten to send me to my own planet…with my ego…maybe I should take the offer. King Kavanaugh…ooo alliteration.

Radek Zelenka

Entry 1
Yippee! My first appearance! And I told Doctor Weir to shut up…but I did say 'please' and remembered to smile nicely. :smiles: