Title: You Left Me Alone
Author: Wereleopard
Posted:
Rating: PG
Email: Angst
Summary: Angel until season 4. Ok I know these have got lyrics to songs, well I have been listening to a lot and well it has been giving me ideas so I thought I would add them in.

Disclaimer: The characters in the Angel verse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made I am just poor and the song is by Eurythmics.
Distribution: FSB if anywhere else please just let me know!
Feedback: Yes please!ut

You Left Me Alone

Chapter 3

Well the sun came up this morning
Like a burning red balloon
It broke into my window
And it slipped across the room
It spread itself upon me
Like the smell of sweet perfume
I was sleeping like a baby

Cordy curled up on the sofa that was in the middle of the lobby at the Hyperion. The seer was not quite ready to go back home yet and plus it would make all the guys worry about her Wesley and Gunn could see how upset she was and Angel, well, he was the reason that she had two older brothers now hovering around her. Cordy was going to lay down upstairs when she realised where she was heading, to his room. It was automatic she used it when he wasn't asleep. Cordy couldn't remember when or why it started but it just did and now she paused and breathed deeply why was this so hard. Tears rolled down her face and she swiped them away angrily. Why couldn't she stop crying? She wasn't a crybuffy but the tears wouldn't stop and she was starting to get angry at herself. So what, Angel hurt her, they were fighting the good fight, and she told him they were just work colleagues but she saw the absolute desperation in his eyes. She had wanted to reach out and pull him to her and wipe away those doubts. But she couldn't he had hurt more than anyone ever had before he was the only one that had the power to do that.

I'm not a saviour
I'm not a saint
I'm not an angel
I'm not that quaint

Don't need a preacher
To be that wise
Don't need a teacher -
I've got my eyes...

You hurt me and I hate you
You hurt me

Her heart ached for him, she thought she knew him and vice versa but she was obviously wrong. Her best friend had turned away from her and Cordy had wanted to reach out and slap him, scream at him how could he have chosen his obsession with Darla over them over her? They were supposed to be friends, a family? Well her own parents had left her why was she surprised when it happened with someone else she cared about. It killed something inside of her when she turned to him and told him how she felt. He looked like a little boy that had lost something precious, it took all of her will power not to through herself into his arms and tell him she didn't mean it, she truly did. Angel had to understand what he did to her and if, and that was a big if, she forgave him it would only be this once and if he messed up again it would truly be over and she wasn't sure if that happened that she could look at him every night. She would have to phone the visions or relay them to Gunn or Wesley. She wouldn't be able to face him. Cordy hoped that it would not come to that.

A history of bitterness
You have left a blazing trail
If you had been a hammer
I'd be a broken nail
You gave me nothing -
Nothing but regrets
Don't think it's over -
It's not over yet

You hurt me & I hate you
You hurt me...

She did want to forgive him, so desperately her heart screamed for him, her soul joined the chorus but her head, her head told her to make him pay, to make him suffer just a little bit just so he could understand what she went through. She didn't know what to do, how she was going to make him suffer and then she told him the truth, they were no longer friends and that was when she realised as she looked at him that what she had said was more then suffering to him, it was a torment. In a way she felt she had sent him back to his own personal hell, but she wasn't sure if they could move past this, if she could ever trust him like that again. Cordy had Wesley and Gunn and she loved them and they were family but her and Angel's relationship was so different it was just so much more, they were complete opposites but they complimented each other. She could make him laugh and talk when no one else could and he could do the same to her. They trusted each other implicitly and that was missing now. She missed it, she missed his smile, his laugh, the sparkle in his eyes, she missed the way he held her when she had a vision, but most of all she missed the friendship. Cordy would always love Angel but sometimes that wasn't enough.

And everytime
You try to fool yourself
You've only got yourself
To blame
And every lie you ever
Told yourself
Will all come back to you
One day