Title: It Would Have Been Like
Author: Dwight4Studly
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Harry is desperate to know what it would have been like to live with Sirius if he had not fallen behind the veil. He just finds out more than what he knew.
AN/ I know, I know. It's been a long time, but I'm here now and that's fine, isn't it? I hope none of you have forgotten this story. Anyway, I hope you like it, either way.
Chapter 6: A mind full of questions
Harry awoke to the bright light of the afternoon sun. He squinted his eyes, pulling his glasses on. It had to be no later than noon. He stretched, bedcovers tangling in his legs before he stood form the comfort of sleep. It took him a bit to register where exactly he was; and when he did, everything came back in a flood.
Sirius was alive—Professor Lupin and Sirius—The full moon …
Harry sighed hugely, rubbing his face. He couldn't believe he was so blind as to not see it before. The way they would meet each other's eyes. The way they would always know what the other thought. How easily forgiveness came to them. Hell, they had given him a bloody joint Christmas gift. Harry shook his heads in his own daftness.
He wandered to the kitchen and made a pot of tea. A few minutes later, the whistle of the kettle broke him from his reverie and he set up a tray. He didn't know exactly why he was making his way to their door, and didn't know what to do when he got there, but he was.
The door stood tall and Harry felt absolutely clueless. Am I really ready for this? He thought, not sure of what he would see. Quietly, he knocked at the door with his toe. After a moment of no answer, he took a deep breath and pushed it open.
The space was dark with the curtains drawn. Harry felt as if he was intruding on something sacred, something secret. But it wasn't a secret anymore, so he moved on.
The room was sparse of furniture with only a wardrobe, two nightstands with lamps and pictures in frames, a wooden chair in the corner, and a decent sized bed. The bed was in the center, against the wall, and was very quaint with no head or footboard. The colors didn't scream GAY, just beige and red undertones with russet furniture. It was just normal room, much like his own.
Someone moved and Harry finally had the courage to look at them. Remus lay sprawled on his back, gingerly placed limbs in neat fashion next to his torso. Sirius was on his stomach, his arm draped over Remus' chest and fingers softly curled around the curve of his body. Their foreheads rested gently against the others as each other's breathes caused wisps of hair to stir.
Harry decided that whatever he was thinking was clearly not true and that he was just going to have to become accustomed to the way they were. With that out of his mind, Harry set the tray down on what was probably Professor Lupin's nightstand, brushing aside a picture of a couple. They were smiling and waving at him as he set it to the other side of the stand, not paying attention to what they were waving exactly to. Harry did this quietly and quickly. As much as he was going to accept them, he still didn't want to disturb them. At all.
Harry turned to leave, making his footfall soft and silent.
"Harry? … Is everything all right?"
He froze, the gruff voice behind him startling him. Professor Lupin cleared his throat as quietly as he could, apparently trying not to wake Sirius beside him.
Harry's mouth went dry for a second, but then he wetted his lips as he turned around to the man lying in the bed.
"I'm sorry to wake you, Pro- I mean, Remus. I just thought you two would like some tea. I thought you would be awake. I mean, it's all ready noon and maybe-"
"That's fine, Harry. You've no need to worry. I needed to wake, anyway," he said, sitting up gingerly. Sirius rolled over to his side, facing away form both of them. Remus made a sour face at him.
"You'd think that everything he's been through, he'd be able to wake at the drop of a hat. I guess some things never change," Remus said, shaking his head, smiling all the while. They both watched him sleep for a while, watching as he reached back and scratched behind his ear jerkily, then settle back down into the covers.
Harry smiled at the Professor nervously, glancing around the room. When Remus had set the light on with the careful tap of his wand, Harry could see the heavy curtains on the windows and knew that they were very old. He didn't know exactly what he should do in this situation.
Remus picked up one of the cups and nearly filled it to the rim. Sitting back against the wall, he considered Harry, who was lost in thought, for a moment.
"Why don't you have a seat, Harry? Have some tea," he said, gesturing to the chair in the corner and to the extra cup. "Tell me what you're thinking about."
"Oh," he said, looking around him. He spotted the chair, and brought it closer to the bed. He sat down on the sturdy wood, oddly comforted by the structure against his back. He really had nothing to worry about, he tried to tell himself. It wasn't like Professor Lupin would be harsh with him for anything. He never had.
Yet, so many questions surfaced in Harry's mind. What were his parents really like? How did he and Sirius start feeling such things about each other? What was it like to have Sirius go to Azkaban, and then fall behind the Veil as well? But he wouldn't know what he was talking about, would he?
Remus took a timid sip of the hot liquid and stared at Harry, meeting the emerald irises with his own amber ones.
"What's it like … being a werewolf? I mean, when were you bitten … how …?" Harry asked apprehensively.
Remus gave a sick sort of smile, looking down into his tea for a moment.
"I was six when we moved to Germany. My mother had relatives close to the Dark Forest, and I would go out into it. One night, I made the mistake to go out, against my mother and father's wishes, to do a bit of exploring. I don't remember much of the bite itself, or much after. All I can remember are fragments. Certain sights, smells. The trees were black against the sky, gaps vibrant in the white light of the moon. I can't remember what it was like when I was bitten, only that the air tasted of copper.
"When my mother followed me she found us, and stunned him. I never found out whom it was …" He took another sip from his tea, hands shaking slightly against the porcelain.
"When I transform, it burns everywhere. I feel my back arch, and it's like I'm being bent completely in half. All I can see is red, all I can taste is blood. The roaring is louder than the cracking of bones, and the pain is dulled after a while. And then it's like I pass out, like I go into a coma. But those are on bad nights …
"When Padfoot is there," he says gently, softly reaching over and touching Sirius hair before continuing his story, "all of my senses are sharpened. The world is gray, but I don't need color. The smells tell me everything that I need to know. The fresh grass, the rustling trees. The color is all there. And Padfoot … Well …" He smiled, lips curling slowly upwards against the rim of his cup before taking another drink.
Sirius turned again, lying on his back with his arm flung over his forehead. His eyes squeezed shut tightly, jaw clenching as he leaned his head back. His black hair splayed across the pillow when he turned over towards the two that watched him. Slowly opening his eyes, he huffed, looking between them for a moment.
"Morning, Sirius." Remus said, trying to keep the smile out of his voice as he rested his cup in his hands on his lap. Harry sat back in his chair, watching them both.
Groggily lifting his head, Sirius took another look around the room, and set his eyes on the teacup in Remus' lap, mere inches away from his face. Sitting up half way, he reached out, taking the cup, and downed the rest of the contents. Remus gaped visibly, looking incredulously from Sirius to Harry in the chair.
Harry grinned at him while Sirius smiled sweetly, kissing his cheek as an apology.
"Don't think I'll pardon your stealing with such a measly kiss." Remus said, smiling.
"Oh, Moony," Sirius said scandalously, "If you just wanted that, all you had to say was-"
"Oh, shut it, you. You perverted, dirty, little …"
"And you, dear Moon Child of Love, are perverted for putting for my perversions. Why, I didn't hear you complain when I-"
"That's it," Remus said a bit too loudly, getting up from the bed delicately, taking care from straining the bruised muscles or the aches. "Harry, I'm a bit hungry. How about we go find something for lunch?"
Harry smiled at their antics, helping Remus from the bed.
"Aww. C'mon, Moony!" Sirius cried, scrambling up from the bed, rushing over to his side exaggeratedly. Brushing Harry gently to the side, Sirius clung himself to the side of the disgruntled werewolf. "I'll fix us some bacon sandwiches. You can have more than both of us." He reached over and slung his arm around Harry's shoulder, pulling him in.
Remus chuckled, patting Sirius on the head. "That's a good lamb, then."
A.N. (Again? I can hear the groans from all of you over the speakers)/ If anyone can guess, the bacon sandwich reference was of that from The 10th Kingdom, one of the most amazing T.V. movie series that man has ever created. Ten points to the house that can think of a bacon quote from the movie or the book! In the mean while, I think I'll make myself on of those puppies right now.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Sorry that it was shorter than I usually have it, but expect more, longer, chapters in the not so distant future. Oh, and did I mention to review?