More Than Words Can Say
Disclaimer- I own NOTHING! Expect the kids… they are mine… but not in real life! But I want Draco… WAND!
Summary- Only bad news can come of the severe car accident that involved Hermione. Draco is struggling with the death of his wife, being a single parent to the 5-year-old twins, Caylie and Michael, and just life in general. Sequel to 'Two People Fell in Love'.
Note- This story is in Draco's point of view!
Note 2- ok… I had to like triple-check this story cuz I wrote this before I wrote 'I Really Did Love You So' lol! I don't know why tho!
Thanks from the help of- Andy Griggs (If Heaven), Alan Jackson (Monday Morning Church), Alias (More Than Words Can Say), Tim McGraw (Don't Take the Girl), Freya (me) (I'll Be) and Steve Warner (Holes in the Floor of Heaven)
Another note- Draco doesn't say the word 'Hermione' in the story… he says 'her' or 'she'. I just added that cuz I just looked over it and I go confused myself… so I was letting you know that! But he does say it in the flashbacks… so yea…
Now on to the story!
Chaper 1- Don't Take the Girl
They were five… FIVE! For crying out loud, they knew her for FIVE YEARS! But what about me? I've known her since I was 11, and, oh, how I regret treating her like shit! If I knew this was gonna happen, I would of NEVER called her 'Mudblood', NEVER do anything to hurt her, NEVER do anything to make her cry, NEVER! Is God now punishing me for this? Just because I regret it now… now more than ever, doesn't mean that he had to take her! WHY THE HELL DID HE TAKE HER FROM ME! She was everything to me, my world, my love… my life. And now…this…
I feel as though I could have stopped her. Why did I let her go? It was raining so fricking hard and I told her not to go, but she has a way of convincing people to do what she wants. But still, why did I give in?
FlashBack- (this IS NOT IN DRACO'S POV)
"Yuck, it has been like this all day!" Draco said looking out the window. It was all downpour rain.
"Daddy," Michael said standing beside his father, "when the rain stops can Caylie and I go out and jump around in the puddles?"
"Absolutely not!" Hermione said, grabbing her coat.
"Mi, he was talking to me!" Draco smiled.
"I don't care, I said no!"
"Mommy," the voice of Caylie came, who was playing on the floor with her Barbies, "where are you going?"
"Mommy has to go to work to pick something up. I will be back in about twenty minutes," Hermione told her daughter.
"Mi, are you crazy?" Draco said surprisingly. Michael and Caylie giggled. "You can't go out there, in this weather?"
"Don't be silly, Dray," she said kissing him, "I'll only be gone for twenty minutes, chill out." She hugged the kids, opened the door, waved goodbye to her family and walked out.
(Half and Hour Later…)
'Something's not right…' Draco thought to himself.
It was raining harder than ever. It would have been a miracle if you could see the other side of the street. It was now 8:00pm and she wasn't home… where the hell is she?
'Something is definitely not right.' He thought again.
"Daddy?" Caylie said walking in the living room with her blanket and stuffed kitten, "Where's Mommy?"
"I'm not sure, sweetie," he said softly taking the child into his arms and rocking her. He saw a tear escape her eye. "I'm going to call the Johnson's to see if they will come over to watch you."
"Why?" her small voice whispered.
"Don't ask questions now," he said as her got up and called the neighbors.
"Hello?" a voice on the other line said.
"Katlyn? It's Draco," he said quickly. "Hermione had to run to her work, and this was half an hour ago and she's not home yet. Do you mind coming over, I'm gonna go look for her."
"No, not at all," Katlyn replied.
Two minutes later, Katlyn was at the door.
"Thank you so much," Draco said, quickly, "Caylie is on the couch, but I'm not sure if she is asleep, but just calm her down, and Michael should be in bed."
"Okay, you just go, don't worry about us here," Katlyn said.
Draco ran to his car, soaked from head to toe, and drove to Hermione's work. It turns out there was a traffic jam halfway.
"Damn!" Draco cursed to himself. He parked his car on the side of the road and just started running. Running and running, until he saw why the traffic was being held up. A car and a semi had collided and the police and an ambulance were there, trying to get the drivers out of their cars. But the car, the car, it was so familiar, why was it so familiar? Draco was now running up to the car and read the licenses plate…
DCM-919"No…" Draco whispered to himself.
"Sir, you are going to have to back away," a policeman said to him.
He stood there, frozen.
"Sir?" the policeman said.
"Mister, that is my wife's car," Draco shouted at the man. At that, he ran up the to car and saw that Hermione had been removed from the damaged vehicle. "WHERE THE HELL IS SHE!" he yelled at the man.
The policeman pointed to a stretcher, and Draco knew… he knew something was seriously wrong.
Draco slowly ran up to the stretcher. A sheet covered a body. The sheet was covered in blood.
"Excuse me sir," one to the medics said to him, "please go back behind the yellow line."
"Jerry!" the policeman called out, "Let him be!" The medic walked away.
Draco slowly pulled back the sheet…
"Oh, God… no," he breathed.
He saw the sight he never wanted to see.
There she laid, deep cuts on her face, blood running from the cuts. Her face, her knew her face so well, but she was a different person with the cuts and bruises, but he knew it was really her. A tear escaped his eye.
"Hermione?" he whispered, "Hermione please, wake up. Mi, please."
"Draco?" a weak voice came.
"Hermione, what…"
"Draco, I can't do this," her voice was so weak, she spoke in a whisper.
"No, Mi, don't talk like that," he said, kneeling so he was face to face with her. He found her hand and held it tight. She squeezed his hand back "You can do this."
"No, Draco, I can't, look at me."
"Mi, hang in there, you can't go. I won't let you."
"Draco, please, you have to understand. There is no way I can make it."
"Hermione Malfoy, you will make it! Look at me and say that you will make it."
"No… Draco, I can't."
"What about Harry, Ron and Ginny, they need their best friend. Don't they matter? What about Caylie and Michael? They need their mother. Don't they matter?"
"Draco, please…"
"What about me? I need you. Don't… don't I matter?" Tears were running down his face like crazy. Hermione had tears in her eyes too.
"Draco, I love you more than life itself, and you know that. I could of lived not knowing Harry, Ron and Ginny, and possibly Michael and Caylie, but not you. I would still be like this if I didn't know you. You made my life a living hell for me the first couple years we've known each other…"
"Will you not bring that up now?"
"But you saw a side to me that you really cared about, and I saw you differently and I loved you for every breath I took. I love you forever and always. I can't hold on much longer, I have to go."
"Mi, Hermione, no, no, please, you can't," he cried, "You can't go and leave me, not like this."
"Draco, I must." Her voice grew weaker. "I love you… goodbye."
Her hand went limp and she never said another word.
"No, Hermione, no," he cried into the stretcher mattress. "God, please don't take her, please, oh, please don't take her, God. Don't take her. Please."
(Tim- Don't Take The Girl)
END FLASHBACK-(Back to draco's pov)I hate reliving that, of all the memories that have totally fucked up my life, that is the worst.
It was only a month ago, and I still wait for her to come though the door, with her beautiful smile, open arms for the kids that welcomed her home, and my hello kiss. I can't sleep at night anymore, because all I can picture is how dreadful that collision could have been for her. And then the part where she… where she… you know, left. It's always 6:00am when I just stare out the window and I'm thinking that I need her now.
(More Than Words Can Say)
I cry when I know I will never see her wonderful face again, or hear her beautiful voice. I just wanna take myself out of this world. I don't know how, thought, but I can't live on with her not here. I have Caylie and Michael for me. But they could NEVER replace her though. No one can replace her. I had such a hard time facing Caylie after that, because she looks so much like her. I can barely stand being around Caylie too, because I can hear her voice. It haunts me.
I couldn't talk to Harry or the Weasley family, or anyone in that case. I can't face her parents, either. At the funeral, I was in my own box. I stayed away from everyone and everything in sight. I was so quiet; I didn't realize I, myself, was there. Whenever I saw Harry or Ron, I didn't say a word, I couldn't have said a word even if I wanted to. My mother came to the funeral… and that still is strange to me… my mother hated her. I asked her why she was there and she didn't even answer me. She gave me a hug, walked to her coffin and set a red rose on it and walked back out. Not one word was said out of her. When I got home that day, I laid on our bed, crying. Sobbing, it was more like. Whenever one of us was upset, we would snuggle together, and tell each other what was wrong. She always had my shoulder to cry on, and vise versa. Now what do I have? A pillow? My hands? No, it would never compare to the comfort that she gave me. Nothing ever would.
(A/N- Question… Why is the word 'fun' in the word 'funeral'? Is that a trick question? Hmmm… ok I'm ruining the moment! My bad!)
Everywhere I look, I see flashes of us; at her piano, I saw her playing her songs she was so famous for; her guitar, which she taught me how to play; the couch, where we would watch TV, or snuggle; the porch, where she sat, reading, as I played with the twins; the backyard, where we would have our Sunday cookout every week, after church, when it was nice out, (and her last one was the day before my life left me, and we would have one yesterday, but it's not the same without her); the twins' bedrooms, where I watched her tuck them in goodnight; our bed, where we… well I won't go there, but she was everywhere, everywhere I turned, she was there. And you know how some people ask me if I can feel her, and say 'yes', why do they make it be a good thing? She's not there. She is haunting me. And how can people look at that like it is a good thing?
Maybe she left her spirit… For the kids? For anyone who misses her? For me?
But why? That is my only question. WHY did God have to take her? WHY did she leave me like this? WHY did I let her go? WHY did she have to go? WHY is it that is can't accept the fact that she is gone? WHY can't I talk to God without getting pissed off at him, knowing that he took her away from me? Why?
I can't even go to church anymore, I can't go without her dragging my butt there. The preacher of the church stopped by when he found out the news, and he told me she was in a better place. He told me that heaven was like twilight, when the fireflies start their dancing on the lawn, or that heaven was like cherry pie, so cool and sweet and heavy on the tongue and just one bite will satisfy your hunger. Well, if heaven is like that, then I'm not afraid to die.
I still wish she was here with me. I knew I could have prevented her death. But the preacher is right; she is a better place. From what I heard in church, heaven is a beautiful place, a place perfect for her; a place I wish I could see her in.
I got up from the bed and walked to the dresser. I noticed that her Bible was on it. I put it away. Like I said, I can't talk to God without yelling at him, and that was what the Bible made me think of. Things are only getting worse. I walked into her studio, which was where she kept her guitars, the piano, and all her other music stuff. I can hear her singing there. Oh, how I missed her voice. I picked up one to the guitars and played a few cords.
(Alan- Monday Morning Church)
I played the last cords, and then cried.
It took me about 10 minutes for me to stop, but I got control of myself.
I haven't seen Caylie or Michael for about 3 weeks. They are at their grandparents' house, on her side. They decided to take them for a while; I guess it was so I could clear my head. After it happened, I just shut them out of my life. I now realized that they are all I have left. I now feel so stupid for that.
That's it!
I got in my car and I drove to the Granger's. I rang the doorbell and her mother answered the door.
"Draco," she greeted me. She pulled me into a hug. "How are you doing? Are you feeling okay? Come on in."
"A bit," I answered, as I walked in the house. "How have Caylie and Michael been?"
"They are great, but they really need their father," she said, leading me into the living room. "I'll go get them." She left the room.
I walked over to the mantle. There were two pictures of her and me at our wedding, the best day of my life. The first one was in front of the church garden; she stood with me, in her gorgeous white bride's dress, and her smile across her face. 'Wow, she is so beautiful,' I thought. The second picture showed us, kissing at the reception. I remember that kiss; Harry and Ron shouted 'slip her the tongue' and well, with a request like that (for me) it's not to forget those kinds of kisses. 'The camera went off at the perfect moment.' I wiped a tear from his eye. 'Damn I miss her.'
"DADDY!"
I turned and saw Caylie run toward me. I welcomed her with open arms and she gave me the biggest hug her little arms came give. Michael came up to us and joined in on the hug.
"Daddy, are we going home?" Michael asked me. Caylie looked at me, reminding me how much she looked like her. I nodded.
"If you want," I told them. They nodded. I noticed that Caylie had a bit of sadness in her eyes. Caylie had her eyes, and I hated seeing her like that. When I did, I pulled her into a hug and we worked everything out. I did the same for Caylie, I pulled her into a hug, and kissed her forehead. "It's ok, things will be different, but it will be ok," I said. 'How can I do this?' I thought still holding my children, 'How can I do this alone?'
Her mother got their stuff packed and I drove them home. When I walked inside, I swear I saw her reading in her favorite chair, I swear I saw her get up and greet the kids, I swear she walked to me and give me my hello kiss. I swear… it was really her.
I reached my hand out to touch her cheek, but then, she vanished. My fucking mind is playing those damn tricks on me. It's been doing that since it happened.
"Daddy?" Caylie said, which shook me out of my daydream, "What's going to happen now?"
I took a deep breath, sighed and sat on the couch.
"I don't know," I answered, "I just don't know."
She came up to me, sat on my lap, and laid her head on my chest. I hugged her.
"Daddy?" Michael's voice came.
"Hm?"
"I don't want you to do that again, okay?"
"Do what?"
"Leave us," Caylie said softly.
"I won't ever leave you, why would I do that?"
"Because when Mommy died, you acted like you didn't want us anymore."
"We thought that was why you sent us away," Michael explained.
"We thought you didn't love us anymore," Caylie said.
"Cay, Mike, I love you two with all my heart," I told them, "You are all I have left. I just had to figure out my life and what to do next. I promise, will never send you away like that again."
I pulled them both into a hug and we just sat in silence, on the couch, just holding one another.
I looked up and saw her. She was smiling. I missed her smile so much. Then she spoke…
(Andy- If Heaven)
I nodded and again, she vanished.
That night, Caylie came into my bedroom and told me she had a nightmare. While I was calming her down, she fell asleep. I decided not to carry her back to her back to her own bed so I let her stay.
I couldn't sleep, so I got up and walked to the dresser where I put her Bible away. I opened it and found a passage…
A capable wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
(Proverbs 31:10-12)
Her children rise up and call her happy; her husband too, and he praises her:
"Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all."
(Proverbs 31:28-29)
The verses are right, the heart of me did trust in her. She did do good and no harm to me. I was the one that caused her harm. She never hurt in me in any way (and back in third year didn't count), but she also wasn't the type of girl to do that, either. No, that was me; I was the bad one. But, she changed me. She made a whole new person out of me. It was like I fell apart and she put me back together. And the other verse was true too. Caylie and Michael were always happy to see her, and I did praise her. I praised her like an angel; she was an angel.
6:00am had rolled around. I stared out of my widow, like I do every morning, remembering all the fun times we had.
"Daddy?" Caylie said from the bed, "Where are you?"
"Right here," I answered, going up to her.
She smiled at me. I smiled back. That was the first time I had smiled since it happened.
Later on that day, Caylie and Michael were invited to go to a friend's house. While they were gone, I took her Bible and went to the cemetery. I found her grave.
Hermione Ann Granger Malfoy
September 19th, 1987- July 20th, 2019
(A/N- I think I did the equation right… but you people don't care about the equation do you? I know Brynn don't care about the equation! All you care about is the story… so continue!)
I laid down next to the grave. I really just can't let her go. I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't.
I know that half you are out there getting all mad at me cuz I just killed off Hermione… sorry, but this story needed some drama! And with Draco… talk about the faith! Wow! But who cares! Anyway… PLEASE review! Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please, Please review! Okay, too may pleases, but you get it! I already have the next chapter written but you have to review this one before post the next one, cuz I'm just mean! Ok? Ok!
Freya/dracosbaby07