Chapter Eleven: five years earlier

Draco's façade crumbled as Hermione carefully touched his cheek and he felt his lip tremble once more. In an effort to restrain his emotions he grabbed her hands fiercely in his own and squeezed them tightly until he had released one good deep breath. "I don't know how to tell you," he said as he searched her eyes for the strength he needed.

Hermione pulled him back to the table and sat with him in chairs side-by-side. "Start with your mother," she coaxed him gently. "You loved her very much."

Draco nodded his agreement. "She was everything to me, especially when I couldn't be anything to my father," he said. "She used to tell me stories when I was little. And she used to comfort me after each session with my father. We would take long walks on the property and chase butterflies in the summer." He broke while sifting through his memories.

"There was one time I remember when she took me with her to Diagon Alley." He grinned. "I was so young and everything was so exciting. She made me tow the line while she got her supplies, but she rewarded me with ice cream when we were done." Hermione watched as his face relaxed in remembrance. "As we walked around after that we stopped in front of the quidditch supply store. There was a beautiful broom on display in the window and I remember telling her that one day I was going to be a famous quidditch player." Hermione smiled as she pictured Draco as a young boy. "Mother just laughed and said that we'd see. I remember she ruffled my hair and told me that she'd love me no matter what I grew up to be." Here Draco choked on an oath. "I guess she never figured on me becoming a Death Eater."

"But you're not," Hermione admonished him quickly. "Draco, don't think of yourself that way. You're not one of them and your mother must have known…must have seen that what was happening was the work of your father alone." Draco closed his eyes and focused on the comfort of her words. It was an amazing feeling to have someone believe in you so. "Draco?" Hermione broke into his thoughts. He opened his eyes once more. "Can you tell me what happened to her?" she asked gently.

"It was only a few months ago, but already it seems like another lifetime." Draco felt Hermione squeeze his hand again. "My father and I had had a fairly nasty discussion over dinner that night. The Dark Lord was ready for his newest crop of recruits and I was to be one of them before the end of the week." A tremor shook Draco's frame as he remembered. "My mother tried a handful of times to change the subject, but Father told her to keep silent. I had never known her to go against his wishes or to stand up to him, so I knew there was little hope of changing the outcome of my fate."

Draco stood to pace again. "He said that our Lord was close to full strength and power once more. He said that together as father and son in our Lord's ranks we would achieve greater glory than I could ever imagine. His eyes seemed to glaze over as he spoke of the honor of service to our Lord. He reveled in the details he shared with me about rape and murder, power and destiny." Draco stilled his steps as he shook his head. "I was disgusted. My father, who had always been so proud and so mighty was reveling in filthy and cowardly acts. I couldn't understand at first what had changed. And then I knew," he said. "My father had been brainwashed just like he had been brainwashing me." He began to pace again, this time more frantically. "I listened to him talk about the honor of our family name and the pride of serving our Lord in his cleansing of our world, and I noticed that his eyes weren't the only strange thing. Whenever he talked about the battle that is still to come his voice would take on an otherworldly quality. And this time he was actually foaming a bit at the mouth. I was disgusted with what I was hearing and shocked at what I was seeing." He stopped once more. "And I made the mistake of saying so."

Draco sat once more next to Hermione but did not look at her. "He came out of the trance-like state he seemed to be in and cursed me with a full body bind. I didn't even have time to react. I felt myself slam into the wall of the dining room and the next thing I remember is waking up in the dungeon. And then he set out to break me." Draco looked at Hermione. "Are you sure we want me to go on?" he asked. At Hermione's nod he took a breath and continued, this time keeping his eyes on her own. "He used Crucio on me until I could no longer stand. It felt as though my body was ripping apart at the seams but I never cried out, not once. That would have only made it worse. And then he pulled out his favorite torture toys and proceeded to 'teach me some respect' for our Lord."

Draco hesitated before he pulled up his pant leg to reveal a large, deep scar. Hermione felt her heart break as she looked at mark on his otherwise pale skin. "I have others to match," he whispered as he tried to gauge her reaction. When she looked questioningly back to his eyes he merely uttered, "Back. Chest. Upper Arms."

Hermione felt tears well as she dropped to the floor at his feet. Gingerly she touched the scar on his leg and nodded in understanding as she replied. "She tried to stop him, didn't she?"

"I don't remember much about what happened once she came in. I'd been beaten so severely I could barely retain consciousness. I have impressions of yelling, fighting. I knew Mother was trying to get to me, trying to keep him away." He closed his eyes against his own fearful memory. "And then there was a flash of green light. And she was still…so still." Hermione emitted a small cry and watched as Draco gave himself over to the shivers that engulfed him. Jumping from her position on the floor, she wrapped her arms around him and held him as he shook. "He told everyone she committed suicide but it wasn't true!" He broke on a sob. "It wasn't true!"

"Shhh," was all she could murmur as she rocked him gently to and fro. "Shhh," she continued to croon as she cradled his head against her heart. "I'm here now, Draco. I'm here."

"Don't leave me, Hermione," she heard him beg as he clung to her and it ripped at her heart.

"I wont, Draco," she promised him. "I'll stay. I'll stay. I'll stay…"