Author: Sparkle Itamashii

Title: Clandestine Revelations

Warnings: Respect the rating. See profile for details.

Disclaimer: Digimon and its characters, settings, and plot are NOT MINE.

Chapter Four

Of course as soon as I told him I would tell him what was going on I found myself unable to speak. It was like everything I wanted to say got stuck somewhere between my brain and my tongue. All the things Kari'd been talking to me about, all the stuff that had been running on repeat through my head, anything that would have made any of it make sense had just abandoned me.

So I didn't say anything. I just stared mutely at my hands, wondering how long it would take him to get angry with me for not speaking.

"Tai…" He said softly after a moment, "Come on."

I sighed, picking nervously at my hand. I fought with Matt a lot. We'd beaten the crap out of each other numerous times, called each other horrible things, and pulled a million pranks on one another. Each of us had ostracized the other on more than one occasion, we bickered constantly about nothing, and we couldn't go five minutes without trading insults of some sort, usually petty.

Despite all of that, though, Matt was my best friend. No matter what we said or did it was the things we didn't say, the things we didn't do that meant the most. It was the fact that I didn't have to tell him what I was thinking because he already knew, and vice versa. It was the way that no matter what we'd come up against he didn't give up; he didn't back down from me. Even when it seemed like the entire rest of the world was going to fall apart he didn't leave.

He didn't stop being my friend.

Which is exactly what I was afraid of- that if I told him what I wanted to tell him, he'd stop being my friend. Truthfully I think I was scared of swaying either way- for better or worse. Either was a change I was definitely not prepared to handle.

I didn't have much of a choice, though. He'd know if I lied now.

"You know how I said Hikari sought me out to speak with me on Thursday…?" I asked, knowing I was delaying answering his question but I didn't care.

"Yeah. What about it?"

"She didn't want to talk to me about Takeru." I locked my gaze on my hands when I felt him stiffen just slightly.

"What did she want, then?" Suspicion was thick in his voice… god, had he already guessed what I was going to say?

"She wanted to talk to me… about you." I whispered, not even sure he heard me because I could hardly hear myself.

Slim fingers wrapped around my chin and I found myself looking upside down at Yamato as he gave me a funny look. "Please tell me Hikari still likes Takeru."

I laughed, pressing my nose into the palm of his hand as I reached up to pull his fingers away from my jaw. "She couldn't be more in love with him."

"Then why on earth would she want to talk to you about me?" He asked, confused. It was obvious he wasn't very concerned because his gaze flickered between maintaining eye contact and watching the movie.

"Well…" I closed my eyes, loosening my grip on his hand just in case. "She got this idea into her head that I like you."

He froze completely- I couldn't even hear him breathing. I closed my eyes tightly, wishing life came with a rewind button. Why did he have to go asking questions all the time? Why did I feel so compelled to answer him? I couldn't lie to him; I couldn't even lie through excluding information.

"She thinks that, huh?" His voice was strained. "Is she right? Do you?"

I made a malcontent noise of disgust with myself and opened my eyes a little bit. He hadn't moved his hand yet. "No." I said, though I knew I was lying. "Yes." That was wrong too. "I don't know. I…" I shook my head. "I dunno."

"Either you do or you don't, Taichi." He said seriously. "Which is it?"

"I don't know!" I snapped defensively. "I- She said a lot of things and it's been a little hard to sort it out, all right?" I felt him bristling again and immediately regretted getting irritated. "I'm sorry, Yama-"

"What did she say?"

I flinched at the accusing tone and tried to recall what Hikari had said that had made this situation sound like a remotely good place to be. "Sh-She said that she's seen the way we fool around all the time, and how when we fight we don't get hurt anymore. She said that… we're really close and always touching and…" I shifted uncomfortably, reminding myself of how we were currently sitting. "Stuff like that, I guess. Stuff she always feels nervous doing around Takeru but thinks we do easily."

Somehow it seemed a little less valid now that I'd said it aloud to Yamato. He still hadn't moved. I could practically feel the explosion lingering just below the surface, waiting to be set off by any little thing. When Hikari had pointed out those things, in the context that she had… I admit; I was a little shell-shocked. I'd taken time the following morning to watch Yamato, trying to decide if what she'd said held any grain of truth.

It had turned out to be far to close to the truth for comfort.

"I never thought about it." He said quietly, his tone betraying how deeply he was considering what I had said. "Did she say anything else?"

I closed my eyes again, not wanting to tell him the rest but not seeing that he'd accept a lie for an answer. "Yeah." I mumbled.

"What did she say, Taichi…"

"She said she thinks you like me too." I breathed, knowing that would be the turning point in this conversation.

Silence fell and neither of us moved. There were a million things running through my head so fast that it felt blank, empty. I could practically hear the gears turning in Yamato's brain but I couldn't tell if it was for good or bad. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and, fixing my sights on my thumbs, I spoke.

"Do you…?" My voice cracked over the simple question.

/End Chapter Four, Clandestine Revelations/