You Left Me Alone Chapter 2: Thoughts, an angel fanfic

Title: You Left Me Alone
Author: Wereleopard
Posted: 02/06/05
Rating: PG
Email: PG
Genre: Angst
Summary: Angel until season 4.

Disclaimer: The characters in the Angel verse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made I am just poor.
Distribution: FSB if anywhere else please just let me know!
Feedback: Yes please!ut

N.B The first part of this is in the standalone section cause that is what it started out as.ion: Sure

Chapter 2

Angel wandered the streets alone the darkness covering him like a shroud, even if it had been daylight the suns rays would not have touched him, his soul was in agony, it cried out to be healed and there was only one person who could do that, his heart screamed out for the same person but his mind told him that he should be alone, that's the way it was supposed to be, even when he was with Buffy he still stayed in the background never coming forward, never mixing, Angel was never really included and then with all their ups and downs and the breaking up it still never hurt as much as hearing those words from his best friend, his heart broke when he looked into her face and then she told him that they were no longer friends. Angel turned to the wall and let out a roar it was a sound of pure agony and loss he vamped out his beast getting the better of his anger he punched the wall trying to release the frustration and the helplessness, he had lost something, something special, it was something that should have been treasured and what did he do? He kicked it to the curb like a piece of rubbish he threw it away like it didn't matter. He never knew how much it meant to him until it had gone. He turned around and put his back to the wall not knowing what to do, feeling lost, more lost then he had ever been before even in his darkest moments. Should he leave Cordy alone? No longer be friends just work colleagues. His thoughts were jumbled he had no idea what to do. Walking across the road he went into the bar and sat down and ordered a drink, he could have gone to Caritas but he just needed to be away from everyone so he could clear his mind and figure out what to do next. It was not very crowded and he hid in a dark corner, smoke filled the room, music played in the background.

One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
Two can be as bad as one, its the loneliest number since the number one
No is the saddest experience you'll ever know
Yes is the saddest experience you'll ever know
cause one is the loneliest number that you'll ever know
one is the loneliest number even worst then two

He knew things would work out eventually between him, Gunn and Wesley they had started already. But he could see how protective they were of Cordy, they had bonded when he'd fired them, if he did anything else to hurt her there was no doubt in his mind that they would both come after him to stake him and to be honest he wouldn't blame them, hell, if he did anything like that he would stake himself or walk into the sunlight. Angel made a promise to himself to try and never hurt her again. The vampire couldn't say that he wouldn't because that would be a lie he would just try not too, things happen and people hurt each other. That was the way life was. He sat back and closed his eyes, clearing his mind but one thing stayed a beautiful brunette, with brown eyes and a smile that would light up the darkest night.

Its just no good anymore since you went away
now I spend my time just making up rhymes of yesterday
one is the loneliest number
one is the loneliest number
one is the loneliest number
since you went away
since you went away

He saw every moment with her in his head so clearly as if it all happened today, it was like a movie in his mind, every laugh, every joke, and every cup of blood she heated. Angel tried to imagine life without her warmth, her friendship. The darkness suddenly filled everything; it chilled him from the inside. He could see the beast within him coming to the surface and there was nothing left to stop it. He would carry on helping but his heart would no longer be in it because she would not be at his side when he shashued. The tears slowly fell from his closed eyes. Angel wouldn't know how to carry on with out the frustrating woman by his side.

(one is the loneliest number since you've gone away)
one is the loneliest number
one is the loneliest number
one is the loneliest number
since you've gone away

His mind reached out, as the darkness seemed to consume him, the demons were after him. He reached for the one thing that would save him, that he now realised always saved him suddenly there she was in his mind like an angel and the darkness, the demons ran for cover they hid in the deepest recess's of his mind. Without his seer, without his Cordy the demons would win, he couldn't fight this battle without her. He knew that he had to get her back no matter what. Angel would do everything in his power to earn her friendship back he would prove it to her. The vampire hoped that she would be able to forgive him because he would never be able to forgive himself, but she was a better person than him. In fact, she was the best person he had ever known in his long life and just getting to know her made him a better person. He had to make her understand Angel stood up, he just hoped and prayed that he was not too late to make things better. He had no idea what to do but he would, there had to be something.