A/N: This chapter is dedicated to tweeny-weeny, because she is totally awesome because not only did she write the bad fanfic featured in this chapter, but she even rewrote it for me when I asked her to add something in. So mad props to her. Anyways, this chapter isn't that great and not reall that funny, it's really story driven trying to get our four out of the room of bad fics. Anyways, hope y'all enjoy.

"We are four educated wizards here, there is no reason why we can't devise a plan to get out of here. With proper planning and execution we shouldn't be here for more than a few days." Hermione said smugly.

"Well, there's only one problem with that Hermione. WE HAVE NO PLAN, WE'RE GOING TO BE STUCK IN HERE FOR THE REST OF OUR NATURAL BORN LIVES, AND VOLDERMORT'S GOING TO TRY TO DO SOMETHING NASTY WITH ME." Ron boomed as he grabbed Hermione by the shoulders and shook her.

"Do be more quiet Ron, we don't want Voldermort to know that we're plotting against him, now do we? Now what we need is a diversion. Something big to take Voldermort's mind off of us, and onto something far away so that we can have a good look around this room, and the ceiling to see if there is some kind of escape route." Hermione said

"Well that's all well and good Hermione, but...uhh how can we cause a diversion. Seriously how can we when Harry doesn't even love me like he's supposed to?" Ginny cried with a wail as she burst into tears, flung herself on the ground and started moaning wildly.

"Did I mention that I still really need to pee? If I could just get out of here and use the bathroom." Harry cried sadly.

"THAT'S IT HARRY! IF ONLY WE COULD GET OUT OF HERE!" Hermione exclaimed.

"Well that was the general idea Hermione..duhh." Harry said sarcastically.

"No! I have a plan, but would he fall for it? Where would they go, would he agree to it?"

Hermione started mumbling to herself frantically and pacing back and forth.

"I guess we'll just sit here and wait until she decides to tell us about her plan." Ron said with a smirk, as the three others sat down and watched Hermione slowly make a trench in the hard ground from her frantic pacing.

Six hours later.

"Surprise bitches! I'm like totally back, and totally upset because I just spilled salamander blood all over my new Malono Blahnicks. I'm like so freaking pissed! How will Ron Weasley ever fall in love with me if my shoes are covered in lizard blood? Seriously, how will he?" Voldie questioned wildly as a he began to throw a tantrum upstairs much to the horror of the four wizards below.

This is when inspiration finally hit Hermione, this was her chance.

"Oh, Voldie, you are likez such a good evil wizard, how can Ron not already love you? I mean, you're so powerful! And you have like really good fashion sense!" Hermione said with a high pitched squeak.

"Why thank you Mudblood, that's like so sweet of you." Voldie said, clearly flattered.

"You know what you and Ron need? How about a romantic get-away? Just the two of you? Doesn't that sound just dreamy." Hermione asked neverously.

"What! What are you trying to do Hermione, get me molested?" Ron screamed wildly.

"Well, of course I am Ron, I mean it is so very obvious to me that you and Voldie belong together. Clearly you and me were just never meant to be. Trust me you'll learn to love Voldie, and don't worry the rest of us won't get too lonely while the two of you are gone." Hermione said with a wink in Ron's direction.

"Oh! OOOhh! Yes that does sound quite nice, just you and me Voldie." Ron said finally catching on, but still completely disgusted with the thought of having to spend "romantic" time with Voldermort.

"Like yay! Just me and my lover! Okay Ron, like you and me are like totally out of here let me just pack my suitcase...now where did I put my new thongs, and my leather whip?" Voldermort could be heard asking himself as Ron's eyes grew as wide as saucers.

"Oh God, you better hope this works Hermione, are I will Avada Kedarva you, just so I can bring you back to life, and do it all over again. I swear" Ron said with a harsh whisper.

"Like I'm totally ready honey cakes! Let's like go to Hawaii or somethin'. And don't worry you three, I'll take good care of Ronniekins! And I even have some entertainment planned for our absense! Here is one of my favorite bad fics with my favorite Mary-Sue. Aurora Gabriella
Goldilocks Sunshine Granger! She is a dear, dear imaginary friend of mine. Well like, byes bitches!" Voldie shouted gleefully, and with a loud pop and a frantic look in his eyes Ron suddenly dissappeared from the room, and silence came from above. Oh and the dread Mac flashed with some more bad fanfiction of course.

"I hope this works Hermione, if not my brother is in for some much unneeded molestation by an evil gaylord." Ginny said with a shudder, as Hermione began to look around the room for clues to an escape.

"Look, let's face it I'm the smartest person here, I mean you two haven't even read Hogwarts: A History, so I'll start the investegations, while you two start reading the fanfiction to keep Voldermort happy." Hermione said with a satisfied smirk on her bushy hair...I mean face. Whatever.

"Uhh...okay Hermione whatever you say." Harry said as him and Ginny sat down at the Mac, and Hermione began inspecting the walls.

"I guess I'll read, since you've got that scar and all Harry." Ginny said as she reached for the mouse, and Harry's hand grabbed her's mid reach, and put her hand in his, and held it that way.

"Uhh...so back to the fanfiction." Ginny said with a large blush, as she began to read.

"Like Hermininy totalllie has like a totallie hawt sister!1 N' Her and Harrie likez totally fallz in love and getz married! And I like totallie just likez gave away the "Plot"!

By: Tweeny-weeny

Harry, and his two best friends were on the train that takes them to
that skool they like all go to when suddenly the prettiest girl in the
hole world walked in. Harry was like "Wow" and Ron was like drooling
over her perfect legs, shoulder length mahogony hair which looked like
the sun was glinting off it all the time and when she walked in really
confidently (A/N: shoot me now) she said "My name's Aurora Gabriella
Goldilocks Sunshine Granger." And Herminy was like "I have a sister!"

"Wow, Herminy your sister is really hot!"

"Yeah!" said Ron,

And Herminy and Aurora hugged and declared they wuld be best friends
for like forever and then Harry went down on one knee and said "Aurora
Gabriella Goldilocks Sunshine Granger" (A/N: yup, I have no more idea
than you how he remembered all her names) "I know I only just met you,
but I love you more than anything, I know in my heart you are the
secret to defeating Voldy, will you marry me?"

"Aurora Gabriella Goldilocks Sunshine Granger", what the hell kind of name is that? Hermione questioned raising her head from her work, as Ginny continued to read.

And Aurora smiled a smile that like lit up the compartment and said
"Harry, I thought you'd like never ask, of course I will my love, my
hero, my sweetheart, my darling, dearest, bravest (GAG) Harry we
will love each other for ever and always!"

Ron was really jealous because Harry had such gorgeous and lovely
girlfriend and because he had no one and because Ron was just like a
really jealous person who didn't deserve to have such aself-sacrificing, kind, handosome, noble friend as Harry. At least
that is what Aurora thought. And so he burst into tears and said "I
hate you Harry Potter, you knew of my eternal never ending love for
Aurora Gabriella Goldilocks Sunshine Granger and still you asked her
to marry you!"

Harry was sad and said, because he is like so totally the best friend,
"I'm sorry Ron. I have been a terrible friend but it's just that I
love Aurora more than anything, more than life itself, I would die for
her." And Ron felt like ashamed and said "I'm sorry Harry mate, I know
I don't love her as much as you do." And so they like made up and
suddenly Professor Snape appeared and said "Ronald Weasley I know this
is sudden but will you marry me?" and Ron forgot all about Aurora and
was so happy he thought he would never be sad again and so he said
"Yes, Professor Snape. I love you more than anything."

"Sweet Jesus, I'm glad Ron isn't here to read this, he would have a coniption." Harry said truthfully.

Just then Neville walked in and said "guess what Harry I just got
ordained in the holidays, now I can marry you and that girl who you
are like kissing so passionetly, yet sweetly and maturely, and I can
also marry Ron and Professor Snape."

"Ew, a wedding where Snape is present? Totally not dream wedding material." Ginny said as Harry nodded in agreement.

"Wow, like thanks Neville." Said Aurora, and Neville was surprised and
said "How did you know my name?" And Aurora replied "I can read
minds." And everyone was really excited and Harry kissed his perfect
girlfriend and thought she was the sexiest, cleverest, sweetest girl
ever and so he said "Neville wuld you marry Aurora and me. And Snape
said will you marry me and Ron and then I will forfeit the Quidditch
cup so Gryffindor win" And so Neville said "yes." And Harry and Aurora
got married in a large, golden double wedding with Ron and Professor
Snape. Draco was best man, because we like all no that he is really
Harry's best buddy. And Herminy was bridesmaid with Ron's sister and
that strange blonde girl who hung around last book and when they got
married Voldymort was so over comeby there pure, perfect, everlasting,
incredible, awe inspriring love that he exploded and the World was
saved.

THE END."

"Well that was truly horrible." Hermione suggested, as she went back to work.

Somewhere in Fiji

"No, Voldie I'm not going to have sex with you!...Well maybe if you let me and my friends go?" Ron proposed disgusted.

REMEMBER TO READ AND REVIEW PEOPLE.